Here guyssss a brand new 4k+ for uuuuuu!
Ally woke up to darkness still. She blinked and let out a sigh turning to her side, ready to go back to sleep when she discovered the cause of her rousing. Lauren was mumbling around her paci in her sleep. She had a slight smile on her face, half hidden by the Simba paci, her hurt arm cuddling Nala close to her chest, the other loosely wrapped around her new stuffies, her little hand closed against the tail of the grey one. She watched as Lauren's hands moved slightly before she pulled all the stuffies closer to her resulting in the small ones rolling around her.
Ally chuckled under her breath and sat up, ready to put them back close to her when she noticed smile on the younger girl's face disappear, a frown on her delicate features and where before there were happy mumbles now there were whimpers.
"Oh Nena, why are nightmares plaguing you so much recently hum?"
She cupped the brunette face, and began rubbing her cheeks, while waiting for a little while to see if the nightmare would go away on its own. As soon as Ally decided to wake her up Lauren suddenly sat up on the bed, pressing both hands on the mattress and hissing in pain, pulling her arm back up.
"Lauren, hey"
Ally went to try and help her only to have Lauren back away.
"Lauren? Whats wrong?"
She tried to approach again but slower, she noticed cloudy green eyes, almost gray, fixed in a spot over her shoulder.
"Baby can you hear me? You are in the hotel room, with me, Ally remember? With Nala and you little new kitties."
Slowly but surely, green eyes turned to her.
"Everything is ok, you are in the bed in the hotel room, with me."
She got Nala from where she fell and painfully slow approached with the stuffed lion, extending it in Lauren direction.
"Here, can you hold onto Nala? She is scared too. Yes, that's it. See Nala is right with you. Can I touch you?"
She patiently waited till the girl in front of her nodded before she gently pushed her hair from her face, her hand lowering to her shoulder where she let it rest for a few long seconds before letting her other hand touch her, sliding until she was in a loose hug.
Once again the older woman just stood there until she felt the girl in her arms hug back, and only then she tightened the hug. Once she was sure it was ok she brought the girl fully into her, nuzzling the side of her head.
" 'm sorry"
"Its ok baby. Can I look at you wrist please?"
She took it in her hands, It didn't seem anymore swollen but she got up anyways, got the simba sport bottle with the pull up tip with water from the fridge in the kitchen area and the thermic gel bag. She made her way back to bed to a waiting Lauren. The gel bag was put on the hurt spot, and Lauren took the bottle in her good hand twisting her nose at it.
"Its water, you didn't have any before bed"
Lauren reluctantly pulled the tip with her teeth but it always ended up closing again. After the third time she felt like throwing it in the wall but instead just gave it to Ally with a huff.
"Take the lid off? Please?"
Once it was off she took a bit sip, a few drops escaping the edge of her mouth going down.
Once she was done she gave it back to Ally and laid back down. Ally closed the bottle and put it on the bedside table before turning back to Lauren.
"The last time I saw you like this was at the end of last tour. There was no horror movie today to blame. Do you want to tell me whats going on?"
She waited on an answer only to be met with silence, she sighed, she could not help but feel a bit disappointed but decided to shake it off and let the other girl approach her when she was ready.
"Ok come here, why don't we cuddle and get a few more hours of sleep?"
Lauren instantly moved and promptly let herself fall over her, her ear against her heart, listening to the rhythmic thump instantly made her all relaxed. It was a trick she used to calm herself as a kid, to listen to her mom's heartbeat... and it worked just fine with Ally too.
Ally brought one arm around her holding her in place and let her right go up to her face, her fingers tracing lines in her forehead and between her eyes as the girl sighed contently, and soon the girl drifted off, Ally following right behind.
____________________________
Ally was woken the second time by laughter. It woke her from her deep slumber and she blearily blinked her eyes noticing even with the light rain outside that she had slept in.
Eager to see what had the girls so happy (And to make sure they were not up to making trouble really) she got out of the bedroom to see Normani closing the door to the living room area(it also made her reflect how far they came in terms of hotels) all three girls a little damp but with takeaway bags and big smiles.
