Recap
After several months of rehabilitation, Firdaus finally begins to get her life back on track. Aman, who's about to go back to London for his residency proposes to her for marriage, to which she reluctantly agrees. But on the day of the engagement, Firdaus sends a letter through Jannat saying that she's calling off the engagement and leaves the city, urging him not to come look for her.
*****
The sound of pagers and phones in the A&E
was a part of the daily melancholy in life. He never stopped to look, everything around him was as frenzied as everything inside him. Chaos was normal, so was gloom. But that never deterred his intentions nor did it ever cloud his judgement. Too many things were at stake. Lives of not one individual, but their entire families. One wrong decision, and everything would be over.
Aman, like his friends and colleagues always said, had spectacular skills as a doctor. Not only were his hands swift and trained, but his verbal tone would often save a situation that could otherwise have had turned into a mishap. He was good with words, always had been. Perhaps that is why people loved him and admired him. It was a different story that now he had forgotten how to love everyone wholeheartedly, everyone except one.
It was almost midnight when he wrapped up work and was walking through the A&E towards the back door, ready to go home and rest after 26 torturous hours of duty. But before he could step out he was stopped by a little boy who ran towards him like a gush of wind. A smile appeared on his face without trying as he bent down and opened his arms to pick him up.
"Hey buddy! What are you doing here?" he looked up from his face and saw a woman walking towards them. She too, had a big warm smile etched on her face.
"He was missing you, so I brought him over. I told him that you're really busy right now, but Daniel wouldn't stop bugging me."
"Ahh, little man, your patience is thinning down I see." He patted him as the little boy blushed and dug his head deeper into his chest. "It's okay Sophie, I'm never too busy to meet him. As a matter of fact I was just heading home."
Sophie pulled her lips into a thin smile and brushed Daniel's hair as he kept turning his gaze between the two of them. He pulled his arms in front and gestured that he wanted to go home together in sign language.
"As you say captain!" Aman replied and the three of them walked towards the parking lot.
By the time they reached home, Daniel had fallen asleep despite his excitement just a little while back.
"He's played a lot outside today with the neighbours kids. Got him all exhausted." Sophie explained as the two of them turned around in the front seats and looked at him sleeping peacefully on the backseat of the car.
"He's doing exactly what kids his age should be doing. You should be happy."
"And I am! It's just that...I get worried. I just don't want to let anybody break his heart."
"Sophie," Aman looked at her with a softness in his eyes, "he's an extraordinary little boy. He's meant to stand out in a crowd and be applauded. That's absolutely nothing that Daniel can't do that other boys of his age can. In fact, he can do much more. And soon people will realise that. You don't need words to make friends. Have you seen the way he interacts with everyone? He's a smart and kind child. So you don't ever need to worry about him."
His words gave her a sense of calmness. Aman unlocked the doors, picked up a sleeping Daniel in his arms and went inside the house behind Sophie who had held the door open for him. Once he put him down on the bed and pulled the duvet over him, he turned to leave but was stopped by Sophie's voice.
"Aren't you hungry? Have dinner here Aman. It's still pretty early; you can go a little later."
"I'd love to say but honestly, I have so much work piled up at home. I need to go get some sleep first before I can get to them."
"You doctors are always working." She chuckled. They walked to the front door while Sophie joked about how his work was becoming his wife, and Aman simply chuckled. They said their goodbyes and he headed to his car.
It was a cold night of November, and the drive to home alone made it even colder. He was back in the dark cavernous depths of loneliness. Daniel was the only thing that had the ability to light up his day, even if for a little while. He met Sophie and him a year and a half ago at the hospital when he came into the A&E after a minor fall injury. Thankfully he wasn't hurt much but he was scared, and something about the way Aman talked to him comforted him. Daniel was speech impaired since birth but the way his eyes lit up when he was happy, it was easy to tell when he really liked someone. And Aman definitely made a place for himself in his heart. They grew fond of each other in a short span of time. Ever since then, Sophie kept bringing him to the hospital to meet Aman in hopes that one day, this stranger's kindness could heal her son.
Aman did not have a lot of friends either, he lost touch with the old ones and didn't put much effort into making new ones. But Sophie and Daniel were two people whose company he enjoyed. They had no one else in London, nor did he, so gradually they became each other's family.
He thought he didn't need anyone else, he had his parents and Adil back in Pakistan who came and visited him once a year, Sophie and Daniel in London with whom he spent a big chunk of his time outside the hospital and a few other colleagues who had always been kind to him. He was content, or atleast he wanted to think he was content.
Sadly enough, his heart knew better. It knew he wasn't complete nor was his life. Somewhere not very far, in the same city, another heart knew the same. It was beating, it was living but it was incomplete, waiting for it's beloved.
*****
"Jee maama, theek se le rahi hoon dawayian. Aap hamesha inti fikar na kiya kare."
She waited for a response from the other end, but only got silence. It was only after a while had passed that she heard a reply.
