The day dragged for both Zayn and Liam. As they spent their time on opposite sides of the building, the pack wandered aimlessly between them, not sure what to do, or what to expect for their future. Liam had tried to go to the games room to play board games with Lynx and the rest of the running club but laughing and smiling felt wrong when his soulmate was locked away, lonely and depressed.
Of course, the wolves understood and didn't pester Liam when he curled up in the corner of the room to read his book. Liam wanted to go to his library, but that was too close to Zayn and he wasn't yet ready to speak without getting angry or upset.
The evening felt like an eternity, and Liam soon realised why. He had stayed up later than normal, and only looked up from his book when he noticed the silence. It was 2am, and he was probably the only one awake, apart from Zayn.
The Alpha sat on the couch, staring hopeless around the bedroom that smelt less and less like Liam with each passing hour. Zayn had to get through another lonely night, and he was wondering if he should stay up all night or try to sleep on the couch. He couldn't sleep on the bed again, not by himself.
Liam absence spoke loudly. Zayn expected him to creep back and forgive him, but he had done his best to keep his distance. Zayn was sure Liam would find him after seeing him in the canteen during breakfast, but Liam didn't even get close.
How many more days will he avoid me?
The night crawled on, then the day passed him by, and Zayn found himself alone for a third night. He didn't see Liam yesterday because he was careful not to go where he could smell him. Liam wanted space and Zayn was doing his best to respect that.
"This fucking hurts," he muttered, glaring from his window and clutching his chest. Zayn threw the notepad onto his bed. He tried to write an apology, but his words didn't feel authentic enough. He meant every word, but it was too simple and cold.
"How do I be emotional?" Zayn wrapped arms around himself.
I need Liam.
Every waking moment, he thought about his mate. The longer they were apart, the more desperate they were to be together.
Zayn was hurting, therefore Liam would be hurting too.
"Stubborn little shit," Zayn mumbled, thinking of Liam's brown eyes. "God I love him."
Liam's mental strengths impressed Zayn more each day. Zayn knew he stayed away for so long to show him how mad he was, and how done he was with Zayn's behaviour.
Zayn needed to show his mate how much he was sorry. Storming up to Liam and kissing him senseless was not good enough. Zayn wasn't sure if Liam was waiting for him to approach, or if he was waiting for Liam to approach. Soon, one of them would cave and find the other.
He's stronger than me.
Zayn fell asleep on the windowsill and woke to his shoulder hitting the wooden floor. He groaned and rolled onto his back, staring at the skylight in his ceiling. Clouds stared back. Zayn only had to sniff the air to know who was in his room too.
"Baela," he said with a soft tone. "What are you doing here?"
"To see how you're getting on with the apologies." Baela crossed one leg over the other and linked her fingers with several golden rings. Her dark hair was slicked back into a ponytail exploding with curls.
She wore black jeans, a white vest and a purple denim Jacket with a wolf's head embroidered on the back.
Liam had gotten her patches to sew on for her birthday, so now she had a moon on her left shoulder, and 'No.1 Beta' on the left chest.
"I'll be honest, your words are a bit... blunt." She had spent the past twenty minutes flicking through the notebook full of scribbled.out sentences. Zayn looked so at ease on the windowsill, she didn't want to wake him.
"I know," Zayn sighed, sitting up with a throbbing head. "I'm emotionless. I don't know how to... to..."
"Express your feelings?" Baela had stepped up to be Zayn's friend, not just his Beta. He needed tough love, and after a few days of not seeing him, she hoped Zayn was a bit more eager for help.
"You've always been that way but look how far it's gotten you."
Zayn felt hungover, but he was just heartbroken.
Baela looked him up and down. "You need a shower, then a good breakfast, then I can help with the apologies."
Zayn's eyes finally met hers, like the bark of an oak tree meeting green summer leaves.
"You'd help?"
"Yes, but only if you're willing to really think about this apology. And I mean really think about it. You have to include why you're sorry, what you've done, and what you plan on changing in the future to stop ripping your pack apart." Baela crinkled her nose. "I can't talk more until you've taken a shower. If Liam walked in right now, he'd walk right back out."
