I found that gif and edited and it's perfect and my heart.
It's *cry* the final chapter; but there will be an epilogue which'll be up next week, so that will be the complete ending of the book.
Just a fair warning, keep a Kleenex box beside you, and you'll need to sit for it. This is a long ass chapter (the longest yet).
Enjoy my sweet peas! I love you all!
S x
de·noue·ment
Harry.
Peace.
It was the word that described the atmosphere that surrounded us. It was also the word that didn't even coincide with what was actually happening.
Sounds of sirens were heard in the background, officers questioned multiple people about the incident, paramedics showed up to assess and treat our injuries, and a specific growl was unmistakably identifiable — and who was also the main culprit of the night.
It was chaotic, but nothing could compare to the hell that we were placed in for several weeks. Rather, my fiancée was the one who had truthfully held in to protect and keep me safe. It was hard knowing that I was sitting back and relaxing, while I was oblivious that there was an incomplete assignment that was still on the table — one that originally belonged to me. She was picking up my pieces; ones that I didn't even know I'd dropped them.
She was my hero. A fucking warrior always prevails.
As for Steel, well, it still wasn't over for him.
There were many things that weren't known to him. According to Céline, he was oblivious to the fact that she was working for the FBI; and that in a heart beat, some of his main clients had sent in many forms of evidence to his crimes. Of course, they stayed anonymous, so that they wouldn't be caught. They were all now in a type of a gangly war, to see who will now take the top position.
Another thing that Steel wasn't aware of that Karla was an undercover agent — and that she was, in fact, alive for several months. It was the reason why the FBI hadn't infiltrated from the beginning. They were assessing the situation and had their eyes on everything that was happening, but staying hidden in the background temporarily. It was unfortunate, and a major missed mark on their part, for not jumping in when they needed to.
They were completely aware of what was happening, and the fact that there was no one else other than Vince and Mitch who tagged along with him. So the question remained, why hadn't they ambushed at the same time that Steel aimed at me the first time. The arrest could have been simple; no artwork or structure would have been damaged; and no one would end up with bloody body parts and a bullet wound. I was yet to wait on that to be answered.
"So, you're out of words, Maxie boy?" Céline grinned as we walked up to him. The man was standing between two agents, each of them, holding onto one of his arms. His eyes showed off a murderous glare, and would do anything to have already to see blood flow out of our bodies; but we didn't give him that enjoyment — we never would. He squirmed, trying to get out of their grasps, but it was a failed effort.
You're fucking trapped, you bastard.
"Words? Oh I have words for your beloved fiancé here." He sneered, turning to direct his conversation towards me. "You fucking prick, you ruined everything; but you want to know something fun? I killed your wife. I killed your pregnant wife; and guess what? She was my fucking daughter. Why? Because she loved you so much. Love, the shittiest lie to ever exist. I'm sure your bitch of a fiancée hasn't told you about it. She knows all about it."
"That's great." I smirked, watching his face drop at the slow realisation of my simple answer. "So do I; and you're a fucking heartless asshole for doing that."
"You know?"
"You bet your arse I do. My fiancée doesn't keep a thing from me; if that's what you were thinking." A chuckle left my lips as I neared.
As soon as I was in close reach with him, my fist automatically came in contact with his jaw, hearing a beautiful crack happen. My hand throbbed, feeling fresh blood trickle down from my knuckles, but it was so fucking worth it. "Now that was for calling my fiancée a bitch."
His head whipped back up, gore being an immediate visual, as a crimson hue dripped from his mouth — and it was an amusing sight. I felt the presence of Céline as she came up beside me, a smile wide on her face, placing a hand on my midst of my back. The other then holding onto a gun, fear instantly heard pumping in my veins from her simple action. She wouldn't.
Lifting the weapon, she emptied the bullets out, the metal pieces clinking together as they hit the exquisite flooring. She looked at the gun, at Steel — who's expression remained ruthless — at me, then back at the weapon again.
"What? Afraid to shoot me?" He snidely chuckled, spitting out the built up liquid. In my personal opinion, with the exact position he was in, nothing about this was comical.
"No." She chuckled and brought the gun up, resting her chin on it. I had absolutely no idea what was going on in her head; but whatever it was, I knew it was going to be good.
Without warning, her filled hand flew quickly and jabbed Steel's jaw in the opposite direction I'd hit him. My brows lifted in astonishment and lips pressed tightly together as the sound of another crack was heard, grimacing at the imaginable feeling.
Fuck; that must've hurt.
"That is for every single thing you put Harry through." She spat, then neared him even further, the same hand thrusted him right in the crotch. Well fuck.
Every single person nearby winced at her action — who wouldn't? The officers who were holding onto him, struggled to keep him standing from how he was crouching down in his spot.
