Private Angel Log Entry Four
I don't know why I am still writing in this log since its contents are no longer secret, but it seems it has become habitual, and I have no other way to pass the time right now. At the very least, if I don't make it out of this alive, I pray that Gerard will find this, so he will know what truly happened, and how much he means to me.
I never thought things would end up this way, but there is no turning back now. All I can do is press onward and hope this ends better than it began.
I will now record the events that followed after Gerard and I parted ways for what we assumed would only be a few hours....
I winged my way back to Heaven in a daze, replaying the kiss Gerard and I shared over and over again in my head. It had been absolutely magical, and I would never forget it, but I wondered what it meant to Gerard...I mean, he had already kissed me once before, but did he feel the same budding devotion that had begun to fill my heart?
He was under an unimaginable amount of stress, and he could simply be looking for comfort anyway he could get it, and tonight he had given in completely to his demon instincts, it could have just been pure lust that caused him to kiss me with such passion, and not any actual affection.
I couldn't believe how attached I had become to Gerard in such a short amount of time, but I was done denying it. I mean, I was willing to throw away everything for him without question. He had revived my weary soul, and I would do anything to save his from the ravages of living in Hell. The world had become new and exciting to me, instead of the dull grey existence I had been trudging through the past few years, and it was all thanks to Gerard.
Now that he was leaving Hell, I had irrefutable proof that he was different from every other demon. I had already known that, but seeing him take this final step validated everything I had ever believed about him. He wasn't a bad man, he just lost hope, and that shouldn't have condemned him to a life of suffering.
After arriving in Heaven, I turned my feet toward the Holy Library. I needed to find a place with low demon activity (which also meant no angels would go there) for Gerard and Mikey to hide out in. I waved to Brendon as I entered, he was the Keeper of the Word, which basically meant he cared for the ancient texts the library contained. He was a very friendly person, and since I had been spending so much time down here lately searching for a way to save Gerard (I wasn't having any luck yet, much to my dismay) we had gotten close.
Brendon was a kind soul who abhorred fighting and conflict. I had been sure he would ascend when he came to Heaven, but he had refused, saying that he couldn't leave until his partner Ryan joined him. He loved to regal me with stories about his lover, and I would be lying if I said I wasn't envious of his relationship. I missed the sensation of being in love and having those feelings returned, and the way he so obviously adored Ryan, even after being separated from him, made me long for someone of my own.
I found my way back toward the geographical reports, which held the maps which logged all recent demon encounters. As I pulled out the most current volume, another book came with it and fell open on the marble floor.
Sighing to myself, I picked it up and glanced at the page it had landed on. It was the sixth prophecy from Joshua, which I had read numerous times before. Idly, I flipped to the next sheet to make sure the spine wasn't damaged, when I noticed a glaring irregularity.
Doubling back just to check that my eyes hadn't deceived me, I furrowed my brow in concentration. The book skipped from prophecy number six to number eight...even the page numbers were off by one, jumping from eighty-two straight to eighty-four.
How had I never noticed this before? Part of being an angel was reading all the works of the ordained prophets, and I had never heard anyone else mention this omission either.
Clutching the book in question in my arms, I returned to the front of the library to ask Brendon if he knew what had happened to the seventh prophecy. I was aware that I should have been finding a suitable hiding place for Gerard, but something was nagging at my mind, and I wanted answers.
"Need some help finding something Frank?" Brendon asked.
"Kind of..." I held out the incomplete book so he could see the title.
"I found this over by the maps, and I just happened to notice that the seventh prophecy is missing. It's like someone removed the page completely -" I was cut off by Brendon tearing the book out of my hands. He quickly stuffed it under his desk while his eyes bounced around the room nervously.
"What's wrong?" I lowered my voice worriedly.
"Come with me," Brendon hissed, and I followed him back into a small room that I had never been in before with a confused look on my face.
