"Why are you here Harry?" I ask following him up to my bedroom. I hold the door shut before he can enter my room.
"Well I'm bored and you're quite.. fun." He says, his eyes widening when he says fun.
"If you came over here to re-enact last night, I suggest you get going." I say lowly and he grins back.
"Lucky for you, I'm not going any time soon." He announces, smiling.
I groan loudly and open my door. Harry barges his way into my bedroom and almost trips on a sneaker. I laugh under my breath but stop when he gives me a stare. I hold back a smile and jump onto my bed.
"I brought a gift." Harry speaks after he gives himself a small tour of my room.
"What is it?" I ask curiously.
Harry digs into his pocket and pulls out a small plastic pocket of bud and I grin and stick my hand out. He goes to put it in my hands but then takes it back.
"Harry do you understand how giving a gift works?" I look at him like he's an idiot.
"Yeah I get something back." He says proudly.
"You're actually stupid no wonder why you have no friends." I say and Harry raises his brows at me "Says miss loner stoner right here." He comments back. I smile at his cute attempt to offend me.
"What do you want back?" I ask.
"Blowjob would cut the price," He teases and I pretend to gag. I'm only joking Care."
"Yeah yeah." I nod, rolling my eyes.
"Well if you're up for it.." He begins, a playful smirk plastered on his lips.
I laugh and shake my head. I rub my tired eyes and Harry takes a seat on my bed.
"Well in return I'd need to use your stuff because I forgot papers and a lighter, or if you have a bong." Harry says and I reach underneath my bed pulling out a glass bong.
"Trust you have one."
"Well I am a loner stoner right?" I repeat his previous words and he gives a small laugh as a response. I lazily get out of my bed and grab a lighter. Harry follows me outside and we sit on the comfortable couch.
I don't remember the story of how this couch ended up in our backyard. To be honest, I didn't remember much of the school holidays. Nessa, Zayn and I would get wasted together almost every single day. I'm surprised none of us ended up dead by the time school started.
Harry takes a hit from the bong before passing it to me. We share it back and forth until we are both sitting like vegetables, staring into the night sky.
"How did you end up in Alverton?" I blurt out randomly.
Harry sucks in a sharp breath "Erm, I got expelled from my old school and then mum and I decided to leave our old town."
"Oh no shit." I say "I got expelled from my old school as well." I relate and Harry turns to face me.
"Not surprised." He says "What for?"
"A mix. But mainly just not rocking up, and when I did I was always getting into fights." I say and Harry smiles.
"Nothings changed." He comments and I nod. I realise that I'm slipping back into my old habits, and it's all because of my mum.
"What about you?" I ask him.
He shifts a little "Basically same as you. I wouldn't show up and if I did I was not sober and I'd be fighting people." He says slowly. His eyes are hazy and his mouth is open slightly.
Harry's face was so perfectly structured, like a Greek God.
"If you don't mind me asking, why wouldn't you go to school?" He asks and I don't know if I make up a lie or tell him the truth.
My mind feels too heavy to make up a lie right now, so I tell him.
"It just all goes back to my dysfunctional mother and deadbeat dad. I don't even remember what my dad looks like or what his name is." I tell him, feeling tight in my chest. I don't know how he'll react to it.
"Sorry, that got a little deep." I say when he doesn't respond.
"No not at all." Harry says and reaches out to touch my arm in a way to say that he's listening.
"What about your mum?" Harry asks and I feel another tightening in my chest. I don't even want to call her that title. She doesn't deserve it.
"She's really fucked up and brings it out on me. There has never been one stage in my life where she has not abused me mentally or physically. She reckons all of her problems are all because of me and that the reason dad left was because of me. I used to take all my anger out on anyone, I didn't care who they were. Then I fell into alcohol and drugs and I'd use them to try and escape. And now, because of her, I feel incapable about caring for anyone, including myself. I guess it's cause I've never been cared for." I admit and Harry holds my wrist, in a comforting way.
His hand then cups my small one in his large one. He slowly rubs his thumb gently over and I feel like a weight had been lifted off my chest. A comfortable silence lays between us. The trees whistle softly in the wind. I feel relaxed. I've managed to hold myself together.
"Are you okay?" He asks after a moment of silence, his voice was calm.
"Honestly, no. I'm screwed up." I answer him and his grip tightens on my hand before our fingers elope.
"Well if it makes you feel any better, my head is probably just as screwed up as yours." Harry says and I'm glad he's taking the attention off of me. I'm intrigued. I have all of my attention on him, not missing a word he says.
"My parents would abuse the shit out of me when I was young, mentally and physically. It was mostly just my dad, my mum would just let everything happen and I still hold it against her. I used to take the abuse and then cry about it. But one day I snapped and almost killed my father. Then, you know the story, alcohol, drugs, fights." He says and I give a small smile.
"And finally, the most happiest time of my life, I get expelled and my mum leaves my dad during that same week. Then we moved over here and I'm trying to keep myself together before I graduate." He finishes.
He releases his grip from my hand and I frown. But then I feel him shuffle closer to me and extend his arm around my body pulling me in. I rest my head on his chest and place my arm over his stomach. I can hear his heart beating and it's relaxing.
It feels comforting, having someone hold me this way. I almost feel like crying, but I refuse to admit it's because of my mum. I convince myself that it's probably just cause of my period that's due soon.
"Are you okay?" I whisper.
"Fine, just traumatised, but I've never known anything else." Harry replies and I tighten my grip around his stomach, holding myself against him.
"You're way less of a dickhead than I thought you were." I admit and Harry laughs, a sound that makes me feel butterflies inside of my stomach.
"Don't get me wrong, I still think you're an asshole."
"Well Carey, I still think you're a fucking bitch." Harry announces and I giggle "Just now, I understand why." He adds.
His free hand rubs my thighs in a non-sexual way. I push my body closer to his before I feel his arms grab my waist and sits me on his lap. My knees are bent beside his legs. He sits up and I feel his arms elope around my torso. I don't even realise that my arms were wrapped around him.
We stay like this for a while, neither of us saying anything. I almost feel like I could fall asleep on him. Harry was so comforting, I had never experienced anything like this at all. Aside from Nessa. But this felt different.
I feel his warm body move away and I whisper a no trying to hold him back. He smiles and gives a light chuckle. I move my face from his shoulder and come face to face with Harry.
Our eyes meet and the contact doesn't break. My hair falls in front of my face and Harry's hands quickly move, tucking the loose strands behind my ears. Our foreheads butt and our noses touch.
I think for a second that he'll kiss me, or that I'll kiss him. He moves his head and plants a kiss on my forehead. Then moves his head back to it's previous position. His eyes close and I feel his lips centimetres from mine.
I lick my lips and shut my eyes.
But before our lips even brush against each other, I hear a car pull up in the driveway and both of our heads snap up.
Ethan was home.