"And that's for Amber, who had a pathetic excuse for a father."
"Nothing for you?" His voice was hoarse, choking out his question.
"No." Her head shook, looking at him intently. "You being imprisoned for the rest of your life, knowing that the world is safe from having you behind bars, that's for everyone. Bye bye, dearest Maxie boy. Rot well!"
She waved her hand towards him, as the officers drug him away, towards the entrance, shoving him into a federal vehicle. Fucking finally. I looked towards my girl, cocking my head to the side, a smirk apparent on my face.
"You nailed him with the gun, eh?" I grinned.
"Well yeah; I didn't want to break a nail." She shrugged, explaining as if it were quite obvious. I knew that Céline wouldn't have given a shit about her nails breaking, but she just wanted him to endure pain that would last a little bit longer. I simply chuckled and pulled her to my chest.
"That's my girl."
"Let me look at your hand." C spoke, reaching out for it.
"Baby, are you going to do one of those cliché moves to take care of me, leading to a make-out session while you stand between my legs?" I smirked and her brows raised at me.
"Oh, my sweet love, you're delusional. I said I just want to look at it, not make it better." An obvious tone was heard in her voice, a smug expression on her face. "Plus, the paramedics already fixed it."
"Is that so? C, get your pretty self back here."
"Why?"
"Because you don't want to know what will happen to you otherwise."
"Is that a threat?"
"No." I shook my head. "But, I think we both know what I'm capable of doing when we get back home."
"Oh sweetheart, I can finish myself off." She smirked and my eyes widened. "It wouldn't be the first time."
Fuck.
"C'mere you!" I laughed, following after her as quickly as I could without causing a scene — at least, one that wasn't as big as the one it is now. It didn't take long for me to catch up to her, before I wrapped my arm around her waist, as tightly as I could without hurting her.
"Struggle all you want, darling. You won't win this." A deep laugh escaped my lip as she squirmed in my hold.
"Excuse me, Harry." A familiar voice spoke from behind me and I let go of Céline, turning around. "I'd like to apologise for everything that happened in the past. I know it was hard to understand what went on and my involvement with regards to everything."
"So you're an undercover agent." I stated, disregarding her apology.
"Well, I guess the cat's out of the bag now." She chuckled, looking out at the scene that had brutally unfolded around us.
"I can't really say that I have any choice in the matter. I guess I'm sorry for almost killing you." I awkwardly spoke in reply.
"Guess not and no harm done. Actually, about that night, it was an eventful one, wasn't it?"
"You know damn right it was. I lived for weeks thinking I'd killed someone, while you were alive the entire time; it put me through fucking hell. So thanks for that."
"Unfortunately in your case, I'm aware of that; but there was nothing I could do about it. All you knew was that I was the enemy. Exposing myself for your emotional stability, would've hurt so many people."
"But you weren— aren't the enemy."
"Correct. I also had to remain as Cindy for quite some time, to be able to go out near the end, to try and finalize the details. The public needed to know who I was, even if this 'new me', isn't entirely a complete appearance change."
"So how —"
"Harry? Céline? You both alright?" Liam's frantic tone was heard as he came towards us from the crowd. The rest of our friends and family followed behind him.
"Ah, Liam. Nice to see you again." She greeted him.
"Hey, Karla. They're good, yeah?" He directed his question to her and confusion immediately struck me.
"Wait, how do you two know each other?" I asked, watching part from their hug.
"Liam's my cousin."
"What?" Céline and I spoke in unison.
"Um, yeah. Sorry I couldn't tell you." His tone was a bit guilty, finally having to have said the truth.
"How the — what the fuck?" I shook my head from trying to process everything; but that was a fucking fail.
"Harry, Liam's the reason of how you were saved that night you were shot and drugged."
"That doesn't make sense." Céline also seemed to be on the same boat as me.
"I contacted Liam beforehand, knowing in advance what was going to happen. I needed someone else to play a role in it. There was no other way to do it. You two are friends and since Liam has many connections, he was the only option to help, and still remaining discrete about it."
"That's why I wasn't sent to a hospital?" I asked, puzzled on how I didn't realise how he actually flushed my system and saved my life. He mentioned a doctor, but nothing more than that.
"Yeah."
"Did you know about all of this tonight and everything?" My question was directed towards my friend.
"No, just only about that night. I didn't even know that Karla works for the FBI. We don't see my aunt so often, even though she lives here. It's all on my mum's side of the family, hence the different surnames. Her mum always said she works for a business company somewhere down south, then she came to me a few days before that night and told me the truth. Funny thing though, I always knew her as Cindy too."
"You have to lie when working in the FBI." She shrugged.
"Hey, that rhymed!" Niall laughed in the background.
Of course he would find that funny.
