YN's Point Of View
"Yn?" I heard Luke. His voice unsure and upset. I hope he wasn't crying because of me. "It's me," I say. "It can't be, you're supposed to be dead," He says quietly. "I know but I'm not, I'm alive," I say taking my hand off his face and walking away from his trying to look for the light switch to lit up the room even though it only lit the room up a little bit. "Where are you?" He asked.
I didn't say anything as I ran my hand along one of the walls in search of the light switch. "Yn" I hear him say. "Yn please answer me" He begs. " I'm looking for a light switch," I say back and he went silent. I felt the switch and pressed it, the room lighting up a little. I turned around and then saw Luke standing in the middle of the room, looking at me, shocked.
"Yn?" He called, more like he was asking than calling my name. Did he think he was dreaming when I was replying to him or what? Whatever it was, he started walking over to me, I stood there watching him. He stopped in front of me, looking at me. He then placed his hand on my face, I closed my eyes. His touch sparked a memory.
'"Do you want some?" I ask offering Luke the candy floss stick, he took it off me and bit into it, moving it away from his mouth some of the candy floss stuck around the top of his mouth looking like he had a moustache a pink one, I couldn't help but let the laughter escape my mouth at the sight.
"What's so funny?" He asks as he looks at me. "You have a moustache made out of candy floss," I say. "Hey I'm made out of candy," He says jokingly, I giggle. I quickly take my phone out of my pocket and swipe to the camera. "Say cheese," I say, "Cheese"
I take a photo where he's smiling with the candyfloss still in place. "Hey, it looks good," I say showing him. "Of course it does, it's me in the picture," he says cockily while I shake my head while smiling.
"Your so cocky, Luke poo," I say, he frowns at me which I bob my tongue out at him. "What are you going to do with that photo?" He asks wiping his mouth to get rid of the candy floss. "I don't know yet"
"Luke look a Ferris wheel," I say, "come on let's go on it," he says grabbing my hand and we walk over to it.
"How many?" The man asks us as we approach the Ferris wheel. "Two," Luke says in a duh tone. The man nods his head and we walk and sit down. The man soon pushes the bar down, locking it in place. The wheel soon moved, our cart going up higher as more people got seated into the carts and as more people got seated, we just kept going up and up.
Luke placed his arm around my shoulder, I leant my head on his shoulder as the Ferris wheel started to go round. " This is nice" I hear Luke say making me smile."Yeah what more could a girl ask for, a nice ride on a Ferris wheel, lovely company," I say, sitting up properly. " you know what would make it so much better, " Luke says, I look at him eyebrows raised. "What?" I ask, he smiles at me before leaning closer to me and kissing me.
Kissing him back, I smiled through the kiss as our lips moved together slowly, that's when I started getting the warm feeling in my stomach, butterflies you may say. It only happened when I kissed Luke, I guess I really do like him. "Cart number 5, can you please stop the PDA , we do not allow this on our Ferris wheel" the owner of the Ferris wheels' voice comes through the speakers.'
I opened my eyes, looking at Luke. He had a look of concern on his face, "you okay? " He asked me. I nodded my head, "I'm fine" I say. He soon wrapped his arms around me, tightly. "I can't believe your alive. I thought you were dead" He said, I wrapped my arms back around him, taking in the warmth, his smell. He felt safe.
I closed my eyes as I leant my head on his shoulder. " I can't believe your alive, after all, this time. I was blaming myself for your death and your alive. They didn't believe me that you were, they thought I was going crazy but I wasn't. Your alive and I'm so happy that you are. I've missed you so much" I hear him say, I didn't say anything I kept on hugging him as he carried on speaking.He was glad to see me alive now but he doesn't know the truth yet, but when he does I'm scared he'll hate me.I don't want that, not when I can remember him.
The memories we shared.
I couldn't remember some things like what happened before my accident but Luke I can remember him. Now I had him back, I couldn't lose him. Not now. I felt guilty about what I did to him about tormenting him. He was so happy to see me but I knew that would change when he found out what I did. I couldn't let him find out by somebody else, I had to tell him.
I pushed my self away from him, breaking the hug, he just looked at me. I had to tell him before somebody else did. If anyone was going to break his heart it was going to be me, not anybody else, me.
" I need to tell you something luke," I say, he nodded his head. He then reached for my hand but I shook my head and placed both of my hands in my pockets and I walked away from him and sat down on the floor.
"Yn, what's wrong? " He asked, walking over to me, he sat down in front of me. "What do you have to tell me?" He asked me.
