"Wait, so you're saying...
all this time...
she was mean because she was jealous?!" Sofie asked, her eyes wide and confused, but I can see a hint of anger and disappointment in there too.
"Yeah..." I shrug in her arms and she pulls me even closer, giving me full excess to wrap my arms around her stomach and bury my face in the crook of her neck.
"We were at her house, it was empty, but suddenly her dad came in, yelling at her for having friends over instead of studying. She tried to tell him we're not friends, and that we are studying, but he wouldn't listen, just kept yelling at her until he had an urge for alcohol and slammed her bedroom's door." I let out a shaky breath before continuing to tell the story.
"So she burst into tears, and I didn't know quite what to do so I just hugged her tight and circled her back until she calmed down, telling her it's okay over and over again." I could feel Sofie tense in my arms. "And when she calmed down we had a heart to heart conversation. She said she was sorry for what she did to me all those years. She said that she did it because she was jealous of me and my friends and bla bla bla." I rolled my eyes.
"Did you forgive her?" She asks, her voice shows zero emotions.
"Yeah." I shrug. "And when I came back from Cami's- I mean, Camila's birthday, the gang and I invited her over to Elinore's after school and it was really fun, and since then we're kinda... well, friends." I shrug again.
She's being awfully quiet.
I took a deep breath.
Usually, Sofie and I have a "heart to heart" kind of talks while we cuddle. It's like, our "thing". Telling stuff we forgot to tell each other, stuff we thought are not important. We found out that almost everything I find not important, she finds very important, and stuff she finds not important I find very important. So it works.
Maybe I said something that upsets her, and that's why she's quiet?
Maybe she's mad?
Maybe she's even mad at me?!
Maybe she's just tired?
May she's ju-
"Hey..." she lifts my chin lightly from the crook of her neck to look into my eyes, as if she can sense my fears and insecurities. Butterflies started running around in my tummy like they usually do when I'm with her. "I'm really upset about everything that Ivory did to you. And all of it because she was jealous! It's just... frustrating. And to be honest, I'm even more upset you forgave her so easily and let her in, and became her friend. You're just an angel and I'm scared she'll hurt you." She sighs, planting a cloud gentle kiss on my forehead. I allow myself to relax into her.
She's not mad at me
She's just upset about Ivory...
I can definitely work with that.
I close my eyes with bliss as her lips tickle mine for a second, in such a gentle way, I almost couldn't feel it , though I felt it everywhere in my bod-The door to my room burst open in a fuss. I jumped in surprise, getting up from Sofie's body and sitting at the edge of the bed to look towards the door.
So much for relaxing. . .
Both my sisters Lia and Maya were standing near the door, a frown is up on their faces and they have their arms crossed. I open my mouth to ask what's the fuss, but they cut me off...
"Lia took"-"and I don't"-"you can't! this is so rude!"-"stop it! it was you!"-"you're annoying!"-"and you're rude!"-"I hate you!" -Was the only thing I understood from their loud yelling, and that only, got me to regret even thinking of asking.
"Okay, everybody shut up!" I say, not raising my voice to the point I'm yelling but making it sound strong and confident enough to make them stop yelling at each other and look at me. I feel a pair of soft arms wrap themselves around me securely as a pair of legs found themselves grazing mine, sending electricity over my body. I took a deep breath to calm my crazy hormones.
"Maymay, Lily, do you remember what I've asked you a week ago when you burst into my room without asking?" I ask patiently, looking at them both and giving them time to process my question. I felt light kisses travel down my neck, I giggled nervously and hit Sofie's arms while I'm waiting for an answer.
"You said that you always try to respect us and we need to try and respect you." Maya nodded, her eyebrow squint together and her face tilted slightly left.
"That's right May... and what have you just done?" I ask, still very much patiently, showing no sign of emotions. I look towards Lia, signaling with just one look that I want an answer from her this time. She was in deep thought, finally giving up and wondering, "we... came into your room without permission?" She tilts her head to the side and I almost cracked a smile. "Right again. So which right did you just took away from me by barging into my room?" I ask and they both look at each other to see if the other has any idea. At the sight in front of me, I couldn't help but smile softly.
Those two cuties are my sisters!
"I'll tell you. You took away my privacy. I have a right for privacy. Meaning; you need to respect my lines and know that just like I'm not going through your stuff without permission or taking toys without permission, you're not allowed to barge into my room without knocking first or telling me. If I wanted to sit and watch a grown ups movie with Sofie right now, you could've watched something that could've given you nightmares. Even if you're really impatient, and want to get into my room right this second... all you really have to do is knock, and wait until you've heard me give you permission to get in. Okay?" I explain, caressing Sofie's hands that are caressing my body as I feel her eyes on me the entire time.