Zayn couldn't even bring himself to scowl. All he felt was gratitude for his Beta and his best friend.
"You've always had the courage to speak to me like this. I'm glad."
"You're worth it, Malik."
Zayn smiled weakly, and Baela almost choked on air. If it were any other day, she would have made a fuss. Right now, Zayn was vulnerable and showing his true tragic self.
Baela smiled back as warmly as she could manage and pointed to the bathroom.
*********
"I'm impressed," Lynx said from the grass, stretching an arm above his head. "I haven't seen Zayn in a few days, and nobody has been yelled at for a few days. Do you think he's getting the message?"
"Yes." Liam stretched his legs. He ran harder and faster than ever before and knew his muscles would pay for it later, though it felt good to distract his mind for a little while. Running had always taken the edge off his chipped shoulder.
Zayn usually watched or joined in with the running club. His absence was noticed. Solana came to watch, but her support wasn't quite the same.
"Will you talk to him today?" Lynx asked, pulling off his running shoes.
"I don't know."
"I guess it depends on how much the bond hurts. Is it really painful?"
"Do much that it's hard to think of anything else."
"That's why you thrashed us all today then. I've never seen you run like that." Omega's around Lynx agreed.
"I had a lot to leave on the field."
"We all did." Thinking of Niall was getting easier, but he lingered after every topic.
Liam returned to the bedroom on the second floor, showered, and changed into blue jeans and an oversized yellow hoodie. He rubbed his brown wavy hair with a towel until it stopped dripping around his face. Before tying his yellow converse, he sat on the bed until his headache stopped pounding.
Sleeping without Zayn was so hard, Liam struggled to fall asleep and when he did, he tossed and turned and woke up every hour. Exhaustion took a toll on him. He couldn't last much longer without Zayn, but he expected him to approach first.
"So stubborn," he sighed.
He wanted to find him, instead, he grabbed one of his favourite books and found a cosy spot in the games room on the ground floor. The room was empty, just how Liam liked it. He wasn't yet brave enough to sneak to the library in case he ran into Zayn and had to awkwardly scurry the rest of the way, pretending like he didn't exist. Though he would most likely break down and fall into Zayn's big warm arms.
Liam snuggled into the couch and tried to read. His eyes traced the words, but they didn't register.
All he could think about was Zayn, his werewolf, his boyfriend, his soulmate. Zayn, he sighed in his thoughts. Why do you have to make this so hard for me?
Liam tried to read again. This time he really focused and read two pages before Zayn polluted his thoughts. Liam snapped his book closed in annoyance and rubbed his temples as if that would clear his head.
It didn't.
Soon, Liam could see Zayn's face in his thoughts. He could see everything he missed; his deep alluring brown eyes, the way he ground his defined jaw when Liam would change in front of him, the way he sometimes tilted his head like a dog trying to understand, and the way he sometimes stared with so much adoration Liam would melt into him instantly, and Zayn would hold him tightly, and Liam would feel so safe.
Then Zayn would be cruel and bitter for no reason and sometimes look at Liam like he was wondering why him. Zayn would, only for a moment, forget why Liam was so special to him because pushing everyone away was just too easy.
For Zayn, being kind was effort. It was too much work for someone who was used to being merciless to get what he wanted.
Liam sank further into the couch and held a cushion to his chest as if that would help ease the pain. I could end this by just going to him. Maybe I could tap him on the way past, that would fix the aching for a while.
Liam could only imagine Zayn's face if he gave him a little slap then ran away after ignoring him for a week.
He wanted to smile, and almost did. Liam then realised that he could breathe easier, and his chest swarmed with warmth which only meant one thing.
He looked towards the door, and hazel curious eyes quickly dropped to the floor. Zayn left the doorway in a heartbeat, but Liam found himself scrambling from the couch.
"Wait!" he yelled.
I thought I'll be done with this before Tightrope, but now I don't think so.
Well... we'll see..