-February 17th 2000-
We are all at Central Perk hanging out as Rachel enters.
Rachel:Hey you guys.Guess what?.Barry and Mindy are getting a divorce!.
Monica:Oh my God.
Phoebe:Wow!.
Joey:"To Ross".What is the matter with you?!.
Tabitha:No hun Barry and Mindy.
Joey:Oh sorry I hear divorce I immediately go to Ross."To Rachel".Who,who’s Barry and Mindy?.
Rachel:Barry was the guy that I was almost married and Mindy was my best friend.
Joey:Oh,oh wasn’t he cheating on you with her?
Rachel:Yeah but that just means that he was falling asleep on top of her instead of me.
Monica:Why did they get divorced?.
Rachel:Well apparently she caught him cheating on her with someone else.Isn’t that sad?."Giggles".God could you imagine if I actually married him?!.I mean how different would my life be?.
Ross:I know what you mean I’ve always wondered how different my life would be if-if I’d never gotten divorced.
Tabitha:"Teasingly".Which time?.
Ross:The first time!.No seriously imagine if Carol hadn’t realized she was a lesbian.
Cassius:I can’t.I keep seeing it the good way.
Ross:I’d bet I’d still be doing my kara-tay.Towards the end of our marriage I was doing a lot of kara-tay as a way of releasing the tension from y’know not doing anything else physical.
Chandler:Maybe the problem was you were pronouncing it kara-tay.
Monica:And what if I was still fat?."To Chandler".Well you wouldn’t be dating me that’s for sure.
Chandler:Sure I would!.
All:Oh yeah!.Come on!.Yeah right!.
Chandler:What you guys really think that I’m that shallow?.
Ross:No I just think Monica was that fat.
Cassius:Hey imagine if Joey never got fired off Days Of Our Lives."Closes eyes".Oh hey there’s Carol again.
Chandler:What if I had had the guts to quit my job?.I’d probably be writing for the New Yorker getting paid to be funny. But my job’s fun too.I mean tomorrow I-I don’t have to wear a tie.
Phoebe:What if I had taken that job at Merrill Lynch?.
Ross:What?!.
Rachel:Merrill Lynch?.
Phoebe:Yeah I had a massage client who worked there and,and he said I had a knack for stocks.
Rachel:Well why didn’t you take the job?.
Phoebe:Because at that time you see I thought everything that rhymed was true. So I thought y’know that if I’d work with stocks I’d have to live in a box and only eat lox and have a pet fox.
Ross:Hey do you guys think that if all those things happened we’d still hang out?.
Monica:Oh my god!.What if Joey never forgave Tabitha?.
Tabitha:I'd rather not imagine that.
Me and Joey look at eachother and then to Eliana.
Joey:Yeah we wouldn't have our princess.
Tabitha:And I'd probably not be here with all of you guys.
Phoebe:Why not?.
Tabitha:When Joey was ignoring me I thought I'd might have to move away...
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-February 24th 2000-
At Central Perk Me,Joey,Ross,Chandler and Phoebe are hanging out as Cassius is working.
Ross:Hey remember when I had a monkey?.
Chandler:Yeah.
Tabitha:Yes.
Joey:Yeah.
Ross:Yeah what,what was I thinking?.
Cassius:"Picks up bill".Hey.So what’s with the 20 percent tip?.Did I do something wrong?.
Tabitha:Twenty percent is a pretty generous tip Cas.
Cassius:Y’know what’s more generous than that?!.Fifty percent.Y’know what’s even more generous than that?!.
Chandler:I see where you’re goin.
Ross:What’s up with the greed Cassie?.
Cassius:All right look I’m sorry you guys but it’s just that I gotta get these new head shots made.And they’re really expensive y’know?.I’m down to like three.Well actually two cause one of em I kinda blackened in some teeth.Why did I do that?!."Hits his head".
Ross:Well isn’t there something you can do to earn a little extra money?.I mean can’t,can’t you pick up I don’t know an extra shift here?.
Phoebe:Or y’know I used to beg for money. Of course it helps if you’ve got y’know a little of this."Sticks out chest,shakes it".Goin on.Wow.I still have it!.
Ross:Oh wait!,Wait.Don’t you have an audition today?.Yeah!.Maybe you’ll get that job!.
Cassius:Oh ha,ha,ha!.
Joey:Oh!.Wait a minute I used to get medical experiments done on me all the time.
Chandler:Ah finally an explanation.
Joey:No,no!.I used to get paid for all kinds of medical stuff remember?.Let’s see uh well Cas probably don’t want to donate sperm.
Cassius:"To Ross".I really prefer doing that at the home office y’know?...Oh,oh maybe they want like some of my blood or,or spit or something huh?.
Gunther approaches with a tray with an order on it.
Gunther:Cassius!.
Cassius:Yeah?
Gunther:What did I tell you about talking to your friends while you’re working?.
Cassius:Uh do it?.
Gunther:That guy."Points".Has been waiting for his coffee for ten minutes.He’s complained about you three times.
Gunther hands the coffee cup to Cassius and walks away.
Cassius:Well where was I?."Takes sip of coffee".
Later that night I'm in Eliana's bedroom while Joey's out shopping.I watch as Eliana sleeps and soon I'm disturbed by a shouting from the Apartment buliding hallway.
R
oss:"Yells".Danger!,Danger!.
I then hear two female screams coming from Phoebe and Rachel.
Phoebe:Ross!.
Rachel:What the hell was that?!.
I watch as Eliana is half asleep now and then a few seconds later I hear another scream.
Ross:"Yells".Danger!.
Eliana cries and I pick her up holding her in my arms as I go to the hallway to see Ross,Rachel and Phoebe.
Tabitha:"Glares".You want to tell me why you woke up my daughter Ross Geller?!.
Ross:"Nervously".U-unagi...
Tabitha:Next time we are out in public together you are on diaper duty.And don't think I'm not telling JoJo about this.
I take Eliana back into my apartment still angry with my brother as I try to get Eliana back to sleep by singing songs to her.