(Written as a script)
Chris appeared on screen.
Chris: Welcome back to Total Drama, everyone's favorite show! We have campers from all seasons competing for $1,000,000, on Total. Drama. Return!!!
screen went black and showed Chris on the dock.
Chris: And here are the contestants! First up is the lovable and sarcastic bookworm, Noah!
Noah walked off the boat.
Noah: Yippee, so glad to be back.
He said in an obvious sarcastic tone.
Chris: That's the spirit! Next, we have Mr. Bad boy himself, Duncan!!
Duncan walked out with a look of disgust.
Duncan: Didn't this place sink?
Chris: It's a man made version of Wawanakwa! Aren't you happy?!
He smirked.
Noah rolled his eyes. Cody walked out.
Chris: And here we have the candy lover, Cody!
Cody: What's up, guys?
Cody walked over to Noah and Duncan at the end of the dock
Noah: Hey, gaps.
Cody smiled, showing the gap in his teeth.
Chris: Next we have Courtney.
Courtney got off the boat and walked towards the others.
Duncan: Hey, princess.
Courtney: Eww. Don't call me that, ogre.
Chris: The dumb blonde, Lindsey!!
Lindsey walked towards everyone with many large bags.
Lindsey: OMG! I'm so happy to be back! Hi Carrie, hi Damien, hi Conner, hi Nick!
Noah rolled his eyes and whispered to Cody.
Noah: How much do you wanna bet that's the closest she'll get all summer?
Cody giggled in response, and the next camper walked off the boat, Eva.
Chris: What's up, Eva?!
Eva grabs Chris's collar.
Eva: Why am I back here?!
Chris: You signed the contract.
Eva growled and walked to the campers.
Chris: Next we have boyfriend kisser, Gwen.
Gwen walked out annoyed at the name.
Gwen: I thought we forgot about that?!
Courtney: We did.
Chris: Next is the crazy girl, Izzy!!
Izzy jumped off the boat.
Izzy: It's so good to be back! The beaver family I was living with started getting all bossy, so this will be a nice break!
Izzy was practically bouncing and everyone was slowly getting more annoyed.
Chris: And the last contestant from season 1 is Heather!!
Heather: We're back?! Oh hell no, I'm not staying here!
Heather tried going back to the boat, but Chef grabbed her.
Chris: You signed the contract!
Chris held up Heather's contract. Heather rolled her eyes and walked towards the others.
Chris: From Total Drama World Tour, we have Alejandro!
Alejandro walked out and smiled at Heather.
Heather: Stop looking at me, Ale-jerk-dro.
Alejandro: Whatever you say, mi amor.
Heather: Don't call me that!
Heather turned her head away from him.
Chris: From Revenge of the Island, we have Zoey and Mike!
Zoey got off the boat while holding hands with Mike.
Zoey: Hi, everyone!
Everyone greeted the two before the next camper arrived.
Chris: We have the farm boy, Scott!
Scott left the boat and Courtney ignored him.
Chris: Last from Revenge of the Island is Dawn!
Scott: No!
Dawn got off the boat and glared at Scott.
Dawn: Hello, everybody, I'm excited to meet some of you!
Chris: First up from Pahkitew Island is Dave.
Dave walked off the boat and looked around at his fellow campers before joining them.
Chris: Up next is Sky!
Sky hopped off the boat and Dave started getting angry, remembering the finale of the season.
Chris: Lastly, we have Shawn, the Zombie survival-
Shawn: Did you say Zombie?!
Shawn jumped off the boat and into the water while his tall girlfriend calmly walked out.
Chris: -and Jasmine, his tall girlfriend.
Shawn got out of the water and stood with Jasmine and the other characters.
Chris: Here are the teams. If I call your name, stand over there.
He pointed to the left of the dock.
Chris: Dave, Noah, Gwen, Lindsey, Cody, Shawn, Zoey, Izzy, and Jasmine. You are the Tough Turtles.
The people walked over to the specified spot. Cody and Noah high fived.
Chris: Team Skillfull Snails are Eva, Sky, Scott, Alejandro, Mike, Duncan, Heather, Dawn, and Courtney.
Mike: Good luck, Zoey!
Zoey hugged her boyfriend quickly before both returned to their teams.
Dawn: I have to be on a team with him?!
She was referring to Scott.
Duncan: I'm happy with my team.
He made eye contact with Courtney, who turned her head.
Chris: Let's get into our first challenge, both teams will go through the relay race. Starting with one member on each team running up that hill.
Chris points to the cliff diving hill from the first episode of season 1.
Chris: That member will then tag the next teammate, who has to dive into the water and swim to the shore. They tag the person waiting there, who will make their way to the other side of the box by climbing over or going under it. Then, they tag the person on the treadmill who will run one mile. The last teammate will climb the monkey bars to the finish line. If you fall off, you must go back to the beginning of the bars. Each team will go twice, meaning one contestant will go twice.