My sisters nod their agreement. "Do you think I'm wrong, or being unreasonable in any of my explanations?" I asked them, looking into their eyes to make sure they're not afraid to say they disagree with me if they do. They shake their heads. I smile wider. "Good. Now let's just try that again, okay?" I ask and they nod again, walking out the door and closing it. I smile -satisfied- at the closed door.
I heard a soft knock, smirking at Sofie and taking the chance to seal her lips with mine, biting teasingly at her bottom one before breaking apart and yelling, "come in!"
Sofie whispered under her breath; "tease" making me giggle right as the door to my room opened and Maya's head popped in. "Hey Katie, can we come in?" She asked sweetly.
My family used to call me each by the name they prefer, (Which at a time drove me crazy).
My mom called me Belle. She gave me different nicknames; like Belly or Blueberry and even Bellbelly once!
My dad usually called me Katheryn and different nicknames, like Katie, Kitkat... (yeah... embarrassing.)
My big sister usually called me Alma, or mí Alma (my soul) cause that's where they got the idea for the name in the first place... her nicknames were; Alal and mama.
And my brother usually called me Abby. Which is also my first name, remember?
Of course my parents loved all of the names (especially my mom) and my dad loved the idea of the name Alma, cause you know, it's originally in Spanish, and my dad and Spanish are best friends. But they all just had their own name for me. My favorite was Abby though.
But... when my dad passed away, there was a time when everyone called me Katie just to feel close to him. They didn't think for a second how horrible it made me feel that someone else who's not my dad is calling me that. Which made the whole experience even worse. And I didn't want to ask them for mercy 'cause I felt like if I can help their sorrow, (even if it's hurting me like crazy,) I should do it. So I did it. I let them call me Katie, even though it made me cry worse at night. And when it stopped I went with Abby, cause my dad always told me to walk hand in hand with my heart, and I finally understood what he meant. And now when they call me Katie, I don't feel like crying... I feel like smiling at the world that I had the best father in the universe. It's just another reminder of how lucky I am.
"Of course, I'm not busy, you may go right in." I smiled at her. She smiled too, opening the door wider to let Lia slide in as well.
"Now... what did you say before?" I asked, leaning my body weight against Sofie, trusting she would hold me -which she did-.
"Oh right!" Maya's mood changed immediately, showing how mad and annoyed she is, but mostly... hurt?
They both opened their mouths to talk, both looking quite overwhelmed, so before I had a Deja-Vu of what happened when they came in, I held both my hands up to stop them. They shut their mouths immediately, letting me speak.
This is all my education, just so you know!
"Thank you. Maya, tell me what happened please." She opened her mouth again, looking quite angry, so I held my hand up again, adding "calmly." Before letting her speak.
She took a deep breath.
"Lia stole my shirt again, and when Natalia came over today, Lia totally interrupted all the time!-" Lia cute her off, tears slipping down her rosy cheeks, "I just wanted to play with you!" She sobbed. "Lily, let her finish." I asked gently. Lia answered me with a small kick to the floor and her eyes wandered to the ground as her hands played with her shirt. I nodded towards Maya, asking her to continue.
"And she didn't leave when I asked her to! She was so annoying and Natalia laughed at me because I still play with a six year old. It was so embarrassing Abby! And she cries all the time! I hate her!" Maya's voice rose as she spoke, but I still looked unfazed, although on the inside I was more than upset with Maya for the way she talked about her sister and the way she treated her. "Are you sure in all the things you told me?" I asked, giving her a chance to back out. "Yes!" She yelled. "Okay then." I shrugged, opening my arms for Lia to run into them and sob quietly. "If you're so embarrassed about playing with Lia, you shouldn't anymore." I said, a reassuring smile on my lips. It's important that they'll both know I'm not mad at any of them. "Really?!" She asked excitedly. I feel another pang in my chest from her words and I guess Lia feels it too cause she sobs harder, her little hands wrap themselves around me in my lap harder. "Yes, really. In fact, if you don't want to be around your little sister that much, I'll make sure you wouldn't have to even talk to her." I say softly, creating a plan in my head.
Sofie is wrapped securely around me still, watching my sisters and I with curiosity and confusing, frowning once in awhile but not saying a word.
"Sweet! Thanks Abby!" Maya smiled at me. I returned the smile, waving goodbye at her as I caress Lia's hair. She waves goodbye back and walks out the door.
"Lily, sweetheart, I want you to look at me for a second and calm down honey, okay? Just for a second." I said gently, searching with my eyes for hers. She nodded against my chest. Still sobbing, she picked up her head and leaned back a little to look at me.
I kissed her forehead, -circling my hands over her back to sooth her.
I kissed her cheek, -her sobbing softened lightly.
I kissed her other cheek, -her sobbing stopped completely but her breathing was still uneven.
I kissed her chin, -a tear rolled down her right cheek again, I wiped it away, whispering, "I love you" quietly and softly.
