Liam was on edge when Zayn was having his first therapy session. He expected a tantrum and for Zayn to storm from the room and not come back for hours. But Zayn stayed in the room for the full hour, and left giving the therapist a handshake and a polite goodbye.
"I'm shocked," Baela whispered, leaning against the corridor wall. "He's actually got manners."
Liam scoffed and Zayn approached them with suspicion. "What?""
"Nothing," Liam beamed. "How did it go?"
Zayn's eyes followed the next wolf who entered the room. He wasn't the only one in the pack who needed therapy. "It was awkward."
"First sessions usually are. It'll be better on Thursday!"
"I thought I was seeing her once a week?" Zayn questioned.
"Nope. You'll see her twice a week, maybe three times depending on how it goes."
Zayn slumped against the wall and crossed his arms.
"Can you come into my next session?" he asked Liam. "I just couldn't seem to speak at all."
Liam nodded. "If I'm allowed." He grabbed Zayn's hand, squeezing it tightly.
Baela smiled at their clutching grips.
"Are you hungry?" she asked, smoothing a handful of braids over one shoulder. She wore purple eyeshadow that matched her purple denim Jacket.
Liam's gaze was often drawn to her bright green eyes. Against her dark skin and purple eyeshadow, they popped beautifully.
"I'm fucking starving," Zayn said.
Liam shook his head, grinning as he followed them down the corridor. Zayn had eaten a lot for breakfast, yet he was always hungry, and so was Baela, and every other werewolf in the institute.
The only person who no longer ate like a werewolf was Solana. She didn't join them for breakfast and lunch very often now, but she was always there for dinner.
Though Liam felt as though she was wasting away, bit by bit. Losing a mate was slowly destroying her. Liam would have to talk to Zayn about helping Solana because he knew Zayn noticed too.
The canteen was busy and happy for the first time in a while. Wolves were smiling and laughing and feeling comfortable again in their Packhouse.
The lively chatter was a nice sound for both Zayn and Liam as they sat at their usual table. Solana's spot remained empty. Zayn stared at it for a moment, then checked his watch. "Should I go and get mum?"
Liam nodded to say yes. "You feel her pulling away too, don't you?"
"Yes. I should make her visit the therapist too."
The therapist was a human who knew everything about werewolves and how they lived, and their ranks, and their traits. The government gave therapists willingly, knowing that unstable werewolves caused trouble.
"I'll be back in a minute."
Zayn stood and Liam grabbed his wrist before he stormed through the canteen. Zayn turned with a puzzled look, but Liam pursed his lips, and Zayn then knew what he wanted. He almost felt as though he didn't deserve Liam's attention yet, but Liam deserved to be loved. Zayn crouched and softly kissed his cheek, then his lips. He ruffled Liam's hair and left with warmth circling his chest.
Zayn could breathe easier now that they were on good terms again. He could go up the stairs two at a time. Being with Liam gave him endless energy, physically and mentally.
He reached the third floor quickly and banged on his mother's door hard enough to startle her on the other side.
"Zayn, bloody hell," she muttered, smelling his scent. "Come in."
Zayn swung the door open to see her sitting by the window, staring into the woods beyond. She turned to face him with a weak smile. She didn't look well. Solana had lost a lot of weight over the past year and eight months. She was slow with every action, and tired from constant sleepless nights.
Zayn frowned at her long grey hair in a messy plait from the night before, and the bags under her eyes, and the paleness to her skin.
"Are you giving up?" he asked, instead of asking if she wanted lunch.
Solana blinked at his question. "Giving up?"
"With trying to live. You look awful."
Solana scoffed and wrapped arms around herself. She moved her gaze back to the window but watched Zayn in the reflection. When he thought she couldn't see him, concern spread over his face.
"I'm fine, just tired today."
Zayn sighed and entered her room. He flopped onto her bed and crossed his arms. "You've been like this for months now. Did you think I didn't notice?"
"What's there to notice?"
"You're so fucking sad. You don't eat, you don't sleep, you don't do anything with anyone. You just sit in your room." Zayn sighed again.
"I can't imagine what it's like living without a mate, but mum... I-" Just like when he was with the therapist, his throat clogged. "I can't watch this any longer. Come down and have lunch with us."
"I don't want to."
"Well I want you to."
Solana's silence was strangely dreadful.
"Mum, please."
"Why? I'll only end up going back to my room. There's nothing for me to do Zayn. I have nothing else to do but sit here and think about him."
