Who wants to live a simple, carefree, happy life?
...me obviously...
but fate didn't seem to share the same goals as I do.
In fact, it was a disaster. One year had already passed and this guy didn't understand the meaning of 'Fuck off'.
He has been on my case since day one, god knows where he came from. A tall slender man in a red suit and constantly a creepy smile on his face, no one I wouldn't like to meet in the dark. But that wasn't the only weird thing about him, he is constantly followed by a red midget dressed up as a demon. At first I thought it was his child dressed up for Halloween. Even though it is December. I needed some time to process this, as well as getting the midget as a gift. I mean, who in their right mind gives a child as a present? It is hard to believe that this was the real deal. It turns out that this was indeed a real imp, called Sin. He has been the servant of this Overlord for decades and he was also the one that warned me about his master's evil plan. Thankfully I am not the only one that hates this creep.
Sascha, a good friend of the family doesn't like this guy either, finding him rather scary and disturbing. But we do accepted Sin as a good friend, since he kept me informed about his master's patience. I never thought that I was in real danger until now, as the year was about to come to an end.
At the same time, three other imps were also in the land of the living, doing their job.
Apparently, they were supposed to kill someone in house number 6 at my road. But instead, they arrived at my door, on house number 9. Don't ask me why they mixed up the numbers. Meanwhile, I wasn't aware of this unusual visit, minding my own business. Like most nights, I sit in my PJ in front of the TV and watch random bullshit, while stuffing my face with popcorn. That someone would ring at this time was uncalled for.
Too lazy to get my ass off the couch, I shouted for Sascha to go, "Door!"
Unfortunately, he had his headphones on full blast...
Maybe him, "Sin DOOR!"
...so did the imp, sitting next to my friend.
Assuming that it is not important to get there quickly and no one fucking cares to move, I dragged myself off the couch.M y movements were in slow motion, even a sloth would have been at the door by now.
On the other side, one Imp already prepared his shotgun, "Alright Moxxie, I will deal with this one, you stay the fuck out of my way. Mils will you be a dear and watch the backdoor for me?"
"Roger Blitz!"
The one referred to as Moxxie, a smaller imp with white hair and a bow tied around his neck, frowned deeply at that remark, "For the last time Sir, I was sorry! "
"Yeah, like the time you didn't let me fuck your wife?"
"What the hell?! When did you ask that?!!!"
The one with the shotgun, a tall, slender imp with a heart on his forehead, wiggled his eyebrows, "I didn't, I expected you to get the picture while we all lied in bed together."
Suddenly, the images of the night came back to him. Blitz, the tall Imp and the boss of Millie and Moxxie, took a liking to stalk his staff wherever they are, even when Mox wanted some private time with his wife. On that night, his boss crawled into their bed, lying between the couple and smiled wide at them both, "So...what do you usually do now?"
Moxxie couldn't take it anymore, "Will you just stop pestering us outside of work?!"
Blitz doesn't see the problem in that, "Just be grateful that your boss is a caring, sweet and nurturing type...did you forget that I made you employee of the month...twice..."
Moxxie's frowned deepened, murmuring to himself, "You never paid us properly and you insult us to your own enjoyment"
"What was that?"
"Nothing Sir"
"I hope so", the tall Imp didn't waste anytime on his employee that is giving him the finger behind his back, he was more focused on his next target. That is, if his 'target' would come to the door at some point, "For god sake, hurry up already!"
I wasn't even halfway there, not hearing the imp's complain, as something else has caught my attention. Some loud noise came from the kitchen. The sound worried me, everyone else in the house was upstairs. Forgetting the door entirely, my feet went from the corridor, towards the kitchen. It came from outside.Maybe one of them was thirsty...
"Sascha?...Sin?"
Meow!
False alarm, its just a stupid cat begging for something. Before could tell the feline to piss off, someone else beats me to it.
"Go away!"
Huh? That was odd, cats do not talk. Who the hell is at the backdoor? I leaned against the door. This female voice wasn't familiar. So just to be safe, I peek through the window above me, seeing a small creature with horns...and a knife in her hand. At first, I thought that it was some kind of a sick joke, until another one came over, looking similar to her, just like Sin, with a rifle.
He held up his finger to his face "Hey honey, no one is answering the door. I guess our target isn't at home."
What...target? I thought. What the hell is going on here?!
Since I wasn't bothered to turn on the lights in the kitchen and the light of the tv cannot be seen from this angle, I wouldn't be surprised for him to say that.
BANG!
But this surely caught me by surprise. This one came from the main door. Scared shitless by the gunshot, I hid inside the cupboard. Leaving a tiny gap, so I could see this tall creature holding a shot gun, turning on the lights. It didn't waste any time to let the others in, looking rather pissed off, "Did anyone leave this place?"
Millie shook her head, "No Sir"
"Where the fuck is that target?!"
"Probably not at home Sir"
Blitz pulled on to his employees face rather harshly, "Oh yeah, leaving while the TV is still on?! No...she got to be here somewhere..."
I had to calm myself down. I don't know who these freaks are but one thing I knew very well...I am not leaving this place while they are armed with weapons. Covering my mouth to prevent myself from breathing too hard, this tall one with the shot gun gestured towards the Livingroom.
"Alright folks, search every room, every god damn corner in this place, she's got to be here."
Moxxie was a little unsure about this, "Are you sure we got the right house Sir? It wouldn't be the first time that Loona got us the wrong info."
Blitz shook it off, "Out of question, my Loonie doesn't make any mistakes. This is the right house, I personally checked that myself."
Before his employee could say anything against it, his wife stopped him, "Honey, when our Boss tells you he checked it through, then it is correct."
"Yeah, listen to your hoe Mox. I know what I am doing, now stop wasting time and find that bitch!"
This is not good.