ataraxia (izuku midoriya x reader) (on hiatus)

02

aplomb

ⁿᵒᵘⁿ
self confidence
~

having a good sense of who you are is one of the most important things in life. if you know who you are, you can have a good idea of who you want to be, and how much you want to change to achieve that.

i try to be good. i try to be a model student. however, i struggle to keep up my good attitude. i have to tuck away any negative feeling.. feelings in general.

i sighed to myself and padded down the dorm corridors. i needed a snack. and a big glass of water.

i sighed as my glass filled under the tap.

the issue is, i can't live up to who i am. who my father is. who my mother was. who i am supposed to be. honestly speaking, having a personal bond with my father has always been out of the question, he was never at home to be my dad anyway.

after chugging all of the water in my glass, i heard whispers in the commonroom, so i stopped my movements and listened in.

"kacchan, we cant go out now. it's past curfew."

i knew that voice. midoriya.

"shut up."

bakugou.

those two were gonna get in a lot of trouble for going out past curfew. what were they doing?

i was obviously going to follow them, as curiosity always kills the cat.

they went out through the front door and after a few seconds, i went out after them. i used my quirk to fly up, out of sight, so neither those two, nor the bots would detect me.

we reached ground bete within a few minutes, and i sat on top of a building, watching this fight unfold.

they began the physical fight, and the sheer power of bakugou's explosions broke the windows on most buildings in the area.

he was strong, hot tempered and, even though he didn't look it, he was smart.

izuku was just as smart, but with his quirk, he was much more powerful if he could work at 100%. he was also determined and fierce if he wanted to be.

i had always knew of the agressive tension between the two of them, and i prefered to keep my dislike for midoriya especially quiet and minimal. i wouldn't want to stress out the poor boy even more.

i'm not that morally twisted.

besides he had a lot on his plate anyway. wielding his quirk, learning to use it, living up to high expectations.

i guess, in a way, were in the same boat. even though hes a floor or two higher than me.

he didn't necessarily deserve it. or need it. nor did he have the right to it.

i deserved my father's love way more than he did. but i never got it. not even now that my father is now, distance wise, closer to me than he had been in literal years.

i guess that was why i disliked midoriya. he stole my dad.

i never exactly blamed him to his face. it was mainly in the back of my mind. i mostly blamed my dad. he was the one neglecting me. i raised myself. mirai sasaki raised me.  sorahiko torino raised me. they both did so much more than my dad. yet i was still angry with midoriya.

gramps and mirai still contacted me regularly. they spoke more with me over the phone than my father did at all.

my phone buzzed in my pocket.

———
DAD

Meet me in the infirmary
in 20 min.

ok

———

i placed my phone back in my pocket and flew back to my dorm. but a big explosion from the two boys behind me blew me a bit higher.

holy shit.

those two are strong.

i picked up the pace and opened the sliding door to my dorm room, just to seem inconspicuous to mr aizawa who is probably awake because that man does not sleep at night.

i floated through the corridors, careful not to touch my outside shoes to the floors of carpets in the dorm building.

once i was outside, i calmly walked to the infirmary as if i wasn't just outside a few minutes ago. i made sure to take my time, and to take in the cool summer night air.

i heard aizawa's yelling when i entered.

jeez, who knew he could be this loud?

they were grounded by aizawa.

i stood off to the side as aizawa left, feeling both the teenage boys' stares on me. i crossed my arms over my ches when i looked at my father.

"you wanted me here?" i asked disinterestedly. "yes." he said and turned to the two boys. "young bakugou, y/n also knows of my power. y/n, young midoriya is my successor."

"i know." i deadpanned, the  i walked out, taking flight to the dorm building.

what the hell? does he think I'm stupid? does he think I'm mentally deficient? jeez. i guess i am just some kid to him.