(Jaydon’s P.O.V)
After speaking with Lissy about talking to Anthony, I had headed straight towards his place, my confidence built up. I was going to do it. Though as soon as I pulled up to his driveway, it suddenly all disappeared, and here I was now sitting in my car, deciding whether or not I should go in. Beside me, my phone vibrated, and it was a text from Melissa:
You can do it Jayjay! Call me once who have spoken to him. Love you.
I sighed softly and placed my phone back where it was in the cup holder and got out of my car, shutting the door, and heading towards his door. I rang the doorbell and waited. I heard footsteps come from inside the house, and in the next moment the door opened to show Anthony’s mother. She was always the one to answer the door, it never seized to surprise me.
“Hey,” I spoke softly. I was just the other day I was standing here, with the same intention to talk to Anthony. “Is Anthony home?”
“Yeah, he’s upstairs, in his room.” His mother let me in, but something on her face was different. She wasn’t in a good mood, that much was evident. I wonder if Anthony had told her something about me? Or what happened today? I shook my head, casting a smile towards his mother and headed upstairs.
I didn’t even bother to knock on his door, just opened it. Inside I saw him on his bed asleep, and curled up in his blankets. I probably would be doing the same thing if I wasn’t here to talk to him. There was no indication that he had heard me come in, so I went on and moved to his bed and lay down beside him.
Not speaking a word, I just stared at him, like I had this morning. I really did miss this. But couldn’t he see that what he did to me, hurt me? It wasn’t just going away, and the “we’ll stay in touch, don’t worry”, he completely cut me off from his life, like he had no intention that he would come back, but he is now.
“Jay… You know I don’t like it when you stare at me,” Anthony mumbled and opened his eyes to look at me.
“I know,” I offered a little smile, but his expression stayed placid. “Look, I really need to talk to you.” I propped my head up against a pillow and looked at him.
“Go ahead.”
I sighed and took a breath in, “I might have been a douche lately, but look at it from my side. You left me – telling me to forget about you – forget you, after we’ve been dating, for what, 3 years? You didn’t even tell me you were leaving, you didn’t even give me time to let it sit and register what was going on. Then you tell me to forget you. Not even to stay in touch. And I realize that over the years we’ve been apart that we would drift, but just to go all cold turkey on me?
“Then you suspect, coming back, that everything will just be the same? Well, I’m sorry to break it to you, but it’s not, nor it will be. We’ve grown up, we’ve experienced different things. I’m different and you’re different. Let’s face it, we’re going to have to get along with each other, since we do have the same friends here. But you can’t expect me to just fall back into the role of your boyfriend. All I think we can be is friends, and I hope that will be okay with you.” I spoke quickly, getting everything in before Anthony could speak his mind.
“I know,” Anthony spoke and closed his eyes, pulling his blankets closer to his body, “And I regret everything I said that day I left. I just guessed you would be happy that I was coming back, and that we could get back together. Every day I was away from you, I missed you. I never got over you. I couldn’t date other people because all I ever thought about was you, and there wasn’t enough room for someone else. And when my parents told me that we were coming back, I was happy. I sent you that letter, and I guess – I guess I just thought we would get back together, assuming you missed me just as much as I missed you.”
The whole time he spoke, he had his eyes closed, and even when they were closed I could see that he was holding back tears, tears long needed to be free. I sighed and moved closer, wrapping my arm around his body, pulling him closer. “It’s okay.” I murmured softly, kissing his forehead softly.
“Don’t do that.” Anthony seethed and pulled away, but I didn’t let him move far.
“Don’t do what?”
“Act like that, it confuses me,” He spoke softly, his eyes slowly opening to look at me. They were glassy and tears forming in them. “You say you don’t want to be with me then you go and do that. You despised me when I got back, then last night we… you know.”
“We didn’t do anything, don’t worry…” I beckoned his body closer to mine. He resisted, but after a couple more urging movements to pull him closer he gave in, nuzzling his head against my collarbone. “I get it. What you said about coming back and assuming that we would get back together. We were close, and I did miss you for the longest time. Also, I really didn’t see anyone, but you know me, you know that I act differently than others. I need time to forgive, and heal from what has happened. It’s slow, but I’m changing. Or I wouldn’t be here, right now.”
