When Saturday rolls around, I pace in my living room as half three rolls around. About two minutes later, there's a knock on the door.
As I walk through the dining room to get to the front door, I shut the door. When I get there, he smiles at me and I allow him in "Would you like something, or do you want to jump right in?"
He furrows his brow and asks "Have any alcohol?" I nod and lead him into the kitchen. When he gets a little into the living and dining room, he frowns "Your cousins are still here?"
I hum as I hold up a bottle of Pinot Noir, and a bottle of Bushmills "Wine or Whiskey?"
"Wine." He tells me and I reach for a glass. As I pour him a glass, be asks "Are you a bottom or a top?"
He takes a sip, before I open the bottle of Bushmills and tell him "Hard bottom."
He nods as I pour myself a big glass of whiskey. As I sip, he asks "So, where's your room?"
I give a weak smile, before leading him up the stairs. As we walk through the second floor, he asks "Did you decorate this place?"
I take a sip of my whiskey, before telling him "When I bought the place, it was a complete demo. Did all of the work, by myself."
He gives an impressed look, before leading him up towards my room. When we get there, he chuckles as I sit on the couch, placing my drink on my bed side table.
He toes the trunk at the bottom of my bed and asks "What's in there?" I smirk and he kneels down to open it.
I lean forward to grab my drink as he pulls out a riding crop. He chuckles as he blushes "You're a masochist?"
I hum, before taking a sip of my drink and telling him "In a sick way. It brings me back to my shit childhood."
He cocks an eyebrow to me and asks "Where you-?" I shake my head and he sighs in relief.
"An arsehole, but not a pedophile." I tell him and he gives a weak smile, before I clear my throat "He, uhhh..."
I slide my jumper up to show him the scars. He gives a weak smile, because asking "When was the last time you slept with someone?"
I furrow my brow and tell him "Couple of months..."
He gives me a weak smile, before stepping towards me and asking "How rough do you want me to get?"
I give a weak smile, before telling him "I like it rough."
~
As he uncuffs my wrists, he kisses my temple, softly "You did so good, darling. So good."
I bat my eyes, emotionlessly, before insisting, tiredly "Don't kiss me." He gives me a confused look and I order "Get out of my house."
"Dra-" I look him dead in the eyes with a murderous look and he gives an understanding look, before nodding.
He stands, pulls up his pants, and steps into his shoes. He quickly pulls on his shirt, before telling me "Call me, if you want to do something."
I give a short nod, not even look at him.
When he's finally gone, I reach out to grab my drink.
About twenty minutes later, the two strains of semen are dry on my stomach. The red marker ink on my stomach runs over my scars and titles me "FILTHY"
The clock reads ten minutes until five. In disgust, I stand and walk over to my closet.
After wrapping myself in a long black robe, I step out of my room and down the stairs.
As I walk into the lavatory, I hear a baby whimpering. In confusion, I step back and find Hermione sits in her room, Rose in her arms, breastfeeding under a soft orange cloth shields her modesty.
I press my lips into a fine line and ask "How long have you been here?"
She gives a weak smile, before declaring "'Bout an hour." I set my jaw and she shrugs "It's nothing to be ashamed of."
I take a moment, before giving a worried smile "Please don't tell anyone." She gives a confused look and I pat the doorframe, clarifying "I find it hard enough to look at myself in the mirror, knowing I'm a poof."
She takes a moment to move Rose over to the bed and create a little pillow crib, before covering herself and stepping out of the room.
The first thing she does, is hug me. As she does, she whispers to me "The only person I'm going to tell, is Charlie. Maybe he'll talk you into loving yourself."
I take in a deep breath, before telling her "I really need a shower." She squeezes me tighter.
She takes a whiff, before pulling away and declaring "You smell fine."
I scrunch my nose and tell her "I feel dirty." I motion towards the lavatory "I'ma take a shower."
~
Later that night, I sit on my fainting couch, looking over a couple of files as there's a knock on my door.
"Yeah!" I call out. When Hermione and Charlie poke their heads in, I cock an eyebrow to them "What?"
When they step in and close the door, I sit my files aside. Charlie furrows his brow "Hermione clued me in on your situation."
I set my jaw, before asking "So what? Gonna sprinkle some pixie dust over me to help me accept that I'm a fairy?"
He gives a weak smile, before coming to sit next to me. Hermione sits my bed and asks "How old were you when you discovered you liked men?"
I set my jaw, before telling her "Fourteen."
Charlie furrows his brow and asks "How'd you find out?"
I clear my throat and explain "I took Pansy Parkinson to the Yule Ball... and she wanted to leave early, so we could-" I furrow my brow "We went back to her dorm, and she kissed me. I didn't feel anything... but I knew it wasn't normal, so I pushed myself to..."
Hermione furrows her brow "Did you sleep with Pansy?"
I shake my head, before telling her "Went down on her." She cocks an eyebrow to me and I shrug "Ended up running back to my dorm, vomiting, and washing my mouth out with soap."
They burst out in laughter, before I sigh "Blaise asks me what was wrong, and I asked him why he didn't go to the dance... we ended talking for a moment, before we kissed and I went down on him."
They look at me in amazement and I shrug "It was in that moment, that it clicked."
Charlie furrows his brow and asks "How was it?"
I clear my throat and tell him "Like a big fat lolli." He smirks and I declare "It's was fucking amazing."
He nods, before asking "Why do you hate yourself for being who you really are?"
I set my jaw and declare "My father found out, and he beat the living fuck out of me. Which he would have done, regardless."
Hermione furrows her brow and asks "Lucius was abusive?" I nod and she asks "Why didn't you tell anyone?"
"He was a powerful man." I tell her, before asking "Why did you think I didn't pass over to the dark side until my mum called?"
She gives a pitiful look, before asking "Is that why he kicked you out of the Malfoy Manor?"
"No." I tell her, both of them looking at me in confusion "When I ran back to the good side, I wagged war with Lucius."
Charlie furrows his brow and asks "What do you mean?"
I furrow my brow and explain "When the ministry cleared my mum and I, they cleared Lucius, as well. And, as soon as we got back to the manor, Lucius and I started arguing."
I furrow my brow and continue "He wrapped his hands around me throat and asked if I had a 'fairy dance' with Harry. Made some pretty fucked up remarks, and pulled out a knife."
They stare in shock as I stand up and lift my shirt to show them my stomach. Charlie furrows his brow and asks "Your dad did that?"
As I lower my shirt, I sigh "Yeah."
Hermione furrows her brow and declares "I'ma kill him."