Author's Note: Hey guys! I hope you're enjoying the story, it gets much more entertaining soon! This chapter is pretty chill however, and I was actually thinking about uploading two chapters a day so you can read at whatever pace you'd like. Please let me know it you'd like that either through a comment or personal message!
"I don't know, I feel like as I'm here I've kinda adopted a bit of an accent but I don't know- I don't know if it's really apparent and I don't know if you can hear it" I hear my good friend and fellow comedian Maya Rudolph say in her best impression of an English accent. It's insanely good which is no surprise since she practically specializes in impersonations.
I'm spending the day with her just out and about as we go into different shops here in London. Harry is spending the day with some friends and I think it's good we're spending some time apart. Maya has been in England for a couple of months now with her family since her husband's here for work. They practically live here at the moment which is perfect since I've known her for so long and we're genuinely friends. It's nice to know someone here that isn't in some way connected to Harry. I also kinda see her as a mother figure in my life, while no one can replace my mom I'm glad I still have someone like that in my life. She's much older than I am and gives great advice, she also makes me laugh so much. I'm glad I get to spend time with her because we often don't get the chance to.
"Oh yea no that's an English accent!" I play along. I've missed joking around with her, we have such similar senses of humour.
"Really? I don't know" she continues as she begins to make her impression much heavier, it's almost like she's impersonating a completely different type of English accent.
"It's getting more aggressive by the second" I admit and I can't help but laugh, my cheeks have been hurting so much today due to all my smiling.
"Really? But I can't hear it" she says as she continues to make her accent more intense and specific.
"What's weird is that it cuts through all the different sectors of England" I tease as she and I burst into laughter since Maya isn't just sticking to one type of English accent.
"Momma! Momma! I know what I want now!" I hear one of her daughters, Lucille, shout as she runs over to us. We were currently in a small little Gelato store and Maya's children were all standing by the counter trying to decide what to get.
"I do too! She stole my idea" says her oldest child Pearl. And soon the two of them begin to bicker back and forth.
"Alright, alright! It's fine you both can get the same thing" Maya says as she tries to calm her kids down. Maya has four kids and we're spending the day with all of them. I think they're all so cute and I've met them on several occasions before so I'm really happy they're here.
After we've all ordered our gelato we sit at one of the tables in the shop, there's no one else here which is nice. Although the shopkeeper did recognize us and asked for a photo so I know we're not completely invisible right now. I watch as Maya shares her gelato with her youngest child Minnie since she's too young to have her own. They look so cute, all of Maya's kids are so cute and nice. I love spending time with them, it kinda makes me excited about the idea of having my own one day, which is something I've never told anyone.
"Alright should we go? Yea? Okay say thank you to the nice man for our food" I hear Maya tell her children as we begin to exit from the store.
"Thank you!" I hear her kids sing in unison as the man says goodbye and we begin to walk down the streets of London, peaking at the storefront window decorations and judging whether we want to go in them. I carry her youngest daughter in my arms as we walk, since I'm sure Maya's feeling a bit tired and she is the cutest kid ever.
"How does it feel? Living here, and raising a family?" I ask Maya since I'm genuinely curious. As much as I would never admit it to anyone, including myself, that's a pretty likely scenario in my own future. Although I don't have to say that out loud for Maya to know that I'm asking for personal reasons.
"It's nice, I really like it. As soon as I decided to really immerse myself in the culture. Even little things like calling 'fries' 'chips' and 'cookies' 'biscuits' there's something about it that's so peaceful and enjoyable" she says and I nod my head. I'm enjoying myself here too, I'm just not sure if I could handle it long term. "Plus, this American accent gives me a lot of attention, which you know has also been something I've been searching for" she jokes which makes me laugh. "No but seriously though, I love it here, it's so nice and quaint" she adds.
"Well maybe for you" I groan. No one even really knows that Maya has been living here for the past couple months. You can't find articles or photos on the internet, I don't think I've been outside once here and there hasn't been multiple articles and photographs posted online to document it.
"This is the first time I've seen them in months" Maya says, clearly referring to the paparazzi across the street. "It's like there's a witchhunt for you two. Like they really need to know you two are alive and will search all day for evidence" she jokes.
"We had a little road trip recently. We didn't stop in any big, crowded areas. Even if we wanted to. And no one saw us. People thought we broke up. It was really fun, but also kinda disappointing. I remember as a kid all I wanted was to make a lot of money when I grew up so I could see different landmarks and could pay for different attractions. Now I finally have money and don't think it's possible. But I'm not telling Harry that, there's nothing he can do, I don't want him to think it bothers me" I admit. I know I can tell Maya anything, she's not only trustworthy and caring but she's someone who has actual wisdom and advice.
"You two are definitely at a level that's hard to come down from. Especially not any time soon, I'm talking years- decades actually. It's not gonna go away, with or without Harry. But it also shouldn't define who you are. Keep who you are rooted in your relationships with family, friends, and your faith. It's fun to go to different places but we get to see things no one ever gets to see. No amount of money can show you the inside of one of the SNL pitch meetings, no amount of money can show you what it looks like standing right beside the stage at Wembley Arena while your boyfriend is performing" she admits.
"But what if I don't care what it looks like. I'd rather stay in some cheap hotel at Niagara Falls and ask strangers to take pictures of me in front of the waterfalls than watch The Oscars unfold in person"I sigh, but not over what I just said, I'm sighing over what I'm about to admit. "I was actually thinking about quitting. If that's even possible. I wanted to just go home, live with my dad, never do anything in the 'spotlight' again. I have enough money to sustain me living at my old house, and if I got bored and wanted a job I'd just wait a couple months so things about me died down and then just do it. No one would care about me anymore" I admit.
