What have I gotten myself into? How did I thought it was a good idea to have a secret relationship with some one? And why in the hell was that some one Ian Somerhalder. I am completely and utterly screwed.
This morning, he didn't do more than greet me with a hug, a hug that he gave everyone. Maybe mine was a bit more tight and had a hidden kiss on my ear but that's not the case.
I was walking around the set to the door to Damon's room so we can start shooting. I got a glimpse of Ian looking at me from his spot in front of the chimney. I stoke my tongue out at him and he sent a wink my way. I'm pretty sure I saw Kat behind him recording some behind the scenes stuff. Thank god she could only see my face and not Ian's.
They called 'action' and I entered the room shyly. Ian didn't even looked up at me from his hands, serving a glass of bourbon.
"That's twice today. You just can't stay away, can't you?" He said.
"This is actually the third time but-" I started my line and Ian's look was my 'stop talking' sign. "...Doesn't matter." I said quickly and walked up to him as we walked to the chimney. I shook my head 'no' when he handed me his drink, offering it to me. He shrugged his shoulder slightly and took a sip of it. "So, Stefan told me about you and Elena."
"With a smile, I assume." He said from behind his, now empty, glass.
"You don't have to think so low of him, you know?" I said, defending Stefan.
"But how couldn't I when I know, deep down, the near thought of the woman I thought I loved erasing every memory of me from her mind brings him joy?" He sounded more and more hurt by every word he said.
"You're right, Damon." I said. "You are so over her. Sounds like it too." I said sarcastically.
"So what?" He settled the glass down. "You know about Elena. When exactly does the need to come here and tell me about it had a purpose?" He said. I felt like he was pushing me away. And that only gave me more reasons to stay.
"It really doesn't. I came here to apologize."
"For what? You smelled my bed sheets and secretly liked it?" He said, deflecting the real purpose of me being here. Deep down, he knew.
"No. Cause you're feeling pain. Your love for Elena might not be there anymore but the hurt and the guilt are. Hurt because of your broken heart. And guilt because all the things Bonnie did to get you out of there, were in vain. Because the one reason why you wouldn't feel as guilty for it, ended up forgetting you. And now you are left with the guilt of having some one sacrifice herself for you, for no reason. And not being able to even apologize is eating you alive." Ian's face was becoming more and more serious by the second. Until a frown came over his face. "And, honestly? I can see why Bonnie would do it." I said and Ian looked at me for an explanation. "It wasn't because she wanted Elena to have you back. It was because she had hope in you. And even she saw you could be a better person. So she gave up her own freedom so you could become that person. And, frankly... I would've done the same thing." I whispered the last part slowly.
Ian came close to me and lowered his face onto mine a little, so we were facing each other.
"How can you, from all people, say that and not feel like you're about to lose your mind." He said. I chuckled and said the last piece of dialogue before the part everyone wanted to see.
"Maybe I already lost it."
At that moment everything went silent. Nobody moved and all eyes were on us, but I could only feel Ian's as he was staring as deeply into my eyes as I was staring into his. I knew he was going to do it, but I still felt the nervousness when he started leaning towards me slowly. I closed my eyes and let him get as close as he could before I kept with the dialogue. I felt his hand go to my face and the coldness of his lip brushing lightly into mine. I moved my face to the side a little, so his lips only meet my cheek, insanely close to my lip.
His face went back to the original distance and he looked slightly disappointed.
"I think I changed my mind about that drink." I said. A smirk grew on his face as his hands caressed my face on its way down to his side. He walked away to get me the drink. The director said 'Cut' and I took a look around. Everyone looked surprised for some reason. Even a few of the actors that were watching the scene.
I wasn't expecting everyone to start clapping and the noise took my by surprise. I felt like I have just made a big achievement with this scene. Honestly, the biggest achievement was not screw up the scene and letting Ian kiss me in front of everybody. It took some self-control not to do that and I thought I deserved the clapping for it.
We went straight into filming our part of the montage for the ending sequence so Ian guided me to Damon's window, where we were going to be facing the window and I was going to pull out Damon's ring, give it to him and exchange one of those looks with Ian again. The 'eye-sex', as the director referred to it.
-x-
After the whole episode was shot, they wanted to shoot like a quick documental in which the actors were going to talk about me and I was going to talk about them and then we'd share some laughs on camera all together.
So they had us on these directors chairs, one beside the other. I took the middle chair and Ian took the one by my left.
From left to right, it was: McQueen, Zach, Trevino, Ian, me, Paul, Candace, Kat and Nina.
