The day went on as usual. I was waiting for Damiano since he said we will probably see eachother, but he didn't show up.
'Miss Sorn, you ok?' asked Vic entering the shop.
'Oh yeah, of course' I said and hugged her.
'Was the tall hot brunette here today?' she laughed.
'Actually no, he and his girlfriend broke up.'
'So you have a chance, shoot your shot, bitch!' she laughed and I scoffed.
I said goodbye and went straight home. It was Monday, so it was a very busy day. I was drained mentally, first of all, from all the stress that Wanda brought up on me.
I entered my apartament and heard voices. This can't be real.
'Heeey, Sorn!' said Thomas and waved at me, but my attention was towards Damiano who was sitting next to him.
'Hi!' he greeted me.
'Yeah.. hi.. how are you?' I asked him.
'I'm good, how are you?' he asked grinning.
'Good. How did Wanda react last night?'
His face got all serious, kinda guilty. He thought for a second before starting to talk again.
'It was ok' he said. Oh wow, now he's the one hiding things from me.
'Ok in what sense?' I asked and sat in front of him. Thomas didn't pay much attention, he was on his phone.
'We made up' he whispered.
'Oh- I didn't expect you to forgive her like that' I said trying to remain calm.
'I just- I love her, I can't leave her like that' he continued whispering.
'Would you mind talking in private?' I asked. It was just weird talking while Thomas was there.
He nodded and we stood up. We went in my room. Thank god I made my bed this morning. He took a look at my room and sat on the bed.
'It's a cool room. I like the little crystal altar' he giggled.
'Thanks' I smiled and sat besides him.
'So.. about Wanda..' he started.
'I don't get you.' I said. I needed to be truthful to him, even though everything was a big lie after all.
'What do you mean?' he asked and raised an eyebrow.
'She cheated on you. Ins't that enough for you to break up with her?'
He didn't say anything. I was positive that Wanda talked it out the night before, manipulating him. Last night he was so confident in himself and now he acted totally different.
'She's really sorry..' he whispered.
Seven months ago when I first met him, I would have never thought his relationship was like this. It looked so perfect on the outside. Turns out it wasn't like this at all.
'She is sorry... She knew what she was doing and she knew it will hurt you, but that didn't stop her.'
'I really love her' he continued spacing out.
'Of course you do. That's not an excuse either to continue a toxic relationship.'
'We're not toxic! he snapped. Just because she saw another man doesn't mean she doesn't love me! After all it's just sex!'
I looked at him and analyzed him once more. He looked scared. I get that, he didn't want to lose the woman he loved.
'You do you, Damiano. I'm just telling you that this isn't normal and healthy.'
'I'll see what I'll do. I will see how she treats me after this. I'll go home now, it's late.' he said standing up.
'It's like 3pm what do you mean?'
'She said she wants me home at 4, so we can have lunch together.. She doesn't know I'm here.' he continued.
'Yeah, I bet she'd be mad as fuck right? Because you're not allowed to see friends that aren't controled by her.' I said without thinking first.
'She thinks we're more than friends' he whispered.
'Well, I don't know what makes her think that I'd ever be with a man who is in a relationship.'
He smiled a little and left my room. I heard him tell Thomas goodbye and then leave the apartament.
I never understood these kind of people, but at the same time I did. I was in this position, but not with a boyfriend, with my father actually. I was blinded by the father-daughter perfect relationship that we faked that I didn't see all the trauma he was actually implying to me and my mother.
But Damiano was just so clueless. It hurt seeing a friend in this situation and now I knew how his girlfriend actually was. What the fuck does Damiano see in her?
I did the only thing that kept me on track: write.
22.06.2021
Wanda was at my flower shop today. I could feel the insecurity and paranoia that controlled her. Damiano forgave her. He deserves someone better, someone that loves him. It's weird. I feel homesick without him.
unconditionally, Sorn
Homesick? I don't know why this word came in my mind. Maybe I was homesick for him. All these months I tried to figure out how he lived such a perfect life, now all I felt was pity.
Thomas entered my room and I hide my diary under my pillow.
'What?' I asked.
'What's the deal with Damiano and his girl?'
'I don't know and I don't care.' I lied. I did know and I did care.
'You keep saying this, but even you know you care. Can I help?'
'You can help me by being true to yourself and to me. Always.'
'What the hell, he laughed. You sound so dumb, Sorn. You know that I'm always telling you everything.'
'I know, sorry. I don't want you to change after highschool.' I hugged him.
'I will never change anything when it comes to us.' he smiled.
God, I wish Thomas doesn't end up so in love with a girl that keeps hurting him. Or a boy. However, I just want him to live a normal and healthy life.
tadaaa 🙈 stay safe besties🤍
