The walk was silent. Dain didn't try to comfort either of us. I didn't know what I could even say to Hetta to make her feel better. She walked like she wasn't really all there. She was looking somewhat straight ahead but also down at her feet.
Dain got us out of classes for the rest of the day though..which was appreciated. " So.. I'll let you two shower.. your a little bloody." Dain says once we reached the door. " I can come back later?"
I nod, " Thanks."
He returns my appreciation with his smile I love. Then he looks at Hetta, " Thanks for not stabbing her.. and for stopping Riorson."
She seems to snap out of her trance giving a sad smile, " Ofcourse." She was quick with her words then going to open the door going in our room.
Dain watches for a second before looking back at me, " Why would she do that?"
I can't really tell myself.
Sure I've been nice, and apologized when I made that comment about the marked ones parents..but I haven't been.. saved from stabbing or Riorson's wrath nice. The only thing I could think of besides that was..
The woods that night.
I didn't say anything to anyone about the woods. Or what they were all doing there.But I'm still keeping it and Xaden still cuts me up, Hetta doesn't owe me anything. " Well, I should check on her.. she seems very.."
" Right." Dain says quickly, " See you later."
" Yea, bye."
He walks and I go in the door to see Hetta very carefully unbraiding her hair, her eyes filled with tears, her eyes snap to mine and she wipes her eyes quickly. " You can take a shower first.. I can keep watch just in case-"
" No.. you should.. After what you just did.. I literally owe you my life Hetta."
This seems to break her, tears roll down her face. " Darn it.." She whispers wiping her face, " I don't even know why I'm crying..."
I go closer to where she was standing, " I don't know exactly what history you have with Xaden but know he doesn't deserve you.. debted or not.." I say calmly, " And I'll make sure to watch your back."
She sniffles, " Thank you I appreciate it I really do.. It's just..I'm.."
I've never been one to comfort people, seeing people cry makes me nervous. But I slowly inch closer wrapping her in a hug hoping she doesn't stab me or anything..she doesn't, instead she hugs me back still crying. " He saved me..helped me when our parents were killed..he was there... I literally owe him my life.." She says.
I pull away, " Sure you might've owed him Hetta.. but that doesn't mean he can treat you like.. a sex toy or whatever he does right? Or the way he talked to you..that night.. The way he talked to me about you.. That's not anyone with respect towards you. And I mean he can't hang what he did for you years ago over your head all your life right?"
Her breathing becomes a little more even, I think I feel her nod. I pat her back gently, " I will help you in any way I can ok? I know your not part of the cool kids club anymore but-"
I hear her laugh, even if it was a squaek making me smile. " You've just gained me as a permanent ally."
" Just an ally?" She qustions. I smile, " Fine a friend... I didn't want to scare you off."
She laughs again, " We really stink like blood."
" I know.. shower first.. I insist."
" Thank you." She smiles going in the bathroom. After awhile she gets out and I jump in washing all the red off, scrubbing, still not feeling clean and scrubbing some more. I felt watched as I dried off, something just didn't sit right with me.
Not only do I need to watch myself, now I need to watch Hetta's back. I sigh, it's alomost impressive how much trouble I got myself into, how many people don't like me, and now I'm dragging more it seems into my faults.
What if Xaden tried to kill her? All because she defended me? He would. And now I get dressed a little faster just incase he or someone else decides to pay us a visit. But to my comfort Hetta was on the bed..knitting or doing something with a thin piece of rope or string.
She looks over smiling softly before going back to her thing, " I have a question." I ask. Again she stops what she's doing, " Yes?"
" Did you really mean that? You meant I'm not like my mother?"
Her smile falls a little, she sets down her project. " Yes, I did. Do you... you want to be like her?"
I shake my head, " No.. no. Not like her I suppose. I always did want her approval though."
She tilts her head, " I don't think you need it. I've heard people talk they're impressed with your fighting-"
" -They're scared of my fighting, once you kill someone on those mats your noticed and a threat."
She shakes her head, " I'm not scared. Sure your fighting is..lethal... but you showed me mercy. You were willing to get stabbed. You have compassion, and...that's a good trait to have."
I give a small smile, " I only showed merct because I like you.. You've always been nice to me."
She has a sad smile on her face, " I think you don't give yourself any credit."
I shake my head, " Because I've had nothing to get credited for. I'm not exactly happy I needed to kill him, but i knew it was either going to be me or him coming off that mat. And today... He only did that because your friends with me."
She sighs, " Well, we can't dwell on it now."
For the rest of the day we were pretty silent, after classes ended the rest of the girls came back all quiet after seeing our little ' show' on the mat. Even after a month I still feel like some of these girls are strangers, they're nice enough but we never go out of our way to really make any conversation.
Later that night I decide to do some more ' studying' when I knwo everyone is asleep I pull out Brennan's guide searching through the pages for the section labeled the Gauntlet.
Passage 13 The Gauntlet
Even in your athletic type Mira, I know the Gauntlet will kick your ass..why? Because it kicked mine and I always could beat you... That deathtrap of a course is meant to kill you. Kill the ones teetering on the edge of just surviving challenges and here in general.
It's meant to test your physical state, your balance, strength and quickness. There's ropes just in case you need help or lose balance, grab them when you need to.
They also drill in your head times matter...they don't. As long as you make it to to the top that's all that matters, it's just another way to weed more and more of you out.
Use that brilliant brain...and those man hands...those will come in handy..
Don't die.
-Brennan