Slipping Through My Fingers

Chapter Ten

Chapter 10

Rosalie's POV -

Since I've never had to go to an art classroom, I actually had no idea where they were. From what I knew, the twins weren't with me and instead they both had a free period. I didn't know where I was going and every minute I was late, I began to become more and more frustrated.

Finally, after what seemed like forever, I found a sign that led to the art department and followed along until I found a bunch of classrooms. I found the one I was supposed to be in and walked inside, trying to stay quiet just in case the teacher hadn't noticed that I still hadn't come in.

As soon as I raised my head, I looked around for a seat which so happened to be next to Nate.

Wait... Nate?

His presence surprised me, making me trip over my own feet and stumble on to the floor. The class erupted into laughter and I picked myself up, feeling my cheeks redden in embarrassment. I caught Nate's eye and he was laughing at me, his eyes twinkling in amusement.

I grumbled as I made my way to the seat next to Nate and sat down with a huff.

"That was funny." He laughed when I sat down.

I tried my best not to roll my eyes seeing that I still hadn't fully recovered from my sickness two days ago.

"You know what I've noticed?" He continued after I ignored his remark.

I looked at him, showing him that he had my attention.

"You're really clumsy." He stated and laughed again.

This time, I had to roll my eyes. It didn't hurt like it would have a few days ago but it did cause me to have a little head rush.

"I'm not clumsy; I was just doing my random gravity checks. Looks like I'll have to alert the astronauts about this one." I joked.

Nate smirked and rolled his eyes.

"Gravity checks? Looks like it's a full time job for you if you're always on the floor." He laughed at his own comment.

"Yep, the pay is good so I thought; why not check the floors often?" I replied nonchalantly.

"So, about this job, you reckon I can get in on it?" He asked me as if he were being really serious.

"Yeah, probably." I grinned.

"Good," He smirked. "But make sure that the astronauts give us the same shifts and we can work together, that way, I can fall before you and have you land on my body." He winked.

I immediately felt my face heat up at his remark and my eyes went wide. I opened my mouth to say something but nothing came out. I really wasn't used to anyone saying things like that to me and I guess he just took me by surprise.

"You should see your face right now!" He boomed in laughter.

It took all my willpower not to blush again because if I blushed anymore, a tomato would probably look pale in comparison to my state.

"It's not funny." I muttered.

Apparently, saying 'it's not funny' made it all the more funny because Nate erupted into continuous laughter once again. Everyone looked towards him, their smiles showing that they were amused by his laugh and a little... surprised?

A few seconds later, the teacher decided to walk in with some sort of camera in her hands and a creepy grin.

"Okay, so today I've decided that we'll start off with photography instead of visual arts. We'll start off with the basics seeing as everyone's history with photography isn't too great. We'll be going into the dark room for photographic film and in there I'll discuss with everyone why we use the dark room and whatnot. Before we begin, I suggest everyone leave their phones on their desks because any form of light will ruin the work. Take a camera from inside the tray and follow me." The teacher announced as she walked around the room, eying us questionably.

Everyone nodded and dug their hands into their pockets to retrieve their phones and leave in on the desks. I watched as Nate pulled out his iPhone, checked the screen, and put it back in his pocket.

I frowned at his little rebel act.

"Aren't you going to put it on the desk?" I asked him.

"And have someone steal it on their way out?" He scoffed. "I think not. And how about you little rebel, you're not going to take out your phone?"

I suddenly became very interested in the little mark on the tiles below me.

"Um, I don't have a phone so, nope." I mumbled, not meeting his gaze.

This was a school where the students owned phones when they were infants. They probably had the latest technology whenever they wanted, and lived in a mansion with an endless supply of money, with no responsibilities whatsoever. My life however was the complete opposite, I didn't even own a phone, I lived in a one bedroom apartment with no money left over for me and had the most responsibility.

"Shit." He muttered. "So when you said you were poor you like, fully meant it, ha?"

I raised my eyebrows at his choice of words and frowned.

"Technically, I never said I was poor." I said.

"Please." He scoffed. "I've seen your apartment - you're definetly poor."