"By the way, how exactly are we not being handcuffed for, well, punching Steel?" I pointed a finger between me and my fiancée.
"Miss Prescott has already mentioned that it was a possibility for it to happen. From all of the records we have on Steel, there's no way that he can press charges on either of you because of that."
"Cool. The prick deserved it. Always got those guys to have a mean poker face when we played. Bastards." Dylan said and we laughed. "So thanks for that, you two."
"Anytime, Dyl." Céline smiled widely; but our presence within our group of friends, didn't last when she turned to face other familiar faces.
"And why on earth did it take so long for you guys to join in on the fun, while Harry and I were busting our asses out there?" My fiancée turned to the two other agents, who earlier had their grip on Steel. "Or you, agent Renell?"
"Sorry, we got distracted by checking out the Steal room." One of them nervously answered; and Karla's confident demeanour faded in seconds.
"Very comical, Quincy. All three of you deserve to be put on the review board." Céline commented, with a serious tone. "We could've gotten killed."
"Oh, I've already got stacks of paperwork ready for them to start working on. Field work for all of you is questionable as of this point." O'Conell smirked, while the three other, pathetic, agents groaned.
Nodding my head to another direction, I gently tugged my sweet girl who had an annoyed expression on her face, and we distanced ourselves from them.
The two of us stood in the corner of the space, trying to bubble ourselves mentally from the scene. Alone time with my girl was all I wanted in this moment in time. I let my back rest against the wall and placed my hand on her right hip and pulled her towards me. My eyes travelled all over her body, silently inspecting every single bit of her appearance. Our gaze met, realising that she had done the same to me. Her own touch was flat against my chest, feeling as my chest raise and fall as I breathed. Moving to push back the hair in front of her face, I cupped her warm injured cheek, leaning into it. Her stunning eyes fluttered close at the contact.
"So beautiful." I whispered, my fingers travelling over each wound — the ones I could see. I knew that another night, when we could, I would kiss away all of the pain she had right now. I'd make sure she felt nothing but ease and content — and love.
"My handsome man."
"Thank you for saving me tonight, princess." I spoke and a small small showed on her lips.
"Anytime."
..
Days and time passed on; and the only way we could properly count it, was by the use of a calendar. We all carried on with our lives, just as before; but this time, it was with complete freedom.
My fiancée and I decided to take a mini vacation to visit my family in England. It was about time that they met one another, and also for me to see them again. It was only a few months since I'd gone, thanks to the courtesy of C's Christmas gift for me. She managed to get time off from work and luckily didn't have any school work left to do for a while.
I was thrilled that everyone got on well with one another. Even though they had met via FaceTime, but it wasn't the same. Face to face is always the best way for everything — whether in happiness or hardships. Nonetheless, we all had a wonderful time; and as it turned out, it seems that my sister liked her more than she liked me. I told her to remember those words the next time she needed something from me.
My love saw my childhood bedroom and frankly enjoyed seeing the posters of 80's rock bands up on the wall — along with a couple of Mozart and Vivaldi. She also had the pleasure of meeting Cuddles, who was my stuffed teddy and best friend for possibly half my lifetime. The questions then started of her guessing until what age I kept sleeping with him; along with why didn't I bring him to university with me. Needless to say, baby pictures were also brought out; but I wasn't bothered. I wanted her to take a peek at my life growing up. I only had a handful of things I'd brought with me to the States, but the majority of it, remained here.
We had laughs and thoroughly enjoyed our time there, playing random board games — in which I also found out that there was finally someone who was better than me at Scrabble. I did pout at that realisation, but she kissed it away. Though she parted with an adorable giggle, saying "I still beat you."
She definitely beat me. She beat the war I had between my mind and my heart; and she was finally able to persuade my mind to join along to love again.
While we were there, laying in my childhood bed, the comforter covered us — it also may or may not have been too small in size to fully do its purpose — we chatted for hours on end about anything and everything. Even after we came back to our home, that didn't stop.
Céline had later told me about Vince and how he was Amber's twin. It was something that she couldn't tell me before, since she knew that I would question many more things about everything — as always, she was right.
Steel's trial was merely a few weeks after the opening, and he was to serve a lifelong sentence in prison; and there, his grave was already waiting for him — he just didn't know it.
Vince somehow snuck in a pocketknife with him, claiming he wanted to 'visit' his poor ol' boss. Everyone thought it was a bit strange, but said that it was possibly for sentimental reasons. It was sentimental alright. He came to visit his father, only hours after finding out the truth about his past and about Amber. It was told that he had a fit in coming terms of how his entire life has been a lie since the very beginning.
