Fade in to Church and Rayner talking with Sister.
Church: Well uh, welcome to Blue Team. I guess we should probably give you uh, some kind of orientation or somethin' like that. So this is the uh, this is the base here. This is the outside of the base. ...Inside's on the inside... go through that door, right there, get to the inside. Um, there's a ramp over here, there's another one on the other side. It's kinda smaller, does the same thing though. Uh, it's got a basement, ...nuhm, there's a middle part 'n' there's a top part... got some, you know blue flags here, on the outside, come in handy when you're, you know, tryin' to identify the colour of the base, it's blue. Anyway, that uh pretty much covers the base, so... anyway, yeah, that's it.
Sister: Cool.
Rayner: Exemplary explanation Church.
Church: I'm Church, I'm the leader. Everybody looks up to me. Pretty much the only rule for rookies on the Blue Team is: don't kill the leader. That's me.
Sister: You're not the leader.
Church: That's it–wait, what?
Sister: You said your name was Church, right? That means you're not the leader.
Church: Wha-h-how the hell would you know!?
Sister: Well they said that since your old captain died one of you is promoted to captain and they sent me to replace the missing troop.
Church: And who the fuck is that?
Sister: Some guy named... Ryle Rayner?
Rayner: Kyle Rayner.
Sister: Oh! Yeah that's it.
Rayner: Wait, seriously?
Church: Wha-how the fu- that can't be true! I was here way before Rayner got here! Not to mention I've been kinda carrying this team for awhile, y'know.
Sister: I don't know. They said something about paperwork and not wanting to do more work. Wasn't really paying attention.
Rayner: Oh yeah, I've been doing Captain Flowers' job ever since he died. Huh, in hindsight this was pretty inevitable.
Church: Nu-uh, no way. This is bullshit.
Rayner: Hmm, I guess I'll give it a shot-wait, now I have to watch my back for Caboose don't I? Shit.
Church: Doesn't sound so easy now, does it? Now give–
Rayner: Then again, can't be worse than having Church come up with all the plans.
Church: Oh fuck you, you dick.
Rayner: Alright moving on. So, tell me about yourself newbie. What's your training?
Sister: Training?
Rayner: Yeah. What've you been told so far?
Sister: Oh right. That's the base, and you're the leader, and I shouldn't kill you. Ever. ...Did I pass?
Rayner: No, I mean like what kind of military training do you have. Weapons?
Sister: Uh, those sound violent.
Rayner: Operations?
Sister: I don't even know how that works.
Rayner: Communications.
Sister: Say what?
Rayner: Huhhhh, intelligence?
Sister: Uhhh, huh?
Rayner: Nawshit.
Church: Hhh, great. Another idiot.
Sister: Yeah, sorry, doesn't sound like I have any of the skills you need. Unless you wanna see my ping pong ball trick.
Church: Yeah... wait, what?
Cut to Grif and Simmons running from right to left.
Grif: Slow down!
Simmons: There's no time, Sarge is gone! I was digging a hole, and I kept digging, but there was no Sarge, and then finally I dug deep enough, and I found another hole.
Grif: You dug a hole, and found a hole. Isn't that what a hole is?
Simmons: No no no, I mean a hole at the bottom. It opened in to some kind of, big cavern.
Grif stops running
Grif: A cavern? A cavern like a cave? Like a cave with bats?
Simmons: I don't know, why, are you afraid of bats or something?
Grif: Afraid of bats, no. Why would I be afraid of bats? And why would you even ask that question? Were there bats or something? That's kind of a weird thing to ask just for no reason.
Simmons: I didn't see any bats, okay?
Grif: Did you hear any bats?
Simmons: No.
Grif: Did you smell any bats.
Simmons: I don't know what bats smell like!
Grif: And let's hope you never find out. Is it getting dark? We should get inside.
Simmons: It hasn't gotten dark here in three fucking years, asshole.
Cut back to Church, Rayner and Sister, now joined by Tucker and his mutant baby.
Raynet: And this, is Tucker.
Tucker: Sup.
Sister: Hey.
Rayner: Tucker's job is to... I guess... kinda, look over everything? Yeah, recently we've all been kinda scattered around all over the place. Makes it a bit hard to know what's going on most of the time.
Tucker: I'm just chillin'. That's the only rule on Blue Team, Rookie: be cool.
Sister: I thought the only rule was "don't kill the leader."
Tucker: Yeah, but we break that rule all the time. That's what makes us so cool.
Sister: Awesome, on the Red Team, we make that rule-
Junior: Rawr, rawr rawr.
Sister: Oh cool, you have a dog?
Tucker: Uh, that's not a dog, that's my kid.
Sister: Oh, cool, you have a kid that looks like a dog?
Church: Nice save.
Cut briefly to Caboose exiting Blue Base toward the ramp.
Church: Hey, you know what? I think I have the perfect tour guide for you. Hey Caboose, come here!
Sister: I thought about having a kid once.
Tucker: Oh really? It's a lot of work.
Sister: Yeah, it seems like it would be hard. But I thought, you know, who wants to be known as the girl who's had seven abortions?
Tucker: Heh, yeheah... wait, what?
Rayner: That... cannot have been good for your body.
Church: Alright, this is Caboose. He can tell you everything you'd possibly need to know about Blue Base.
Caboose: Is she a mean girl, or a regular girl?
Church: Caboose, what did I tell you.
Caboose: That there are no regular girls.
Church: Exactly. Alright, so just stick with him, ask him any questions you have, aaand just don't bother me. Or Rayner. Or Tucker.
Caboose: What do I tell her?
Sister: Well, I already know the rule.
Caboose: I hate that stupid rule.
Tucker: Go show her Doc and Sheila.
Caboose turns to look back toward Blue Base, where Doc and Sheila are hanging out.
Caboose: The purple one is Doc, and the big one is Sheila.
A black figure is seen sneaking behind Church, Rayner, Tucker, and Junior.
Church: You know, I was really wishing that would take longer. ...And further away.
Sister: Who's the black one?
Church: The black one?
Rayner: Hmm? Nuh shit.
Sister: Yeah, the one in the black armor? The one standing right behind you guys.
Caboose: The black one, yeah. ...Wait, what?