meant to be | j. parker¹

TWENTY-TWO

A family group therapy session was not how two out of three Baker siblings wanted to spend their day. With Jordan's recent news of fatherhood and Aaliyah just not wanting to sit down with a therapist and talk about her feelings the two were just not in the mood to be there. "Love guards the heart from the abyss. That's Mozart. And the love you all have for each other is why you're committed to making this family whole again. Step one, healing as a unit," Dr. Gibbs started off looking around at the Baker family.

"And how many steps are there?" Jordan plainly asked. "This isn't AA. There's not a finish line we can just skip ahead to," Liv told him.

Dr. Gibbs nodded her head in agreement. "Olivia's right. The healing time is different for every family."

"We're all in. For rebuilding this family. Whatever it takes," Billy spoke out, looking around the room at his children and wife. "Laura, Aaliyah? Is he right? Are you all in?" Dr. Gibbs asked looking at the two women who were sitting near each other quietly.

"Uh...I'm here," Laura sighed. "That's all I have for you right now." Aaliyah gave the therapist a soft smile nodding in agreement with her mother. "Yeah, what she said."

"Honestly...I miss my family and I'm hoping therapy can help us get back to a healthy place. Helped me in the past, so..." Liv started off. Billy quickly rose his hand after her signaling his turn. "Um...when my family looks at me now, I, uh, I can feel their disappointment. I deserve it and I know that. I guess I'm hoping that one day soon, they'll be able to look at me like they used to and we can start finding our way back to happiness."

"Except I don't know that being happy translates to you and mom staying together. Maybe it means you don't," Jordan spoke up looking at his parents. "I completely agree," Aaliyah sighed looking up from her lap. "Look, mom cries in the shower at night, even when she thinks that we can't hear her. And Dad? You can't let go of your guilt. From where I'm sitting, you both look terrible, and being around each other isn't helping either one of you."

"Thank you for sharing, you two," Dr. Gibbs said looking at Aaliyah and Jordan.

"I guess, it's my turn," Laura said taking a deep breath. "I am tired of living my life on hold and as soon as this therapy or whatever is over, I would like all of us to be able to move on."

"With or without me?" Billy asked her.

✯✯✯

"I can't believe she gave us homework. You happy now?" Jordan scoffed looking down at his poorly drawn sketch of the family that he had done. "I'm all for unconventional methods if it gets the job done," Liv told him. "That woman is getting paid $200 an hour, okay, and the best thing she can come up with was to make us draw stupid pictures of what our family actually looks like versus what our family feels like?" Jordan complained.

"What do you care? It's not your money," Aaliyah retorted looking up from her sketch consisting of mainly stick figures. "Well, in that case, I say we go, Lord of the Flies, with no parents, less people to draw, no curfews, right?" Jordan encouraged.

"You do realize you're about to have a kid with a girl you barely know. Might want to take this more seriously," Liv told him.

"Let me see your sketch," Jordan inquired, hovering his face right above the notepad Aaliyah was drawing on. "It's just stick figures. Go crazy," she sighed picking it up and handing it to him while her eyes wandered over to her sister's sketch. "Woah, have you seen Liv's? She's definitely the artistic one out of the three of us," she mumbled admiring the drawing.

"Thank you," Liv said startling the two once she walked back into her room and picked a sketchbook out from her bedside table, and showing the two her sketches. "While I was at rehab, I did art therapy. It was the one thing I could do to communicate how I was actually feeling."

"How did I not know you were this talented? Okay, so what's your artistic take on what our family feels like? Woah! Wait. Why aren't we in your family picture? I mean, we both drew stick figures," Jordan softly said pointing at Aaliyah who was just as shocked looking at her sketch. "But at least we made family portraits, Liv."

"It just feels like you two are missing from my life a lot of the time," Liv admitted.

"What are you talking about? We're right here, Liv," Aaliyah said.

"Growing up, we were best friends, all three of us. Dad was always on the road and mom worked long hours, but it didn't matter because we had each other. And when dad came home after he retired, you two abandoned me. Jordan started playing football. Aaliyah became a cheerleader, and the two of you made new friends who were coincidentally the same group of friends. But, it kind of seemed like you guys didn't need me anymore," Liv explained.

"Liv...look," Jordan sighed sitting down on her bed and joining the two sisters on there. "Yeah. Okay, when dad came home I started focusing on football. I mean both of you always had this special daddy's girl bond and I didn't have anything even close to that with him. So, yeah. I threw myself into football to bond with dad, but...I wasn't trying to shut you out. Besides, you...you had your whole new group of friends and doing your partying thing, and I just assumed that's what you wanted and left you alone."

"I only joined cheer because all of you had something. Jordan was playing football," Aaliyah softly chuckled looking at the two. "...Liv was doing the whole partying thing. And I wanted something, so, I joined cheer...and then, joining cheer I ended up being in this weird friend group with Jordan. I never realized that it seemed like we were abandoning you. I feel like we only just got close after you came back from rehab, and I'm sorry."

"This is gonna sound stupid and selfish," Liv sighed taking a sharp deep breath in. "Say it, anyway," Jordan told her. "I just—I feel like...I just feel like I'm finally getting you two back. But, with the baby coming now, I mean, you're starting a whole new family with Simone, which is exactly what you should be doing. I'm just...I'm just afraid I'm gonna lose you again," Liv admitted mainly looking at Jordan.

"Hey..." Jordan sighed picking up both of his sister's hands. "You're not gonna lose me."

"Us," Aaliyah corrected looking at Liv.

2x07