Under Ayuna's guidance, Shiraishi started studying and performing his assignments diligently. At their final wound cleaning, Ayuna gifted him a gold gauntlet that would ensure his gash wouldn't tear open and he could continue his training.
Only later did Shiraishi find out that Ayuna had to surrender all of her jewelry to commission the gauntlet. When he knew, he vouched to excel, knowing she was entrusting him with her faith.
His break came when senior angels started to assign him higher-level tasks. When Shiraishi proved himself trustworthy, he became their deputy, then their peer, until he eventually re-entered the Creator's radar.
Right away, He recognized Shiraishi to be the petty thief who once tested His sword. Amused with his improvements, the Creator decided to put this headstrong angel to the test.
Shortly after, the Creator started giving Shiraishi direct orders and he succeeded every time, accumulating accomplishments like metaphorical trophies. With each win, he climbed further up the ranks until he began to lead other angels. Combining his glowing achievements with his robbery tale, Shiraishi became a legend in the Garden.
Throughout his rise to power, Shiraishi stayed humble. Deep down, he knew no matter how much admiration he received or how much fortune was bestowed upon him, he owed it all to one person: none of this glory would exist without Saga Ayuna.
***
"You're like my left hand now, Alex," the Creator said at the end of a long, silent walk.
It was a particularly peaceful afternoon as they strolled around. The Garden was deserted because it was Masa Masayuki's millennial birthday and festivities were held off-site. With everyone away at the celebration, the Garden was quiet like a neatly manicured ruin.
Shiraishi stopped. "Alex?"
"It's your new name," the Creator said with a warm smile. "From today on, you'll be my other archangel. Together, you and Felix will be my left and right hand."
Shiraishi was stunned: not only was he the first to learn the name of the blue-eyed archangel, but he would also have an equivalent standing.
"But I thought there can only be one archangel," uttered Shiraishi at last.
"Then it's a good thing I make the rules, don't you think?"
Still overcome with emotions, Shiraishi couldn't speak.
"You don't believe me?"
"Of course I do—"
"I hope what comes next is acceptance."
"Yes," Shiraishi knelt down. "Yes. I accept this honor."
The Creator told him to rise up. "Because of Masayuki's festivities, we will have your inauguration next week. Meanwhile, you can take this as proof."
They'd stopped in front of the weaponry vault. Unlocking it, the Creator withdrew the midlength sword that nearly crippled him years ago. "Do you remember this?"
Shiraishi held up his bandaged arm. "How can I forget?"
The Creator smiled gently and nudged the sword towards his bandaged hand. "Now it belongs to you. You've earned the right to own it."
Shiraishi accepted this gift with both hands and thanked the Creator for blessing him with this prestige. His legs were shaking: he had come a full circle.
***
After parting with the Creator, Shiraishi searched for his dearest friend to tell her the earth-shattering news. When he knocked without receiving an answer, he assumed she'd be at the festivities like everybody else. On his way back, however, he was delivered nothing short of tragedy when he ran into her housekeeping fairy: Saga Ayuna was denied entry to the Masa party and was thrown out in front of everyone.
Shiraishi hurtled back to the cottage, thinking she must be broken from being rejected before the entire immortal realm. Circling the hedges to the back of her cottage, he found her weeping on the back porch.
Before Shiraishi leaped over the hedges, he caught a glimpse of Felix entering through the opposite side.
Out of reflex, Shiraishi stepped behind a tree. He watched as Felix knelt next to her and rested a hand on her back. After they spoke for a few minutes, Felix suddenly pulled her into his arms. Ayuna resisted and then recoiled in alarm.
Something isn't right, thought Shiraishi. One minute they were speaking, the next Ayuna was standing up. Before he could decipher the content of their conversation, he was confronted with an abominable sight: tilting up her chin, Felix bent down to kiss her hard on the lips.
They kissed for a long time. Felix had his hands in her hair and Ayuna's hands were against his chest. Lavenders encircling the house swayed in the breeze and sapphire-colored butterflies danced over the rooftop. The scenery before him should be one clipped out of a picture book, except Shiraishi knew they were doomed for hell.