"Fikar kaise na karoon? Tum wahan akele, mujhse itni door reh rahi ho. Tumhe maine hamesha apne aankhon ke saama rakha hai. Tum toh meri aankhon ka sukoon ho. Tum itni zidd na karti toh main tumhe hargiz nahi jaane deti." She sighed.
"Maama, aap jaanti hai na, main yahan kyun ayi hoon? Mujhe apni zindagi ek naye sire se shuru karna hai, apni parhayi poori karni hai. Aur wahan reh kar woh main kabhi nahi kar sakti thi. Aapki aur khala ki yaad aati hai, bohat aati hai, lekin iss waqt mujhe apne aap ko mazboot karna hoga, take main apne kamzoriyon se larr sakoon. Aur aap ne promise kiya tha ke aap iss mein mera saath dengi."
"Woh toh main dungi meri jaan. Hamesha dungi."
"Thank you. Ab aap jaye aur so jaye. Wahan bohat raat ho rahi hogi. Main aapko kal parson call karungi. Khala ko mera salaam dena. Allah hafiz."
She hung up and put the phone back into her purse that was hanging from her shoulder. Walking up the street, she stopped in front of a small, cozy coffee shop and went inside. It was pretty warm inside in comparison so she took off her jacket and hung in on her arms while she stood in front of the counter looking at the menu in front.
"Hi, can I have one small latte, no sugar, and...." She thought for a few seconds, "and a club sandwich."
Normally, she'd be happy with just coffee but the aroma of the food made her stomach grumble and that's when she realised that she had not had lunch. It completely slipped her mind. She thanked the heavens that her mother didn't ask her if she had lunch. If she had asked, she wouldn't have been able to lie and would definitely get a good scolding. Mothers. No matter how much you grow up they'll always baby you. It was only recently that she started to understand her love the way she always wanted to. And although she didn't openly admit it, she would always have the regret of not being able to thank the person who was the reason behind it.
"Okay that'll be 12.50. May I have a name?" The cashier asked, breaking her trance.
"Firdaus."
She replied as she took out her purse from her bag and the lady behind the counter scribbled it down on a paper coffee cup. Firdaus waited with a subtle smile on her face, unaware that just a few feet away, someone had looked up upon hearing her name.
He didn't whether it was because of his pacing heart or did the atmosphere really start becoming warmer, but for the next few seconds Aman forgot how to breathe. The air had become stagnant and stale. He pushed his chair away from the table, slowly and gently. There wasn't much noise in the café, and he certainly didn't want to be the one to cause a stir and draw attention. Holding his breath, he took small steps towards the counter where she was standing, completely oblivious of his presence. She was looking towards the other direction, allowing him to go stand behind her, still maintain a good few feet of distance between them.
Firdaus tapped her feet as she waited for her order to arrive. When the cashier came back from the kitchen, she handed her the cup with a smile.
"Here's your coffee, the sandwich will take a few minutes more. You can wait at a table, I'll send someone to you."
"Thank you."
Firdaus smiled back at her as she took the cup from her hand. But the moment she turned, she collided with something. Or someone. A familiar fragrance of cologne wafted up her nose as she stood against the figure, trying to regain her balance and strengthen her grasp on her coffee cup that was about to spill but got saved in the nick of time.
"Oh my God, I'm so sor–"
she looked up with the intention the apologize, but her words died in her throat when she saw a pair of deep set, brown eyes looking at her. She felt her existence fade away at that moment. The world around her had stopped, her heart had stopped. There was no way in the world she could have prepared herself for this.
She kept staring at him with her eyes wide open. His composure on the other hand, was calm and collected. Aman studied her for the next few seconds. Her cheeks and the tip of her nose were flushed pink against her pale skin, hair was straightened and tucked behind the ears and the hollowness under her eyes that used to be there when he met her two years ago, was now filled with flesh. She looked healthy, almost resembling the Firdaus he had known during school, when he first fell in love with her. He thought he was done loving her, but falling in love with her was much easier than falling out of love. At that moment, Dr Aman Qureshi realised once again, that no matter what she did or how far she went away, he could never fall out of love with her.
Firdaus, who was still in in a state of trance, had her lips parted as if she was about to say something, but the words never came through. Instead, what she heard next left her even more dazed than she was before.
"I'm sorry," his voice rang in her ears. It was deep but strong," I thought you were someone I knew."
With that he took a few steps back with a lowered gaze and started walking towards the door. He did not look at her again. He just left, leaving her standing there with frozen feet. She couldn't tell how long she kept standing there, gazing at the door. Her coffee turned cold in her hand and her appetite had died. The two years she had spent putting herself back on her feet dissipated behind her like dust.
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Welcome back everyone! How have you all been? Super sorry for such a late update, but exams have been keeping me busy. I've finally managed to write after months, and I really hope it can live up to your expectations! Waiting eagerly for your feedback ❤️