Bound in Love

Chapter 25

His heart twisted and sunk with nerves as he stood in front of the window of the hospital's waiting room. They had taken her to The Swedish Bainbridge because it was the closest hospital to her parent's place and Millie worked there. As the image of Ellie falling lifeless in his arms replayed repeatedly in his mind, his whole body shook. It hasn't stopped shaking since they left her parent's house. His heart was pounding so hard against his ribcage as his pulse pressed outward, jerking the veins within. His breaths came in sharp pants. It hurt. It hurt too much for him to handle it. Too much for him to endure. Until then, the thought of losing her never crossed his mind and that morning the universe showed him how fragile a life can be. Ellie was fine and then, suddenly, she wasn't and that crushed him in a way he had yet experienced. He had lost Andy and that had been a very hard blow but Ellie... the thought was excruciating. As he gazed outside and the sun still pierced his eyes, his hands began to shake again and tears invaded his eyes. He had lost the count of the times he had cried since the event and it didn't even matter for he couldn't even control it. Another torrent of silent tears streamed down his face as he faced the small garden outside. Some parents were playing with their children in the swings. A child laughed uncontrollably as her father pushed her and that made him think of his own daughter and how he wanted to able to do that one day. To make his child laugh that way. Chris took his hands to his face and cleaned his tears. He passed them on his face about three times in a row to make sure it was dry. Then, he shook his head and turned around to face Brooke, Millie and Frank, his father-in-law.

"Why are they taking so long?" He asked choking in his crying. His eyes were so swollen and so inflamed and his lips trembled as he spoke.

"Chris, you should sit down a little." Millie told him. "Come on, sweetheart." She insisted tapping on the blue leather chair next to hers for he hadn't had a single second of resting since he got there.

She had been the one assisting Ellie while waiting for the ambulance to arrive. While being a doctor, she had, sadly, lost many patients, but she had never been faced with the possibility of losing a daughter. It was with shaken hands and tears rolling down her face that she checked Ellie's pulse and she will always remember the relief that invaded her the moment she felt a steady pulse.

"I can't sit." He told her, walking around in circles again.

For the million time, he was walking around the room with arms crossed around his chest. His heavy breathing was heard inside the space for no one was talking. The silence was unbearably loud. His heavy steps echoing inside it as he stepped on the floor was the only thing heard and also his chokes as he tried to sustain his crying and his despair. After a few round a bounds, he came to a halt and wrapped his hands at the back of his head and stared at the white ceiling taking deep breaths. He was suffocating... he was lost and numb and desperate.

"Can't you go there?" He turned to Millie again. Then, he approached her. "Millie... she is inside for hours and no one came here to tell us anything." Chris claimed. "I mean..." His blue eyes searched for hers. Ellie looked so much like her mother. "... what if something happened meanwhile... go there, please." He pleaded and ripping her heart in tiny pieces.

"They don't let me in." Millie told him. "Chris..." She breathed but he cut her off right there.

He didn't want to listen to anyone anymore. He wants news. He wanted to know how Ellie and his daughter were doing. He needed to know or he would go insane.

"You work here!" Chris yelled, losing his mind for a second.

"But Ellie is my daughter and it is policy that we cannot assist our relatives." Millie tried to reason him, but she was barely keeping herself sitting quietly anymore. "Chris..." She called him but he looked away from her as if refusing her answer.