His words were... well, they stung. I thought I had developed some sort of friendship with Nate and he even confirmed my thoughts a couple of days ago, so I was quite surprised when he was being so blunt about my wealth and social status within society.

I bit back my tongue, not wanting to say anything mean. Unlike some people, I knew what it meant to be courteous and polite.

"Okay, I didn't mean to say it like that, but yeah, you get what I mean." Nate spoke after a few seconds of uncomfortable silence.

I smiled up at him, feeling slightly happy that he knew he said something he shouldn't have and even though he didn't directly apologise, I wouldn't scold him for his mistake.

"I get what you mean. It's fine." I brushed him off with a smile.

He nodded and looked somewhat relieved.

"So, this dark room, it's not actually dark is it?" I asked Nate as we walked through the doorway after taking a camera.

"No, it's actually extremely lighted." He rolled his eyes.

I didn't know if he was being sarcastic or not but I strongly hoped the latter because my fears about being in the dark were to a point where I could actually have a phobia for it. The memories about what my father did to me were too scary to ever be back in the dark.

Nate and I were one of the first people in front of the line so we were the first few people to actually enter the dark room. I wondered why they called it the dark room if it was the complete opposite... Must be because of the history behind it or something.

We waited for everyone to enter and when they did, the door shut and the teacher started reciting the instructions of what we were to do in here. She kept saying 'when the lights go out' however I just assumed that there would be coloured lights or something.

So, when she counted down from three to one and the lights went completely out, you can imagine how terrified I was.

There wasn't a single fleck of light inside; the natural light that would usually come from under the door was also completely blocked off, making everything non-visible.

I started to panic as soon as I realised that the lights were out. Everything around me was dark. I felt like puking straight away, not being able to handle the dimness.

I started having flashbacks of what my father would do to me. He'd take me to an empty room, he'd tie my hands up so I couldn't fight back and after making sure that even the moons reflection provided no light, he would take off his belt and hit me time and time again.

I would yell, scream and shout, hoping that maybe he or my mother would gain some compassion and help me but nothing happened except for the pain becoming stronger. He mainly targeted my lower back and after so many times of being whipped, permanent scars were left on my back. Whenever I accidentally landed in the dark, I somehow felt the same pain as I usually would when my father was there and whipped me and the pain would be so strong, I'd end up puking.

"No!" A startled shriek escaped my throat.

The bridge of my nose started becoming tingly; my personal sign of saying that tears were to pour out any minute. I felt like the walls had closed in on me, making me feel claustrophobic. I moved around, trying to find some way to escape but I kept on bumping into bodies.

My screams either didn't make it out or were being drowned out by the sounds of people talking and laughing with one another because no one seemed to hear me or pay any attention.

"Please move. Someone please help me." I murmured to myself, wiping the tears away with one hand while I pushed through the bodies with my other hand.

"Boo!" A familiar voice yelled, grabbing my shoulders and making me jump.

"No! Please don't hurt me!" I yelled subconsciously, still in tears.

For a second, everyone was quiet making my fears accelerate to a whole new level.

"Please don't hurt me." I murmured over and over again, wiping away the tears that wouldn't stop swimming down my cheeks.

I heard Nate's laugh from right next to me as he pulled me closer to him.

"Aw, is little Rosie afraid of the dark?" He cooed.

His tone was unsettling, making my breaths short, on the verge of hyperventilation. Our proximity only reminded me of the whip and it didn't help that Nate's hand was on the exact same spot where my scars were.

"Don't touch me!" I yelled without realisation.

I closed my eyes, choking on a sob for a second.

"Hey Rose, I'm only messing around..." Nate's voice came closer again and I felt like if I didn't see light, I would faint.

"Please, don't come any closer." I cried.

I felt someone's arms on my shoulders and I knew they didn't belong to Nate... somehow, I just knew it wasn't him.

I yelled and jumped up, landing against Nate's body. For some reason, I was able to identify Nate in the darkness; I just knew when it was him and when it wasn't. When Nate touched me, I was startled, when someone else touched me, I could have had a panic attack.

Nate's hands went to my head and pulled me to his chest in an embrace.

"Rose, are you alright?" He asked me, his voice soft and filled with worry.

Our proximity was calming but I still couldn't breathe and was deadly afraid.

