Chapter 4
"Get it Chase! YES WHOO!"
"and we have a winner, I take it you want a prize for your lady son."
"Eww, she's not my girlfriend!" Chase snorted giving Marcia a fake look of disgust, though surprisingly when she looked away I could see the hurt in her eyes. Chase obviously saw it too, as the man behind the stall handed him a stuffed toy. He was about to hand it over to her but stopped when he saw me. Oh yeah, we're supposed to be dating, I sighed to myself and looked towards Chase, only to notice he still had the stuffed toy in his hands, looking at me unsure so I gave him a go-for-it look. He continued to look at me uncertain at first, so I nodded to him and with that he handed it over to her.
"Here, gosh don't cry over it, I was only joking" He frowned looking annoyed, but there was something in his eyes which made me suspicious, in a way that almost made me think he was going to give it to her before he even won the game, to begin with...
Marcia frowned even more, but then a mischievous smile stretched across her face, as she bashed him over the head with it.
"Ow!" He responded, rubbing his head though it was obvious it wouldn't have hurt. Marcia like her usual self,-stuck out her tongue and wrapped her arm around mine then proceeded to drag me off.
"Can we go on a ride now!" One of the little creat... I mean girls asked.
"Yeah, I was thinking of going on the Screamer" Marcia smiled kindly, taking their hands and leaving me standing on my own. It didn't look scary, but fairground rides always seemed to freak me out when I remembered that the rides were set up by random fair guys each time they stopped in a new place. There was something about the people at fairs, which had my nerves on edge. I looked to my right and saw a guy in the control room. He had a cigar sticking out between his lips. Greasy dark hair scraped back into an elastic band at the nape of what was left of his neck- the rest of it was buried within a mountain of fat... I'm getting off topic. What I'm trying to say is, do I really trust these guys with my life? No. So why the heck would I get on his ride? There is no guarantee he's put it up right. What if he forgot a bolt or something? Then the cart would fly off the edge and bye-bye life! I snapped out of it when I saw the control man hiss at me. Hiss at me! I. Am. So. Dead.
"Is someone scared of the scary ride?" An annoyingly familiar voice spoke from behind me.
"Fuck off."
I was determined not to look at him as I joined Marcia and Chase in the Queue.
"Marcia I want to go with you!" The big one squealed, and she agreed.
"Then can I go with you, Chase?" The little one whispered putting her arms up in the air so he could pick her up.
"Sure thing princess. You guys are cool with going together right?" He asked us casually. Great I thought to myself. I didn't look at Quinn, but I could almost feel the smirking gaze fixed on my back.
"Yeah sure" He answered for us.
We were nearing the front of the queue when I felt a hand go beneath my top, gently rubbing circles into my back. I jumped snapping my head to see Quinn was uncomfortably close to me, our chests were centimeters apart. I felt sparks radiate through me from his touch. Cliche much? My wolf laughed at me, but it was the only way I could explain what his touch felt like. It was as if his touch felt warm and comfortable, yet it also left me wanting to close the small distance between us and wrap my arms around him and kiss those lips of his. With that thought, I began to step away only to have his grip tighten and pull me to roughly back to his chest. My breath rushed out of me, as I felt breath on my neck.
"Relax, I'll keep you safe" he whispered in my ear, as he loosened his grip on my back. I gulped as an involuntary shiver ran through my body. What the fuck is going on? I twisted slightly so I could put some distance between us. He smirked at me, making me want to hit him... or kiss him... Damn, why is he playing with me! I wanted to tell him to stop touching me. I wanted to make a massive scene and ask him to fuck right off, but as I looked into his amused eyes, I just couldn't. There was something about him that made me want to... No, I can't believe I even thought that, but it's true. I wanted to wrap my arms around him and protect him. I wanted nothing to hurt him... I didn't want to hurt him. I gave him the biggest glare I could muster up and turned away from him, to face the looming death trap... I mean ride.
I didn't understand him. He confused the hell out of me. He was a wolf like me so how could he be gay? It doesn't make any sense. I'm the freak! Not him, so why the hell does he touch me like that?!
