Give Me Love

Chapter 6

Ally's POV:

I'm sick of being sad.

Most importantly I'm sick of being made sad by the people I care the most about.

I shouldn't be mad at Connor. He didn't know dad would abuse me. I should have thought about how he felt about the whole situation. But I can't help feeling like I should be mad at him because I was sad too. I should have had someone to comfort me after my moms death. But no, instead I got made fun of for having a dead mother.

Maybe I should talk to Connor.

That's what I'll do.

I get my keys.

"Guys I'm going out for a while. Be back later!" I yell to Izzy and Alyssa.

They both come running down the stairs.

"Where are you going?" They both ask in unison.

I'm going to the boys house.

They both look at each other.

"Can we go?" Izzy asks.

"I guess."

"Yay!" Alyssa yells.

"Let's go."

-skip drive-

I know on the door.

Ricky answers and he's looks surprised.

"Sorry. I would have texted but I don't have your number."

"No it's fine. Just wasn't expecting to see you again tonight." He replies.

I didn't even realize he wasn't wearing a shirt until I found myself staring.

"Take a picture, it lasts longer." He comments then winks.

I find my self blushing and mumble a sorry.

"We'll come in." He says.

We all enter the house and he closes the door.

I'm getting nervous but I need to do this.

"Is Connor here?" I ask.

"Actually no. He left a while ago. He should be back soon. I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing."

I'm not really sure either.

"What was that?" He asks.

I must have said that out loud.

"It was nothing. Don't worry." I say with a smile.

"Okay" he replies with a smile.

"The rest of the boys are in the living room." Ricky tells us.

Izzy and Alyssa walk into the other room and I turn around to follow them but Ricky grabs my wrist.

I wince but I don't think he noticed. Good.

"Ally can I talk to you?" He asks.

"Umm sure." I say.

He leads me to the kitchen so we can talk in private.

"Are you okay?" He asks

"What do you mean?" I ask kinda confused.

"You seem a little upset about Connor showing up. Do you wanna talk about it?" He asks.

"Umm-"

"I mean you don't have to. But I just want you to know that I'm hear if you ever need someone to talk to." He says with a smile.

"You don't even know how much that means to me Ricky. I can't tell you now but give it time." I reply

"Okay." He says

We walk back inside and I see Connor on the couch.

It's now or never.

"Hey Connor can I talk to you?" I ask.

He and the rest of the people in the house look surprised.

"Sure."

He stands up and leads me to his room.(A/N I know Connor lives on his own but for the sake of the story he still lives with Kian Jc and Ricky.)

"What's up?" He asks kind of hesitantly.

"I thought about it and I don't think it's far of me to be mad at you for reasons you don't know about."

"Okay."

"After mom died and you left dad started drinking."

I look at him and he looks down.

"He became abusive. To this day he hasn't gone a day without getting drunk. He beat me Connor and you left when I need you most. Nobody was there for me after moms death. I got bullied. I was know at school as the kid with a dead mom. People made fun of me. People beat me up, called me names. Then when I came home I got the same treatment but from my own father. It was a never ending cycle. And you left as soon as it got tough. I needed you Connor and you were here!" I was starting to get mad again.

I didn't even realize I was crying till I felt teardrops on my hand.

I looked up at Connor and he was crying too.

"I needed someone and nobody was there! You never called! You never texted! I didn't even know if you were still alive! And how do you think it feels when you see me and don't even know who I am! You forgot about me Connor! My own brother forgot about my existence! It's like you never even cared about me! I started cutting! I had no one!" And then I lost it. I feel to my knees and cried.

Connor rushed over to me and hugged me but I didn't want a hug from him.

"Ally please! I'm sorry! Do you know how much I hate myself for leaving you!" I look up at him.

Tears were streaming down his face.

He took my wrist and pulled my sleeve up.

He gasped and cried even harder.

"Ally I'm sorry."

Then I hugged him.

I hugged my brother for the first time in years.

"I can't say I forgive you because it takes time. But show me you care and I will eventually trust you again."

"I can do that." He says.

We try to make it look like we weren't crying then we go down stairs.

I can say for the first time in a long time I think I'm happy. But that makes me scared, because nothing good lasts long.