Turtles
Lindsey: Ooh! I can climb monkey bars! When I was in school, I climbed them allllll the time!
Dave: Fine, Cody's the only one small enough to go under the box and that looks easier because of how tall it is, so he'll do that.
The Tough Turtles kept discussing the order and the camera showed the Skillfull Snails discussing the order.
Sky: I can go twice.
The screen faded and showed the beginning of the hill, with Zoey and Duncan about to start.
Chris: Three! Two! One! Go!!
Chris blew a whistle and Duncan and Zoey started running. Zoey was halfway up the hill, with Duncan not far behind, when Chris pressed a button. Soon after, boulders started rolling down the hill. Zoey and Duncan jumped over the first boulder, Zoey jumped over the second and Duncan missed and fell back a few feet, and Zoey reached the top before the third fell down (which Duncan jumped). Zoey tagged Shawn, who dove down. Duncan got to Courtney. He tagged her.
Duncan: You got this, princess.
Courtney smiled and jumped into the water. Shawn and Courtney reached the shore at the same time and tagged Eva and Cody. Cody crawled underneath the box, which was very tall and very long, and tried going as fast as possible. Eva started climbing to the top of the box, but Cody was doing much better by going underneath it.
Noah: C'mon Cody! You can do it!
Cody heard his voice and immediately went faster, but Eva was getting close. Cody got out from under the box and tagged Dave on the tredmill. Eva got to Mike a second later and tagged him. Both boys started running, but Mike was running at a faster pace. Mike finished first and tagged Sky.
Noah: Hurry up, Dave!
Dave finished a few seconds later before tagging Lindsey.
Lindsey: What do I do again?
Dave: Climb the damn bars, dumbass!
Dave was annoyed at how stupid Lindsey was.
Confessional
Lindsey: Derrek is like, super mean.
Lindsey started climbing, but was severely behind Sky. Sky crossed the finish line and Lindsey crossed a little bit after.
Chris: That's 23 minutes and 49 seconds for the Skillfull Snails, and 25 minutes and 6 seconds for the Tough Turtles. Time for round two!
Everyone got in their spots, with Scott and Gwen at the bottom of the hill. Chris blew the whistle and they started running. The boulders fell when Gwen and Scott were halfway up. Scott tripped ver the first boulder, causing Gwen to take the lead. Gwen dodged the other boulders and got to the top before Scott, and tagged Jasmine. She dove into the water as Scott reached Sky. Sky reached Heather when Zoey was on top of the box, running to the other side. Heather was slowly catching up to Zoey. They got to the tredmills within seconds of each other, Heather behind Zoey, and they tagged Noah and Dawn's hands. Noah ran as fast as he could, but was still not very fast.
Cody: Go Noah!! I believe in you!!
Noah blushed and ran faster, suddenly having more motivation. Dawn kept running at about the same speed as Noah. Noah finished before Dawn and ran to Izzy. Dawn quickly tagged Alejandro when she finished. Izzy climbed quickly, it was easy for her since she lived in the woods. Izzy finished in no time with Alejandro a few seconds behind.
Chris: Aaannnd the total times are 52 minutes and 18 seconds for the Snails, and 51 minutes and 54 seconds for the Turtles! Turtles win! Snails, you will be voting someone home tonight.
The Turtles all cheered and high fived each other. Screen shows Courtney, Duncan, Alejandro, and Heather walking in the woods.
Heather: We should stick together untill the merge, we are the originals.
Duncan: Sounds good to me.
Alejandro: Anything for you, mi amor.
Heather pretended to gag.
Heather: Drop dead.
Courtney agreed and the group discussed who they would be voting out.
Slimey Snails
Chris: If you don't get a marshmallow, go to the Dock of Shame, ride the Boat of Losers, and never EVER return. The first marshmallow goes to Courtney.
Courtney got up and grabbed her marshmallow.
Chris: Duncan, Sky, Dawn, Mike, Heather, and Scott. We have one marshmallow left, will it go to Alejandro or Eva? The person safe tonight is..................... Alejandro!
Eva jumped up.
Eva: You voted me off?! I'm the strongest person on this team! You'll all pay for this!
Chris: That does it for this episode of Total Drama: Return! Who will leave next? What crazy challenge will I come up with next? Will Heather finally admit her feelings for Alejandro?
Screen comes back to see Noah and Cody in the cabin. Noah was on the top bunk with Cody underneath on the bottom bunk.
Noah: Good job on the challenge today. You going under the box saved us a ton of time.
Cody hid his blush by hiding his face in his comic book.
Cody: You did great, too.
Noah smiled and blushed a little bit.
Noah: Thanks, gaps.
Cody: I usually don't like when people talk about the gap in my teeth, but when Noah does it, I like it. We actually met up and became really good friends when we weren't on the show, so I know he's not making fun of me.
Cody blushed.
-Credits-