Manuscripts were laid out on numerous tables in all states of disrepair. Sheets of parchment littered almost every surface, and I deduced this was where Brendon copied down information from the books that were too damaged to place out on the shelves.
"Can you keep a secret?" Brendon asked once he had closed and locked the door firmly. I nodded in reply as he took a bracing breath before continuing.
"I want you to understand that what I am about to tell you, I am not supposed to know. I could be killed for repeating this, and I am putting you in danger by passing it on to you."
Tell me," I begged. Curiosity bubbled up inside me as I waited for Brendon to continue speaking.
"Well...it all started when I first came to Heaven. I began pulling books that needed repairs, and since the library had been neglected for so long, there was quite a few." Before Brendon had come to Heaven, we hadn't had a proper Keeper of the Word in years because of the decline in our numbers. He had only gotten the position because of his lack of affinity for any of the traditional angel jobs.
"So anyway, I found the same error you did in the book, but as I searched for a complete copy, I discovered that every single volume of Joshua's prophecies was missing the seventh installment. Once I had exhausted every other option, I asked an audience with the archangels to find out what was going on." Brendon shuddered involuntarily before continuing.
"They were less than helpful, to say the least. I was already terrified of bothering them...I know how the other angels view me, but I couldn't let such a glaring misprint go without an explanation."
"Not all angels think of you that way Bren," I reassured him.
It was true though...because of his lack of fighting skills, and his inability to use many of the angel powers most of us possessed, the majority of the ranks treated Brendon awfully. They considered him useless, and they weren't shy about letting him know it. I hated the way Heaven's garrison acted as if they were the popular kids in high school, and Brendon was the awkward nerd, so I had gone out of my way to be kind to him, even before I had started frequenting the library so often.
"Thanks Frank," he smiled weakly.
"So what did the archangels say?" I pressed him eagerly.
"They refused to even acknowledge that a seventh prophecy existed! I continued to pester them about it until they told me that I could never mention it again...under pain of death. When I returned to the library, it had been ransacked, and every single copy of Joshua's prophecies had been removed. Luckily, I had one hidden away in my room, and they obviously missed the one you found since it wasn't filed correctly. For once, I am glad of that mistake."
"So that means..."
"That Heaven is hiding something from us. Whatever this seventh prophecy contains, they are willing to kill to keep it secret. Even though it's risky, I have been trying my best to find out what it could pertain to, but I haven't had much luck yet. I know they have hidden the books away somewhere secret...and because of my persistent questions, I am now being watched, so I can't snoop as much as I would like, but I have to get to the bottom of this...it is eating me up inside, and I can't seem to forget it, no matter how badly the archangels want me too."
"Do you have any idea where they placed the books they took from you?" If they had concealed them away, it stood to reason that they might have been placed with the original copy as well.
"Not a clue...there are thousands of secret storerooms in this garrison alone, and I don't have permission to access any of them without someone's consent. I just don't understand what could be so important about this one prophecy, and why haven't any other angels noticed this? Before you came, I almost thought I was going crazy." Brendon hung his head wearily, and I laid a reassuring hand on his shoulder.
"Well now I am intrigued by this mystery as well, so you are no longer alone. I am leaving on a short trip, but when I return, you can be assured that I will be looking into this. I can enter the storerooms at any time, so I will do my best to find where they sequestered the volumes, and hopefully that will lead us to some answers."
"You would really help me in this Frank?" Brendon's eyes sparkled with hope, and it felt good to know that I had been the one to put it there.
"Of course, I am exhausted with all these secrets and regulations. The archangels are getting out of control, and I want to know what is so terrible about this prophecy that they don't even trust us to lay eyes on it."
"You have to be careful though Frank. I don't want you getting in trouble because of me. You can't let anyone know about this before we have concrete proof." Brendon looked genuinely fearful, and my stomach twisted guiltily. An angel shouldn't be so terrified of his brethren...but this was what Heaven had come to now, and I was determined to change that.
