an organized mess of redacted asmr

《 even MORE incorrect quotes 》

yup. again.

except they're random this time.
and there's a lot more.

it's mostly the wolf pack, i'm not sorry-

aLSO! surprise! new character alert!

i wanted to add him sooner, but i kept adding other characters and he just got overshadowed for a bit. also, i couldn't think of a dramatic entrance for him, so this'll have to do :')
-

avior: i made tea.

starlight: i don't want tea.

avior: i didn't make tea for you. this is my tea.

starlight: then why are you telling me?

avior: it's a conversation starter.

starlight: that's a lousy conversation starter.

avior: oh, is it? we're conversing. checkmate.

- ʚ♡ɞ -

freelancer: poison is a magic transmutation potion that turns people into corpses.

gavin: this knife is actually a magic wand.

damien: meet me in the denny's parking lot for a wizard duel.

huxley: *cocks gun* magic missile.

lasko: what the fuck is wrong with you people.

- ʚ♡ɞ -

freelancer: you really put aside everything and came all this way for me? how did you even get here so fast?

gavin: several traffic violations.

damien: three counts of resisting arrest.

huxley: roughly thirteen cans of energy drinks.

lasko: also, that's not our car.

- ʚ♡ɞ -

lasko: you kidnapped freelancer? that's illegal!

huxley: but lasko, what's more illegal? briefly inconveniencing freelancer, or destroying our dreams?

lasko: kidnapping freelancer, huxley!!!

damien: lasko, listen, whatever i may think of you right now‐ these guys are counting on you to inspire them!

lasko: what, to kidnap people?!?!

damien: to work together!

lasko: TO KIDNAP PEOPLE?!?!?!?

gavin: lasko, we all agreed a celebrity is not a people.

- ʚ♡ɞ -

sam: violence isn't the answer.

darlin': you're right.

sam: *sighs in relief*

darlin': violence is the question.

sam: what?

darlin', bolting away: and the answer is yes.

sam, running after them: NO-

- ʚ♡ɞ -

vincent: wake me up..

lovely: before you go go!

sam: when september ends..

darlin': WAKE ME UP INSIDE-

- ʚ♡ɞ -

cop: you're receiving a ticket for having three people on one motorcycle.

vincent: shit.

lovely: wait, three?

cop: yeah?

sam: OH MY GOD DARLIN' FELL OFF!!!

- ʚ♡ɞ -

david, addressing the pack: and if you have any suggestions, feel free to put them in the suggestion box.

asher: but - that's just a trash can.

david: it sure is!

- ʚ♡ɞ -

milo: fuck.

sweetheart: we need to work on your cursing.

milo: why? i'm pretty good at cursing already.

- ʚ♡ɞ -

asher: oh, just so you know, it's very muggy outside

babe:

babe: asher, i swear, if i step outside and all of our mugs are on the front lawn..

asher: *sips coffee from a bowl*

- ʚ♡ɞ -

david: yesterday, i overheard milo saying "are you sure about this?" and asher replying "trust me," and i have never moved from one room to another so quickly in my life.

- ʚ♡ɞ -

david: you have to apologize to asher.

milo: fine.

milo: 'unfuck you' or whatever.

- ʚ♡ɞ -

david: milo, keep an eye on asher today. he's going to say something to the wrong person and get punched.

milo: sure, i'd love to see asher get punched.

david: try again.

milo, sighing: i will stop asher from getting punched.

- ʚ♡ɞ -

david: what do you think asher will do for a distraction?

milo: he'll probably, like, make a noise or throw a rock. that's what i would do.

*building explodes and several car alarms go off*

milo: ... or he could do that.

- ʚ♡ɞ -

*asher and milo sitting in jail together*

milo: so who should we call?

asher: i'd call david, but i feel safer in jail.