"Let me go. I need to leave. Please." I cried harder.

The voice of my father came into my head as if he were whispering in my ear. He was whispering the things that he would whisper to me when I was young. He would talk about how worthless I was and how I didn't treat my parents right. The vulgar and explicit language he would use would frighten me, causing me to shake for days.

As I attempted to push myself away from Nate's embrace, I felt as if my dad was telling me all those things again and whip me like he used to.

"Stop hurting me." I continued to sob. "Leave me alone."

Everyone was talking all at once and it made me feel dizzy, as if everyone was next to me and wanted to hurt me.

"Rose, I'm not hurting you." I heard Nate's agonized voice however even though he still held my hand, his voice was distant.

"Let me go..." I continued to sob.

Finally, I found that the room was getting brighter and brighter. Slowly and with as much anticipation that I could withhold, I stood up from where I had fallen down after Nate let go of my hand and rushed to where I found the door. The door was bringing in the natural light from outside however I wondered why no one bothered to turn the lights on in the room.

It was a struggle to stand up since I felt physically and mentally sick.

"Rose, where are you going?!" I heard Nate scream some more but I wasn't focussed on what he was saying; more like getting out of the darkness that I felt was choking me.

I ran as fast I could, up and away from everywhere. I couldn't handle darkness; it made me feel faint and sick. I stretched my legs as I ran and headed out of the art section and towards the large area of grass. As I ran across the grass, I tripped over and landed with my stomach down across the grass.

I bleakly picked myself up and walked slowly towards the edge of the grass where I sat down with my legs crossed and stared out into the thin air letting my tears flow as they pleased.

Whenever I was actually put into the dark, everything around me seemed threatening and reminded me of the way my father used to tie me and relentlessly belt me. Some nights were worse than others. Usually when I wouldn't eat much because I needed to keep food for my brothers, I would be reminded of my living condition.

Sometimes, when I received a huge bill in the mail that I knew would take work to pay off; I would stress myself out to the point of hyperventilation. This situation however, this whole thing was a different story. My living condition was one thing but the permanent scars on my back that made me reminisce the way my father would abuse me made me feel weak as if I were eight years old and he was doing it to me again.

Slowly, I started to regain my breath back and my tears slowly stopped. I used my hand to wipe away the last straying tears and took a deep breath.

"...Rose, why aren't you answering me?" I heard the familiar voice so close to me.

I jumped from where I was sitting and glanced over to see a worried Nate staring at me, hopelessness crossing his perfect features.

"Were you talking to me?" I asked after I managed to find my voice.

"I chased you outside the room and watched you trip, fall and sit down and mumble to yourself. What the hell is going on?" His voice showed signs of being sympathetic; something that I hadn't heard from Nate before.

I shook my head slowly and squeezed my eyes shut. I was surprised when the bridge of my nose felt tingly again and my eyes started to once again water up.

"Nothing." I mumbled, feeling numb.

"Don't you dare think you're going to get away with saying nothing. F*ck, you're scaring me Rose." He almost shouted.

The vulgar word he used was said at such a bad time. Usually, it wouldn't bother me but after a time like this... I shuddered.

"Please don't swear." I mumbled weakly.

I couldn't look at him. I kept my eyes on the pieces of stray grass lying on top of one another. I felt Nate's fingers touch my chin and put my head up so my eyes were locked with his. His expression softened, maybe thinking I was some poor, little weak girl.

"I'm sorry." He said confidently. "I will not swear but, can you please tell me why you were so scared back then?"

His hand was still under my chin and at first I thought it was shaking until I realised that it was actually me who was quivering.

"Please, I don't want to say anything." I felt like another sob was to come and if I held it back, I'd choke on it.

I brought up my hands and brushed away his hand that was under my chin. I covered my face with my hands, not wanting to humiliate myself further.

"Will you tell me about it after?" He asked me slowly.

I shook my head and heard him swear under his breath. I subconsciously flinched at what he said and he made a quick apology.

"Rose, I am going to take you to my house. I will call Adam and tell him to pick up your brothers. You will have a shower and sleep for a while. When you wake up, you will tell me what happened." He stated confidently.