"Morning girls!"
They all chorused morning back to her.
"We got breakfast!"
"Yup Lauren chose wafflehouse for you!"
Lauren beamed at her and she chuckled before speaking again.
"Come on all of you shower before any of you get a cold! After that we can have breakfast, after I was thinking it's the perfect rainy morning to do some baking!"
She received animated responses as two girls left the hotel room and Lauren went straight to the bathroom. She got Lauren shorts and a sweatshirt, getting herself pajama pants and a tshirt. She got into the bathroom to see Lauren waiting for her in the bath, moving the washcloth back and forth in the water surface. She knelled beside the tub taking it from her and putting soap in before working in lathering the girl. Once she was all clean she moved to her hair, running her finger through it and enjoying the vanilla scent.
"Ally"
"hmm"
"I was thinking we could go window shopping in the afternoon? And then have dinner out?"
She sounded hopeful and Ally was so happy she seemed in such good mood even after the early morning hiccup that she agreed straight away.
"You are eating all of you dinner tho. And lunch! No skipping lunch today, deal?"
"Deal!"
She soon was finished and had all of her dried, including her hair. She hurriedly helped her dress before she got cold and went to shower herself.
Fifteen minutes later all of them were happily munching on breakfast, Ally cut Lauren waffles so she just had to stab them and bring to her mouth, with some syrup accident here and there. She affectionately cleaned her face making Lauren scrunch her nose up.
__________________
"Ok, who is ready to bake?"
"Meeee"
Ally smiled at Lauren enthusiasm. She distantly recalled from some talk or another that Lauren enjoyed baking with her mom and sibling on holidays and wished they had time to do that more often. It had been a long time before, but seeing the happiness in the girl's face as she got out all the ingredients she had called for earlier she felt the memory tug at her. Maybe she was too homesick. Maybe that was just it and ally had been overthinking it, but her gut told her a resounding NO so she decided to keep an eye open, just in case.
They worked together diligently; they made a vanilla and chocolate batch while Normani and Dinah made a double chocolate one. Once it was baking she turned to begin cleaning once to see Dinah pouring whipped cream straight into Laurens mouth and videoing it, not stopping at all once Laurens mouth was full.
Lauren took the leftover whipped cream that spread around her mouth and spread it in Dinah's face, Mani that was laughing beside them got her own share and retaliated getting flour and before Ally was able to say anything there were three floor covered girls, aiming eggs at each other.
"If I see one egg fly I swear to the Lord's name I will put each of you in a corner of the room."
They all stopped mid movement. It had happened exactly once before, and it involved a prank, Nala and an overreacting Lauren. No amount of pleas saved them from standing in that damn corner for as long as it took Ally to get things resolved. It was not fun at all.
Lauren looked at the egg in her hand. She was aiming at Dinah. She was so close to getting her. Would it be worth it?
"Lauren!" One voice groaned, one was indignant and one was pretty much mad.
Maybe Lauren miscalculated how mad Ally was.
"I want this room clean now. After that I better see your behinds in the corner, for half an hour, Lauren you are getting ten more minutes because you were the one who threw it, after I warned what would happen."
She heard groans but the girls got to work. Lauren looked pitiful dirty and cleaning with just one hand as well as she could, but ally stomped on the urge of stopping her and focused on making sure she didn't try to use her hurt arm.
Soon each girl was in a corner trying not to fidget. Once the half hour mark was up she sent the duo back to their room to get cleaned while Lauren had to wait for her ten extra minutes.
Soon that to passed, and Ally walked to the other girl, noticing her watering eyes and frowning.
"Hey it's all good ok? You are done"
"Im sorry for ruining the day for you guys"
Finally the tear fell, leaving a track on the flour on her face. Ally gave all the flour no thought and hugged the girl.
"You ruined nothing nena. Yes you should have stopped when I told you so, we are not at the LA house, it's a hotel and we shouldn't do certain stuff, but it's all cleaned up and yall paid in corner time. It's all good now."