He'd grown up in a similar situation as C, except he never bothered with any further education after high school. I remember that he said that he didn't need it and that keeping in the streets, was what he was born to do. Vince never really had a family, other than his foster families, but they didn't last long. Steel had taken him under his wing just before he graduated and kept him grounded 'like a son' to him. Of course, none of us knew that it was the reality of it all — just as I was his actual son-in-law. We were both lied to, but Vince took it a step further with hate then I did.
After a ten minute visit, Steel had no pulse or blood pressure, as he was repeatedly stabbed by his own biological son. He blamed him for ruining his life — and then did the same in his own hands. Vince was sentenced for a lifelong sentence, practically following in his father's footsteps for similar reasons. The difference was, the son had a smile on his face, believing that he did the right thing in getting the satisfaction he's always dreamed about.
Because he cooperated with the authorities, he didn't get a death penalty. He revealed the location of all of the files, all of the hidden hideouts, and every person that worked for Steel. Each of them joined Vince behind bars, varying their sentencing. At least, him and Mitch truly had a lifelong friendship — a forced one, that is.
Céline and I went to court a couple of times — the only two that were required. I still remember the smirking expression she flashed to both of the boys that helped ruin her life temporarily. Their reactions were priceless as she told them two simple words: I win.
My girl won in so many ways and it made my heart happy to know that.
She got the revenge she wanted against Mitch and personally didn't feel any sympathy when it came to knowing how Vince reacted when he murdered his own father. None of them could blame anything on each other, since they took the matters in their own hands. They made their decisions and no one forced them to do it.
As for me, there came no difference, except for the love that she has for me, faded the remorse feeling that she had. She is well aware of what I did and also knows exactly what I did to get out of it. Like she says, we all make bad decisions in our lives; no one's perfect. We're all flawed in so many ways, but in others, they perfect us — just as how Céline perfected me.
I believed that the perfection I see in her, rubbed off a bit on me, but she denies that — and tells me the same. She helped change my perspective on that as well. Her ability to convince someone in the proper truth, is astounding — as are many other things she does. However, when it comes to realising that she has a thought or did something that's wrong, she owns up to her mistake.
That's why perfection exists within her.
My thoughts were broken up by Josie's voice a short distance away.
Céline and I were over visiting her sister and Liam after we came back from our trip. We weren't entirely up for it, since we've just been trying to keep to ourselves lately. Her and I wanted alone time. It wasn't that either one of us was trying to isolate ourselves from the world, or because we had a mild form of PTSD; it was simply that we truly be just together, even when it was in completely silence while we did our separate things.
As for Josephine and Liam, they insisted on it; and by that, she meant she was cooking one of our favourite dinner meals, that we simply could not refuse. She knew exactly how to pull C and I in — and it worked.
"So, there's something that I've been meaning to give you both for a long time, but I just didn't know when the best time for me to do that."
"J, is everything okay?" My fiancée questioned her sister. The concern was deeply etched on Céline's face, because of whatever was on her.
"Yeah, yeah, it's all good. Um, it's just a video actually — a tape." She replied, teeth biting nervously at her bottom lip.
"Okay? So what's on —"
"It's from Hazel." She spoke, and I suddenly felt my own heart get heavy, and my love get tense beside me.
"Oh." I spoke softly, unsure what else to really say. I knew that C was feeling the same way, but there was just something about this, that made something stir up inside me.
"It was um — she made it the day before she passed. I don't know what's on it; she told me that it was just for you both and made me leave the room."
"So it's a video message from her?" I asked, my voice still low, as I watched my girl remain silent.
"I suppose so, yeah. She told me to get it copied onto a tape."
"Okay."
"I haven't seen an actual tape in ages." I chuckled softly, trying to ease the tension in the air — and to cover the pounding feeling in my heart. Céline knew it though; it was mutual between us.
Slowly, I took the VHS from my future sister-in-law's hand, and held it tightly; yet, so careful, as if it would break like a thin sheet of glass.
"You can watch it whenever you want to. She said she knew it might take a while, but that you shouldn't wait that long." A deep breath escaped C's mouth and she nodded. My fingers reached down to lace them with Céline's, squeezing them as soon as they made contact.
Josie didn't say anything else as she turned to walk away. There was no reason for her presence anymore around us. I turned to my fiancée, gazing into her eyes, easily seeing the anxious look that reflected in them. Her stunning caramel gems were covered sightly by a sheen of gloss — as were mine.
"You want to go home?"
"Yeah." A single word with a single nod, I knew; and without another word, we excused ourselves to headed where we needed to go.
..
The air surrounding us was thick and heavy, filled with nervous tension. I had an old VHS player stashed somewhere in the storage room that I didn't get rid of, knowing that it was one of the only ways to watch family home videos. I believed that the best way to view them, was the way that they were recorded. I told Céline that a while back and she agreed with me; but there was a major difference between us. It was me who possessed videos of my childhood growing up; whereas she, had none.