I just looked at him, " I'm afraid that the things I'm going to tell you are going to make you hate me" I say tearing up. "Why would I hate you, yn. I love you. Nothing you could ever say will change that" He says then leans closer and wipes my tears with his finger. "I've missed you like crazy," he says, rubbing my face with his thumb.
"Please don't touch me," I say taking his hand away from my face, he sat back down, a confused look on his face. "Why?" "Because I know if you keep touching me I'm going to crave your touch but your not going to want to touch me after I tell you," I say, crying again.
"Yn that isn't true," He says softly. He leans forward again to touch me but I shuffle back. "Please don't Luke" I beg.
"Okay, I won't touch you but just tell me what's bothering you so badly" Luke pleaded with me. Sighing, I just looked at him. "You were tormented about my death, " I say slowly. "How do you know about that?" He asked me.
I looked down at my fingers, not saying a word. "Yn how do you know about that?" He asked me again. " the envelopes, the brown envelopes, the little letters inside," I say, looking back at him. He was staring at me. He just bit his lip as he continued staring. "someone sent them to you" I say.
"I know someone did but I don't know who. Who would be so sick to do that?" He asked. "It hurt me those letters. Making me feel so guilty and heartbroken, the pain. Everything" he started saying while his eyes teared up. "Yn, I thought I lost you ..." he stopped talking.
"Luke I know you probably wondering how I know about the envelopes," I say, he nods his head at me while wiping his eyes with his sleeve one by one. " I do, yeah" "well I know about them because I was the one who was posting them to you but you need to listen to me-"
" you- you posted them to me?" He asked me. I nodded my head, the tears rolling down my face. "Why would you do that to me?!" He asked raising his voice." I loved you and that is how much you loved me by not only making me think you were dead but making me feel guilty over you not being around. How sick is that, your fucking sick" He shouted, getting up off the floor and walking away from me.
"I'm sorry," I say quietly while crying. " you're sorry because that makes everything alright does it? Because you're sorry. Sorry doesn't mean jack shit to me, yn. You're a sick bitch and to think I was in love with you now that makes me sick" He says harshly, looking at me.
"I'm sorry, I didn't know-" I was about to say but was cut off by him walking over to me and grabbing me and pulling me up and pushing me hard against the wall. I looked at him, his eyes teary and filled with anger and betrayal.
" You know something yn, thinking you were dead hurt me and thinking it was my fault made me feel sick to my stomach but now hearing what you did to me makes me hate you. Hate you that much I wish you were dead" He said.
I shake my head, "you don't mean that" I say, he snickered. "Don't I? Because nobody knows your alive, everyone else thinks your dead. Maybe it would be better if you were dead because nobody would know any better " he says, not breaking eye contact with me.
His words hurt. Killed even.
I slapped him and he let go of me and held his cheek. His eyes, showing he was hurt by my action but his words hurt me. He then went and sat down at the opposite end of the room to me as I sat back down and brought my knees up to my chest.I got him back and then lost him again, maybe he was right, maybe it would be better if I was dead. I closed my eyes and started remembering again, more memories of Luke and I.
'"Hey look a shooting star make a wish" Luke says, pointing to it. Following his gaze, I saw the star. " I don't wish on stars," I say looking back at Luke. Luke just looked at me, eyebrows raised. "Why not?"Because if you want something so badly you would make it happen, wishing on a star what is that going to do? You're telling your wish to a star which can't do anything to help you get your wish or make it come true. So why to wish for something that can't make your wishes come true when you can make your own wishes come true by making them happen" I say.
"That was deep," Luke says chuckling. "Yeah," I say, the Ferris wheel started moving again, then stopped, moved again, stopped and kept doing that till we were at the bottom.The owner opened the bar, Luke stepped out and I followed him. The man shook his head at us. "You teenagers really need to learn not to show too much PDA," the man says looking at us, disgustedly.
Luke wraps his arm around my waist before he looked at the man. "I don't see anything wrong with showing a little affection. Everybody does it, teenager and adults, what's the big deal?" Luke asks. The man rolls his eyes at him, "just get out of the way of the Ferris wheel, you young hooligan" he says scoffing.
Me and Luke walked away, Luke ranting about how much of an asshole the owner of the Ferris wheel was. "You know what I feel like going back and making out with you right in front of his precious Ferris wheel and really showing him what extreme PDA can be like," Luke says worked out, I just looked at him and grinned.
"Why are you grinning like that?" He asks, "it's just the way you've got so worked up about us getting told off for kissing on the Ferris wheel," I say. "I'm sorry, he really annoyed me" he starts apologising. "No need to apologise, Luke, your allowed your opinion and your allowed to voice it," I say, he nods his head as he intertwined our hands together.'