"How many?" I was snapped out of my thoughts to realize we were now at the front of the queue. Damn, I didn't get to give Marcia a final goodbye...
"Come on" Quinn pulled on my arm... Okay, so I might just be freaking out slightly... Is it supposed to be making that awful clanging noise?!
My heart was racing as Quinn pulled the safety bar across both our laps and just like that the ride started.9
"Ethan don't tell me you're actually scared of this, or are you just faking it so I can comfort you?" He smirked.
"You're so up yourself, you know that?"
"I can think of much more pleasant places to be up" He whispered huskily, and I jerked away slightly as his hand went to rest on my upper thigh. How can he be so... so gay! He is NOT gay its impossible, so why is he suggesting getting into my pants?! I was about to put him in his place when the car jolted forward, and I stopped breathing, but once we got to the bottom, I relaxed. The cart hadn't flown off the track, so I think its safe to say the ride is safe, now to deal with one last little problem. I thought to myself as I grabbed hold of his hand, which was still on my thigh and shoved it off.
"Don't touch me!" I growled at him seriously, and he immediately held an expression of hurt. I regretted making him upset, but I didn't regret it enough to take it back. I didn't want him touching me. Even though his touch felt so right, so safe. I couldn't like him. I couldn't let this go on. I've known this guy for what? Two days? And he's already messed with my head. If this continues what's to stop it from getting out of hand? I DON'T want to come out. I cant. I'm third in command of one of the most powerful packs in the world. I'd get kicked out of it for sure if people found out. Alpha Klaus was a nice guy, but I knew that even he would find it hard to accept. As alpha he has a reputation to uphold, what would it look like when a gay partly ran the most powerful pack in the US? It wouldn't happen, Klaus wouldn't let it. He'd probably demote me from my status... Or kick me out of the pack all together... and then my father. Urg, don't even go there. It's pretty safe to say that as soon as he found out about his gay son, I wouldn't have a father anymore... Luckily he couldn't kick me out, because I was living in the pack house with Klaus and Nick... but what's to say they won't kick me out too?
The thoughts were too much, just the idea of what would happen made me realize I NEVER wanted to come out, ever. I would be losing my whole life. My pack, my family and my career- by career I mean the college fund, which I would no longer have. Would my parents even give it to me when they found out?
"That was amazing!" Marcia's screeching in my ear snapped me out of my thoughts.
"What was?" I asked confused, only now realizing we weren't on the ride anymore. Wow, I must have really zoned out.
"The ride dimwit!"
"Oh"
"What's up with you? You look like you've just seen a ghost" She was wrong I hadn't seen a ghost. I had seen something much worse than that. I'd seen my future self as an out of the closet gay.
I laughed it off uncomfortably.
"Er, guys do you want to go on the waltzer?" Chase asked unsurely. Apparently, the awkward atmosphere had caught on.
"Yes!" squealed the little girls in unison, so we all followed them onto the next ride. This time though Chase went with Quinn and one of the girls, while Marcia and I went with the other one in another cart.
"Are you going to tell me what's going on with you two?" I saw that one coming. I thought to myself as I stare off into the sky.
"I can't do it" I frowned, for some reason I wanted to tell her, I guess because she was the only one I'd come out too.
"Can't do what?"
"I can't feel for him," I whispered. Safe in the knowledge that she was the only one that could hear me; well her and the little girl, but I doubt she knew what we were talking about.
"Why not? I thought you liked him."
"That's the problem" I sighed. "I do like him, but"
"But?"
"But I can't!"
"Why not?" She frowned completely clueless. It wasn't surprising, she wasn't a werewolf, in fact, she didn't know about anything supernatural just like the rest of the humans in the world. So I couldn't tell her about the pack situation.
"My father" But I could tell her about my father.
"You don't think he would accept you?" She frowned.
"No, I don't think. I know."
"You don't know unless you try" I raised my eyebrows her.
"You can't just 'give-it-a-try' and see what happens. There's no restart button" I frowned, trying not to get angry with her.
"He's still your father."
"You don't realize that he's not just my father, he's also the biggest homophobe I've ever met.
"Oh" was her response and I wasn't surprised. Now she knew where I was coming from. Little did she know that my father was only half of the problem.
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