"You're unforgettable Ari. You leaving is like Dave Chappelle leaving, no one's gonna forget, you can't be replaced, people will look for any glimpse or sighting of you. And I hate to play this card but, what about Harry? I don't think you can leave and take him and his career with you. It's one or the other. I'm only bringing him up because you two are quite serious, you're living together, you've been dating for so long, and I know you wouldn't be with him if you didn't think this would work long term" she says and she's right. When I think about it my mom would be against the idea too, she would be so disappointed to see me throw all my hard work, talent and dreams out the window and she would be disappointed that I let someone like Harry slip away.
"You're right, there's no way I can stop people from staring at me, even if I didn't do all of this" I admit. "I just feel like I have a responsibility to stop the photographers, like they're following me because I asked them too" I add, I know it's not true but I just feel like I'm suppose to do something about it. It's one of the biggest problems I face and I've grown up believing if you have a problem you should try and fix it rather than live with it but, I also know running away isn't a good solution.
"Don't let the people who genuinely care for you get away. I think that's the most important advice I've ever gotten and can give" she says as she wraps her arm around my shoulder and gives it a squeeze. "I'm talking specifically about me" she adds which makes me burst out laughing.
"We wanna go here mom please!" I hear Pearl whine as she stops by an ice cream shop and I try my best not to laugh since Maya seems a bit frustrated. We just stopped for gelato, there's no way these kids should be given any more sugar.
"Ariana" I hear Minnie say as I carry her in my arms. I look at her to see her giggle and wrap her arms around me, she is so cute.
"Let's go in here first, c'mon! Maybe you'll find something nice. There are photographers around, show them you're good kids, and Ari's here, you don't want your behaviour to embarrass her do you?" Maya explains to her kids as they comply and we all head towards the cute baby/children shop Maya was referring to. I know going in there will ignite rumors that I'm pregnant but I don't care, like Maya said it shouldn't dictate my life and besides, the rumors will go away eventually.
"Sorry Ari!" I hear Pearl say as we walk in.
"It's fine, I know you're a good kid. Your mom is tired let's try and not give her any hard time" I smile as I squeeze her cheek and she gives me a quick hug.
"I love you Ari" she admits and my heart absolutely melts. I've always been afraid of kids, I think I'm awkward around them since I never really spent time around them as I grew up. I think I'd be a terrible mother for that reason and have kinda blocked out the idea of having kids as something I want. But, I see how Harry is with kids, he loves them, when there is a kid around he treats them like they're the whole world. I can tell he wants them in the future, he tells me if I don't want them he's fine without them but don't know if it's true. I've been putting a lot of energy into any interactions I've had with kids lately and I definitely see improvement in my behaviour around them. I genuinely enjoy it.
"Do you like this? No? What about this? Yea? Do you wanna hold it? Here you go!" I giggle as I hand a little stuffed elephant to Minnie and watch her eyes light up as she plays with it. I really want kids in the future, and not just because Maya's are so cute. I've been reflecting on it a lot, I think I could raise them to be strong and caring, I think I'd be able to handle all the responsibilities that come with it. People who shouldn't be parents are parents, I have the money and tools needed to raise a child right, why not do it? I was afraid of kids for so long but they're truly beautiful and I think I can do it.
We continue to walk through the store and Maya and I joke about some of the ridiculous things parents will put their kids through and I try to think of how I would behave in those situations.
"Hey, I think that's kinda cute" I joke sarcastically. "I would totally do that if I had kids" I add. "But seriously..." I say before looking around to make sure no one, including the shop keeper was in earshot of us. "I think I want kids, in the future, in the very far away future" I admit. I'm trying to be secretive because Maya's the first person I've told, I haven't told Harry and I don't want to in case I ever change my mind. Or worse, I find out I'm infertile or something and have gotten his hopes up.
"Really? Ari that's fantastic! It is honestly so rewarding and fun, I also think you'd be a great mom and I'm not just saying that" she says which makes me smile, that's exactly what I needed to hear.
"Thanks, I'm still kinda unsure and scared. But I mean I'm more for it than against it. I haven't even told Harry. He acts like he doesn't care if we have kids but it's so obvious he wants them, even if he doesn't admit it. It's sweet but I feel kinda guilty. That's not why I want kids, but the fact that he does want it and is so great with kids is definitely a pro" I admit.
"When do you think you'll tell him?" she asks and I shrug my shoulders, I don't know.
"I don't know, could be in a week, could be in a couple of years" I admit, although I'm almost certain it won't be next week. I don't know when, how, or even if I should tell him.
"I don't think you should wait too long. But I do think that you should wait until you're completely certain. Like you said he wants this even if he doesn't want to admit it. Don't make him wait, it can't be fun for him" she adds and I nod my head, she's completely right. "So, have you come up with any baby names?" she teases since it's way too early for that, I'm not even pregnant and I don't want to be any time soon.
"Oh of course, that's the only thing I've thought of, the names I've come up with are the only reason I want kids" I joke.
"Ari is having kids? Yay!" I hear Lucille exclaim as Maya tries to shush her daughter since someone might overhear her and believe us. "Can we be sisters?" she asks which makes me laugh.
"Sure! They won't be here for a couple of years though, you can be they're older sibling, like Pearl is yours. Is that fun?" I joke and Lucille jumps with joy.
"Alright good! Now lets focus our attention on... This stuffed bear" Maya says to distract Lucille from saying anything else, especially since someone may overhear her. 'Sorry' she mouths which makes me laugh, I'm so happy to be hanging out with them today.