I guess watching older couples made me believe in love.
But...
I didn't know not everyone was blessed enough to have it.
His neck muscles were spasming against the hardwood floor. Namjoon groaned, sitting up slowly and rolling his shoulders until he heard a satisfying pop.
Hye Jin was still sleeping and still was possibly sick. Her full lips pouted as she slept quietly. Namjoon gulped, Why am I being so weak?
Yet, his thumb was brushing against her thick bottom lip, watching how the fatty tissue molded with his finger. She naturally began to salivate on his thumb before he pulled back, a soft wet pop noise from the action.
If only Hye Jin knew how badly he wanted to kiss her juicy, pouty lips. Or how badly he just wanted her, for years.
Namjoon's eyes focused on the small mole on Hye Jin's cheek. He remembers meeting her at the club months ago. He wished he could've introduced himself sooner. Maybe things wouldn't have escalated to how they are now.
Hye Jin's eyes shifted inside her lids before she slowly opened them. Namjoon quickly wiped his thumb against his joggers before she gazed at the man confusedly.
"You're still here?" He bites his lip, shrugging his shoulders. "Where do you sleep?"
Her voice was soft and raspy with sleep. Namjoon tried not to think about it so much. "I just slept here."
"On the floor?" A brow cocked.
"Yeah, I didn't want to impose." Namjoon raises himself off the ground, his knees cracking as he stands.
Hye Jin just shakes her head, propping herself on her elbow.
"You should rest." He mutters.
"I've been sick before I can take care of myself."
Namjoon doesn't argue. This conversation was oddly familiar.
He walks inside her kitchen, pulling out certain groceries from the other day. Namjoon could hear the pattering of the rain slapping against the roofs and windows as he tried to calm himself.
"What're you making?"
"Soup." He says nonchalantly. "It'll help you feel better."
Hye Jin can feel the tension seeping into her pores. But she doesn't understand why. How did things change in a matter of a few days when she was barely conscious.
She knows Namjoon hadn't pulled anything suspicious. Her body was relaxed beside the chilled aches she would feel from time to time because of her fever.
Hye Jin knows Namjoon, and he would never pull a stunt like that.
Ever.
She slowly gets up from her position on the couch, her legs wobbling slightly from lack of use. Hye Jin also was dizzy, her brain spinning around in tight circles.
"Lay back down." He growled in a low register.
Hye Jin hmphed, walking inside the kitchen before her uncalculated feet misstep and caused her body to slip on nothing.
Namjoon quickly caught her, her face landed on his chest before he slowly made his way to the ground to steady the both of themselves.
Hye Jin's eyes fluttered shut, his scent wafting in her nostrils as she laid against his broad chest. Her nose wrinkled at the tinge of cigarette smoke entrenched on his shirt.
"Sorry." She murmured. Snapping her eyes open.
Namjoon seemed worried, as he gently stroked her dark hair. "I told you to relax. Your still sick." His words were stern yet the tone was genuine.
Hye Jin nods, gripping fistfuls of his black band shirt. "I just want to help you out."
The man lets out a small sigh before pulling them both up. He needed to take something strong. His body was aching again and so was his frail heart.
"I know..." he whispers. He might have extra narcotics in his pocket.
"How 'bout you help me prep the vegetables."
Hye Jin grins before rushing to the kitchen. Namjoon frowns, grabbing her hand and leading her to the chopping board.
His eyes flickered around the whole time he was cooking. He couldn't even pay attention to the digs at his cooking skills or the questions Hye Jin would ask.
He needed to feel his body relax, and his mind to become empty and numb.
"Namjoon, are you alright?" The shorter woman whispered, placing her knife down and plopping the vegetables inside the pot.
Namjoon nods. When was the last he got high?
After the soup is ready, Namjoon serves the younger woman a bowl and makes his own.
"Thank you, Namjoon. I really appreciate it." She smiles warmly before spooning a bite.
Namjoon heart was doing somersaults against his ribcage again. He couldn't ever love her and truly cherish the way she needed to.
He chews his lips before heading to the bathroom. "I'll be back, okay?"
He slams the door shut as he digs inside his pocket for something. He curses, his pockets both being empty.
He sniffs before running his hands through his hair. He was so...frustrated.
He needed to get rid of this pent up anger and-and self-hatred he had boiling within his chest.
He didn't want to hurt Hye Jin, yet he couldn't take a blunt break outside while it stormed.
He sighs, hearing a voice call out his name. He groans before rubbing a hand over his face.
He opens the door, hurrying to the kitchen. "Hey, couldn't work your sink." He lied and Hye Jin saw through it.
Getting up, she inched towards Namjoon, holding onto his shoulders and massaging the back of his neck, staring up at his distant eyes.
"Is everything...okay?" She repeats the same question from minutes earlier but Namjoon can't control himself from letting a strangled noise escape him.
Not when her hands were working wonders.
"Joonie?" She whispers softly, the nickname rolling off her tongue.
Namjoon snaps his neck up before his gaze darkens. He grabs her hips and pulls her closer. Hye Jin squeaks as his lips brush against her tender neck.
"Namjoon-"
"Hye Jin, I know my feelings for you are real." He laid soft kisses against her jawline, before letting his tired head drop on her chest. "Please tell me you feel the same." He murmured on her skin, his breath warm and airy.
"Namjoon-"
"Or just pretend." He began to babble to himself, hugging the curves of her waist, "You don't have to love someone like me. You're so beautiful, delicate, and pure. I am not."
He pressed his body close to hers, lifting his head slightly to kiss a spot behind her ear as she shivered. "Please let's pretend."
Hye Jin palmed his chest, before fisting his clothing. "I ca-can't."
His mouth left a sharp pop noise after he pulled back from sucking a spot behind her ear. "You don't like me, huh. I read the signals all wrong, yeah?"
Hye Jin eyes widened before she shook her head, "No it's not like that-"
"No it's fine Hye Jin," he pulls an Oscar award-winning smile before whispers. "I knew I flew too close to the sun. Yet, it felt so warm...so comforting." He brushes his thumb against her round shoulder, before shifting his eyes back to her. "I guess I'm just the foolish one."
He pulls back before making his way out the door. Both of them wanted to speak but neither of them had the courage.
A:N How'd you all like this chapter? I really love reading everyone's comments! Thanks for reading.