15; just company
"Get off of me," I whispered quietly.
Ryan lifted his head and looks at me, without moving an inch.
We were both just laying on the floor, staring at each other with our faces barely two inches apart.
I wasn't sure how long we laid in that position until the door opened.
I budged but Ryan did not.
"What?" a girl's voice surfaced in heartache, "You guys-"
Kate was a loss for words when Ryan finally turns around. He pushes himself off of me and looks over at her, "Babe," he says helplessly.
Just like any other significant other would, she stomped off from the scene leaving Caleb staring at us with his jaws wide open and drinks in both of his hands.
"What happened?" Leah pushed herself through the door and saw us both on the floor.
"I can explain," I said like any guilty person would ever.
Leah helps me up as Ryan stood himself up. I looked over at Ryan and saw the redness in his cheeks. He gritted his teeth and tightened his wrist, walking over to me.
"Get out of my fucking life, will ya?" he threatens, "This is all your fucking fault. Go back to your needy of an ass boyfriend. Shouldn't have came to hang out with us in the first place."
Just then, Caleb puts his drink on the table and grabs Ryan's arms, "Don't listen to him, he's just mad."
I watched as Ryan escapes from Caleb's grip, and ran out the door to chase Kate.
I looked over at Leah who looked at me slightly sad. It was true, I've neglected them but most importantly, Leah after I started officially dating Dylan.
The only person who had my back for all these years, was Leah.
"I'm sorry," I said to her, "I know I've been gone-"
"Juniper," Leah sighed and looked at the ground, "I really don't want to talk about it."
I immediately stopped myself from talking and got up. I couldn't handle the tension in this room, or around these people anymore. Before a tear was able to shed from my eyes, I blinked it back and searched for my boyfriend.
Speaking of my boyfriend, Dylan was standing outside of the lounge, waiting for me.
"Dylan," I frowned and walked up to him, I was about to cry until he backs up slightly. He didn't look happy.
"Is it true?" he says to me, with disbelief in his voice.
"It wasn't on purpose," I claimed, tears actually starting to fall from my eyes now, "He lost balance and we both fell and we just ended up like that, there was nothing more."
"No, Juniper," Dylan bites his lips angrily and grabs my hand, dragging me down the stairs.
After stomping through the big house, and outside the front door, Dylan immediately loses his temper.
"I loved you!" he furiously says, trying his best not to scream, "I know we've only dated for two months but I was falling Juniper! Hard."
I looked down at the ground, "Nothing happene-"
"Why did you play me?" Dylan asks me, quieter this time. He grabs my arms softly, and slightly shakes me, "Why did you play me?"
"Dylan," I looked at him, confused, "I don't know what you're talking about."
"Right before we dated, I told you, I whispered to you to not play me, to not play with my feelings," he choked up in anger.
"Play?" I furrowed my eyebrows.
"Why would you pretend to date me?" he asks, in a more calming voice, but it did not take away the fact that he sounded hurt.
Just then, my heart felt like it had stopped beating. How did he know? And even then if he's found out, I thought I made it clear that I genuinely liked him.
I knew it was going to get back at me someday, but not now, not during this mess.
"I was planning to tell you, but I-" he cuts me off.
"When Juniper?" he crosses his arms.
This was exactly what I deserved.
I couldn't answer his question because I didn't know when I was ever planning to tell him. I was never planning to tell him. I wanted to keep it a secret and hopefully it would have faded away.
"Why would you even do that?" he looks up at me, frowning with his hands in his pockets.
"Because of the pictures," I said quietly, averting my gaze to the floor.
He takes a step closer to me, "What pictures?"
His voice had changed from a rather hurt and angry tone to a serious one.
"You took pictures of me on our first date," I looked back up, furrowing my eyebrows in confusion as I kept my gaze on him.
"Juniper," Dylan's facial expression had changed the moment he realizes what I was talking about.
"I'm sorry," he apologized, slapping his thigh upsettingly.
So now what? We were both in the wrong.
Tears were dripping from my face. The realization of Ryan, Leah and Dylan's anger towards me made me feel even worse that I wouldn't have anyone to fall back on after this moment.
