Okay so....... My best friend's (practically sister) mother posted something on Facebook recently. It really got me thinking....
So..... Yeah.... She's right though. Mostly.
I don't know who exactly she was thinking about in this post or if she was just speaking in general but I feel like I should..... Defend myself.
If you have been reading this book then you know that my life is far from easy and carefree.
I wake up early in the morning, anywhere from 4:30-6:00 am. I wait until my uncle drops my 3 year old cousin off. My mom gets up for work at around 6:30 to get ready for work. My nephew sometimes gets up with me but other times with my mom. Depending on when he goes to sleep the night before. My mom gets in the bath. Sometimes my nephew gets in with her but most of the time he takes a shower with me. I rarely get to take a shower without him but that's okay because I love that little boy to death.
So, by the time our shower is over and we're dressed, it's around 7:30 am. When we're done I make my nephew and cousin breakfast. Anything from cereal to bacon and eggs and sometimes fried ham. They eat and I wipe them off. My mom leaves for work at around 8:30 am. She is a home health care aid for the elderly. Hoping to get her STNA license back. She had them but after my dad passed away she stopped working for awhile because we needed her with us and my grandma refused to watch us while my mom worked 3rd shift.
So anyway, after my mom leaves the boys and I play a little. We listen to music and dance. I feed the dogs. 6 dogs. I sweep and mop the mudroom (room between the kitchen and the back yard), kitchen and dining room. I do the dishes and wipe down all of the counters which are white and get very dirty. I do laundry all day as well. Including washing, drying, folding and putting it all away. I vacuum the rugs, 1 area rug in the living room and 2 kitchen rugs. My mom loves plants and has a green thumb so we have a lot of plants in our house. I water those when need be.
We also have pet covers on our couch and recliner and the boys mess those up so I have to make sure they stay covered. My nephew is still sick and has diarrhea, which he went to the doctor for and he has to have a camera shoved down his throat and up his butt. Not normal for a child his age. So anyway, my nephew is still in diapers and I have to change those through out the day. My cousin is potty trained but he will still sit and pee himself and when that happens I have to make sure he changes and I have to wash his clothes and wash whatever furniture he peed on. So when he pees on the recliner I have to spray and scrub it and make sure nobody sits there while it's drying.
The animal hair and dirt collects easily and very fast on our hardwood floors so I have to sweep the living room at least twice a day. Our air vents lift up and they are the big old school ones that are like 2.5 feet wide, so I have to keep the boys away from those. I also have to make sure the boys don't hurt each other, which tends to happen anyway because they do NOT get along! I also have a tough time making sure they don't break something and stay out of the kitchen. At around 11:30 I start making them lunch. Individual mac and cheese or grilled cheese and tomato soup or ravioli or left overs from dinner the night before. My mom gets home at around 2:30... Depending on which client she saw that day. When she gets home I lay a towel down on the couch or recliner for my cousin to lie down and take a nap then I take my nephew upstairs to my room to take a nap. It take about an hour and a half to an hour for him to fall asleep because he fights it so much. When he falls asleep I either get up and clean or fall asleep with him. Depends on how tired I am. I cannot do my school work while he's napping because my desktop computer is in my room and the screen is very bright and the typing noise wakes him up. My mom takes a nap at this time as well.
When everyone wakes up I clean some more while my mom yells at me for the house being a disaster. When my brother gets home from school he pisses her off and it's much worse. He leaves for school at around 7:30 am.
I help my brother with homework if he needs it.
Even though my mom is home she doesn't help watch the boys and I am still taking care of them so.... Yeah.
My uncle picks my cousin up anywhere from 5-6 pm. By that time we are making dinner or have already ate. When he leaves I clean up the kitchen from the dinner mess. I feed the dogs again.
My brother feeds the cats and cleans out the cat boxes. We have 2 cats.
