-Tala-
Last night I couldn't form any thoughts or proper words. My wolf took over and gods, it was amazing. Her confession and wanting me to be her first and last still pulls at my heart. I am waking up to a new reality of life. She will be bound to another by the authority of the elders. I can't stop it, I don't know what will happen. I saw the struggle in her mind slip away last night. She had given herself completely to me. Now, that internal struggle... sanity versus the wild wolf in my brain is hindering me. I have been awake for a while watching her sleep. I had always wondered what she felt like, sounded like, looked like in the mornings. Now that I have experienced it, how do I walk away? She has given me a taste of a life I dreamed and also, inadvertently, has the wild wolf clawing at the surface. I am lost in my thoughts when I hear her voice.
"Tala?" She says.
I smile down to her, she has no clue what she does to me.
"My luna," I say to her. Her smile grows knowing she is my queen.
"As wonderful as that is to hear, I know the fight in your head this morning," She says. I am confused, maybe I was in my mind longer than I realized. She runs her hands over my chest and it comes to rest over my heart. "I will always be yours,"
I pull her closer if possible and hug her tight to me.
"How am I supposed to let you go?" I ask quietly. I feel her body tense which causes mine to tense as well.
"I don't know," she says.
We lay together in peace for a while. When the time comes to get up and for her to get ready I feel completely on edge. I need to get out of here so I don't suffocate from the air that is being stolen from just one look from her.
"I'll leave you to get ready," I say.
She nods her head and her face shows she is struggling like I am. Not wanting to leave our tiny world we created, our safe universe. I don't want to but I need to talk to Herrick. I gently kiss her and place my forehead to hers. Needing reassurance in all that is bound between us.
"Same moon and sun..." I start.
"Same stars to follow when lost," she finishes.
Another quick kiss and I leave. I will see her at the ceremony and after we will say our goodbyes.
I walk to Herrick's home and I knock on his door. Standing on the edge of emotions. When he opens the door he seems confused.
"Tala?" Herrick says.
"A word please?" I ask.
He shows me in and leads me to his office. We take a seat and he stares me down. Swallow pride, be bold, be loud about what is important to me.
"I..." I start.
"Love her," He finishes. I can only nod my head. "I know, everyone sees it. I will tell you as I told her. I will never love her, not like you. It would be only as a friend."
"What if that changes?" I ask.
"It won't," Herrick says firmly.
"I am not confident enough in that. Once you get to know her it is hard not to fall in love," I say firmly back.
"Tell me Tala, why do you love her?" he asks.
"She calms the wild wolf in me. Makes me feel serene and alive at the same time. Kind and loyal. She was my best friend, one I did everything with as a child. I never saw her as the Chief's daughter and she never saw me as the weird boy. I love her because she is connected to me in spirit and always has been." I state.
"Good. I instantly see that she is a kind spirit and loyal to a fault. I can not love her because I love another. This marriage is to combine the leadership of both our tribes and produce an heir that will be a great chief to both tribes. Connecting the Mountains and the ocean." Herrick says.
I cringe at the heir part. They will have a child together.
"This is strictly for face value and to appease our elders and spirits. I promise to never love her in the way you do. Allow me to include you in on a small secret." Herrick proposes.
He tells me his secret and his plans. I am overwhelmed with the news and I have to leave his house right away. I need to be back with my luna. When I walk into our cottage, Aiyana has just gotten out of the shower and is standing in just a towel with a sulking look about her face. I am hers forever and she is mine. I will never have to wonder and my chest swells with pride even if I can't publicly say why at this time. This news not even she knows. She looks at me with a pleading misery that is begging for life.
"You WILL be mine Aiyana," I state.
Her eyes grow wide, "What?"
"I spoke with Herrick," I start.
"Wait..." She interrupts.
"The marriage today does not matter," I say. I can't form words so I run up and grasp her face in my hands and lean down so she is face to face with me. Eye to eye. Connected by the spirits.
"I am yours and you are mine, my Luna," I state. When she smiles it is like a kick in my chest and I crave more of this. "I will wait until it is our time if you will wait for me."
"I WILL!" she says.
That is all I need to get through this. I connect my lips to hers pulling her close to me. I had failed to realize that she is in a towel and is struggling to keep it together.
"When do they get here to get you ready?" I ask.
"I don't know, 30 minutes or so?" she says confused.
"Enough time.." I say
"For what?" she responds.
I reach down and pick her up and she wraps her legs around me. Pushing her against the wall. I push my tongue into her mouth as she gladly accepts it. Not fighting me back. I pull her towel off or her and kiss her neck and body. I want more with her but we are on a time limit. She reaches between us as I lean back and she pulls my shirt off and pushes my pants down. All while still having her legs wrapped around me. When she frees me, I grab her hips and guide her down. Watching her gasp taking in all of me and giving herself, once again, completely to me.
"My Luna," I moan.
"Oh, god, Tala!" She says.
Pulling her closer and thrusting into her hard she comes completely undone. I continue quick and deep thrust. My body is tense and full of pressure and as I release I fall my forehead to hers and try to steady my breath. I stand holding her, still not ready to let go of this moment.
"I don't know what happened or what will happen after today..." She says breathlessly.
"Our time will come, I promise you!" I quickly say.
I will tell her the news one day, but not today. Today the tribes become connected by a piece of paper. I let her down and guide her back to the bathroom where we both clean up and she slips on a robe. I head to the living room and start to welcome the women of the tribe to help her get ready. All while she is talking with her new members she is stealing small looks at me. When it is my time to leave I will take my place in the back of the crowd. As painful as this is, she has promised to wait for me and I will wait for her. That is the only comfort I have. As I am lost in thought an elder walks up to me.
"I see you, great warrior..." She says.
I bow my head to her for respect.
"What is your name?" She asks.
"I am Tala ma'am," I essay.
"Ah, the wolf! Tell me wolf, are you ready?" She asks.
"Ready for what?" I am confused.
"The great spirit war," she states.
"I'm sorry?" I said staring down at her.
"A war is upon us, it is in the air. Do you not smell it a great wolf?" she says.
I stare down at her confused.
"There will be a great loss and the sun will rise with a red sky. So warrior, is your wolf ready?" She asks again.
Just as I am about to respond to the elder the music and drums play signaling the start of the wedding. I look around and see happiness and an uneasiness falls upon me. Aiyana starts to walk down the aisle and she is absolutely beautiful. Her long black hair falls effortlessly along her back, the lace and tassel dress hugs closely to her body. She gets halfway down the aisle and her eyes still seek the connection with mine. She is absolutely beautiful and I am instantly jealous of Herrick. That should be me! Just as she gets to the front and Herrick takes her hand the officiant starts to talk. As he takes a moment of silence we hear a rumble and then an explosion. The ground shakes and another explosion.
People are running in panic and I am trying to get to her when I feel something warm hit my side. I look down and see a bullet wound, just a graze. I shoot my eyes up and find her immediately. She has blood all over her face and dress. She is looking around for me, scared. I am pushing people out of the way trying to navigate this chaos to get to her.
"AIYANA!" I scream.
I am running towards her when an explosion nearby takes me off my feet. I am trying to stay awake but my body and mind are overtaking itself. In a dizzy faze I see two men grabbing for Aiyana who is limp in their arms and carrying her away. I don't recognize the men and that scares me. I promised to protect her, love her, make her my luna.
"AIYANA!!" I scream again.
I try to crawl towards them, but it is as if my body and mind can't connect with each other. The ringing in my ears, the pain in my head, and the pure hurt in my body start to take over.
Darkness takes over
My Luna
Gone