My feeling of numbness over powered everything else I was feeling. I couldn't reply or change my facial expression to show him I was grateful or anything. I felt like I was paralysed from head to toe, unable to do anything. I was basically the definition of a stunned mullet.

"Rose?" Nate pressed.

Another blank response on my behalf.

"I'm taking you now." He said.

I watched as he stood up and took me by my arms and helped me up. We both started walking however I was leaning on Nate mostly, and he was supporting most of my weight.

He took me to the parking lot and helped me into his car, putting the seatbelt on and softly closing the passenger door. Nate was in his seat quickly and drove at a frightening speed towards his house but I was too disoriented to care or say anything at that moment.

The car stopped in his driveway and I turned to my side a little and tried opening the door. I attempted to push the door open again when I failed the first time and after I still couldn't open the door, I sat back in my seat, giving up. I felt my fingers shaking vigorously and didn't know how to stop it.

Very quickly, the door opened up and Nate helped me out of the car and walked me through the door. I knew his house was grandly supreme. I looked around, barely moving my neck and took in my surroundings. It was beautiful.

I heard Nate speaking and at first I thought he was talking to me until I heard a feminine voice talking too. My eyes suddenly felt heavy and I fought to keep them open.

"Rose, do you want to have a shower now?" He asked me.

I managed to shake my head a little, barely signifying that I didn't want to take a shower.

"That's fine, I'll take you up to my room." He told me but by then, my eyes were closed and I couldn't stand up for any longer. I finally slipped out of consciousness.

***

Fear.

It was the first emotion I felt when I woke up. I couldn't remember where I was or previous events. And then with the thudding pain in my head came the day's events. I remembered everything.

Which then led me to humiliation. How could I have acted that way in front of Nate? I felt a migraine forming and I placed my fingers to the back of my head where I massaged myself quickly.

I looked around me and saw that I was lying down on a big bed in a room. The wall was painted navy and was perfectly clean and in the centre of the room, was a large bed pushed against the wall. There were two nightstands on either side of the bed, one was empty and the other had an alarm clock and a lamp.

On my right was a large mahogany desk with a laptop and a few papers scattered around. Across from the bed was a huge borderless TV that was hung up on the wall. On the left side of the room, there was a wooden fence with a small gate that allowed you to enter the space where Nate was sitting.

He was surrounded by a pool table, a foosball table and a TV cabinet that held another huge TV, an Xbox, a Wii and a PlayStation. There were a bunch of colourful bean bags thrown around the side of the room and Nate was sitting on one of them while he played BlackOps.

I smiled at the sight and watched as he softly swore while he played. He died and the game finished and in one quick movement, Nate stood up, threw his controller on the bean bag and turned the Xbox off before looking my way. Surprise flashed across his features until he finally smirked.

"I see you're finally awake." He commented.

"Yeah." I mumbled, feeling my voice hoarse.

"Do you know how to play BlackOps?" He asked me, acting very nonchalant.

I was confused by his attitude... doesn't he remember everything that happened? I frowned in confusion and nodded slowly.

"Yeah, Adam and I play it a lot." I replied.

He nodded and grinned.

"Okay, take a shower and we'll play a few games, okay?" It was a question but I didn't think he was giving me any choice in the answer.

"Um, okay." I mumbled.

"I think my brother's fiancé left a few of her clothes here, I'll just get you a pair of jeans and you can borrow my sweater. Is that alright?" He cocked his head to the side, making him look unbelievably cute.

"It's fine." I murmured.

He led me to his very own personal bathroom and handed me a towel.

"I'll leave the clothes on my bed, okay?"

I nodded and he left his room, shutting the door behind me.

Had I imagined everything that had happened or was Nate just acting... normal? Why was he acting so nonchalant about everything? I practically bawled my eyes out in front of him and acted like a lunatic yet here he was just being so... normal.

I walked inside the bathroom and slid the door shut. I took off my school skirt followed by my stockings, jumper, blouse and underwear. I didn't plan on not wearing my bra and panties so I took them off and left them to the side while I slid into the shower.

I put the hot water on without the cold, and stayed under the water for twenty minutes before taking out the shampoo and cleansing my hair. I used the lavender lotion that Nate had given me before I went inside and lathered myself up before washing out my conditioner. After I cleaned myself, I stayed under the water for what felt like forever.

