"hey baby" he says and I cringe
"no im not home"
"im at my grandparents house"
"uh they needed me to help them unpack from their trip"
"ill see you tomorrow"
"okay bye babe I love you"
he hangs up the phone and I am not going to lie im hurt. why do I keep doing this to myself
"go.be with her. im just going to sleep anyways theres no need to be here" I say hurt in my voice. I hope he doesnt notice
"im not leaving"
"ugh why am I doing this" I say to myself
"doing what"
"letting you control my feelings. I shouldn't be hurt because she's your girlfriend but hearing you say you love her hurts me so much. I cant help but be jealous of her. she has the perfect life with the perfect boyfriend and I have none of it. the worst part is I want you but I know I cant have you because you want her"
"im sorry I dont know what to say"
"just dont say anything just go home and live your perfect life with your perfect girlfriend"
"I-im sorry" he says standing up
"dont be. its not the first time this is happening"
he leaves my room and once I hear the front door close I start crying. I quickly wipe my tears and go on my phone
I see I am added into a group chat
I open it up and its from my neighbors
?- hey its Brandon
?- Austin
?- nick
?- Edwin
?- Zion
m- oh hi
b- how are you
m- well im kind of an awful person
z- why
e- ?
m- I kissed my ex and I told him that I wanted him. and then I Made him leave to be with his girlfriend
a- oh
n- that doesnt make you an awful person you obviously still like and want him. you guys just broke up.
m- ik but I feel like an awful person because I still like him
b- you'll get over him eventually. you just have to find another boy
m- are there any boys at our school that I should like
b- yeah youre talking to all 5 of them. (I think 2 of them have gfs not sure but if they do oh well just pretend they dont)
m- oh
z- so im guessing you dont like that
m- oh no thats not what im saying. I wouldnt admit it but there is one of you guys that I wouldnt mind dating
a- oo I wonder who
m- idk well goodnight im tired ill see you Guys in 2 days
a- night
b- goodnight :)
e- gooooodniiiiight
z- nighttttttt
n- good night
I put my phone down and go to sleep