"Don't fret Bren, I am good at keeping secrets." I smirked to myself.
"Thank you so much for everything Frank. You are an amazing friend." Brendon threw his arms around me in a crushing hug, and I returned the embrace.
"Now come on, we have been closeted up in here for too long, and I don't want anyone getting suspicious." He opened the door warily, and I saw him flinch at whatever he saw outside. Turning back to me, he held a finger up to his lips before exiting the room.
"What can I help you with Oliver?" Oh shit - Oliver was one of the highest ranking archangels at the moment, and he had a less than pleasant reputation. I couldn't make out his reply, but his gravelly voice didn't sound suspicious, just bored. We had been keeping our voices very low, so hopefully he hadn't heard any of our discussion.
Gradually, the sound of their conversation faded away, and I took the opportunity to bolt back toward the maps I had left on the table. Rapidly jotting down the most promising looking locations, I exited the library as quickly as I dared.
I sent up a silent pray for Brendon, I felt terrible abandoning him with Oliver, but my presence would hurt him more than it would help, and I had to meet up with Gerard in less than an hour.
As I filled a bag with supplies from one of the storerooms, I racked my brain for any plausible reason that would explain why the archangels had kept an entire prophecy hidden from the rest of us. All I could think of was that it contained something they didn't want us to know about...but what could that possibly be? As angels of the Lord, we were supposed to be aware of all the predictions made by holy men, because most of them affected us in one way or another.
If it had been a prophecy that had already been fulfilled, there would be no reason for all this secrecy...so it must be something that has not yet come to pass. Maybe by hiding it, they hope that it will never come true, but making something unknown doesn't necessarily mean it won't happen.
I pinched the bridge of my nose and sighed heavily. None of this made any sense, and I didn't have the time to ponder it tonight. I shouldered the heavy pack and made my way back to my room to grab a few more items.
The last thing I was expecting to see when I entered my quarters was Ray sitting on my bed leafing through this log. I should have sensed his presence before I reached the doorway, but I had been so distracted with the whirling tornado that was my thoughts that I had failed to notice it.
"What the hell Ray?" I rudely snatched the book out from under his prying eyes and tossed it into my bag, desperately hoping he had only just started to read it, but I knew from his piercing gaze that he had discovered too much already.
Silently, I berated myself for not finding a better hiding place for it, but I had never imagined that anyone would try and read it. I mean, it wasn't called a private angel log for no reason.
"I am sorry I invaded your privacy Frank...I really am, but I was just so worried about you. Obviously, I had a good reason to be. Please tell me that was all some work of fiction in there, because I can't believe my best friend is consorting with a demon."
"Just forget everything you read. Please Ray, I know what I'm doing," I begged desperately. If Ray told anyone about this, it could ruin all my perfect plans.
"I can't forget it Frank. It is plain as day that he is corrupting you! Why haven't you killed him yet? I assumed you were just having difficulties tracking him down, but apparently you don't have any problems in that department!" Ray accused me.
"He isn't the one playing games with my head Ray," I sighed dejectedly and sat down next to him. Maybe if I tried to explain to him some of what I had learned, he would see things from my point of view.
"There is no other explanation. You are not the same angel I befriend all those years ago, and the only thing that has changed is that Gerard." Ray spat his name like it was a curse word, and I visibly flinched.
"Please just hear me out. You don't have to believe me, but at least let me explain my side of the story. You owe me that much, don't you?" Ray closed his eyes, and I could sense he was remembering how we met, when I had saved his life from a murderous demon that had almost succeeded in ripping off Ray's wing. He still carried the scar from that day, and I knew he couldn't erase that memory from his mind, no matter how much he distrusted me.
"Fine..." Ray caved in, and I began my story.
