Authors: Derpangels
Reviewer: lolitanto
Chapters reviewed: 13
First impression :
Cover:
The picture you put up is amazing and it matches the whole plot of the book. But the font of the tittle is a no no. You should make it bolder, more eye catching, it should stand out, but not in a way that it'll cover the whole picture.
Title:
Where do we go? Is a perfect title for your book. It goes well with the cover and also with the plot. Good job on that.
Blurb:
Your blurb was okay but I'll still point out some faults.
First a deadly virus spread then leads to quarantine. There was no indication that there's a second and a third. You just ended it there and started listing other problems. I don't know if you get my point, take a look at this :
First, a deadly virus spreads leads to quarantine..., after which lockdown leads to no food production...
If you see what I did there I made it continue but you just ended it. You could also try this
A deadly virus spreads leads... without adding the first.
You also said that they were struggling to survive and to find cure, but up to the last part of the story so far it's a whole different thing. The group of friends were running away from the people who kidnapped their families and trying to find their families. I don't know maybe if that will happen at the later part of the story, well if it doesn't you should probably edit the blurb.
Writing style :
You have a unique style of writing. Your words were simple yet brilliant, but there are some things you should take into consideration.
*The thoughts of the character should be in italics instead of a bracket or just writing it like that. It would make your writing seem more professional.
*Most of the times I got confused on who was talking, so you should always indicate that.
*You always make us lost at the beginning of a chapter before you explain it later, which is really cool but there's something you need to know. Like from chapter 9 I was lost till I got to chapter 12, well that made me want to read more further into the book, but it could also discourage some people. So I advice that you should minimize the suspense, what I mean is that you should make it at least more understandable before you give the reveal few chapters away.
Grammatical errors:
None at all, from your spellings, to the use of your words, to the punctuation.
I still wonder how people can write without flaws🚶🏻♀️
Good job there 👍
Character development:
Honestly I don't have a favorite character oh how could I forget Axel🥺,okay back to my point. I feel you did a good job with your characters and their flaws and everything. They have different personalities that make them unique. The way you made the girls brave and the boys the cowards😂😂💔well, there goes one stereotype.
I feel the characters are a little bit too immature to be 17. Most of their quarrels are uncalled for, I know you already explained to me that they were tensed up and all, but then it has happened multiple times. I mean if they've been friends for five years, they should definitely be used to their flaws and be able to tolerate each other instead of snapping at each other every time.
Plot:
Amazing.
A very original and interesting plot you've got there.
Chapter 1-
You know, the first chapter is really important. The waking up by an alarm stuff is on almost all Wattpad books, and people are already tired of seeing it. She doesn't have to wake up to an alarm! Her mother could shout or something. Better still the waking up in the morning part should leave.
Final Impressions :
Honestly, I had a good time reading your book. I laughed several times at their bickering and some moments were really relatable. I'm definitely rooting for Axel and Aura🥺 let's not forget Zach and flo😂❤️❤️
The poem🥺🥺❤️❤️ it was beautiful.
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I'm sorry for the late review, I'm a bit slow and I've been so busy lately. I hope you'll find my review helpful. Well if you have any suggestions or disapproval for anything written here feel free to tell me.
Yours sincerely Ada🦋