She calmed down and I kissed her nose making her giggle.
"You are the best sister ever. And I love you. Maya is missing out on a beautiful relationship with you and a fun games partner." I said, my hands going through her hair. "You think so?" She whispers. "I know so. And I'm like, super smart, I'm older than Maya." I said flipping my hair over my shoulder in an arrogant way, knowing it will make her laugh -which it did-.
"Here, ask Sofie, she'll be a great second opinion." I said, pinching Sofie's arm playfully, she smiled at me with that twinkle in her eyes, and I smiled right back, my little sister still over my lap, in my arms, as I lean down to kiss her lightly.
I couldn't stop myself, okay?! Don't judge me!
"Ew!!" Lia laughed, closing her hands over her eyes. I laughed too, tickling her, Sofie helping me out. After she laughed at least as much as she cried today, and I was satisfied, I told Sofie it's okay to stop. We had a moment of quiet until Sofie talked; "you're really fun Lia. If you want to play with someone and you miss Maya, than I would love to be your rebound." She said, winking. I pushed her arm playfully as I tilt my head backwards to laugh. "What's rebound?" Lia wondered. "Okay... off you go little sis." I nudged her lightly laughing nervously at the question.
Before she went out the door I stopped her as I remembered the most important thing.
"Lia wait! Come here for a second I forgot to tell you something." I waved my hand for her to come closer, and she did, sitting in my lap again.
"If people doesn't want your company, or if they treat you with any sort of disrespect-- remember I taught you what disrespect and respect is?" I stopped just to make sure she remembers. She nods quickly. Good.
"If they treat you with disrespect, or if they're mean to you, then they really don't deserve you. You deserve the best Lia. Okay? Don't let anyone hurt you, and if you need any type of advice, or really anything at all, I'm right here for you. Okay? You can always come to me, I'll help you with everything." I reassured her, kissed her cheek. She nodded. I smiled and gave her multiple kisses over her face which made her laugh and push my head away. "Oh! And something else;" I said, serious. She nods, signaling for me to continue. "Maya asked you not to talk to her or play with her... I'm sure you also wouldn't want to talk or play with someone who doesn't want to talk and play with you, because you deserve better, right? we talked about it... so I'm not gonna be mad, and I'm not gonna make you do otherwise if you decide to not talk to her or play with her." I said and she nodded with a confused expression on her face. "Yes, okay. But why?" She tilts her head to the side. "Because what Maya did today was wrong, and mean. SO you're gonna be the grown up and the better person here and respect her wishes. If she doesn't want to play with you it's her lose but you still need to respect her decision. Do you understand?" I ramble. She smiled, nodding her response before kissing my cheek and running down the stairs, yelling out Emalia's name and asking her if she wants to play with her.
I sigh.
Mothering is exhausting...
"Where did you learn to do that?" Sofie asks, trailing down my neck with her lips. I bit my lip as hard as I can to hold in my moans. She didn't even touch me and I feel all horny and Shit. Ugh!
"Um- uh where did I learn to do what?" I mumbled quietly, tilting my head to the side to give her more excess.
If she'll go a bit up with her lips she might get to my-
"Oh" I breathed a moan when she sucked over my sensitive spot, right below my ear, swipping her tongue a couple of times over it. "To be a mother like that." She whispered, giving my neck a last peck before tilting my head to hers so she could look me in the eyes. Tease.
"You know... when your mother is at work until night, and you have four little siblings, you need to be the grown up." I shrug. She still stares at me, her eyes roaming my face until they get stuck on my lips. She leans down gently for a few pecks. "That must be hard... being the adult all the time." She whisper and I shrug again, but then...
I never talked about it with anyone, but I feel like I trust Sofie with all of my heart and I really want to talk to someone. Someone who cares, and will listen, and will put me first. Sofie might even be that someone.
"Actually... yeah... it's really hard. And sometimes it's even super annoying. People my age don't have as much responsibility and worries. But I don't think I would change it. Cause I love them so much, and that feeling when I'm being helpful, or when my little brother hugs me out of nowhere and tells me how much he loves me or when they really understand that what they've done is wrong or hurtful and they say sorry for it... it's just... it's the best feeling." I breath. When did she get so close? Sofie's hand is over my cheek and jaw line, caressing softly. Her other hand is on my hip and her nose touching mine. One of my hands sits securely in my lap and the other is wrapped over Sofie's hand on my cheek. "You're going to be... the most amazing mother." She says, that twinkle is still quite there. "You think so?" My eyes linger over her lips when she says, "I know so" and kisses me. Suddenly, my back is on my bed, Sofie is over me, her legs sits on either side of my hips. Our hands are roaming, tongues are fighting, moans are slipping. I just love my girlfriend... when we hear-
"Girls!! Dinner!"
oh my goddd!!!