As I told him about everything I have discovered, from Gerard's oddities, to the missing prophecy, I began making connections that I had been missing before. Everything had been off lately, more archangels had been seen in the garrison than ever before, and I hadn't felt God's presence in months. Of course, he didn't abide with us, but usually he made an appearance every week or so to make sure everything was running smoothly.
It was as if the archangels were trying to replace God as the rulers of Heaven, and he wasn't doing anything to curb their lust for power. Something strange was happening in Heaven, and I despised being kept in the dark.
"Can you at least admit that all these happenings seem too regular to be a coincidence?" Ray had to see that I wasn't insane, or under a demons influence. Out of all the angels, he knew me better than anyone.
"I concede that you have a point, and I would be happy to help you get to the bottom of it, but none of that condones you spending time with a demon. I don't care how kind he seems, it could all be some elaborate plot to find out Heaven's weakness, or something else just as diabolical, and if anyone else discovers that you haven't killed him yet, you could be put on trial." The fact that he said anyone else calmed my racing heart, and I was reassured that Ray wouldn't betray me.
"But that's just it Ray. I have this feeling that all these secrets and omissions have something to do with him, or at the very least, demons like him. I mean, imagine the uproar if angels knew that not all demons are cold blooded killers. I just can't stop wondering if he is a once in a lifetime rarity, or if maybe we have been wrong this whole time."
"But he's a demon Frank...he went to Hell for committing grievous sins on Earth, so how could he not be evil?"
"Do you want to know why he is in Hell...he didn't murder anyone, or steal, or rape. The world destroyed him, and he took his own life. I know it is wrong, but should he be punished for eternity because he lost his way? Isn't that exactly the opposite of what Heaven stands for?"
"I don't know anymore..." Ray shook his head to clear it, and I was ecstatic that he was actually listening to me.
But my excitement was short lived, because just then, a pounding on my door cut through our conversation. Ray and I both froze in place, our senses told us that two archangels stood outside of my room.
"Frank - we know you are in there," one of them called our gruffly.
"Who did you tell?" I hissed as quietly as I could.
"I am so sorry Frank, I was just worried about you...I told Oliver that you had been acting strangely, and I asked him to watch over you using the seeing pool to make sure you weren't in some kind of trouble. I didn't know any of this at the time...please forgive me."
The door burst open, and Oliver and another archangel whose name I couldn't remember entered the now overcrowded room.
God damn Ray and his good intentions...
I had never even considered that he would be so desperate to find out what I was doing that he would tell an archangel, and as far as I knew, the seeing pool was only used by guardian angels to watch over their charges when they had been called back to Heaven. The fact that archangels were using it to spy on other angels was another troublesome event to add to my ever growing stack.
"Listen closely Frank - you have been witnessed committing the ultimate taboo of fraternizing with a demon. We are here to take you into custody, where you will remain until you stand trial before God." Oliver held out a pair of shimmering handcuffs, and I shied as far away from him as I could get in the cramped space. Had they seriously seen me kiss Gerard...well, I bet that was a shock to these sensible assholes.
"Do not make this any harder than it already is," Oliver asked.
If Gerard wasn't waiting for me, then maybe I would have stayed and pleaded my case, but I couldn't abandon him when I had been the one to push him into running away in the first place. There was only one thing left to do...
"Remember what I told you," I mouthed silently to Ray, who nodded grimly in return. Then, with a resounding snap, I unfurled my wings, knocking down Oliver and the other archangel in the process. Without a backward glance, I pushed off and flew down the hallway as fast as I dared.
I knew I hadn't stunned Oliver for long, and within minutes, he would have the entire garrison after me. Pushing myself to the limit, I hurtled toward where I had promised to meet Gerard. I had to get him the supplies, and let him know what had happened, or he could be caught waiting for me.
It wasn't long before I heard the accompanying beat of feathers filling the air behind me, and I knew my lead was slim at best. Flying with this pack on my back was straining, and I wasn't sure how long I would be able to outdistance them.