She only had memories that couldn't ever be physically reproduced, but only said verbally. There would never be a detailed picture for anyone else to see. At times, she thought it was a blessing; but at the same time, it was a curse. There were a handful of times that she wished she could relive and show to the people she loved.
However, she was thankful for the parts of her life that were horrid — and there was no possible way to recollect them. Stories have been told to me, many that she's despised immensely; but without them, they never would have made her into the person she is today. That, on its own, was the greatest gift they gave.
For me though, my gifts are priceless. I have a sister, a future sister-in-law, four other amazing friends, and I had the most precious niece, who I saw as my own daughter and friend; but most importantly I have Céline.
The woman who is the love of my life and the one who I'd do absolutely anything to keep her in it.
My head shook away my thoughts as I pressed the tape into the machine, watching as the telly flashed in pixelated shades of grey. Céline was sitting on the sofa, a solemn expression on her face, but her knee was slightly bouncing up and down, trying to contain her anxiousness. Once I sat down, I placed my hand on her thigh, catching her attention as she turned to face me, calming down from my touch. Her own came to cover mine, caressing it gently. I leaned in to place my lips against hers, feeling the love she has for me radiate through my body.
"You and I, together forever, baby." I paused, resting my forehead against her own. Reassurance was needed right now — for the both of us. The warm breath softly fanned against my skin, as she let air flow in and out of her body. "And Hazel, will never fade from our hearts, I will promise you that. We can do this."
"I know." She spoke against my lips, but we parted when we heard a very familiar voice come from the speakers that echoed in the open space.
"Hiiii! — Wait, is this recording? Okay good." Hazel's beautiful face disappeared as she turned the phone around to double check, then came back into view. Her appearance was just how I remembered her to be. Lack of hair, even paler skin, a nasal cannula in her nose, stunning blue eyes, and a smile — one to make anyone feel the happiness she carried within her.
My heart dropped as I saw our precious niece again. Céline's body froze rigid, knowing that she was definitely struck by this moment. The last time she saw her, was the very moment her soul left little body. With all the care I had, I tenderly switched positions, moving my hand atop hers.
"Hi auntie Cece. Hi Harry, who I'm guessing by now is almost my sort-of uncle? Don't know how that works." A little giggle escaping her lips. A melodically and heavenly sound. "Either way, you'll stay be Harry to me. So by now, it'll have been a while since I've flown away with the angels. I told mum to wait until whenever she thought seemed right to show this to you. I know that it might've taken a while for both of you to heal. I mean, I'm no narcissis — I think that's the word — but I am pretty fabulous; if I do say so myself. Now, it's your cue to laugh. I am your favourite Hazelnut, BTW. I'm sure you've learned what that means, Harry."
Her tone filled with sass, with a timid expression on her face, waiting patiently as she raised her hand to direct us what to do. Which without a doubt, a set of small chuckles escaped from both Céline and I.
"Great, so now that you've laughed, I have more things to tell you; so I'm going to start with one of you. Let me see, innie-meenie-mini-mo. You, uncle Harry, you're first." She pointed towards the screen, moving her pointer finger, to decide; however, she actually landed on my fiancée.
Nonetheless, knowing that whatever she was going to say, was a one-way conversation from her to me. I wouldn't be able to reply to her in a way that she could hear me. It was just a mere past, recorded for real-time. It was when Céline moved my hand up to press her lips against my knuckles. She held on tight, as if knowing I'd need something to hold on to — and she knew exactly what I needed.
"So, I know I gave you a rough time when it came to my auntie C, but you needed it. A couple weeks ago or something, you came to visit me at the hospital, you were about to tell me that you loved her; but I told you to tell her. I'm sure with your big ego — wait, is that it? Mum! Is ego a word? And what's it mean?" She yelled out to her mother, who was verbally apparent that she was standing outside the room. I briefly heard Josie reply with the answer Hazel already had correct. "Yeah, so you have a big ego, and you're broken inside. I get that. I know I'm making this video with me talking to both of you, but I'm just going to say it. I think after being sick for so long, I've been broken too. I haven't told anyone — not even mum or auntie Cece, who now knows. I guess until now."
She set the phone down somewhere, keeping quiet for some time, as her little fingers fiddled together. Her gaze was kept downwards, unable to face the camera.
"I haven't pretended to keep strong for maybe half the time I've been sick, but the rest, you can say I was um-motionally — I believe that's it — drained. I'm tired of all the chemo and being treated like I'm weird, or can't do things properly. I know I'm only eight and there's so much I can really do at my age. I get looked at funny by some of my classmates, which auntie C knows, and she's helped with that. My friend Harry in school, he's like my best friend. I also like him and I'm gonna miss him." She sighed.
He misses you too, sweet girl. I'm sure he does. Hell, I do. We all do.
