What Was Lost // (Harry Styles FanFic)

Chapter 32

Lilly's POV

    I didn't realize how hard it was going to be to not sneak into Sutter's room every night when he's right down the hall from me. When I lived here before, his parents used to let us sleep in the same bed because we had Annie, and there was no point in trying to stop us from having sex when we already had a child together, even if we were still extremely young. But even before we had Annie, Sutter spent most nights in my bed beside me, after scaling up the side of my house into my bedroom.

    So to say the temptation of having him so close, but not close enough, was starting to get to me was an understatement. I spent most of my nights with him in one of our rooms or the bonus rooms with Jo, and we would do homework and other things together after we all got out of practice. And then we'd end up in one of rooms, and we'd fool around, always getting each other off, but never the way I really wanted to. He seemed content to just keep it strictly at second and third base when I was swinging for a home run every time we were alone.

    We were falling into an easy and comfortable routine together, just like we had before. But it was different this time, we were older, and we'd gone through so many obstacles it was kinda hard to go back to the way we used to be, but we were also still the same. I'm not sure how to explain it, other than he still made me the happiest I'd ever been, but it was a different kind of happy than before.

    Other than the fact that we still hadn't had sex, and I was convinced he was making me wait just because he knew how badly I wanted him. He walked around the house barely dressed, and always smelling like he just came from shooting some damn cologne commercial.

    He made my mouth practically watering with need for him, and he knew it. He would always smirk at me or send me a playful smile if he noticed me staring at him.

    So what did I do?

    I started walking around my room naked, or in some bra and underwear sets that I knew would drive him crazy. Sutter always loved the color black on me for some reason, and he walked in on me in a skimpy lacey set last night.

    I was in the middle of telling Nadine all the details about it in 3rd period.

    "So he walks in the room, and of course I have my back facing him while I'm digging in my closet to find something to wear when he walks in."

    Her smile is just a devious as mine. "What did he do?"

    "I turned around all nonchalantly, and he had his mouth hanging open like a dog. I could tell he wanted to so bad Nadine, but then he just turned around and walked out of the room!"

    "Why?"

    "I have no idea, but it pissed me off. I know he wants us to take things slow, but this is ridiculous."

    "So is that why you asked me to pick you up this morning early?" She questions, knowing it was unusual for me to ask her to drive me to school when I usually ride with Sutter and Jo everyday.

    "Yep. I left before he even got up this morning too, but I let Jo know where I was so they wouldn't worry or anything."

    "Has he not tried to see you today?"

    "I'm sure, but I've been avoiding him. It's starting to make me feel like he doesn't want me with all of this holding off shit. Like he has some other reason for not wanting to be with me."

    Nadine's expression makes it clear that she doesn't agree with me. "I think you're just overthinking it, Lil. The boy has been attracted to you since he was practically in diapers, that hasn't changed."