I'll Be Fine (All Time Low Fanfic)

Chapter 31

April 2006

Everyone was silent on the way home. I snuggled into Matt who was warm and comforting. Alex's outbreak had shocked everyone. I was the only one who knew why he had said no to being signed. Being signed to a record label was their dream and Alex had just said no without anyone discussing it.  Out of nowhere the rain began to fall. I watched the drops trickle down the window pane. The sky was dark but the stars shone bright.

"Um guys, I need to stop on Thames Street for a minute. I promised my mom I'd pick up some food." Rian said. "Is that okay?"

"Yeah that's cool." Jack said. He'd been really upset, Alex roared at him. I smiled over atmy best friend. He tried to smile back but his attempt was weak. I hated to see him like this.Even though he was my "older" best friend, he was still so childish and immature that I was very protective over him. I reached out and squeezed his hand. He reached over and ruffled my hair with his other hand. Rian pulled the car over and hopped out. 

"I won't be too long, I promise." the rain had already soaked him before he'd even run into the restaurant. The car was once again filled with a tense silence.

"Wait, what I don't understand is why the man ran after you? I mean how did he know you were going to our dressing room." Zack turned to me.

"He said he was collecting feedback from the audience to see what the younger generation thought. When Iz told him she was friends with us he followed her presuming she was coming to see us." Alex said bluntly.

"Oh." Zack said quietly trying to to disturb anyone. Matt's arms tightened around me. His lips brushed off my head softly. The car door slammed and Alex was gone.

"It's been a few minutes. I'll go after him." I said grabbing my jacket.

"No!" Jack and  Matt exclaimed in sync. "You are not going out in that rain." Jack warned.

"But Alex-" I tried to argue.

"Alex is being a dickhead Iz. He gets like this sometimes, he need to cool off."

"No. I want to go talk to him. When was the last time you actually talked to him? Asked him how he was? You don't even know what's going on in your best friends life anymore. You've been so caught up in how I am, and I love and appreciate you for that but you've forgotten Alex. Think about that." I took the opportunity of Jack's bewilderment to escape. I ran holding the heavy Blink-182 hoodie ab over my head for shelter. I realised I couldn't see when I tripped over my own two feet and slammed against the wet floor.

"Shit, Izzy! Iz are you okay?" Alex's feet slammed against the wet floor.

"Mhmmm." I said trying to sit up, still unsure myself. I looked down at my nose making him laugh. He held onto my  shoulder and sat my down on the curb.

"You always were the clumsiest person." he smiled.

"Shut up!" I protested. A sharp pain pierced through my jaw. Ouch, I hoped it was just the after shock. He laughed gently wrapping his arm around my shoulder, sheltering me from the rain.

"Are you okay?" I asked. The rain felt nice and refreshing after being stuck in a crowded sweaty room for hours.

"Says the one who just fell slat on her face." Alex laughed.

"You know what I mean."

"Yeah, I guess. I mean this is our dream. We've always wanted All Time Low to make it. We thought we could. We wanted to be up there with Blink and New Found Glory and we got the chance and I blew it for them." he sighed rubbing his face with his hands. 

"But hey, Lex, that's not your fault. You can't help that. They're mad because they don't understand why you said no. Them guys are your best friends and some of the nicest guys in the world. They'll understand when you tell them. I think it's about time they knew." I looked down at the puddle surrounding us. I stared at our reflection in the puddle. His dark eyes were lost and confused.He closed them so we lost contact. He nodded.

"I will Iz. Thanks." he said standing up.

"Alex, you don't have much time left. Remember what you said to me? That you want to enjoy the rest of your time here? Well do that! There's no point in being sad. Enjoy the time you have left." I surprised myself and jumped up suddenly. "Live Alex. It's the best time to do it now. You're still young remember that. Make mistakes. Do stupid things. Try something new. Do something crazy!" I screamed. I squinted through the rain but I could see he was as shocked as me. "Release your inhibitions, feel the rain on your skin!" I sang, dancing in the puddles. I spun around laughing, surprising myself. For once I had listened to myself. I was still young. I was going tomake mistakes, do stupid things and I still had plenty time to do it. "No one else can feel it for you only you can let it in. No one else no one else can speak the words on your lips." I grabbed his hand and pulled him up to run around with me. I threw my arms in the air letting the rain pour on top of me. "Drench yourself in words unspoken."

"Live your life with arms wide open. Today is where your book begins." he walked toward me, both soaked to the skin. His arms wrapped around my waiat and pulled me in to him. Our soaking bodies touched. His hand wiped some of my wet hair out of my way.

"The rest is still unwritten." I smiled.

"Isabel no! I can't believe you! You're not the type of person." Heather said. I hid my face in my hands not able to see the disapproving look I knew she was giving me.

"I know Heather! I'm so sorry! I know, it's not something I'd do it's just... I think someone like spiked my water at the gig." I lied.

"Oh come on, don't make yourself believe that! Iz, I can't believe you kissed him. Do you remember all that time you thought he was cheating on you. And all that time he was with Lisa? How angry and how much you hated Alex for doing that to you? How long it took you to get over him again? If you get back with him now it has to be for good. It's Matt or Alex." she shrugged. 

"There is no option. It's Matt. It has to be Matt." I sighed.

"But sweetie, you don't seem happy about that." she shut down the computer and joined me on the bed wrapping her arm around my shoulder." Maybe that break was all you two needed. You both obviously have feelings for each other. Just break it off with Matt, tell him you're not over Alex, and ask to be friends." Heather said.

"I can't." I felt a tear coming on but quickly wiped my eyes.

 "Why baby? Matt's lovely. He'll understand."

"No I know that. It's just I have to stay with Matt. Otherwise if I get too close to Alex, I'll be heartbroken..." I trailed off remembering my promise to Alex to keep his secret.

"Iz, Alex isn't going to do that again." she reassured.

"Heather, you are my best friend. Can I trust you with something."

"No."

"What?"

"Of course." she scoffed rolling her eyes.

"I can't get back with Alex because in the summer he's moving to the UK. If I get attached again to him now, then I'll be worse again once he leaves. It's why he broke up with me last year. He wanted me to be okay with it." I looked at her face. Her eyes were wider than the time we went to the amusement park and she needed to puke after the Ferris wheel.

"Woah, it all makes sence now. He wasn't being a total dick!" I shook my head. "But hthe UK? Why is Alex moving to the UK?"

"What do you mean Alex is moving to the UK?" Jack stood in my doorway.