She felt Lauren nod against her and sneeze.
"Bless you. Now lets get into a shower."
Lauren just buried herself in her more.
"I had a bath like 3 hours ago!"
"Yeah and it does not make you any less dirty right now come on."
Once she saw the girl was not willing to let her go she picked her up letting her koala hug her, soon feeling the familiar sensation of suckling against her skin. She decided to let her be as they were almost in the bathroom.
She helped her shower and let her dress herself with easy clothes while she asked for lunch, calling the girls to meet right after it so they could have a shopping day, then talking to her mom for a bit.
She went to the table getting her own plate and noticed Lauren struggling with eating with her left hand.
"Hey"
"Hi. The rice is not behaving"
"I see. Maybe I can help make it behave?"
Lauren blushed slight remembering her time out but decided to just let Ally helped her before she ended having to shower for the third time that day.
Ally smiled brightly once the fork was given to her and proceed to both eat and feed the girls. She filled the in between bites with some small talk about their music and soon she looked proudly at Lauren cleaned plate.
They all enjoyed the rest of the day with some light shopping and silly selfies, before moving their things back to the bus. They had 3 back to back shows before their break.
Once everything was settled in they all cuddled up on the back to watch a movie. Lauren had her sport bottle open lid off and kept sipping with enough frequency to make Ally frown and get water on poor Normani that had her head on her lap.
"Are you ok?
"Yeah, my throat is just bothering me a bit"
She went to take another sip and Ally put her hand under her chin just in time to save Normani from yet more water.
"Sorry Mani! Im still not used to using my left hand!"
"All good."
Soon they all headed to their bunks, Ally made sure Lauren was all tucked in her bottom bunk, all her stuffies in place, the sport bottle with cold water in case her throat hurt or she woke up from her now daily nightmare feeling thirst. She then got the paci and approached her mouth teasingly pulling back before she could latch making the girl pout and glare when she did it a second time and she chuckled before finally slipping it between her lips. She caressed her hair for a couple of minutes, observing her green eyes slowly close before kissing her forehead and going to her own bunk to sleep.
____________________
Only a couple hours later Ally woke up suddenly, immediately noticing a whimpering Lauren and getting down to open the curtain under hers, just in time to see a crying face and the sport bottle fall from her hands pouring water all over the bed as she was trying to take the lid off. She just seemed bothered by the pull up lid those days, always going down in the middle of her drinking.
Ally finally made her presence known and helped her from the bunk, by now the other girls had woken up too but just let ally handle it and closed back their curtains once she got there. She got the sport bottle out, then the stuffies and then the sheets, frowning when she noticed another wet spot. She discretely looked at the girl beside her and sure enough there was a spot in her pj pant. She decided not to say anything yet and just get the sheets inside a laundry bag. She decided she could get new ones in the morning and took Lauren hand. The girl was still crying hard so she took her to the bathroom and stripped her of her wet clothes and cleaned her up, before sitting in the toilet lid and pulling her into her lap.
"Were you alone again?"
Lauren hesitated before nodding.
"Im sorry"
"What for nena?"
"For dropping the bottle. And for having an accident"
"No need to be sorry baby both of them were just that, accidents."
Once she saw the girl was still crying she smiled mischievously and began humming.
Just as she suspected the crying stopped and Lauren looked at her in disbelief.
"Is that Hakuna Matata?"
"Yup. No singing tho, the girls are sleeping."
Lauren suddenly looked at herself and giggled.
"Seriously we are in a tour bus tiny bathroom, im naked crying on your lap while you hum hakuna matata. How crazy is it."
Ally lightly tickled her side earning a squeal.
"The only crazy thing is that we are not on the bunk yet. Come on"
She covered Lauren with a towel and carried her into her own bunk and hesitated for a second
"Nena do you think I could put a pull up in you? Just in case?
