Based on the song "Love Me Like You Do" by Ellie Goulding
You're the light, you're the night
You're the color of my blood
You're the cure, you're the pain
You're the only thing I wanna touch
Never knew that it could mean so much, so much
Fading in, fading out
On the edge of paradise
Every inch of your skin is a holy grail I've got to find
Only you can set my heart on fire, on fire
You put your hand gently on Bruce's back, slowly running it along the muscles of his arms and across his back. Your fingers grazed his neck on their way into his hair and back to start the path all over again. It was fascinating to think about what this man could become, but at the same time be the most caring and gentle person you had ever met. It was amazing that someone could be so diametrically opposed within themselves, and it was equally amazing to you that he had it under control; especially on nights that you spent together. Nights like this one, when you lost sight of where your body ended and his began, when tongues were tangled and mouths searched each other in desperation, when emotions were high and self-control was never guaranteed.
"What are you thinking about?"
"You," you whispered. "What else would there be on my mind right now?"
Bruce rolled over to look at you, his eyes heavy but as relaxed as you had seen him in a long time. Work with the team had been particularly strenuous lately, and 'the other guy' had been getting a lot of business; it was hard to see the toll it had taken on him, and moments like this were meant to be appreciated for what they were.
"Me? Or the other me?" He was always worried about the day, or night, that might come when he didn't control the Hulk so well, and it terrified him to think that you would be there.
"Maybe a little of both."
He groaned and was about to roll away again when you grabbed his arm to hold him in place. "No, hear me out. I'm thinking about you and how you're able to handle so much and still be...you. You always act so surprised when I say that I love you, but I don't get that. It can't be all about the other guy, can it? Because you know I don't see him as a threat and I'm not scared. So why won't you believe me?"
He sighed and ran his fingers thru tangles of your hair that had fallen over your shoulders, gently uncoiling each curl and dropping it against your skin. "I believe you. I have to, because I love you too, and I can't imagine if you weren't in this with me."
~~~
"Hey, (Y/N), we could use a little help here! Your boyfriend is off the deep end!"
"Jesus, Tony, do you think maybe it's because you're working him so damn hard?" You were running as fast as you could to where the Hulk had lost control, but you weren't fast enough. You yelped as Tony flew past, sweeping low enough to grab you in his arms and carry you there.
"The more he does this, the harder it is for him to come out of it! You know that, Stark! This is your fault!"
"You think I don't know that? Save the guilt trip for later!" He flew low to drop you a few feet from the Hulk, turning to land and stand a short distance behind you if you needed him, but still out of sight.
The loud growl sent a chill through you, but you did your best to not show it, to not let him see that he was scaring you. You had promised Bruce that this side of him wasn't a threat, and it was all you could do to act like it was the truth. You weren't threatened when he was in control, unlike now, when he was standing over you and looking down at you with a confused look in his eyes.
"That's right, calm down. It's me." Raising your hands in front of you, trying to look unthreatening, you took a few steps closer. "Listen to my voice. You know me." You reached out a hand to touch him, but he took a step back. "Come on, you can trust me, Bruce."
At the sound of the name, the name you knew better than to say, the growl returned louder than it had been when you arrived. The Hulk reached down and swatted you away, your body solidly striking against a nearby tree. Even through the pain you were feeling, your thoughts were on Bruce and the hope that he wouldn't remember this, knowing what it would do to him; knowing that he would try to push you away. The last thing you saw was Tony lifting you into the air just before the Hulk could grab you.
When you woke in the infirmary a short time later, you could hear his voice in the background, talking about you. Tony was with him, and it sounded like they were in a heated discussion, but they were standing too far away for you to make out their words.
"Hey boys, you know it's hard for me to eavesdrop if you don't speak up."
You sat up slowly and deliberately, feeling each and every aching muscle in your body. Your head was pounding and spinning a bit, but you knew it could have been much worse. You tried to not make it appear as bad is it felt to save Bruce any more guilt than he had already placed on himself.
"Not one word, Banner," you said pointedly, "not one."
Bruce's mouth opened to speak but quickly shut again, and his gaze lowered to the floor as if he were being punished. He nodded and pulled a chair up next to your gurney and took your hand, silently sitting next to you.
"And as for you, Stark," you swung your legs over the edge of the bed, carefully dropping onto your feet as you tested your balance. "This has to stop. Using the Hulk as often as you are is going to destroy Bruce, do you understand? I won't stand by and watch this team destroy the man I love just so he can be a part of it."
