What is this place? I looked around. I tried to sit down but found I had no control of my body. Bloody hell! Another dream! I started to hate dreams after the terrible dream came true. Why? How? How is it possible that I can see the future? What is it this time? This time I am in some kind of bedroom. Completely black themed. No other color except black. No light coming from window or more like no source of light like windows. A completely closed room lit with artificial lightning. Why am I here? But a completely grand room, one fit for royalty, on par with rooms in Blake's castle except this one is dark. May be fit for someone like...................Demons??????
"So you are finally awake princess?" A door opened and my head turned.
I woke up panting once again. I didn't see the face but that voice I can recognize it anywhere. That is the voice of my evil demon torturer.Ugh! I rubbed my head. My head started to hurt and a tear rolled from my eyes, followed by another and another. All the images from the previous time appeared. I couldn't stop my tears. I can still feel the pain thinking about all the pain I had been through.
Last time I was kept in dungeons but this time I am in a bedroom. What does it mean? There was no one in then room except and no clues too. It was a completely closed room, so no way of escape too. Why am I in a bedroom in the first case. Unless he is planning to sexually abuse me. Did he decide to break me mentally too? I noticed a presence and jerked my head in fear. I looked up to make sure it is not the evil demon torturer.
It is Blake. What is he doing here? I never looked or refused to look at him after coming from the mall. He tried to move towards me but I gave him a look full of hatred and loath. Full of coldness. This is the first I showed some kind of emotion in this week and that was filled with hatred towards my so called mate who didn't want me. He flinched and I moved past him ignoring him. I don't care about him now. I don't want to be in the same room as him. Also I have to do something. I ran to the library and sat at a table.
That day, exactly one week before, when he said that those awful words to me. 'I wish you weren't my mate'. They were imprinted in my mind. I was in a daze after hearing that. I never knew how I got home, sorry Blake's castle. When I came to my senses, Blake was nowhere in sight, not that I wished to see him. I locked myself in some random room I found. The castle is so big with many unused bed rooms. I cried to my hearts content and slept crying. I woke to the sound of crash and looked up to see Blake who broke the door to come in.
Then everyone came in fussing around me asking me why did I suddenly disappeared. They thought I was kidnapped and made a big fuss sending warriors everywhere to find me. They were sure that I was kidnapped but decided to check the palace to see if I went strolling and Blake 'smelt' me in this room. According to them they banged my door but since I didn't open Blake broke it thinking I am hurt. They asked me why I did that but I just looked blankly at them. All my emotions are drained empty and I don't have any strength. It is as if all my life force is drained out. They tried to make me talk but I refused to budge.
They asked me to come back to my room but I stayed in that room itself. Blake picked me up and took me to our, sorry, his room. I didn't protest, just laid limp in his hands. They set food before me to eat but I still looked blankly at them. Blake again tried to feed me and I again looked blankly at him not moving nor chewing the food the food he force fed into my mouth. I didn't know what they said or more like I couldn't hear what they said. I just stayed motionless and blank. I leave this room at every chance I get into some other room but each and every time Blake brings me back. Anything to stop seeing his face and hurting myself further. I don't eat too. Blake feeds me liquids mouth-to-mouth. Yes, mouth-to-mouth.
Since I wasn't eating when he force fed or gulped down whatever liquid he resorted to kissing me to feed. It pains me very much every time he kisses me to feed me but I keep all the pain inside without showing out anything. I remember the times when he kissed with all the love in the world and my heart breaks again. This pain is quite unbearable eating me slowly from the inside. This is my way of being stubborn and grieving.
I am generally a compromising person, I never stay angry with a person or hate some person. But when I am seriously hurt I stop responding and stay emotionless and blank. I also blank out what the other person is saying especially, Blake. I refuse to hear what he is saying. I don't even look at his face. The last before now, I looked at him was when he said those awful words to me. I never even glanced at his face a single time. Even when he feeds mouth to mouth I close my eyes so that I can't see him and shut my body senses not to feel him.
This happened only twice before in my life. First time for a week when my grandma died. I was quiet close to her and her death was quiet devastating to me. And the second time for two weeks. It was quiet severe and I had to be admitted in hospital since apart from being emotionless and blank I also don't eat. That was when I accidentally found out the adoption papers. Yes, I was adopted. My mom and dad are not bad to me, they are quite good to me but how do I put it there is no love. It is not like they can't have children.