What is it with my family and timing?!?!
Sofie giggles in my mouth, leaning back to look at me with amusement.
"What?" I whisper.
"You said it out loud." She smiles.
"Of course I did..." I groan, pushing her off me as she giggles again and going down the stairs.
I went inside the kitchen, Sofie right behind me. I hugged my mom and Amanda with a smile on my lips, kissing Emalia on her forehead as she explains to her friend Miranda how you do an origami from the napkins. "Lia can you please move your sweatshirt from the chair so I could sit here?" Maya asked politely though with a slight annoyance. I went over there, gave Maya a kiss on the head. "Hey Lily" I smile at Lia, kissing her as well on the forehead. She smiles wider, jumping a bit in her sit with excitement. "Do you want to sit next to me?" She asks with hopeful eyes. "Of course I do. Do you mind putting your sweatshirt on the other side so I could sit there?" I asked. She shook her head enthusiastically and passed the sweatshirt to the right sit instead of the left one.
"Thank you" I sat down. "Hey!" Maya whined. "Yes?" I ask innocently, looking up at Maya. "I was going to sit there." Maya's shoulders fell in disappointment. "What?" I tilted my head to the side in confusion. "But I thought you didn't want to be with Lia all the time? I thought it's embarrassing to still hang out with a six year old..." I trail off like I'm just remembering the scene. "Don't you remember? You said you hated her..." I ask, as if I'm surprised. My family gasps and stop their movements. Maya looks around. My mom is already aware I have a strange way of "punishing" my siblings. Where a regular mother would just yell at Maya for what she said, tell her to go to her room until she learns her lesson, or wouldn't make a big deal out of it and just tell her it's wrong to hurt your sibling's feelings like that, I would just teach Maya a lesson, make her truly understand that she hurt her, without any of my help. If I just yelled at Maya for what she did, she wouldn't of understand why, just that what she did is wrong, but she would do it again when I'm not around cause she wouldn't feel how hurtful it is. There's not an actual reason for me to be mad at her, she didn't know how horrible it feels when someone you love tells you they hate you. She also didn't mean it so why would I yell at her? But if I didn't made a big deal out of it, she'll think it's okay, or just wouldn't do it around me because she'll think I think it's wrong, not because she truly understands her actions. So I'm making her understand right now.
"I- um... I didn't mean it." She says, puzzled, and I could tell she was going to cry if all of us will keep looking at her that way. "No, don't cry sweetie, just sit down. You wanted Lia not to talk to you anymore, she's just respecting you." I say and pat the sit that is next to me. She sits down with a frown. I kiss Lia's head and wink at Sofie as she sits in the other side of Lia.
"Okay..." my mom is really confused but sits down nevertheless.
******
"Can you pass me the salt, Lia?" Maya asks, her tone annoyed, but Lia keeps laughing along about Sofie's story. "Lia? Lia?!" She asks louder, but Lia tells Sofie a story of her own. "Hey lily?" I ask, Lia stops her story and looks at me. "Do you mind passing me the salt sweetie?" I ask kindly, with a reassuring smile. She nods quickly, passing me the salt real quick as she keeps on rambling to Sofie. "Thanks cutie." I say and give Maya the salt. She huffs as she takes it with a frown.
*****
"Lia? Do you want to play with me? I'll let you have our favorite doll..." Maya offers hopeful, but Lia just keeps going up the stairs.
"Come on Lia! What do I have to do so you'll talk to me? I get it. I was wrong to say I didn't want to talk to you and be around you anymore, I get it. Apparently I really like being in your company even though you're six years old." Maya says as Lia stares at her. I cough, exaggerating it so Maya would understand, and she did. "I mean, I like being in your company and you being six years old doesn't matter at all, because it's you, and you're my sister and I love you. I'm sorry for hurting your feelings like that, and I'm sorry for lying to you that I hate you, 'cause I don't." She shakes her head. I smile with relief as I lean against Sofie, who's been watching their exchange just like I was, and hugged me from behind this whole time.
"I guess I forgive you then. I'm also sorry for ignoring you today." Lia said and I smiled even wider. She figured out it hurt Maya's feelings by herself. "It's okay." Maya shrugged. "Wanna go play before mom finds out and sends us to sleep?" Maya asks hopeful as if she had the most genius idea. "Okay!" Lia says excitedly, running with Maya up the stairs as I shake my head in amusement.
"See? You're going to be such an amazing mom. And we're going to have the most amazing kids." Sofie's voice grazed my ear and I shuddered.
"We're?" I asked, surprised as I turned in her arms to face her.
"Yeah." She whispered, leaning her forehead against mine.
"Together."
************
you guys i am soooo sorry for not updating so longggg !!!
please forgive me!
i love u all and i hope youll have a great time zone!
btw; how r ya'll??