The fact that I admitted to Athena that I was actually intimidated by her briefly skimmed my mind. I know being honest is good even when it's bad, but was it a smart move on my part? The last thing I wanted was for her to feel like she had to change the way she approaches me.
But it also felt like a weight off my chest. Now there was no need for me to pretend like I knew what I was actually doing and what I actually wanted. And I think the best part about all of it is that she's patient and understanding.
I didn't have any real idea of what was gonna happen tonight at her place. I didn't want to get in the habit of thinking we were going to have sex every time I came over.
Everything I was thinking about quickly disappeared from my mind when I was greeted at the door with strong feverish kisses that were teasing and tantalizing in nature. She destroyed any plans to move slow tonight.
I lifted Athena with little to no effort. Her legs wrapped around my waist and even though I was holding her she still had control. My neck arched all the way back, her hands at the side of my face and her lips borderline devouring mine — my body was practically singing already.
She broke the kiss, both of us breathing heavily, "I've been waiting for you."
I smiled, "Oh trust me I noticed."
She smiled, "Would you like dinner now? Or ..."
I raised my eyebrow, "Or?"
She shrugged, "Or ... we can save it for later."
"Well, uh ... I'm a bit hungry for something else," I replied.
"I bet you are," She grinned. "Who would've thought."
"Hm ... well, I'm not particularly happy about the assumptions of me being scared. I guess I'd like to settle that right now."
She whispered, "Then settle it."
"Fine."
Tonight I didn't want the couch to host us, in fact, I was getting sick of the couch when she had a nice and comfortable bed toward the back of the house.
We began kissing all over again, this time a lot slower but just as powerful. I strolled to her room with her in my arms while taking a couple of peaks along the way to make sure I didn't bump her into anything.
We fell onto the bed. Athena didn't waste any time pulling my shirt up. I quickly took it off and threw it somewhere. Her touch was tender against my abs and chest. I was curious to know just how much she enjoyed my body.
She sighed quietly into my lips as I backed off a few centimeters. I spoke, "Can I ask you something?"
"Of course," She answered bringing her hands to the sides of my neck.
"How do you feel about my body? Or the way I look — I mean like ... obviously I'm different, you know? I'm probably not like any other girls you've—"
Athena's finger shushed me for a moment, her finger swiping across my lips. I cleared my throat and sucked my lips in to prevent myself from saying anything else.
"I think you look amazing. Your features are sharp but refined in their femininity. The cut of your jawline is very defined but still bears a softness to it. Your eyes bright even though sometimes they appear cold and distant. It doesn't bother me that you're rather ... in the middle. It's sexy and it's you."
I blink rapidly not really knowing what to say back to her. I've never heard anyone describe me in such a poetic way. I felt bare, stripped, and completely naked while having my clothes on. Has she paid attention to my features that much?
She took advantage of my speechlessness and swiftly rolled me over onto my back. I followed the motions and laid flat on my back staring up at the ceiling until Athena's face came into my view. I felt her straddling me, her knees and thighs resting against the very bottom of my rib cage. This position was making me weak.
She gently dragged her fingertips from the base of my neck down my collarbones and down the middle of my chest, following my breastbone down to my stomach. I tensed up, my muscles rippling underneath her touch. I try not to focus on the fact that I'm a little ticklish at the moment.
"Shit," I breathed heavily.
A tight ball has started forming just above my bladder. I relaxed as much as I could under Athena's teasing touches. She was focused on my body and my eyes started rolling back when she dipped her hand under my brief band.
I clenched my thighs as her hand came back up my stomach. I refuse to open my eyes at this point. They already feel heavy in their sockets. I don't think I'll last if I open my eyes and stare into Athena's as she teases and caresses me.
"You're sexy and you deserve to feel sexy," She said. Her tone sultry on purpose. "And your body, wow. Your shoulders and their broadness. The sturdiness in them when I hold you there. Your biceps and triceps flexing whenever you hold me or hug me, your lightly scarred and calloused hands grabbing my breasts ... holding my legs up. Your strong lips kissing me and other parts of my body. I love feeling all of it. I love feeling you in the skin you're in."
I took a shaky breath, blindly bringing my hands to rest on her thighs. I felt her presence looming over me. I slowly opened my eyes to her's looking down at my lips. This feeling was indescribable. She made me feel like I was perfect and that I shouldn't think about myself in any lesser way.
"I'd keep going, but it looks like you've had enough," She smirked. "It's time I take care of you now."
I groaned, "You took care of me already. It's my turn."
