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I don't know how the next minute after what i said, leaded to Ashton leaning in.
Or maybe... maybe i was the one that started to slowly eliminate the small gap between us. I'm not sure, but when our lips never claimed one another, any thought that wasn't about him disappeared inside my head.
It was only another painful, yet perfect confirmation of what i truly felt for him. I had it bad for him. Yes that's right, the one and only Katherin De'Lagun was actually weakened to the knees for somebody. And that somebody was pretty damn special to her, since it was only him that possessed the ability to make her feel sensations she'd never experienced before.
His hand soon held my face... and i swear everything in my body was begging me to take this further, to drag him upstairs to his bedroom, to do the most clichés with him...
And to make him officially mine.
I didn't have a problem when he placed his free hand into my hair... but then, then i did have a problem. Ashton decided to pull away.
I hated when he pulled away.
The sensation of his hands on me was still there, the places he touched were practically buzzing from the recent contact. I let the feeling linger a little longer by keeping my eyes shut tight, not wanting to go back to the cold, cold reality.
"Katherin... i-i shouldn't have done that," I hear Ashton say. "In fact, we shouldn't have kissed at your house on that countertop where it all began, we could've saved ourselves from whatever this craziness is."
He regretted it.
But i didn't. I would never regret discovering the sweetness that his lips held.
"No one was forcing you to crash your lips against mine on that morning," I finally open my eyes as i make my statement that was completely true. "No one was pointing a gun at you Ashton, you're the one that made the first move. You started it all with a kiss and now it's out of hand, whatever you call this, thanks to you." He furrowed his eyebrows and scoffed lightly. "Are you kidding me? You're the one that keeps tempting me with those beautiful starry eyes and the way that your lips move when-ever you pronounce anything, you're the one that makes me lose any type of control i have, you're the one that's now making me feel like if i am floating in space because that's how i feel when i am with you Katherin. I fucking hate the ability that you possess to make me entirely, and completely weak. I hate how there isn't a moment in any day where i don't think about you. And i hate that i know that... no one could ever compare to you Katherin." With each word that he let out i backed away as he moved foward slowly, our eyes never leaving each other's. I had trouble breathing the moment my back hit the cold wall. I was now trapped between the hard wall, and a strong chest that belonged to Ashton.
We've been in this position plenty of time's. I thought inside my foggy mind.
He had indeed gotten taller...
His thumb lightly brushed my lips and i felt little shocks of electricity at the sudden contact. "It's funny how we always end up like this." He says, in a very soft tone.
"But we never finish what we start." I let out, sighing. His eyes sparkle with clear amusement. "You have no clue how you affect me... it's not fair." He shakes his head, some small locks of his hair move. "Why's that?" I gather up the courage to ask him. He does not answer my question, but then he looks down at my lips and my heart does a somersault. He's right, it's not fair. "You probably don't experience all these little reactions my body does whenever you do anything, anything at all. I don't understand why i have to feel everything with such an intensity whenever you're around. I've never felt like this... ever." Ashton's voice was just a tiny bit above a whisper.
If he knew that i was going through the same exact thing he described. If he knew how much i truly wanted him all to myself. If he knew that i had never gone this long infatuated with somebody.
But maybe it wasn't infatuation. Maybe it was so much more.
But it couldn't be... i didn't even know much about him. And this thing has moved way too fast, well not fast enough for my liking. All i knew was that i felt a burning passion for him and him alone. He was the fiery pit in my stomach. He ignited me in flames whenever he gave me just the simplest of touches.
And i craved the harsh burn now more than i ever realized i did.
"Ashton i-"
He cut me off by placing his pointer finger onto my lips. "Shh."
"S-stop making me want you." I said, without thinking, the moment he traced tiny circles onto my thighs.
"You first." He stared down at me.
"I can't, i am very irresistible." I say, smirking out of the sudden, to try and cover up my nervousness.
"Then i guess you'll have to learn to deal with this." I swallowed hard when he pulled me much closer, holding my waist.
"And maybe you'll have to learn to deal with this." I stated, in one swift moveme-nt i got out of his hold, and i pushed him softly onto the wall. "And maybe we can manage just fine." He says, smilling as he pushes a strand of my hair to the back of my ear.
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You could say that Ashton and i were Netflix and chilling...
But we were not sucking each other's faces off. As a matter or fact, i had not given him the look that initiates the Netflix and chill. Neither had he, sadly. We were just sitting in a comfortable silence, watching... 50 shades of grey.
His mom had still not gotten home. She would not approve of Ashton watching this.
I knew what was coming when the elevator scene started.
Ashton just rested his cheek on the palm of his hand when Christian Grey and Anastasia Steele started kissing.
I wonder if he recalled how we had done the same thing in what was also an elevator, but our elevator light's went off and got replaced by red one's, and how just before that, he had done not so holy thing's to me with his mouth, in that vacant, dark hospital parking lot. Did he remember?
I know i do.
I always do.
I always will.
I flinched when i felt a familiar large hand rest on my small one. I turned to look at the person sitting next to me, to find out that he had scooted closer.
He was not facing me, his eyes were fixated on the screen. He intertwined our fingers, with a smile plastered on his face.
"Ashton?" I spoke to break the silence.
I wanted to tell him something, but i don't know what. So when he looked at me i said the first thing that came to my mind.
"Do you have a band-aid?" I mentally slapped myself.
I showed him my finger that was cut when he gave me a questioning look.
He paused the movie, standed up and pulled me with him. As we walked i saw alot of painings, some were a little too weird.
We finally reached the top of the stairs and he headed towards a dark hallway, i followed behind. His house was like a maze. We stood infront of a door and then we headed in, when he turned on the light's the walls were wine, and there was fluffy carpet on the floor. There was a huge bed with white covers and pillows. The night stands were a dark black. "This is my room." Ashton said. I widened my eyes because his word's from a long time ago came to my mind, he must've noticed my reaction because of his next statement. "I'm not going to do anything to you Katherin, don't worry." His long legs moved towards a white door, he opened it, and i waited standing in his bedroom.
He came back with a small box filled with what were band-aids. Ashton took my hand, and placed a band-aid on my finger. I furrowed my brows when he kissed my now covered finger. "Stop acting like you didn't avoid me for the past few month's Ashton." I say, rolling my eyes. He looks taken back by my word's. Yeah i know that i am bipolar as hell. "You don't know why i had to Katherin." He sighs.
"What is it then? Are you into someone else because if you are that's fine, i don't care. Why would i care? We're just friend's." I voice out all my thoughts, not being able to stop myself.
"No, Katherina there is not somebody else. As a matter or fact there will never be. You say you don't care? Yeah right. Stop lying to me and to yourself. Stop lying," He stepped closer, each word was a warning to me, with each word i stepped back. Our same famous old game. "No, I don't wanna be your friend, i wanna kiss your neck." I parted open my lips as his nose now touched mine. And then he lost it. He lost his control when i bit my lip. His lips moved down mine temptingly and landed on my neck. And i found that so hot.
To my dismay, the sound of key's moving ended our moment but Ashton did not stop, no, he was now sucking on my skin so hard that i wanted to moan. He covered my mouth with his hand to suppress the involuntary moans that escaped it.
It's yo boi dirty boi. JHAHAHA jk i amz so tired. And then satan decided to pay a visit, smh. So yesterday we had a party and dayum papi there was this boiiiii. Lmao idk.
Well fml tomorrow is the v day aka vagina day. Everyone hopefully get's it in, smashes, or taps it bahahah oml.
Well, ily! ♡
Xoxo
-C