Zayn heard the dampness to her voice. He dug his fingernails into his palm when his father's face took over his thoughts. "No, you can come get lunch, then see the therapist."
"No," she scoffed.
"So, you're just going to live like this until you get too weak to carry on? I didn't think you would give up so easily" Solana's silence drilled into the side of Zayn's head. He stormed to the window and made her look at him.
"Mum, didn't you hear me? Look at you... I-" He clenched his jaw. "I'm worried about you."
"You're focusing your worry on the wrong things. I'll be fine if you just let me be."
"No. You didn't give up on me, so I won't give up on you." Their eyes clashed. Sickness made Solana seem much older. "Those months when dad was gone and I didn't have Liam, I had you. Even though you pissed me off every day, I would've been in a horrible state meeting Liam if you didn't help me get out of bed every day. You were so strong then. Why are you giving up now?"
"Because I don't need to be strong for you
anymore. You have Liam and this pack. You're getting there on your own. You don't need me anymore."
Zayn studied her broken face. Her words alarmed him. Solana was very family orientated, but she was giving up on him as well as herself. He couldn't allow that to continue.
"I'm taking you to see the Therapist." He stood and offered her a hand, scowling.
"No."
"Well I'll bring her to you. Don't be so fucking stubborn."
She crossed her thin arms, peering up at him with both annoyance and amusement. "The roles have reversed here."
"No, you were always stubborn, I'm just bettering myself."
"Yes you are," Solana said and the amusement was gone. "Because you have a mate and a pack and a purpose. I have nothing."
"You have me."
"You come into my room to plait my hair every night, that's it. We sometimes speak at dinner, but it's like I'm no longer here." Solana rubbed her dark eyes. "Maybe I should go to Thea's pack for a while just to get out of these walls."
Zayn's scowl weighted with worry. He slowly sat back down on the windowsill. "I still need you."
"How?"
"You're my mum. I'll never stop needing you." His voice was still blunt, but he rested a comforting hand on her frail shoulder. "You need help. Let me give it to you."
Solana looked from his large hand, and into
his big eyes. There was something different about him, something softer.
Finally, she thought. This is my Zayn. She slowly climbed off the windowsill.
"Fine. I'll come to lunch, but I'm not seeing the therapist."
"Yes, you are," Zayn demanded, following her from the room.
"No."
"Yes. I'm the Alpha here."
Solana stabbed him with a cold glare and Zayn's ego took a step back. "Get therapy."
"You get therapy."
"I already am."
Their bantering continued to the canteen. Zayn sat down in a huff as Baela rushed off to get Solana some food and a drink.
Liam looked from one set of angry brown eyes to another.
"Hi Solana," he said to break the silence. Niall was very good at doing that, but he was no longer at the table.
"Hi Liam. It's nice to see you with Zayn again"
"Yeah, we're um-" Liam blushed when he thought about what they did in the shower last night.
"We're working through some things." He held Zayn's hand under the table, knowing that Zayn was still afraid of Liam suddenly changing his mind and taking back the chance he had so generously given him.
"I'm glad you're working through this" Solana said and picked at the pasta salad when Baela returned.
"What are you up to today Solana?" Baela asked.
"Seeing the therapist" Zayn cut in before she could answer.
"Basically everyone is seeing her today. I'm glad. There's no point in making life harder for yourself when help is there if you need it." Baela beamed at Liam who returned the smile.
Solana and Zayn clashed eyes again, and she finally gave him a nod of agreement. He was right, she never usually gave up so easily, but losing a mate was something she battled with day and night, and she was exhausted. Giving up was the easiest thing to do. But as she sat at the table, watching her son talk with his mate and his Beta, he did still need her in ways that changed as he got older.
Losing me might break him, she thought and took another bite of her lunch. But this fight is just so hard.
"Alpha," Baela asked, "I know this is quite a difficult topic right now, but have you thought about who will take the next Delta position?" She grimaced at the thought of Niall's shoes being filled by anyone else. A lot of wolves felt that way when Zayn took over his dad's role.
"I haven't thought about it yet," Zayn said with a mouthful of food.
Liam poked him in his side and Zayn coughed.
"Gross," Liam chuckled when he spat the food onto his plate. Zayn poked him back and Liam almost spilled his drink trying to get away.
Baela decided not to pester him about it. Zayn and Liam were the happiest they had been all week; she didn't want to trample on the mood.
"I'll phone around the packs later to see if they've had any unusual activity in territories." Baela made the call once a week and was yet to have something useful to report back to her Alpha.
Baela had an odd feeling that would soon change.