New - Lauren Cimorelli

Episode 19

I felt someone sitting next to me in the airplane on our way to Connecticut, I thought it would be Kath because we both somehow got separated seats from the rest. I didn't look over, I had my headphones on and my eyes were closed. But then someone pulled my headphones away and I knew who it was, Kath doesn't do that.

"Hey" Dani looked a little scared, I sighed and looked at her, waiting for her to say what she had in mind, "How're you feeling?" She asked me.

"Better."

"You haven't had a panic attack in years, I'm sorry..."

"Sorry for what?" I asked confused.

"It was my fault, that stupid fight that we had, I should've just let it go" She said as she looked down.

"Dani, that had nothing to do with you" I tried to reassure her but she shook her head, not believing me, "Look at me" I only continued when she did what I asked her to, "My thoughts were spiraling in a loop, it was my brain playing tricks with me, I did this to myself, not you" I explained as clear as I could to her.

"And..." She looked around us, to make sure no one we knew was around us, "Spencer had something to do with those tricks?"

"We broke up" I told her and sat straight, not looking at her.

"What happened?"

"I don't know... I was being stupid and I lost her" I shrugged my shoulders not wanting to start crying.

"And you can't fix it?" She asked.

"I called her yesterday after I got home, she didn't pick up. It's been a lot happening lately you know, and I just... Didn't let her be there for me, and I wasn't there for her..."

"It's your choice to not let her in if you don't want to, she shouldn't judge you for that"

"She just said I spent more time in church than with her, and she was right" I said lowering my voice hinting for her to do the same.

"No, Laur, you're allowed to-"

"Dani!" I stopped her, "You don't need to defend me. I'm not saying she was an angel in all of this, she could've reached out, ask me how I'm doing, be with me, or just not get mad and let me deal with everything like you said... I know all of that, but it was my fault too." I told her and that made stay her silence.

"I don't want you to get hurt Sugar" She just said and I smiled at her.

"I'll be okay."

"And I don't want us to fight anymore, I'm really sorry for everything" Dani continued, I know telling her she didn't have to apologize is not gonna ease her, so I put my hand on hers and nodded.

"I don't wanna fight either, this is our last tour together, gotta make it count" I winked at her and her mouth turned into a big smile.

"It'll be the best one."

"It better be."

**

"Go right here guys" Christina indicated us, "I'm gonna check this... It's great, okay, ready?"

"Do you think anyone's gonna see this?" Lisa asked us.

"There's only one way to find out" Kath answered, "Alright, you ready guys? Okay, ready? Three two... 'Hey, we're Cimorelli, we're six sisters from California and we're gonna sing Party In The USA'."

I heard the crowd understanding what we were doing and cheering as we started to recreate our first YouTube cover, this time on the stage, in front of a fake vintage video camera that Mike let us borrow.