She hummed, "I have different plans for how you can take care of me."
She piqued my interest, but I put my curiosity aside and began to sit myself up. I grunted and stretched my arms, "Sex takes two to tango."
She smiled and circled my shoulders with her arms, "Does it now?"
"It does. You also work harder, let me," I argued.
She gently caught my lips, shutting me up. I slid my hands up under tank top, feeling her hot skin against my hands. My thumbs grazed the skin under her breasts.
"So selfless," She teased. "I don't think I've ever been with someone so focused on me."
I grabbed her face and made her arch her neck. I sunk my teeth into the soft skin, hard enough to draw a moan from her.
"You deserve it," I said into her neck. "So let me."
She moaned softly, pulling me closer to her body. I grabbed both breasts this time, squeezing them lightly in my hands. Her nipples hard against my palms.
Things picked up speed rather fast. We were both clearly hungrier for each other than the actual food she made. We bumped and fought over control during some moments and I actually enjoyed it. I enjoyed having this goddess of a woman fighting to please me. But Athena knew she couldn't physically overpower me no matter how hard she tried.
I left several marks down her body, some hickeys red as blood and some light bite marks that would fade in a day or two. She seemed to like the level up in roughness taking place. Could I have found a kink of hers?
It'd be simple to ask, but I think I like finding out for myself. I like listening to her sharp inhales and deep breaths. I like to feel her muscles twitch and jerk under me. I felt my pride swelling in my chest.
Being able to take care of a woman like this ... I couldn't help but think that maybe I was actually dreaming.
Soon it was a mess of Athena's sheets and pillows. She had finally gotten me out of my sports bra and admired my naked torso for the first time. I knew her next goal was my briefs, but she was sidetracked by my hands now spreading her legs apart.
I took my time, spreading her folds with my tongue. Her moan was sharp and her fingernails dug into my forearms. My arms were stretched in their full length as she tugged on them gently, holding my wrists.
An idea sprang in my head. It's a pretty simple and obvious idea, but I know the combination is probably overwhelmingly good. I took my right arm back from Athena and gently massaged her inner right thigh.
Both of her hands clutch my left arm, holding it close to her stomach. I quickly took two fingers into my mouth, wetting them generously. I lined them up with Athena's entrance, sliding in.
She sighed heavily, "Oh,"
Her walls tightened down on them and I swore I felt her throbbing inside.
I continued to eat her while slowly pressing up against her upper wall. The rhythm took a few seconds for my brain to figure out, but I got the hang of it. Athena surely got it too.
"Oh, fuck," She moaned. "God — dammit,"
I flicked my tongue up and down while giving her the full length of my fingers, pulling at her bundle of nerves with my mouth. She was beyond wet now, my saliva contributing to the mess. I picked up the pace, the sounds of her squelching walls relentless in my ears.
"God — Nova —"
She was panting now, her body no longer staying in place. Her hips were rolling, my mouth now sliding all over her.
"Yes — you're so good at that,"
The praise warmed my heart and sent flares of heat between my legs. I didn't let up as Athena slowly began to move upward on the bed and away from my mouth. I latched onto her and held her hip in place with my free hand. It was a little strange, having utilized both hands and my mouth, but it was working wonders.
She began unraveling in a matter of moments. A loud cry ripped through the air and I did my best to help her ride the orgasm. Her legs had wrapped around my head. I quickly took my fingers out and held on to her thighs.
She was buried in her bliss, panting and shaking. It took her a few minutes to come back down to earth and here I was, waiting patiently while leaving a trail of gentle kisses up her body.
I chuckled quietly as she lazily turned on her side. Her long hair spilling across her face and the pillow.
Dinner has been served.
✸✸✸
Athena was close to me, still naked and now wrapped up in her sheets. I was laying on my stomach, my head resting on my folded arms, staring back at her. Her fingers traced around my shoulder and the outline of my bicep.
I hummed a little, relaxing. Every muscle in my body shutting down. I closed my eyes for a few seconds until she spoke.
"Thank you," She said softly. "That was ... out of this world."
I smirked, "Sounded like that one hit you pretty hard."
"Oh, it did. I was blindsided by it. I wasn't expecting the fingers and tongue combination. That orgasm hit me like a truck."
"So, what do you have planned for me again?" I asked.
She grinned, "I'd hate to ruin the surprise, so don't worry about it. I think you'll like it."
I groaned, "Do I have to wait till' after Christmas?"
She chuckled, "Mmm ... no. I don't want to wait that long."
"Hm ... fine then. Guess I'll be patient."