Lauren bit her lip nervous. If she was back in her bunk she would say no, but the possibility of having an accident on the bunk with Ally was more mortifying than her embarrassment at wearing a pull up so she nodded and let Ally powder her up and help slip it up her legs. Her cheeks were bright red by the time they were both in the bunk but she was soon soothed as she suckled on her Paci and listened to Ally heartbeat, letting it and the soft patting on her bottom lull her to a few more good hours of sleep, she stirred once crying and touching her throat but she felt someone take her paci and put it back and suddenly she was suckling on cold water and slipping back in deep sleep.
______________________--
The last few nights were basically the same and soon they finished their show in LA and were back at their shared apartment, even though it was mostly using during the time they were recording it still looked pretty lived in and they felt really good to be inside it again, even if for a few hours before flying to their family.
Ally was sitting in the counter when Dinah sat next to her, looking like she wanted to say something.
"Come on spit it out I don't bite."
"Yeah Lo is the one that like to chew stuff- ouch ally ok ok"
She rubbed the sore spot on her arm she was just slapped.
"Did you talk to Lo about the stuff we showed you"
"..."
"You didn't, did you? Dammit Ally! I know its scary but look, I think you are way too far In to be in denial right now! You got her pacifier, teething toys, stuffies, blankets, and don't you think we don't know you like to be the one helping her into and out of her pull ups – the bunks are really small and did you think we would never notice?- Also, did you tell her you are soothing her with the hakuna matata bottle to help her throat and keep her from waking more than once? Or are you going to let find by herself and get even more confused? The clock is ticking Ally. We are leaving to the airport as soon as Mani is done, what then? Are you willing to let this precious bond you have with her slip through your fingers?"
Dinah just got up and left her there stunned in silence, with her chest tight.
-----------------------------------------------------
Soon they were in the living room saying goodbye to Lauren, Ally being last.
"Your flight is early morning isn't it Around 3AM? Don't forget your documents and make sure all your stuffies are in you backpack, only Nala out, the others are small and could get lost. Don't forget to take the anti-inflammatory ok? Don't forget a jacket!"
"Ok there mom" Lauren joked smiling but Ally still felt Dinah words fresh from before.
"Just be careful ok Nena? No drinking either, you are both underage and on meds. I love you"
"Love you too 'lly!"
Ally took her in her arms and the hug she received back almost left her overwhelmed. It had such desperation in it there. She backed a bit finally letting go looking worried into watering green eyes.
"Call if you need me"
She kissed her temple and left with the girls, heart heavy and ignoring Dinah and Normani's gaze.
________________________-
Lauren let the blinking lights and vodka shoots guide her. The girls probably thought she was on the plane to Miami right now. She would probably text them in a few hours to say she was all good and home. She snorted to herself. She took one more shoot and felt nauseous, making her way to the vip bathroom. Once inside she looked the door and collapsed beside the toilet before throwing up mostly liquid, as she had no dinner. When she was sure she was done she let herself slid to the floor sitting with her back to the wall, her arm throbbing without the brace or painkiller, just a bit dulled by the alcohol. She needed to pee badly but everything was spinning so much and she had no strength to get up. The strong smell of puke made her lean over the toilet again grimacing as her stomach was empty and she just strongly dry heaved, and then felt warmth spread in her bottom and she cried. And she really hated public toilets.
Once her stomach finally stopped contract she looked down really grateful for her black leather pants. There was no visible evidence of her accident except for her wet feet which she dried. She shakily got up, knowing she was smelling like puke, and wondering if she should leave the nighthouse as she left the bathroom but again she saw a new bottle of alcohol and decided to stay a bit and took long sips. Her empty stomach made the alcohol that much stronger and she was there leaning against the wall and thinking and thinking and thinking.
Ally would be disappointed.
But Ally was not there she was alone.
But she loves Lauren.
But Clara did too.
But she worries about Lauren, she takes care of her.
But Clara did too.
And she had no claim on ally at all.
But then again even if Ally really was something like a mom, clara did too.
And it seems mommies always leave her anyways.
-------------------------------
Ally groaned in the airport. Her flight had be cancelled because of a problem. Damn if she could have gotten into the same plane as Mani she would have been in texas by now.