"I hear mummy talk sometimes, being sad about how she's afraid to lose me. It always makes me upset, because I can't do anything about it. I'm sick and can't somehow mur-cisouly make it go away; I wish I could. Mum's done so much for me, she's my hero. I didn't have a daddy for so long. He didn't want me. I see all these kids at school being picked up by their dad's and it made me sad. Why didn't he want me? I didn't do anything to him." A few tears were shed, some that were rare to be seen by me. She quickly wiped them away with her sleeve.
Sad and salty droplets not only fell down her own cheeks, but to me and Céline as well. I wasn't oblivious to her vocal silence, but could hear her uneven breaths — she, too, was crying.
"B-but I'm happy that you came into our lives. You came and brought Liam with you. I only knew him for a short period of time, but he's the most incredible dad I could ever ask for. Mummy's so happy with him; he's good to her. I wanted to make sure she had someone before I go to the clouds — or the heavens. I believe there's a place where I'll be happy up there." She sniffled, a small smile appeared on her lips as her gaze finally met with the camera once again.
"I have a feeling I won't be here for much longer. I think it's about time honestly; I feel like my purpose on the planet has come to an end. I just want happiness for everyone; I mean, we all deserve it, right?" Her shoulders lifted into a small shrug, a small smile tugging on her lips.
"Yeah, precious Hazel; you're definitely right." I whispered softly, slightly choked from the emotions running through my body.
"So uncle Harry, what I meant to say to you, is that you're quite amazing. When I first met you that night, I was really missing my auntie Cece, which is why I wanted to see her. I told you that I didn't like you, but I didn't mean it. I saw the way you looked at her and I knew you were the one who would always be there to protect her. You made mistakes, but we all make them, it's what makes us human — but to be that, we have to own up to them. That's deep I know. You know what though? Someone taught me that and it's my pretty auntie sitting next to you. She taught me a lot of things in my life, even though I couldn't share all of the stuff she told me, I took it all to heart."
"I wanna sum things up for you, because as much as you're cool and all, I want to leave some time left for my auntie C. So um, yeah. I just want to say thank you and that I love you so much. Broken heart can always mend, all they need is a little love." She smiled, a precious heartwarming expression that hit home. "Now, it's you're turn, auntie Cece. Okay, so I didn't start with uncle Harry because I don't love you more, that's not true — and you know it isn't."
"I know you're sad, and that you're crying, but please don't. You're my strong auntie and you can do whatever you put your heart to. I'm telling your heart to stop shedding those tears. It hurts me, because I know I'm not there to wipe them for you." Hazel's voice was pure, but it didn't stop Céline from frantically searching for the remote to pause it.
"Harry, I can't. I can't do this — it hurts." Her held back tears had exploded into a bomb of built up pain and grief.
Seeing her like that, struck something major to the love of my life. I pulled her in my arms immediately, holding her while she cried. I knew she did this every once in a while, but it wasn't this bad. She needed to break down like this once more to finally let go of what she was holding back. All of the stress that was carried on her shoulders for several weeks, was a major toll on her, that she needed her best friend beside her — but she wasn't here.
Several minutes she remained embraced within me, as I caressed her hair, while whispering calming things in her ears. Though, I slowly stopped, wanting to silence to engulf us so that she could hear her thoughts — so that she could find Hazel deep in her heart, hugging her in a way that was unexplainable. I knew, because that's what helped me from breaking down. I didn't need to let go emotionally, because for me, seeing Hazel tell me those things, helped heal a part inside of me that I didn't know was broken. She held mend that part over time and time had gone by so slow, I hadn't realised it — until now.
Slowly I felt Céline stir in my grasp, parting me from. Redness filled the whites in her eyes and tears stained her cheeks.
"You okay, baby?" I whispered, wiping away the remnants of her sadness, and softly pushing back several strands of hair that covered her beautiful face.
"No." She showed a sad smile, shrugging. "But I will be."
"You good to watch the rest?"
"Yeah." She anxiously nodded, swallowing her nerves. Her body shuffled back to how it was, both of her hands, this time, desperately holding onto my own.
With a deep breath, I resumed the video to play.
Hazel remained silent for a few moments, tilting her head slightly, as her gaze was soft into the camera. "Auntie C, I know you paused the video to cry; but remember what you told me. You said that it's okay for us to cry sometimes. I know this is hard for you to watch this, but I have to let things off my chest before I leave. You just heard me tell things to Harry that I never told you before, but don't be upset by it. Don't question or blame yourself from not knowing. I didn't want to tell anyone. You told me to stay strong, so I did so. I did it for you, for mum, for dad, for everyone; but most importantly, for myself."
"We all do things for one another, to protect the people we love; and sometimes we have to lie to do it. So I did what I had to do." She took a small pause before continuing. I could see that this recording was emotional for her as well, as she needed to take several breaths.