Finally, the clearing where I had last seen Gerard came into view, and I sighed wearily in relief. Now all I had to do was warn Gerard away without alerting the other angels to his presence. Hopefully, they would be too focused on me to notice his aura. Now how to do this while drawing as little attention to Gerard as possible...
Deciding that speed was the only thing I had going in my favor, I rapidly dove toward the ground, hoping that the added weight of the pack wouldn't impair my ability to stop quickly. Luck was with me, and I narrowly managed not to slam into the hard dirt, but I didn't have time to congratulate myself.
I could sense Gerard hiding in the trees to my left, his bright red hair was visible against the green foliage, but I was just grateful he had possessed the foresight to stay out of the clearing, otherwise the other angels would have spotted him instantly. I could feel another soul that had a similar resonance to Gerard's, so I knew he had Mikey with him as well. My poor demon looked so frightened that I had to physically restrain myself from running to him and gathering him in my arms.
"Gerard - you need to run," I gasped out as softly as I could while making sure he could still hear me.
I saw his limbs tensing up, and I gave him a minuscule shake of my head, trying to convey to him that he had to stay still. Flicking my eyes upward, I observed my pursuers descending towards me, and I knew I was out of time. Even though there were a thousand and one things I wanted to say to Gerard, I would have to settle for the essentials.
"Things have gone horribly wrong. Get Mikey away from here as fast as you can. I promise I will come find you. Just go and don't look back!" I had to physically wrench my gaze away from Gerard's forlorn face.
Throwing the pack at his feet, I raced off as fast as my wings could carry me while silent tears poured down my face. I prayed to God (even though he probably wouldn't answer any of my prayers now) that I would be able to keep my promise to Gerard. I had to make it back to him alive - no matter the cost.
So that is how I ended up huddled in an abandoned building, recording my desperate situation in this log that is no longer private. I have managed to avoid detection so far by staying as close as possible to one of the portals which allows us to renter Heaven, if for some reason we cannot fly there like we usually would. Its resonance hides my presence from the other angel's senses, and I hope that no one will think to look for me so close to an entrance to home.
But they are still out there...I sense them searching for me. I can feel when a team returns to Heaven, and another arrives on Earth to take their place.
I know that they can't keep this up forever, our ranks are stretched thin as it is, and I am hoping that they will all be recalled to their original assignments soon. I need to get to Gerard before someone else finds him...I have to make sure he is safe.
He calls my name every night for hours, and it is breaking my heart. Every muscle in my body yearns to fly to him and hold him in my arms. I want to stroke his beautiful red hair and tell him that everything is going to be all right.
But I can't risk it yet...even if I am not seen, the other angels could track my scent, and I won't lead them to Gerard, I would die to prevent that. So I sit here and wait...dreaming of the moment when I will be reunited with my demon.
So here is another Frankie chapter for you guys, and did you like how I threw Brendon and Ryan in there? *waggles eyebrows*
I feel like this one wasn't as well written as some of my other chapters (like maybe it is too choppy idk) but I was trying to squeeze so much into it, that I wasn't sure how else to do it.
Just so we are clear, I never paid attention in church, but I am pretty sure Joshua never made any legit "prophecies" but for the sake of the story, I just spun that in there. So please don't judge my lack of biblical knowledge, I basically just googled famous prophets and picked a name haha.
I AM SO HAPPY THIS STORY HAS OVER 500 READS! You guys make me feel so loved, seriously <3
Oh and my date went amazing!! I dragged him to the Halloween Spirit Store, and we goofed around and made idiots of ourselves the whole time. I seriously love that store, it fuels my inner child. My whole family is dressing up as Batman characters this year, so I am going as super cheesy TV's Robin...sexy I know ;) So that was your random dose of my life for the day.
Okay I need to go now, I am rambling...so vote, comment, all that zazzy stuff, and I might dedicate the next chapter to you (because I really need to start dedicating more of these so you guys know how much I love you).
<3 star