New - Lauren Cimorelli

Episode 41

It's been a week since the trip we had and today the video would be uploaded. Lisa didn't have to edit much honestly, I was pretty happy with the result, I knew it wouldn't be perfect. I didn't even know how perfect would be like, so this was the best I got. Spencer approved it too, she didn't really seem to care, she was okay with everything as long as I was okay with it. I've been dropping some pictures and stories with Spencer throughout the week, also saying specifically her name, so people will know immediately that it's her. From the comments it didn't seem like anyone was suspecting, they just wanted to know who that was and how come I was suddenly blasting things with her. Spencer was being really cool with me filming her, I think that it makes a different for her when it's spontaneous, that's when she acts most like herself.

In a good timing for the video, yesterday I posted the music video for Brown Eyed Boys that my ex was starring. They would probably know who it is, so before they speculate much, today they'll know about Spencer. Spencer knew my ex would be in the video, but she trusted me and didn't mind it. Those kind of things made me feel so lucky to have her, I didn't like the jealous type that would suffocate me.

"The thumbnail of the premiere is on, Christina says I should post something in advance" I told Amy who was cooking us some breakfast.

"Okay, then just write whatever comes to your mind"

I took a deep breath and opened Instagram to start typing a post. But I was looking at the empty draft for a long time without knowing how to even begin to write it.

"I don't know what to say" I whined and put the phone down.

"Listen, you're good with words, you always know what to say and you always nail it... and everytime it comes from your heart, so just roll with it" She encouraged me and her words did the work.

"If you saw the upcoming new video on our YouTube channel, I just want you to not worry, it's okay" I read to my sister out loud what I just wrote and she smiled.

"Yeah, I think that does the work, and after the premiere are you going to write about Spencer and tag her?" She asked and I nodded.

"That would take longer to think about."

"I just told you, don't think, just do it" She insisted and put the plate on the table.

"Thanks" I said putting my phone away and started eating as she sat in front of me.

"Alright, thanks guys, see ya, bye" I made a shape of heart on the TV, then the video ended with a "Thanks for watching!" writing.

"Pretty shy? That's how you would describe me?" Spencer faked being offended and I put my head on her shoulder cuddling up to her, not caring about what she said.

"I love you" I just said and closed my eyes, it was a relief knowing it was now behind me.

"I love you too babe, I'm proud of you" She kissed my temple, "Be right back, I'm going to pee" She chuckled and got up to my bathroom.

I took that chance to read again the draft I've written before Spencer came to see me. After proving that it was good, I posted it along with a picture of Spencer and I from last weekend's trip, in our private pool that we had in our room. I loved that picture and I was really debating on making it as my wallpaper or screen saver of my phone.

'@SpenceBrady This last year has been life changing for me, I don't think you'll take this seriously if I tell you that you taught me how to love for real and how it's like to feel loved. But it's serious, okay? I don't know what's in store for the world this year with everything that's going on, it's a little scary tbh, but it looks brighter and easier knowing that I got you (no pun intended lol).