He escaped the crime scene.
Engulfed by flames and ice, his moment of glory was ruined.
Everything was ruined.
Just like that, Felix swept in and ruined his one and only friend.
***
That night, Felix showed up at Shiraishi's new residence to say his congratulations. Being one of the few to show persistence and leadership, Felix foresaw his rise from the beginning. Now, he was happy to have a companion in a lonely eternity.
To his heartfelt speech, Shiraishi reciprocated with a cold shoulder.
Sensing animosity, Felix said, "If there's something on your mind, don't be afraid to say it."
Shiraishi glared at him. He couldn't believe Felix was still trying to act saintly. Standing up, he said stiffly, "Let's go to the koi pond."
Felix obliged without a word.
The koi pond was in the back garden of Felix's residence—the most isolated part of the providence. There, they would be guaranteed privacy.
They walked through the maple grove. Stopping abruptly at the water's edge, he turned and said, "I saw you. With her."
To his surprise, Felix didn't bother with denial."I see."
"You see?!" Shiraishi was incredulous. "That's all you have to say?!"
"I don't know what else you want me to say."
"After what you've done, explain to me how you can still look at yourself!" Shiraishi snarled. "You were Ayuna's caretaker, you watched her grow up... Not to mention, you're an archangel! How could you violate her like that? It's monstrous!"
"Would you keep it down?" implored Felix.
"How dare you ask for anything? You're the criminal here—"
"I'm sorry, Alex."
"Why are you apologizing to me?"
"Because I know you're angry at me, and you have all the rights to be angry," answered Felix quietly. "I know what she did for you and she's the only one you care about. I'm sorry you had to find out this way."
These words shattered Shiraishi's poise. "Don't you dare bring up my past—you don't know anything about it! You'll never be able to understand what she did for me!"
As Shiraishi said these words, replaying in his head was the sight of Felix kissing Ayuna. He was going to be sick. She was Shiraishi's savior, the one who lifted him off the ground, dusted him off, and coached him to become a star. She was his confidante and his best friend. She single-handedly brought him back to life. If it wasn't for Saga Ayuna, Shiraishi would be the scum of this world, never mind an archangel.
For all she did, he was okay to die in her place if circumstances called for it. But of all the disasters that could strike, he never foresaw having her robbed this way.
"You're a shameless, disgusting thief," he spat at last.
"I know. I realize it's an insidious crime."
"Yes, it is. You just sentenced Ayuna to a fate worse than her mother's."
"That won't happen," said Felix firmly. "I assure you it won't."
Shiraishi's eyes bulged. "You of anyone should know something like this can't stay secret! The Creator will eventually uncover what you did and—"
"I'm aware. That's why I'm turning myself in."
Shiraishi froze.
Kneeling by the water's edge, Felix examined his reflection in the pond: the luminescence from his halo was fading and the feathers from his wings were starting to fray. He noticed these symptoms weeks ago: they were signs of his slow degeneration. Sooner or later, they'd be explicit to the Creator. He wouldn't wait until then.
"The clock's ticking," Felix stood up slowly. "I can't allow an investigation to happen because it'll endanger Ayuna. So I'm going to turn myself in and face the punishments alone."
"Knowing her," Shiraishi sputtered, "she'll never stand by and watch you walk into a suicide mission."
Revealing a faint smile, Felix said, "That's why I came to you—I wanted to ask you for a favor."
"What makes you think I'll help you?"
"Because you will do anything to protect her," replied Felix. "As much as I do, if not more."
To this, Shiraishi didn't have a comeback.
Taking silence as agreement, Felix went on, "For what I've done, I surmise I'll be killed without trial." Looking at Shiraishi fixedly, he said, "I know an audit for the mortal world is coming up. Please pitch Ayuna as an ambassador and offer to accompany her on the trip. A few days is long enough for the Creator to be rid of me. By the time you two come back, I'll be dead."
