You are my Soul

☾hapter XIV

The day before the expedition had been remarkably eventful. Jean, in an unexpected turn of events, had approached Mikasa and me to offer a heartfelt apology for his previous behavior. His actions had left me fuming, but I could sympathize with his desire to ensure that his life had meaning in the grand scheme of things.

Petra and I had ventured into town for some much-needed shopping, a rare treat these days. It was a delightful break from the usual routine. While browsing, we stumbled upon a collection of necklaces that piqued our interest.

We couldn't resist the temptation to personalize them, engraving words on the back. Petra chose 'Izzy' for hers, while I settled on 'Peanut' for mine. Her enthusiasm was contagious, as she expressed how thrilled she was to have another girl on the team to share these small pleasures with.

Returning to headquarters, I left Petra to visit her parents before our impending expedition, not wanting to intrude on her personal time. Alone, I sought out Mikasa, Armin, and Eren to share the truth about my blocked memories.

In the courtyard, with no one else in sight, Armin greeted me with a warm smile," Hey, Izzy. How was your day ?".

" It was great, thanks, Arly. But can we all talk ?". I replied.

Curiosity flickered in Eren's eyes," Sure, Izzy. What's on your mind ?".

Shaking my head, I said," Not here, follow me".

The three of them exchanged puzzled glances, concern etched on their faces. I led them to an unoccupied room, scanning the surroundings for hidden eavesdroppers before closing the door.

" Izzy, you're starting to scare me. What's going on ?". Armin asked, his voice tinged with nervousness.

Mikasa's solemnity added to the tension," If you've killed someone, we'll help you hide the body".

My eyes widened in bewilderment," What ? No, I didn't kill anyone".

Relieved sighs escaped Armin and Eren as they heard my clarification.

Mikasa, however, remained focused," Then why all the secrecy ?".

I gathered my thoughts," I wanted to talk to you about something that's been haunting me for a long time".

The three nodded, their apprehension palpable.

" Ever since I was a child, I've had glimpses of future events, like flashes of memories. But some of these 'flashes' remain locked away". I confessed.

Eren leaned forward, intrigued," What do you mean ?".

I bowed my head," When Marco touched my shoulder, I saw his death. I tried my best to change his fate, but sadly, I couldn't".

Armin expressed his sympathy," Izzy, that must have been incredibly difficult".

I decided to shift the conversation away from Marco," I saw Squad Leader Ian's death too. When he looked into my eyes, I knew he'd die saving a comrade from a Titan. So, I intervened and killed the Titan, saving him".

Eren was astounded," That's incredible, Izzy. You've been carrying this burden since childhood ?".

I nodded, crossing my arms," It used to be sporadic and less clear when I was younger, but now it happens more frequently".

Armin pondered the situation," Why are these memories blocked, and where do they come from ?".

I couldn't provide a definitive answer," I have no idea".

Well, not entirely true. I thought nervously.

Mikasa was deeply concerned," Is it painful when these memories resurface ?".