It was a mess and she just sent a message to her parents saying she would wait it out a day and buying a new ticket. She didn't let it bother her much as they had a lot going on with some crazy neighbors and a surprise visit from an aunty she particularly didn't like so she could guiltily think to herself she was relieved she got to avoid it one more day.
She sent a group text out to everyone explaining what happened before heading back to the apartment, it was almost 4 am and she was exhausted.
As soon as she got there she received a text from one of the band members in the group that made her tremble with anger and worry.
'Thank god you are in LA, we just found Lauren drunk out her mind and smelling of puke. We are taking her home'
Ally paced back and forth for the whole 15 minutes it took them to arrive.
She opened the door and Lauren stumbled in she gave a thankful nod to her band members that flinched at her thunderous expression and nodded back before leaving.
She closed the door and locked it before walking to the obviously drunk Lauren.
"WHAT WERE YOU THINKING! You can barely stand straight! You smell worse than a bar! You were supposed to be on a plane right now!"
Lauren cried and cringed with each yell, she was dizzy and everything was jumbled and she could not understand, she just knew there was someone mad. Was it ally? She thinks so.
She tried to take a step but went down.
As soon as she saw Lauren fall, her anger was overruled by worry and she hurried to her side. She picked her up and decided a cold shower was needed. She remained fuming in silence yes but she could yell when the girl was sober, she wouldn't even remember it now. She sat the girl on the counter, got her shirt off, it was stained with puke and would go to the trash. She began to get her pants off noticing the damp skin underneath and hurried to take it off, knowing that the leather rubbing against pee could give her a rash fast.
She turned to get a clean towel from the stack by the door, but as soon as she turned her back her body froze with the scream that came from the younger girl.
"NO NO DON'T LEAVE AGAIN PLEASE PLEASE"
Lauren vision was swimming, she could see Ally but then she could see dark hair and lighter skin and was it her mom? It was! Or was it ally? Or were they both? She could see her leaving and panicked.
She clumsy got down from the counter falling to her knees and using Ally bod to get up, her hands were trembling, her whole body was trembling.
Ally felt her heart skip a beat and held onto Lauren as she clung to her, on the verge of a panic attack.
"Don't leave me pleaseee. Please I will do better I promise"
Ally tried to do something, anything but could only hug the girl, in shook herself
Lauren was hysterical. She kept screaming 'please' between sobs and didn't seem to be slowing down.
Ally winced at the hands clawing at her back, and worried about her wrist, and worried about her state of mind.
Lauren felt like her hearth was both choking her in her throat and breaking in her chest. She could barely breathe.
"Don't send me away mommy, I will try to change I promise, I will never see her either please mommy please."
Her last words were barely there and she began to see spots in her vision.
She was so tired and she couldn't stop crying. She didn't want to be alone again.
Once Ally saw she was going to pass out she picked her up and rushed into the shower opening it full force, she need to sober her up as fast as she could.
Lauren startled in the cold water, burying herself on the warm body holding her against this freezing force.
Ally held her, her own body beginning to tremble at both the cold and the situation. Her eyes burned with tears.
She got them both out walking with Lauren till the clean towels, managing to put one arund both of them when she got rid of her wet clothes. She shakily walked into Lauren bedroom, the girl in her arms growing heavy and she carefully got her in the bed, hurrying she dressed herself in warm pjs and carefully dried Lauren, the alcohol and crying seemed to make her almost numb. She put a pull up on her, dressed her warmly and got her the kitty blanket and Nala, coaxing the paci in her mouth. She pulled her ear against her heart and felt her relax now in a more content way.
She looked at her sleeping for a bit before looking up at the ceiling, thinking of what she just learned, of how bad it gotten, of the hard talks they needed to have. Dinah was right. It was time to really talk to lauren, and it was also time to put all the puzzles together.
Her burning eyes finally let the tears out and she let them, nuzzling into her nena, inhaling her now clean smell and trying to rest for the next day.
----------------
Here you go! I hope yall liked it! so a little info:I have lauren biting habit lol, do u guys have any habit? nervous or just anything you find yourself doing?