Maureen Suarez. Why are you so damn beautiful?
It was a rhetorical question by the way and I got my answer when I saw her walking down the aisle.
Pinagtatawanan namin ng barkada ang umiiyak pag ikakasal. Baduy 'yun, hindi ko gagawin 'yun sabi ko pero kinain ko lahat ng sinabi ko nung bumakas ang pinto at nakita ko siya.
Tears started forming my eyes and she haven't even started walking yet!
Fuck ang baduy ko. No wait, in love ang gago.
Azriel was eyeing me and slightly while clearing his throat. He is my best man, he is literally the best man out of them. He's the best choice for this. Besides he's help me several times before too. Siya lang ang nakakausap ko ng matino.
If I can put up my middle finger up ginawa ko na sa nagtatawanan na mga kaibigan ko. But for now my eyes are only for Mor.
Tama pala talagang may baon akong panyo because from the moment she took her step forward, tears started falling.
I have to wipe it repeatedly para makita ko siya. She smiled and when she is near me that I realized that she's crying too. We both laughed when we reach each other.
Pareho kami ng iniisip. Today is a great day but both of us are crying.
"Ang pangit ko na sa picture niyan. Ikaw kasi!" Pinagalitan pa niya ako bago kami humarap sa pari.
Now I understand why guys cry. When you see your beautiful bride walking down the aisle and you just know that this beautiful girl walking towards you is yours. That out of million guys out there she chose to be with me for the rest of her life.
And this is what matters. That we are choosing each other.
When it is my turn to say my vow, I smiled and gave all my attention to Mor.
"I have no script written. I didn't prepare one actually because all I can say is I love you and I'm choosing us. I will love you everyday and I promise to hold your hand. Whatever happens, I will hold your hand for as long as I can. I love you."
She is wiping her tears and smiling at the same time. She mouthed, I love you to me.
To others what I said is just normal and plain but we both know the real meaning behind it. I intend to keep my promise to her for so long as I live. I will never let go of her hand and stay by her side through everything.
I noticed that she has the whole script written but she disregard it. She shake her head and look right straight into my eyes.
"I remember when I said that I will never sleep at you house again. Do you remember what you told me? You said that soon it's going to be our house. This is what I'm promising you, I promise to stay by your side and that I will also hold your hand and never let go. We even found a way back to each other, paano ba 'yan? Even if you want to get rid of me, you can't." She laughed a little. "From now on, you are my life. I love you."
This time no judgement from my friends anymore. They are smiling and I thought I saw Dro crying.
The rest of the day passes like a blur. So many things need to be done and so many guest to entertain but I will always remember when the priest announced us as husband and wife and kissing Mor as officially my wife. And the first dance as husband and wife and the feeling of knowing she'll always be there from this day on.
The assurance and the thought that neither of us will let go makes me smile. Ito ang panghahawakan ko. I know this is only the beginning at marami pang pwedeng mangyari.
We just sat at the bed after what went through this day. Both tired but happy. Honestly we're both so tired that we rather sit and talk and have wine than do anything else. Some things can always be done tomorrow anyway. Time is what we have right now and we intend to take things slowly.
I filled her glass with wine and she smiled knowingly at me. "Nilalasing mo ba ako?"
"Seriously? Kung gusto kitang lasingin kanina ka pa lasing."
She elbowed me playfully, "Hey, I'm getting better at this."
"Really huh? We will see."
"Akalain mo tayo pala magkakatuluyan? At one point of my life, naisip ko na wala na, magaalaga nalang ako ng aso. I sort of gave up finding the right guy after you kasi ang tanga ko. Pinakawalan ko 'yung taong mahal ko para sa ex ko."
"It was a wrong move on your part by the way." I chimed. She shot me a glare so I quickly added, "But may mali rin ako doon. Iba pa ang thinking natin noon and we were sort of immature and happy go lucky lang sa relationship natin."
"Right." She grinned at me. "Pero hindi porket asawa na kita papayag na akong agawin mo 'yung moment ko."
I grinned back and let her continue.
She took a sip on her wine. "So ayun nga. As you said immature pa tayo. And I don't really plan on getting married kasi ayaw kong matali sa taong hindi ko naman mahal. It's unfair for the guy too. I have my life set as it is. Until you came along. Sinisira mo talaga mga plano ko sa buhay."
I just nodded. Sa tagal tagal namin I'm only hearing this for the first time so I don't interrupt.
"Eris, you are the guy who ruins my plans. But little did I know na ikaw rin pala bubuo sa akin. I became what I am right now partly because of you. Nung college pa tayo number 1 supporter kita. I pursued my dreams because I always go back to the days we were together. How you asked me to go for it. Kasi kung ako lang 'yun at hindi kita nakilala, malamang office work ang meron ako ngayon. I might be photocopying papers for someone else who knows!" Mor laughed.
"Okay. And then?"
"What I'm saying, Eris, is you are my inspiration. Without you I'm nothing." She drank from her wine again.
I take the glass from her and put it on the side table. I scoot closer to her until a little distance is left. "You're not nothing. You would still be the badass, feisty, strong and independent woman who cursed me on the first day we met. Imagine, ako na ang hinalikan mo ng walang paalam, ako pa 'yung minura mo? Wala kang katulad. And from that attitude? Alam ko na mararating mo lahat ng pangarap mo without anyone's help."
"I just pushed you a little, maybe, but the rest is on you. Give some credits to yourself, Mor." I lift her chin up and made eye contact with her. "Look at me, I won't choose some pushover girl. Unless you do think that of me then okay."
She shake her head and smiled more to herself. "This is why I love you. Alam mo ba 'yun?"
I put up an innocent look. "Really? I thought it's all because gwapo ako?"
"No. Sino ba may sabing gwapo ka? Buti na nga lang at mabait ka kung hindi... naku!"
"Ah ganon? Ganun pala ah." Then without any warning I tackled her.
She screamed and laughed and kicked. I didn't let go.
Like I said in my vow, I will never let go.