We stayed there a moment, in silence. With me holding him, and his head nuzzled perfectly against my neck as if it was meant to be there. I stroked his back gently, moving up and down to his hair then back to his back. He shook in his arms, like as if he was scared this was all a dream, and when he woke up I’ll just be the same old douche like I was this morning.
“When you first messaged me, telling me that you were coming back,” I spoke gently, “I wasn’t going to allow myself to fall back into you. I was going to ignore you, as if you weren’t even back, but I can’t – I will admit that I loved you, and I still do, no doubt about that… But I still need time, okay?”
Anthony nodded against my neck, his arms slowly going around me and pulling me close. I allowed him, only tightening my arms around him, and embracing him there, and not letting go.
(Stephan’s P.O.V)
“Why are you ignoring Jayden!” Melissa’s small voice rang through my phone. I groaned and rubbed my head. It hurt, but that was probably from the large amounts of alcohol I have consumed today, while searching for reasons why Jayden had a powerful and addicted drug with him.
“I’m not ignoring him!” I hissed back, rolling over onto my stomach, on my bed.
“He’s noticing, you know.” Her voice almost narrowed in a sense, “Not to mention that he does have a lot going on right now with Anthony. He could really use his best friend right now.”
“You sound my mother, woman!” I mumbled against my pillow, but it was still clear enough for Melisa to hear.
“Fine, whatever,” There was a pause, “When you ruin your friendship with him, don’t be coming to me to try and mend it or Anthony because we wont help you, and you’ll be lost without, probably maybe, the one person in the world who loves you more than yourself.” With that she hung up, leaving me hanging on the line, my mouth ajar.
She was right though. Jayden was probably one of the only person who did care about me. Sure there were my parents, but they had to because that was in their contract. I kept my head buried in my pillow. I had no attention moving anytime soon with my pounding headache, and I couldn’t go anywhere because I was too wasted to drive. I guess mending things with Jayden could wait till tomorrow when I was feeling better. Only a few minutes later I fell asleep.
(Jayden’s P.O.V)
“I have to go, but come around later, my mom is making her notorious Spaghetti,” I tried moving away from Anthony, and in all honesty I didn’t want to. Being here, now, was perfect. It almost seemed as if we were back together or maybe it was the fact that we meshed together real well, and that was why it was so easy getting along while we were dating. But I made a promise that I wouldn’t bring it upon myself to date him again, I couldn’t.
“Okay,” A small smile appeared on Anthony’s lips, even though I could tell that he was sad that I was leaving. “I’ll try to be there.” I returned with a smile, and leaned down to kiss his forehead lightly, before getting up, and out of his bed. I could feel the warmth from his body disappear. With a final wave I exited out of his room, and descended down his stairs to the front door.
I let myself out, and headed towards my car. Well, that went better than I had expected. Maybe I wasn’t as mad at him as I thought. Sure, anyone would be mad if their lover left them suddenly without a word. I just couldn’t. I hated him for so long, it was time to take a break from that now, and enjoy that a long lost friend has come back. I still had aching feelings, whether it be from anger for him leaving or yearning to be back with him, it could all be pushed aside to simmer down.
I drove back home, a little lighter, now that I had everything off my chest. I felt good for the first time in five years, and there was even a smile on my face; a real one. It felt nice to be able to feel this way again, it was almost like a drug.
Like always, my mom was no home and away at work for the day. I should be at work right now. That’s when realization hit. Cancer. The cancer that the doctor told me about. No, this had to be a dream. This couldn’t be real! I ran up the stairs, looking for the pill bottle that he had prescribed me. As I entered the room, I instantly saw the pair of pants that I was wearing the day I went. I walked over to them, and reached into my pockets, but ended empty handed.
No, this couldn’t be right. They were in these pants, I could’ve sworn… With a shake of my head, I began sifting through every pair of pants that I owned, but I still couldn’t find them. Did I drop them in Stephan’s car? No. No, that couldn’t of happened. I thought myself. If he saw that bottle of pills after I told him that the doctor said nothing was up, he would kill me.
Wait… He was ignoring me. Did he know? Did he know what situation I was in, and wasn’t talking to me because I lied to him? That couldn’t be it. How would he guess that? I had to find out.