"Remember the time you took me to your university and you showed me around? Well, it's something that I know you would've maybe doubted after I passed to stop going to school. Please don't ever do that. Don't ever stop what you love doing for anything, unless if it's what you want — it's what your heart desires. I know one thing though, it's not something that it does."
"Yeah, I know, Hazelnut. I remember." Céline spoke, almost to herself.
"I also wanted to tell you both that the night we were to the Lights at the Plaza, was the most fun I had in my little life. It was the also the night I was a million percent sure it was the night you fell in love with each other, even if you didn't know it yet — the both of you. I'm just glad I was there when it happened." Her wide smile was so bright and infectious, that it kept tugging at my heart.
"I don't know when mum decided on giving this tape to you both. It could be a few days, months, or maybe years. Don't be upset with her with how long she took, because she knows you both so well. Oh, um, her phone battery is gonna die — she needs to charge it more often. I think she's getting old." She groaned, shaking her head at her mother's forgetfulness. "But shh, don't tell her I said that."
"Anyway, I want you to know that even though I'm gone, I'm still watching over you both. I'm still there making sure that Harry's treating you well, auntie Cece — even though I know he already is." She grinned widely and it only made me smile.
"So I gotta go, but that doesn't mean goodbye — s'just a see you later! You never say goodbye to people you love. I love you both this much!" Her arms spread wide, emphasising her affection towards us, before blowing several kisses at the camera. "Love you always and forever; Nutella, Hazelnut, Hazel, signing out!"
The screen went black as the video ended. Silence surrounded us, yet again. I waited patiently for Céline to say something and break the quietness. It wasn't going to be me to do that. As much as the past several minutes were about both of us, to me, it was solely about the precious girl sitting next to me.
Slowly, she looked up with a couple of fresh tears wetting her blushed skin. That, however, didn't surprise me; what did, was her lips slightly curled upwards as she looked at the telly.
"See you later, Hazelnut." Céline's voice was low, sending the smallest wave in return towards her niece — who remained in her heart. She then turned to face me, seating herself cosily onto my lap. Her quiet and affectionate actions assured me of what to say next.
"I'm doing a pretty good job. Right, sweetheart?" I spoke softly to her.
"Definitely, ma lune." She leaned to kiss me — a kiss that was pure as could be. "You definitely are."
..
Rain.
It wasn't just a light drizzle tonight, it was full on pouring. Thunder and lightning accompanying it. The thing was, it wasn't that strange. The season of autumn was near to start, and a storm was occurring just before so. In actuality for the Kansas City weather, the temperature stayed warm for quite some time, until October enters — that's when it truly starts to change.
The leaves briefly started to fade into a tangerine tone, the sage green fading to a burnt orange, drying out to crunch underneath our feet as we walked. The grass, however, remaining virescent from the hydration it absorbed from the sky. It was my favourite season that I loved when it came to visit every year, one that my fiancée and I both enjoy very much. All of the things she takes pleasure in doing during this time of year, are moments we spend relishing it together. Occasionally, the rest of our group of friends and family would join us.
Faint sounds of police sirens were heard in the background, but otherwise, the volume of the atmosphere was loud — and only of the outcome of a violent downpour. The clouds moved quickly above us, but would only show when a flash of lightning illuminated the darkness of the night. Humidity consumed the air, thickening our breathing, but we pushed past it to enjoy the view ahead of us.
It was all so familiar, but so different as we sat underneath the tent I'd set up. Céline just to the left of me, as she always has been since the day I first saw her here. Gusts of wind were minimal, as it softly grazed against the white fabric surrounding us.
My arm was around hers, embracing her like I did for the first time, so many moons ago. However, that illuminating sphere, was hidden behind the grey clouds on this stormy night; and things had changed since then. I'd stopped smoking, got clean, left the gang and my abhorrent past behind; and moved on emotionally, with my heart that had accepted the love it received, before my mind would allow it.
"To think everything started right here. To think that we started right here." Céline's soft voice broke the silence that encircled us, as her focus remained on the thousands of water droplets that fell forcefully from the sky.
"It felt like ages ago." I agreed.
"Yes, it was."
"You were so uptight back then, miss C." I commented with a chuckle, but she lightly pinched my thigh at my choice of words.
"And you were such a mystery back then."
"Touché, my love." My hand took hold of hers, placing a kiss atop of it. "Hey baby?"
"Yeah."
"Knock knock." As soon as the words left my lips, her head quickly raised from my shoulder, playfully glaring at me.
"Fuck. Really, H?"
"Darling, you know I'll never stop." A grin was wide on my face. "Now, knock knock."
"Who's there?" She sighed.
"Leena."