The director asked one question to get the conversation going.
'What were you most surprised about this shooting process?'
Every one started talking at once. They all stopped and looked at each other once they noticed and they quickly laughed before Kat started talking.
"I think I speak for all of us when I say, what was the most, if not surprising, exciting of this shooting process was having a fan on set with us." Every one started agreeing and Ian jumped in.
"And also having that fan being as talented as Veronica, it has really surprised us all watching how she works and how, in such little time, her character has developed and shaped into what it is by the end of the episode." He said.
Candace spoke up next. "Totally, and I think we where pretty lucky to have a winner that had experience on the business because it meant that we didn't needed to sugar-coat-it for her. She already knew the seriousness in all of it and that brought another sense of professionalism to it that we definitely weren't expecting." She said. Paul started talking next.
"I just think Ian wanted Damon to get some action with the new character and that's why they created the whole thing." Every one started laughing including Paul, who couldn't finish his joke because of the laughter. Ian spoke next.
"No. But, in all seriousness, we were more than amazed by this woman. She has surprised us all with her professionalism, her devotion, her initiative, I mean, she blew us all away from the start and it just got better from there." He said and I felt myself blushing.
Through out the whole time some one was talking, the rest were nodding in agreement.
"But, Veronica, what surprised you the most?" Nina asked. I felt on the spot immediately, but I managed to get through it.
"Well, for starters, winning." I said like it was the most obvious thing ever and they laughed. "Then, of course, all that came with it: meeting the writers, meeting the actors, shooting with them. Being a part of the show itself was incredible. Everything, really, everything. I was overwhelmed by all of it." I stopped talking for one second and then started talking again on a much less serious tone. "But Trevino's poor COD skills were what surprised me the most." Everyone started laughing except Trevino. He covered his face with his hand with shame and murmured 'oh not this again'. Then he started talking.
"You now what? My controller was messed up. I feel like you had some sort of advantage," he started saying to defend himself by making excuses while everyone laughed.
"Suck it up, buddy." Said Steven when the laughter died down a little.
"She came out of nowhere!" Trevino exclaimed and Zach started patting him on the shoulder sympathetically while saying 'It's okay, buddy. She won, you lost. Let's move on now.'
The director asked another question. This time directed at me.
Veronica, which were your favorite scenes to shoot?'
"Well, considering pretty much all of them were with Ian, there's not much to choose from." I said and we all started laughing. "All though, I wouldn't pick one in specific as my favorite. At least, what they have in common is that it had a lot of back-and-forth-talking between Damon and Megan, my character. And that's something I personally enjoy watching on screen so, you can only imagine how fun it was for me to shoot." I finished with a half smile and Kat added more to the conversation.
"And, not to mention, the chemistry between you two was insane. Like, literally every scene took like 3 takes, which is very little compare to the average number of takes required to get a scene done. And the only reason for them to do the extra takes was to get more footage like different angels and stuff. But not once did I ever saw any of you messing up or not hitting a mark or something. It was crazy." She said.
"Actually I was pretty sad when we finished filming just a minute ago. I didn't wanted it to end." Said Steven. I said a low 'aww' and Ian spoke up.
"Well it doesn't have to, actually. 'Cause Veronica is gonna stay for another episode." He said proudly while looking at me. Every one started cheering and clapping. I didn't knew I made such an impact. "So," he said looking at the cameras. "Don't miss it. The Vampire Diaries every Thursday at 8." He wrapped and arm around my shoulders and ended the segment. "Now, with the special appearance of Veronica Brooks."
-x-
After that, I went to my dressing room. I was on my laptop going through the social media. Yeah I was searching for myself on YouTube to see what came up. A lot of Rated B videos from live performances or videos the band itself made came up. And a couple TVD related videos which was what I was looking for.
I was sitting on the couch with the laptop in front of me on the coffee table when I heard my door upending and closing quickly. I looked up and found what I was waiting for all day.
Ian ran up to me, put his hands on either side of my face and pulled me up slightly to kiss me. I gladly stretched my neck and met his lips. His body came crumbling down beside me and my position became normal again. Ian was sitting on top of his knee on the couch and was kissing me passionately but slowly, savoring every kiss as if it were the last one.
He pulled away but kept his face close to mine. Close enough for me to feel his heavy breathing on my face.
"I've waited all day to do that" he whispered.
What have I gotten myself into? How did I thought it was a good idea to have a secret relationship with some one? And why in the hell was that some one Ian Somerhalder. I am completely and utterly screwed.
...Fuck it. It's worth it.