"Yes, ma'am."
You looked at Bruce in shock, and he returned the look in kind. "Excuse me?"
"We'll ease up." Tony turned away and moved towards the door. "You're the boss, darlin'."
"That was too easy," you said. "Maybe he really does feel guilty."
~~~
For the next few nights, Bruce had been quiet; staring at the ceiling until he fell asleep, coming to bed after you were out, and rolling away any time you tried to touch him. It was clear that the guilt was still eating away at him, and he was still scared. You pushed yourself up behind him and wrapped your arm over his, intertwined your legs together, and began to softly kiss his neck, trying to connect with him. You could feel his body tense at your touch, but there was no room for him to roll any further away.
"(Y/N), what are you doing?"
"Has it been so long that you've forgotten?"
"No, but it just that...I don't think it's a good idea right now." Despite his refusal, he still reached up to take the hand that you had draped over him. You felt his fingers touch yours, but you pulled back as if his touch was painful.
"Okay," you sighed as you rolled away, shutting yourself down.
"Don't be mad at me. You know what this is about. You know what I'm feeling, because you know me." He paused, for so long that you thought he might be finished until his voice returned, quiet and uncertain. "You know me better than I know myself. It's cliché but it's true."
"I'm not mad."
"But that's your mad voice."
"I'm not mad." You reached up and turned off the light, pissed off as all hell.
~~~
You're the fear, I don't care
'Cause I've never been so high
Follow me through the dark
Let me take you past our satellites
You can see the world you brought to life
By the time you woke the next morning, he had already left. Honestly, he could have left right after you fell asleep, and you would have never known. From the wrinkles in the sheets and the position of the pillow, you had both maintained your distance on each side of the bed. You pulled yourself up to sit on the edge, looking at the clock, wishing for a way to turn back time to avoid this situation altogether.
Hoping to talk this through, you threw on your slippers and made way to the lab, assuming he would be there already. When you arrived you found Tony, but no sign of Bruce. It looked like he hadn't even been there yet today.
"Hey, Tony," you said with a small yawn, still not fully awake. "Any idea where Bruce might be?"
"He said he had some errands to run, or something." He waved his hand dismissively, his attention fully taken by whatever new gadget he was working on. "He said he would be out all day, and if I saw you that I shouldn't let you leave." He finally turned away to look at you, pointing a screwdriver in your direction.
"So don't leave." He held your gaze for a few seconds before he turned back to his work, "there, I've done my part. Now scoot."
This was strange that he would leave for the day and not leave at least a note for you. He must be pretty upset from the night before, and your attitude surely didn't help at all. You were beginning to feel bad for getting angry, when really what he needed was for you to be supportive while he worked it all out. When he finally arrived back to the tower hours later, you had vowed to be nothing but supportive and allow him to take all the time he needed. If you couldn't understand first-hand how he felt, then you couldn't judge how he handled it.
Hey, can you come to the balcony? I need to talk to you.
"He's here and he can't just come find me?" you mumbled to yourself, deciding to not text back and making your way to the elevator. I need to talk to you, it said. In the history of relationship conversations, those words are rarely good. Now you were getting nervous, and your stomach started to feel a bit nauseated. It wouldn't be the first time he had tried to end the relationship over the Hulk, and all you could think of now was the worst.
When the elevator opened, he was sitting alone, watching the city noisily move below, the sky darkening enough for the streetlights to come on and create a warm glow on his face. When he saw you, he reached out his hand for you to join him.
"Hey, honey, come sit by me."
"Are you okay?" you asked, sitting on his lap when he pulled you in. "Busy day?"
Bruce took a long breath and let it out slowly; he was nervous. "So I had a nice long talk with the other guy about you today. He's really sorry about all that stuff the other day, by the way." He smiled faintly, still letting his nerves get the best of him.
You chuckled a bit, imagining what that would look like if he were being literal. "Okay? Did you get everything worked out?"
"Sure did." He reached into his coat pocket to remove a small box, removing the ring to hold it so you could see. "We both agree that life without you is a terrifying thought, and we both agree that there is no one else that we'll ever trust or love as much as you. We would like to know if we could be so lucky as to have you as our wife."
Your gaze moved from him to looking down at your feet, hiding the smile that was turning into a laugh at his choice of words. "Well how could I say 'no' to that? It's not often that a girl gets a proposal from two guys at the same time and can actually accept."