My adopted mom decided not to have children but to adopt one for whatever reason. They never treated me badly but all our interaction were, how to put it, formal. So when I came to know I was adopted I wondered whether this formal interaction was due to me being adopted and not being their actual daughter. My strike went on for two weeks, I locked myself in for two weeks and two weeks later was admitted in hospital.
Gabbs then cried for me and I saw genuine worry on their faces. I believed then whether I was adopted or not it is not important what matters is that they do care for me. I lived with them all these years and know then well and that is how they are, even the interaction between my mom and dad. Even if they decided to have a child of their own they would have behaved the same with me. I felt quite foolish as to why I was throwing a tantrum like that since many people are suffering without parents or in homes where they were abused or something more devastating.
I am not that like, I had a shelter over my head, everything I need and caring parents and relatives and here I am being all sad and pitying myself. I felt quite foolish. They never knew the reason why I was like that since I never told them. They told me the truth when I was 18 that I was adopted but I still don't know why they never wanted to have a child of their own but an adopted one.
And this is the third and the time I am hurt the most. I expected this to continue for a minimum of three weeks but my dream disrupted. More than my blank looking state I have to something about my forth coming kidnap. I don't care whether I live or not but I for sure don't want to die in that bastard's hands and not to forget Gabbs. Her state was critical when I was kidnapped last time and if it happens again, no it is going to happen again.
If she starves herself again then it would be bad for the baby. She is in the initial stage which is very dangerous. She might put herself and the baby in danger, even if the baby is born it might suffer due to malnutrition. If being motionless and blank is my way of grieving, Gabbs does it by starving herself which I don;t want her to do for sure, especially in her current state. Think, think. You need to do something for her safety. What? What should I do? Idea. Let us just hope it would work.
I went to Gabbs room and knocked lightly so as not to wake up Gabbs. It's after midnight. I don't want to disturb her sleep and it would be better if she is asleep. Erik is a vampire with sensitive hearing so I am sure he would be able to hear me. Erik opened the door and was shocked to see me, a little joy at first but then again scared as to why I was there. Was I really that scary that day for him to still fear me?
"Is she sleeping?" I asked in a whisper with a cold expression. He nodded. I signaled him to shut the door and come out quietly which he did and soon after I dragged him with me to the library.
"What is the matter?" He asked a little wary.
"I am going to be kidnapped soon." I said ice cold.
He gasped. "How do you know?"
"I had a dream again."
"How can you say so? May be you were just scared from the last time and had some random dream."
"Erik! I know. I am sure." I said sharply.
"What? Did you tell Blake? We have to try to protect you at least." He said and was about to get out when I caught his wrist.
"Listen carefully Erik. Gabbs shouldn't know about this." At this he turned around his full attention on me. "Her health was stabilized recently.If she know I am kidnapped she will starve herself again and we can't have that. The baby will be in serious danger. I have an idea. I will talk to her into taking a vacation saying it would be good for her health. When I am kidnapped without her knowing take her into a vacation. Don't come back till I am back. If I am not back...................then wait until she gives birth to tell her that I will never be back. This is not just for her baby but also for Gabbs."
Erik growled. "You will not be kidnapped. We will tighten your security. Even if you still get kidnapped we will definitely bring you back."
"Hmm. I am entrusting Gabbs to you even though I don't want to. If anything happens to her or the baby, this time even Gabbs too won't be able to stop me from killing you. Understand?"
Erik nodded furiously, not scared of me but anger surging through his eyes for whatever reason it might be, may be because I doubted the safety of Gabbs with him since these vampires are too prideful for their own good. Erik's eyes glistened as if he is mind linking and soon enough Blake came barging through the doors, furious to say the least.
He spotted me and immediately engulfed in a hug. My whole body shivered at his touch but I shut down all the emotions deep down.
"I will not allow him to kidnap you again." He shouted furious and his body trembling.
Why do you care? It would be helpful to you since you don't want me as your mate.
"Like hell I am going to let you be kidnapped in my presence. He will be dead before he can lay a hand on you." Blake said tightening his grip around me. I stood limp in his arms with a cold face not returning the hug. If you think I am letting you hurt me again, you are sadly mistaken mister. I am not some kind of toy that you can play with. Acting cold a day and warm another day.
***************************************************************************************Sorry, got some problem with my phone so I couldn't update quick. Sorry for the delay.
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