23. see it in her eyes

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23 | "I'm sorry

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23 | "I'm sorry. No matter how much I try, I feel I owe you my life."

Yuri and I were silent

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Yuri and I were silent. She's been staring at me from across my bedroom, sitting on my windowsill while I sit on my bed. It has been days since we met and talked. Heeseung even asked me what happened between us–and apparently, Yuri didn't say a word. I couldn't even bat my eyelashes at her, plead to somehow say something–she looked distraught being in the same room with me.

"If it wasn't me, Hayoon," Yuri finally raises her voice. I lift my head, listening attentively. "Would you have told me what happened to you?"

"Maybe," I don't even hesitate. "Because I know you'd sympathize. However, I would've told you sooner... if you were the person who apologized to me years ago."

"Doesn't it hurt you, Hayoon?" She was never the type to say my name so upsettingly, over and over. It was the first time my name quickly slipped from her mouth. "Why aren't you upset with me? With Heeseung? You lost your mother, had to move away for the time being, and still had to get up daily with the same, gut-wrenching pain without batting an eye. How can you not scream at me?"

"Because it wasn't your fault," I reply, keeping it simple. "Yuri, why would I blame you for something out of your control? It's not your fault, not Heeseung's, nor your parents–"

"No, they're liable," Yuri points at me, grimacing. "Sure, seven-to-eight-year-olds aren't, but my parents are like murderers. We owed you an apology, you were supposed to put them in jail, and yet, you and your dad dropped the charges–"

"Because things happen," I stress, interrupting her. "Yuri, things happen for a reason. Sure, I was bitter, for a really, really long time. However, I've already moved on, and I'm not going to blame a car accident on you. I'm not going to blame the distractions, disruptions, or even gravity and tie it all to your family. So please, you've said enough apologies. You traumatized me with them when I was a child."

"What?" She whispers. I wasn't getting anywhere. No matter how I phrase it, I was still breaking Yuri to her core. She must've held as much guilt as I've held sorrow. "We traumatized you?"

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