As soon as once finished another one started.
' By the time the song had finished Luke was just turning down into my street. He soon pulled up outside of my house. He turned the keys turning off the ignition. He looked at me as I looked at him.
"I don't want to get out," I say as I looked at him while resting my head on the chair. He just smiled. " then don't," He says, I just looked at him. "I have to at some point tonight," I say. He nods his head, "you have a point or less" "or less what?" I question he just bites his bottom lip while looking at me before he speaks.
"Or less you stay at my house tonight" he suggests, " you want me to stay at yours? " I ask, he nods slowly. "Only if you want to that is," Luke says looking at me, I thought for a couple minutes.
"Luke I-" I start saying, he just looked at me waiting for my answer. "I'd love too but my parents are expecting me back and they would get worried if I didn't return home," I say, he sighs but nods understandingly.
"Your right maybe some other time?" He says, "yeah maybe this weekend," I say, he nods and smiles. "This weekend," he says before he takes the car keys out of the car and opens his door and steps out closing the door behind him. Seconds later the passenger door opened, undoing the seatbelt I stepped out holding my things in my arms, I just managed to close the door when Luke took the things out of my hands and walked with me up to my front door.
Unlocking my door, I put my things inside of the door before turning back to Luke to see him standing there, hands in his pocket looking like he had something to ask. "You alright luke? You look like you want to ask me something" I say looking at him, he nods his head slowly. "I do"
I just waited for him to ask his question, he rubbed the back of his neck, "I don't know how to ask this but I'm just going to ask you, if you say no that's fine because I was a player and all and I know you might not want to risk getting your heart broken by me" He says.
"Why would I say no?" I ask him, "you might when you hear my question," he says. what could he possibly ask which I could say no to? "Will you be my girlfriend?" He asks me, I just looked at him. He looked at me, I was just about to say something when the door opened wider.
"Yn your parents wanted me to ask when you're coming inside as it's getting late" I turn to see Cameron standing there looking at me.
"I'll be in soon, can't you see I'm talking to Luke," I say to Cameron, he raises his eyebrow to me then looks at Luke. "So about your question," I say looking back at Luke. "What question? " Cameron asks, I roll my eyes and look at him. "It's none of your business," I say getting annoyed. "Well, what did he ask that is so important you have to stand on the door in the cold," Cameron says sarcastically.
"I asked her to be my girlfriend, happy? Now go inside and stop being so damn annoying" Luke says coldly to Cameron.Cameron scoffs looking at me, "you seriously can't be thinking of dating this player" he says.
"Well, she wouldn't date you would she?" Luke says harshly, Cameron looked at him then smirked. " Well, atleast I haven't slept with most of the girls at my high school like you have!" Cameron spits back.'
Cameron was living at my house before.. everything happened, now it made sense why he came and what Carter said I was a part of the plan from the very beginning.
I looked over at Luke and he was sat against the wall. Not saying a word. Sighing I pulled my sleeves down on my jumper. ' "Luke where are you going?" I asked following him. "Away from you," he said coldly. "Luke I don't want to fall out-" I don't want to hear what you've got to say yn. You keep saying you will believe me about things but I tell you about Cameron and you don't believe me. You think it's because I don't like him, yes I don't like the guy but no I would never make something up like that, I thought you knew me better than this but obviously, you don't. You don't know me at all. I'm not going to wait around for you to trust me. I'm sick of that. I love you I really do, but I could do without feeling like this every time you don't believe me about something. I don't need that and if you don't believe me then I'm better off without you in my life this time."Luke says turning back to look at me.
"Are you saying we're over?" I asked crying already knowing the answer. "We're over and it's for good this time," he says before turning back around and walking out of my house and not looking back'
A number of times I've lost him and got him back, I was remembering. Everything was starting to come back to me, memory after memory. School, my friends, my family, Luke. Sacrificing myself for Luke... being here but the one thing that didn't make sense is, what did Luke do to Jacob's sister to start all of this revenge?
" I never meant to hurt you, Luke, I didn't know what I was doing and if you only knew the whole story. You would understand. I wouldn't deliberately hurt you, not when I love you" I say breaking the awkward silence.
I closed my eyes, getting tired. Luke wasn't going to answer me, he made it clear he hated me and I didn't blame him.
I hated myself for what I did to him. " Saying you love me doesn't mean anything anymore, it's just words," Luke said, not one of us said anything again. Just sitting in silence. Whatever I said from now on, wasn't going to fix this, the damage had been done. And I had to face the facts, this time it was over.
An. What do you think of this part?
Will Luke listen to yn if she explains what happened?
Or is there no saving them?