"I'm sorry," I apologized back to Dylan.
There was a moment of silence between us. I knew it was unhealthy for us to continue this relationship with the trust issues coming in between our ways.
"Do you think this can continue?" he asks me, grabbing my arm and rubbing it gently.
"Us?" I asked.
He nods slowly.
"I don't know," I trailed off, grabbing his hand.
As this point, I was sobbing quietly as he was just sad.
"I don't either," he frowns at me and looks at the ground.
"I actually really liked you," Dylan admits, under his breath.
"Me too," I replied, also quietly.
Our surroundings suddenly got quiet as we both felt like we had nothing else to say. We were both sad, and we were both heartbroken. Him a little more than me.
"I'm sorry," I apologized again.
Dylan grabs my hands and smiles weakly, "Let's just end it here."
I looked into his eyes, trying to find some sort of regret in them, but there wasn't any. He wanted to break up, and I knew it was the right thing to do. But it didn't help that I've finally started liking a guy after seventeen years of not having random relationships.
"Okay," I ended up answering, nodding my head as I let go of his hands.
Dylan passes me a sad smile and puts his hand in his pocket, "Do you still need a ride home?" he asks.
I shook my head no and told Dylan to go home first. I wanted to be alone, and I definitely did not want to go home looking like a mess.
He nods and makes his way to the parking garage near the house.
I was never left alone to handle a problem on my own before. If I had to deal with my feelings, I usually go talk to Leah. When I need relationship advice, I usually go to my mom, whenever she is home. When I needed assistance in anything, I usually depended on Joseph. But now, I felt like I needed to just be alone, or at least someone to cry next to.
Dylan is gone. I can't tell him to come back to just watch me cry, my pride is too strong for that. I played him and I can't be the one to beg for him back.
Leah is disappointed in me. I would be ruining her time at the party with Jacob, if I called her to come here to talk about my feelings. Listening to me venting about my mistakes that she's tried to pull me out of, is probably the last thing she wants to hear from me right now.
I sighed and sat down on the curb of the driveway. I looked ahead and saw nothing but cars parked in this dark area. I rubbed the tears from my eyes and looked down at the floor.
I was sad, but I was done with crying. I didn't want to cry anymore because crying wouldn't solve bad things that I have done to my friends, and my now ex-boyfriend.
Maybe I was never made to be in a relationship.
Seventeen years of my life, I have only dated five guys; one that I truly liked, being Dylan. The rest of my relationships only lasted for well over five days, mostly because I never really liked any of them to begin with. It would usually consist of eating lunch together, holding hands between classes and that was it.
Dylan, I actually fell for him. I liked him as soon as I laid eyes on him and there was nothing more that I could ever wish for but to just get a second chance.
Just then, I heard footsteps stomping from beside me. It was a pair of heels. I watched as the girl made her way towards her car. I could recognize the beautiful black hair from anywhere. She didn't look back once as she left the party scene, and I didn't even get a chance to apologize to her.
I barely even met Kate, but I guess you can't be friends with everyone in this world.
I sighed and brought my knees up to my chest.
I heard another pair of footsteps, however they were much more quiet and less click-y than heels.
With the warmth I was feeling on my right side, I noticed that the blonde boy sat himself next to me as he watches his girlfriend make her way towards her car.
By the look of it, it seems to be like it is his ex-girlfriend now.
I looked over at Ryan, who kept his gaze in front of him. He still looked down, but he looked a little more sad than angry.
Ryan reaches into his jacket pocket and pulled out two little lollipops, I'm assuming originally for him to share with Kate.
He holds both of them out for me to pick one.
I didn't ask him any questions, and he didn't bother to look at me.
I reached out and grabbed an orange lollipop, unwrapped the candy and put it in my mouth. The taste of the sweet and sour lollipop hit my tongue as I felt a little distracted from my feelings.
There we were, the "cupids" of our friends group sitting together, upset with each other, yet comforted by each other's company. Hearts both broken on the same day.
Ryan's presence wasn't something I asked for.
But it was something I needed.
Just company.
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