" Help wanted: join I.m.p and kill humans for money", that's how daren the demon decided to join blitz and his gang of imp misfits, with the exception of the cute hellhound loona. Join him through his journey through hell to find love, fun and fuck...
"SMASH" ?- I CAN'T BELIVE YOU SLEPT WITH A IMP, IN OUR FUCKING BED. Stolas- It was unexpected, I didn't have time to go to a motel. ?- A MOTEL, LIKE A FUCKING PLEBIAN. Via- "GGGGGGRRRRROOOOAAANNNN" every morning. Loona- looks like it was a bad night for a sleepover. Daren- are your parents always like this. Via- yes. We were currently staying at vias for a sleepover, only to wake up due to her parents, we get up and dressed as via pops in her earbuds. We walk down the hall to the kitchen, I barely dodge a potted plant being thrown at me, we walk in to see Stella and Stolas fighting.
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Stella- YOU WANT TO FUCK THIS ONE TOO. She throws a imp servant at Stolas as he ducks. Stolas- no, of course not. Stella- YOU ARE A GOD DAMN EMBARRASSMENT, LETTING OUR DAUGHTER HANG OUT AND WORK WITH FILTH- Daren- WA- Via- Daren, please, there's enough fighting. Stolas- DON'T YOU DARE INSULT OUR GUESTS, VIA FINALLY MADE SOME FRIENDS, BE HAPPY. Stella- WHAT FRIENDS, A FLEA BAG AND A IDIOT. Daren- THAT'S IT. Via- Daren, please. I reluctantly sit down as via holds my hand. Via- thank you. Stolas- STELLA ENOUGH. Stella- YOU KNOW WHAT, I'M LEAVING, I'M NOT SPENDING ANOTHER MINUTE LOOKING AT YOUR PATHETIC, IMP SUCKING FACE. She rushes out and tosses plants. Stolas sighs as he turns to us. Stolas- I'm so sorry, my wife is....very strict about appearances. Daren- it's cool Stolas. Stolas- And good morning my owlet, did you sleep well. Via- is that a serious question. Stolas walks over to the fridge. Stolas- what is that your listening to. Via- this song is called " my world is burning down around me" by "fuck you dad" it's a band. Daren- hint, hint. Stolas- "nervous" oh, how charming. Loona- that shit slaps. Stolas pulls out a piece of zebra meat and feeds it to a giant plant. Via- you two done screaming for the day. Stolas- uh- Stella- AAAAAHHH. She tosses a plant into the kitchen, hitting me. Via- DAREN. Stolas- OH MY DEAR BOY, are you alright. Daren- immm fiinnn. Loona- take the pot off your head. Daren- eettss, ssssttaakk. Stolas- here. He grabs it and yanks it off my head, I'm covered in dirt. Stolas- you know what, let's do something we haven't done in a long time, why don't we all go to loo loo land. Via- I'm not five anymore dad. Stolas- you were always so happy when we went to loo loo land, how about a day, just the 4 of us. Via- I'd......rather kill myself. Daren- And I would stop you. Via- " RED AS SHIT" Stolas- there we are, now, I'll arrange for our security. Via- security for a theme park. Stolas- were rich and we're hot, people want our money and our bodies. Via- our money maybe. Daren- no, I agree with him, I know people drool over you. Via- " EVEN MORE RED". Stolas- now I'm calling the only man who can #&$# me. I do a spit take, loonas eyes go wide and via drops her cereal. Via/loona/daren- WHAT. Stolas- Who can protect me, us, being part of the geoitia family is rather important. Via groans as she hugs me. Stolas- well hello my big dicked blitzy. Everyone- " SPIT TAKE. Everyone- WHAT THE FUCK STOLAS/DAD. Stolas- language, everyone. I groan as stolas talks to blitz, we walk out and wait for blitz, he pulls up in a few minutes, I had repaired the van, it now looked brand new with no dents, a upgraded engine and a air fresher, blitz and the others decked out in suits and glasses open the doors as we hop in. Blitz- NO HORNY.