"Really, you're bring—"
"Shut up and say the line." My eyes narrowed at her, watching as she bit her tongue at my firm reply.
"Why do I even bother? Leena who?"
"Leena little closer and I'll kiss you." I smirked and she laughed loudly, then moved towards me, placing her soft lips on mine, whilst whispering, 'smooth' against them. As soon as we parted, my expression returned and she knew exactly what I was going to say again.
"Knock knock."
"Always two." She groaned. "Who's there?"
"Finally you're getting the hang of it, love." I grinned. "York."
"York who?"
"York coming over to my place tonight, yeah?" My expression wide as the Cheshire's Cat's.
"Wow, that's cheesy." Her eyes widened at my corny joke. "You know that's a horrible pick up line, yeah? But the answer is yes. We live together, just in case you forgot."
"I'll never forget, love."
Tranquility returned between us, but it didn't last for long when C spoke out once more.
"Harry, do you think that it was fate that brought us together?" She asked softly, her view already back out at the rain ahead of us.
"Maybe." I replied. "Maybe it was fate, or destiny, or some strong magnetic force; but whatever it was, it knew that we were meant for each other. It knew that our hearts were always beating for one another. It knew that we could never stay apart for whatever reason that ever tried breaking us apart. It knew that deep down inside, our love for each other, could never be given to another soul — it would always be from you to me and from me to you."
"Maybe it was Darius, too."
"I make a beautiful speech and you say —" My brows furrowed. "Wait, did you say Darius? He's a cab driver, right?"
"Yeah." Her head tilted in confusion. "You know him?"
A short laugh escaped my chest. "His sister is our neighbour."
"Now that's a small world. How did I not know that? Or even see her." She bit her lip in curiosity. "Wait, that means —"
"That bastard." I laughed out loud, with a melodic sound coming from my love.
"Guess he saw that we had a spark from before we met."
"I'm glad he did; and that Jamie fucked up his chance with you — turned out well in my favour."
"That, it definitely did." Her lips were curled upwards as she gazed into my jade eyes — her own glistened, the glimmer of the shower in reflection.
"You're so beautiful." My hand cupped her cheek, gently caressing it with my thumb, as I leaned forward slightly to rest my forehead against hers. Through the thickness of the air, I was still able to take in her soft floral and adoring scent — an aroma that I could pick up from anywhere. "My pretty girl."
"My handsome man." She whispered, her warm breath tickled my chin. "The love of my life."
"On the contraire, mi cielo, you are the love of my life."
"I think we can agree to disagree."
"Seems to be so."
"I'm glad I let you share this bench with me." I smile, a slight smirk tugging at my lips.
"I'll always share this bench with you..." The tip of her nose gently brushed against my own. "...and I'll always share my heart and my soul."
There were no words left to say to her before I crashed my lips against hers, kissing her with utmost passion and fervour; however, leaving lust on the side. Love was all I desperately wanted to deliver in my physical message. A message that could only be delivered and received in this intimate manner; one, that two people who are greatly in love, could only understand.
This heavenly woman who's lips are on mine, is my source of comfort in every possible way. She is the something — the someone, who my heart was looking for, even though my mind had no idea. She is who I desperately needed to live and to survive. She is the only person who I need to make me feel myself. She is the one who saved me when I thought I was a lost cause and could never be healed. She is the one that taught me that hearts could mend, cure, and to learn to love again — to love honestly.
No longer did my mind think that she was just a friend; Céline is so much more than that to me. She is my companion, my best friend, my soulmate, my everlasting hope that good truly did exist in the world. Having her beside me, makes it seems like the whole world is smiling, even though there's a natural disaster happening somewhere.
Good and bad can coexist; but it's how we want to perceive and act upon them, that is what makes all the difference.
Our actions speak more than words could ever do. We have the power in our own hands to steer the boat, that is our life, in the direction we want it to.
We can choose to sail the deep azure waters without someone and be happy; or we can bring along someone who we know will never fail to let us drown — one who will always end up saving us.
Lightning blazed in the sky, a roaring clap echoed in the atmosphere, rain flooding the grounds, and a warm touch by the love of my life. All happened in sequence, as I then wrapped my arm around her, and pulled her even closer to me.
Because well, C, she's my unique azure saviour.
..
A/N:
Well that final chapter was a rollercoaster of emotions, yeah? Yeah.
What was your favourite part of the chapter? Tell me! And did I do it justice?
And as for why there wasn't a 'the end' at the end, well, I believe epilogues are the proper and actual way to conclude things (for me that is).
I'll be doing a Q&A at the very end. They can be directed towards me, about the book, or even the characters. Imagination is key! Comment them here or PM me, whichever you prefer!
"I think you should know by now that I love those little stars more than anything!" Hazel giggled from afar.
Until next week!
S x