I pulled out my cell phone from my pants pocket, and dialed his number. The phone rang, rang, and rang again. It went to voice mail. I called him a couple more times and sent him a few texts, still no reply. I had to clear this up… I had to reassure him. Reassure him of what? I couldn’t tell him that I had cancer and I wasn’t going to be taking cemo. He would kill me! Then again, he was ignoring me right now, and that was bad enough.
I grabbed my car keys. I would go over, clear everything up, but I couldn’t tell him. Unless he already knew then maybe he would understand… I had nothing going for me, maybe he would understand, and be there for support. I sighed and drove down the street towards his house. He lived across town, that would give me enough time to come up with something.
(Stephan’s P.O.V)
I fell asleep. God, I was having the worst day so far. I woke up in bed, drooling on my arm. But why did I wake up? The door bell rang; that must have been what woke me up… I groaned and pushed myself up, as the door bell rang again. Jeez, whoever was there was certainly impatient. I attempted to stretch while I walked down the hallway to the front door, running a hand through my hair.
The door bell rang once more before I opened it. I was about to yell, but then I noticed it was Jayden. That instantly woke me up. He came here to complain about me ignoring him. I knew ignoring him would come back to bite me in the ass. He looked really worried for some reason. Shouldn’t he be mad? I was ignoring him, and well, he didn’t have the greatest temper.
“I need to talk to you.” He pointed out and walked passed me, and down the hall to my bedroom. After I shut the front door, I joined him in my room. He seemed to be searching for something, but what was it? I yawned, and ran a hand down my face. “Have you been sleeping all day?” He stopped what he was doing and turned to look at me. He looked agitated now. So, what if I was sleeping? I had the mother of all hangovers right now, and it was my right to do what I want with my life. “I’ve been trying to reach you for the past hour, you idiot!” He groaned, and motioned for me to sit down. And I did just that. I moved across the room and sat down on my bed, slumping to the side a little, looking at him. He looked just plainly pissed now.
“Where are my pills?” That caught me off guard. Well, it shouldn’t have, I did take them. I motioned at my desk where they sat. He glanced behind him and snatched them off, shoving them in his pants. He looked at my expectantly, like as if I was going to say something. And I wanted to, but I didn’t know what. “Why did you take them?”
“Why would you need pills when you’re supposedly ‘fine’?” There it was, my questions coming out. He didn’t looked shocked at all.
“Okay, so maybe I wasn’t ‘fine’, but I don’t want you going around spreading that I’m taking oxycontin.” He narrowed his eyes, and continued, “I might have lied to you, but that’s because it’s nothing you need to freak out about.”
“Then why would it such a big deal whether you told me or not?” I narrowed my eyes also. There was something that he was hiding, I could just tell.
“Like I just said, I didn’t want you freaking out or anyone else freaking out for that matter,” He rubbed his temples, sighing, “I really don’t need any more shit after what has been going on lately, you know that.”
“Why do you need those pills?” I motioned to the pills bottle in his pants. He glanced down at them, pressing his lips together in a hard line.
“Chronic pain, it’s genetic.” I looked at him confused. I have never, ever, heard him complain about anything ‘hurting’. “It’s not bad now, obviously, but I gets worse… and worse… and the doctor said that when it gets to that point to take them. I’m sorry for not telling you Stephan.”
“And you think this is something that isn’t ‘a big deal’,” I asked, and he only shrugged. Sometimes he wasn’t the brightest. “Fine, whatever. At least you told me. I’ve been trying to figure out these last few days why you might need them and got stupid results, like cancer.” I chuckled slightly, and leaned back on my bed. I was still tired, and had a damn headache.
“You know google just makes the problem worse than it really is, you really shouldn’t be using it when it comes to medical problems.” He plopped down beside me, looking up at the ceiling.
“Yeah, I know.”
x~x~x
Gosh, I know it's been forever!! And I feel really, really, really, REALLY bad! But I hope that the wait was worth the while? Probably not... Hopefully. And I do mean hopefully, I will be able to work on it more and actually get somewhere in it, and I thank anyone who has been with this story since the beginning! ^^ Please keep me motivated to keep writing, it's what works best!!
I know a lot is happening at once and I hope it is annoying you or something, and if something is, please tell me? I really forgot what has happened, and what all is going to happen, but I'm sure we will get there :)
OH AND IT'S NO EDITED SO SORRY!!!