At around 8:30 my nephew and I go upstairs to my room to watch a movie so he'll fall asleep. By this time my mom is on her 3rd or 4th beer. She doesn't get drunk until after about 6 beers. At around 9:30 my nephew is asleep and I either go to sleep or read for an hour or two. If I'm lucky I can log in and do some school work after my uncle picks my cousin up... Depending on my mom's mood. But if I was not able to do that then I log in on my phone just so I don't get withdrawn for not logging in.
This is my everyday schedule. In the last 2 months I have lost 19 pounds because I barely have time to eat. I eat a bagel with cream cheese at around 10 and then eat maybe a sandwhich at around 2:30. I stay full though because I drink at least 2 big cups of black tea (caffeinated) with about 4 teaspoons of sugar a day. I also take a 200 mg Excedrin tablet that has like 60 mg of caffeine in it, everyday. I do this so I have enough energy to keep cleaning and keep going. It also helps with the headaches that the children give me.
Big Chris, my step dad, thinks I need to talk to my uncle about finding a new babysitter because the 2 times that he has been here because work got cancelled, he has seen how much these children stress me out. They don't listen and all my cousin does is "Lexis, I'm hungry." "Lexis, I'm thirsty!" "Lexis, get me water!" "Lexis, put a movie in!" He thinks he can boss me around! He gets in trouble. I put him in the corner. The first time I did that he picked a whole football sized of paint off the wall! So now I make him stand against the wooden closet door with his hands behind his back.
I have responsibilities. I cook, clean and take care of 2 toddlers. I have been taking care of my cousin for about 3 months now and I have only gotten paid $90. He is very bad and a very bad influence on my nephew.
I have state testing coming up in March and my SAT in April. I don't know how this is going to work because I am my uncle's only babysitter. I am the only person who babysits my nephew as well. I am behind on my school work and I am depressed.
I call and make my family's doctor and vet appointments. I write grocery lists. I make sure the house is cleaned and we have clean clothes.
When I leave for the weekends I come home to a disastrous house because my whole family says "This house falls apart without you! Nobody cleans or cooks and Bralyn is so bad and doesn't listen to us and we can't handle him!" I come back home to all of the dishes dirty because nobody does shit.
Now, regarding the Facebook post... There are a lot of people who don't do shit and think they're entitled to everything.... *my sister* *my aunt* *my aunt*...... I understand this. But for those of us who try so hard to keep it together and work so hard, it hurts. Just because I'm a millennial doesn't mean I don't do anything or can't do anything. I can clean, cook, call and make appointments, sew, change a tire and much more. I have been taught this stuff. My mom might not be the best mom, but she isn't the worst. She has taught me all of this and much more. I know when I get older and have a life of my own, I will be okay and I won't need her help with cooking or cleaning or little things like that. I appreciate the things that she has done for me and taught me.
Another thing.... Everybody has dishwashers nowadays and complain about having to load and unload it. Boo Freaking Hoo. We have NEVER had a dishwasher. I wash all of the dishes by hand. Wash, dry and put away. Even after a ceramic bowl broke and split my hand open when I was 11 and I had to get 9 stitches. I still had to do the dishes. I just wore gloves and wrapped a rubber band around my wrist to keep water and shit out of them.
If my parents get in fights, I'm the one up the next morning cleaning up the glass.
If my parents have their friends over for a cookout and drinking, I'm the one up the next morning, outside cleaning up all of the trash, emptying out the beer bottles and cans and making sure everything is all cleaned up. If someone in the house spills something, I'm the one making mop water and cleaning it up so it doesn't stain out white tiles and make a sticky mess. If my nephew's bike chain falls off, I'm the one fixing it. If we catch a mouse with the mouse traps, I'm the one taking it out and throwing the mouse away, washing the trap and resetting it. If one of our animals die, which so many have in the passed for multiple reasons, I'm the one putting it in a box and burying it in the backyard.
Don't make generalisations based on a couple of people and say shit against a whole generation. Please. That insults those of us who work hard.
I may not have a real job at a store, getting a real paycheck but I take care of two toddlers, mostly for free. I take on a lot of responsibility for a 16 year old.
The quote posted is mine. Please do not steal it unless giving credit.
Thank you.