She smiled and rested her hand between the small space between my bicep and forearm. I kissed her fingers gently.
"Why didn't your ex touch you?" She asked.
"I ... wasn't really asking to be touched, I guess. I never cared for it. When you touched me I wasn't sure if I was going to like it," I answered, thinking about Willow. "But I let it happen. Because I trust you."
"Well ... that makes me happy — that you trust me that much."
"I didn't know I trusted you that much until last night," I admitted.
"I guess you never know until you try," She responded. "I'm glad you gave me the chance and I'm glad you enjoyed yourself."
"Did you mean what you said earlier? About ... me?"
"Of course I did. I wouldn't be risking my livelihood if I didn't think you were extremely attractive and likable — your muscles and abs help tremendously of course."
I laughed. I gave her a small smile, "Thanks for the reassurance ... and for risking it all."
"You don't have to thank me. I've made that conscious choice on my own. If all comes crashing down ..."
"Don't talk like that," I said in a firmer tone. "It won't come crashing down."
The look on her face told me that she didn't really believe me, but she was trying too.
"Are you paranoid?" I asked.
She sighed, "I ... am, but I try my best to ground myself. There haven't been any threats or suspicions from anyone. No need to psyche myself out, you know?"
"I like to think me staying under the radar is helping. I don't think Gallagher would save my ass this time," I replied grimly.
"If you don't mind me asking, what did happen? Between you and him, I mean."
"Hmm ..." I began recalling those dark times. "My mother's health was declining faster than we expected. My Dad was alone for the majority of mornings because I would go to school, but during the night I usually stayed up with her or fell asleep in the chair by the bed. We'd take turns like that. My Dad was still trucking it to work some days, but he didn't like leaving us alone. We were tired. Exhausted. It didn't even feel like we were human. It felt like we were paying — being punished for something. We were just ... running on autopilot."
Her eyes were sad. She tightened her hand on my forearm. Her thumb began rubbing against my skin.
I continued, "I started coming to school further away every day. I'm pretty sure I was disassociating for some of it cause I can't remember some fights I had gotten into. I didn't know what was real. Gallagher would scream at me about some kid I fucked up and I would stare at him like he was crazy. I couldn't remember what I had done. I picked a fight with anyone. If someone looked at me the wrong way, said something in a weird tone ... anything. It numbed the pain, fighting. At least I thought it did. Gallagher eventually had enough and had to handle me himself because I was close to getting expelled."
"Were you ever suspended?"
"I was a few times, but then the fights started getting bloodier and more frequent. Clearly suspension wasn't working. My Dad was too tired and caught up with my Mom to really try and discipline me. Eventually, my Dad took it upon himself to tell Gallagher everything that's been going on and about my little friend in an attempt to save my ass. It worked. He even told him I was going through intensive therapy — which I wasn't. I was in therapy for grief."
"I'm guessing your condition sort of saved you," She said.
"If you wanna look at it that way. How'd they even get on the topic of me at the beginning of the semester?" I asked. Now seems like a good time to finally get an answer.
She made a noise, "I guess I can tell you this now. On every educator's list of students, whoever has a learning disability, illness, stuff of that sort — they're marked. We don't ask for that information, they just give it to us. It's so we have an idea of who may need extra help."
I didn't respond for a few moments. Athena has no reason to lie to me especially now. Gallagher did say that he would probably have eyes on me upon coming back to school.
"I know the first time I told you, you were really upset."
"Of course I was," I said. "I felt like I was singled out and everyone knew my business. If I was marked on your list I imagine every teacher who has me knows. I didn't think he'd do that — without letting me know. Getting me some shady senior counselor without letting me know. Fucking stupid, all of it."
She squeezed my arm, "He probably just wanted you to feel normal, and not like you had a target on your back."
I scoffed, "Shitty job well done."
She sighed softly, staring at me for a few more seconds longer then closing her eyes, "At least things are calm now."
"Yeah ... " I mumbled. "Calm before the storm, I guess."
I kissed her fingers again and kept my lips on her knuckles. I can imagine she's pretty tired after the sex.
I watched as Athena eventually lost consciousness in the passing time. Her breathing pattern changed, her chest moving up and down slowly. She looked so peaceful and relaxed. For someone who's always on the move, it's nice to see her still and resting.
I never want to leave her side. I hate weekdays because I can't stay over due to our conflicting schedules, but I didn't feel like moving. Not yet.
I closed my eyes, thinking about the day, letting my thoughts come and go.
I have to leave soon, but a few minutes won't hurt ...