Shiraishi stayed silent. Dead meant his soul would be extinguished, removed from this world forever.
When he found his voice again, he asked, "But how do you expect Ayuna to live without you for the rest of her life? From what I saw, I know she'll be heartbroken."
"You haven't let me get to the last part," said Felix."Before you return, I want you to clear her memories of me—ones that went beyond mentorship."
Shiraishi gaped at him.
"I'll say it again because this is the most critical part: make her forget her feelings for me. I don't want her to suffer."
"Why would you do that after putting yourself through all of this?"
"Because it's enough for me to have loved her and know that she loved me."
"Even if she didn't remember?"
Felix nodded."As archangels, the Creator can no longer access our thoughts or memories. Not so for others. I don't want the Creator to probe her thoughts and condemn her as a criminal. She needs to go on. To do that, it'll have to be without memories of me."
Still in disbelief from his decision, Shiraishi could only stare.
Reading his silence as hesitation, Felix took a step closer and looked him straight in the eye, "Don't think about me—do this for her sake. Please."
Shiraishi nodded slowly. It would be their first and last alliance.
***
As much as Shirahis prayed for it to proceed smoothly, Ayuna caught wind of the happenings in the Garden on their second last day away: the archangel, Felix, had committed the ultimate sin and succumbed to mortal desires.
The verdict was self-evident and there would be no trial: Felix would be killed, his wings plucked and his halo removed. His soul would be pulverized, never to enter either world again. His crime had sent the Garden of the Sun into a frenzy. It was heartbreaking and unnerving to know that human vices had tempted and corrupted the Creator's favorite.
Hysterical from this news, Ayuna intended to charge back to the Garden and submit herself as the criminal, hoping this would rectify Felix's fate. Yet before she acted, the final verdict came as swiftly as death: Felix had already met his sentence.
That last night on earth, Ayuna bawled. She alternated between blaming the Creator for his cruelty to blaming herself for being the source of evil. She refused to eat and to drink. She cried for hours until her eyes were raw and the tears ran dry.
Shiraishi knew she was hurt, but he couldn't gauge the degree of her suffering. Unlike Felix, he was a true angel and he didn't understand love.
He tried to console her and remind her that it was critical to rest so the Creator wouldn't see her as a suspect. But Ayuna didn't care: she wished the Creator would kill her, too.
"If He found out you were involved, He would subject you to a sentencing far worse than death," warned Shiraishi.
"So what?" rebuked Ayuna. "Nothing in the world can be worse than this pain."
Shiraishi didn't know what to say.
Hand clutching the front of her shirt, she whispered, "I guess you don't understand how much it hurts."
"I'm sorry I don't."
"I can't go on living with this pain," said Ayuna in a shaky voice, tears streaming down her face.
When she started sobbing again, Shiraishi moved closer and put two arms around her. Seeing her undone like this tore him apart, but he didn't know what he could possibly do.
"I want this to stop," she croaked. "I wish this pain would stop."
Shiraishi gazed down at her trembling body. Suddenly, he remembered he still had a promise to fulfill. Patting her back softly, Shiraishi shushed her, "Okay, I'll make it stop."
Carefully, Shiraishi stroked Ayuna's silky hair, his hand coming to a stop against the back of her head.
Closing his eyes, he pressed his palm firmly against her skull. He watched as her body went limp and imagined her thoughts disappearing: when she woke up again, she would not remember she ever loved the fallen archangel, Felix.
"Everything's okay now," whispered Shiraishi.
***
Closing his eyes, Shiraishi carefully tucked away the last memories of her.
It was fine for her to forget about him in this life, when she had been removed from love for several lifetimes. He owed it to her to grant her a glimpse of happiness, to build a life she yearned for.
It had gotten colder. His breath turned opaque white in the deepening chill. Brushing away clumps of snow on his shoulders, Shiraishi turned his back on Shitenhouji, the Osaka skyline, and the unremitting snowfall.
He had done his work.
It was time for him to go.
***
A/N: This concludes Shiraishi's background, phew~
Thank you all for reading! ^^