I called in sick the next day, since I didn't have the energy to drag myself even to bed after what had happened last night.
Why was my life such a tragic comedy? Why did everything always go wrong? Most of all, why was I so freaking dumb? Maybe the answer was in the question, everything always went wrong because I was so freaking dumb.
Somehow, I pulled myself up and crawled onto my bed. I stayed there all day, trying to figure out how to deal with the mess I had gotten myself into. A smart human would resign at this point and start their life from a scratch, no matter how difficult. But wasn't a smart human, I was still hoping to find a way. I didn't want to run away this time, I wanted to face it. As long as I was in Seoul, there was going to be a way to make things work out. There had to be. I just had to find it.
***
In the evening, when I was sipping my coffee and trying to look up "ways to get back your ex" on the internet, Daniel called me again.
"You didn't answer my call yesterday?" He asked.
"I am sorry, I was... kind of... busy..."
"What's wrong with your voice?"
"Huh? Oh that... I am kind of sick..."
"Of what? Me?"
"Nooo! It's... just that... I don't feel all that great right now.I would never get sick of you, you're an amazing person. I mean, you're the only person who actually gives a fuc... who actually cares about me, in this city"
"April.."
"Yeah?"
"I think your job is stressing you out"
"So what if it is, it's not like I have a choice." I sighed
"Why not, you can always resign"
"I can't..."
I told him how we were struggling to pay off our debts.
"April. I just want you to know that... I'll always be there for you, whenever you need me. If you think this job is too much for you, you should resign right away. I'll get you a new job, a better one"
How was I supposed to tell him that it wasn't the job that I cared about, it was Jungkook. The guy who was always going to assume things without ever bothering to listen to me. It probably wasn't even his fault, it was just me, always screwing things up.
"Can i ask you something?" I asked him.
"Go on"
"Why are you so... nice to me?"
"Can't you tell?"
"Uh...no?"
"Then I'll give you time to figure it out."
I got up and went towards the door, where that paper was still pinned.
"Daniel, thank you for all that you've done for me, but I think I would still stick to this job, as long as I can manage"
After I ended the call, I removed the paper from the door and tore it into as many freaking pieces as I could manage.
I won't give up on you, Jungkook, just the way you didn't give up on me. I've taken so much hurt already. I can take a bit more. A lot more too. I'll wait for the day you'll finally forgive me, no matter how much i suffer.
A/N:
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