Finally, after I felt the hot water running out, I turned the water off and dried myself off with the towel. I put my bra and panties on and wrapped my hair up in the towel. I slid the bathroom door open and found a pair of denim skinny jeans and a black Call of Duty sweater sitting on the bed. I quickly dressed myself up, feeling self-conscious of the fact that Nate could walk in through the doors any second now.

I breathed in Nate's scent once the sweater was pulled over me. It smelled just like him, the woodsy yet cologne taste that was all naturally belonging to him.

"Can I come in?" I heard Nate ask when he slightly opened the door.

"Yeah, come in." I replied.

My mood had slightly increased for the better and I no longer felt sticky and claustrophobic.

"Hey," Nate winked with a smirk. "You look hot in my jumper."

I felt myself blush and slapped my hands to my cheeks in embarrassment. Nate chuckled and nodded over to the other side of his room where the games were set up.

"You owe me some answers you know." He told me after we sunk into the same bean bag.

I tried to reach the other bean bag but Nate refused and made me share with him.

"Yup." I answered, pretending not to care that I had to share something from my past with him.

"Okay, but we'll make it interesting. Every time I kill you, I ask a question, every time you kill me; you get to ask me a question. Deal?" Nate asked.

"Deal." I grinned.

We set up a game and we were straight into it. Nate killed me almost as soon as the game started.

"What is your favourite colour?" He asked.

I did a double take when he asked that. That was not the kind of question I thought he'd ask.

"Um... pink." I answered.

He snickered and I used this to my advantage, getting a quick kill.

"What's your favourite colour?" I questioned.

"Blue probably. But I don't really have a favourite colour." He answered smoothly.

"Come on, you have to have a colour that you favour more than others." I told him.

"Yeah, that's blue. But colours don't bother me."

I rolled my eyes at his reply and whilst doing that, he killed me.

"What's your favourite kind of food?"

"Chicken an veal." I answered and took another shot. "What's yours?"

"Any kind of meat." He shrugged.

We were silent for a few moments, the only sounds coming from the TV and Nate cussing under his breath when I dodged a bullet.

"Yes! Got you!" He cheered when he finally shot me. "Okay, next question, what kind of flowers do you like?"

"Any kinds. I love Roses, pretty ironic since it's my name, but I also love orchids and tulips."

"What are your favourite kinds of sweets?" Nate killed me again, earning himself another question.

"Raspberry shortcakes!" I chirped gleefully.

He laughed and killed me again.

"Are you a virgin?"

The question caught my off guard, allowing him another question.

"W-what?" I asked in embarrassment.

He laughed loudly and bumped shoulders with me.

"Aw, don't be shy. Just tell me, are you a virgin?" He asked.

"Y-yes. I am." I answered in extreme quietness.

He laughed again and I buried myself deep in the bean bags, in complete embarrassment.

"Um, have you ever dated anyone?" He asked.

The questions were getting more personal which meant that he was soon going to get to today's events.

"Nope." I finally killed him. "How many siblings do you have?"

"Two brothers. Me and Ashton are close though and Brandon is finishing up college in California so we don't see him as much." He seemed fond of his brothers just like I was fond of mine.

Nate and I were close and tried shooting each other but the trap that I put in place killed both of us.

"Ha, that means I get to ask you something!" He cheered.

"No it doesn't!" I argued. "The trap killed me, therefore killing myself. The rules were you could ask me a question if you personally killed me."

"No, the rules were every time you died I got to ask a question!" He retorted.

"No!"

"Yes!"

"Fine, one question each. I go first." I scolded. "When is your birthday?"

It was a pretty simple question but I didn't know what else to ask.

"September." He answered quickly. "Now my turn."

For some reason, I knew he was going to start getting into today's events.

"Tell me about everything that happened today."

And that's when I felt my face pale.

------------------------------------

Authors Note:

Pretty intense, well the start/middle was anyways. I felt awkward when I wrote it LOL. The whole time I was like 'Pfft what seventeen year old is afraid of the dark' Hahahah.

Vote, comment and fan.

Farewell xx