Zayn loved the mud in his claws and the earthy smells. He loved letting his tongue free when he ran, and he enjoyed pressing his nose to the ground as he moved, picking up the many different smells. Zayn then stopped and looked at the trees looming above the fence. He longed to go further and run harder routes and smell different animals and different trees. Zayn longed for freedom.
Then it hit him.
He really was living his life in fear and so was every other pack in the north. Zayn wouldn't leave his Packhouse because he feared the Southern Alpha would be close and watching and ready to pounce.
Zayn feared for Liam and his mother and his friends and his pack. His entire existence was fear.
Well shit, Zayn thought, digging black claws into the dirt. He whined lowly and faced the Packhouse.
Liam sat in the distance with a book. Zayn had taken him from one trap and placed him in another. He didn't want that life for Liam. He wanted to explore with him, let him meet other packs and experience what it was really like to be in a werewolf's world.
Hiding wasn't normal for wolves, but Zayn was paranoid, just like his father. Why was he so paranoid? I need to find that journal.
Zayn bounced his way back to Liam. He was going to shift and drag Liam to the office, but Liam was sitting so peacefully on the grass, and he was so lost in his book that he hadn't notice Zayn standing next to him. So Zayn laid down and nuzzled his head into Liam's thigh.
Zayn soon felt Liam's fingers in his fur and smoothing over his ears absentmindedly. Zayn enjoyed the motion, and he soon closed his eyes to focus further on his mate's touch.
Liam glanced from his book when Zayn started falling asleep. Liam felt it, somehow. When Zayn was asleep it was like a part of him went to sleep too. Liam moved around and nestled into Zayn. The wolf lay on his side, and Liam rested his back on Zayn's side.
His mate didn't even stir.
Zayn sometimes slept through the night in his wolf form. On cold winter nights, Liam preferred to hug a warm wolf.
Liam had read almost one hundred pages of his book before Zayn stretched his four legs. He lifted his head wearily and yawned. A sweet and short howl escaped. Zayn's red eyes faced Liam who smiled.
"Nice nap?" Liam asked, rubbing Zayn's head enthusiastically.
Zayn nodded and sat up. He was taller than Liam when Liam was sitting too. Zayn sat proudly as Liam rubbed the fur around his neck. Zayn tried to lick Liam's face, but his mate wasn't fond and always dodged him.
"Shall we look for the journal?" Liam asked.
He laid back on the grass and watched Zayn shift. The more times he watched, the less the sound of bones cracking made his stomach flip. Liam was fascinated by how it happened, though he hated seeing Zayn grimace from the unbearable pain.
Still, Liam watched as Zayn's grey jumper and black jeans returned. His paws turned to shoes and hands and his fur turned to skin. His features that Liam adored returned, including his brown eyes, defined jaw, the silver tuft of hair among the black, the little scar across the bridge of his nose, and his lips that shaped his hostility or amusement or occasionally genuine happiness.
"Hi," Liam smiled. He loved the way Zayn's eyes changed when they looked at him like they were filling to the brim with adoration.
"Hi" Zayn kissed his forehead, then laid next to him on the grass. They stared at the blue sky and the few fluffy white clouds floating by.
"I guess we should go and look for the journal" Zayn was enjoying lying in the sun. He didn't want to disturb the nice afternoon by stressing more.
"I guess we should," Liam sighed. "I just wish we could chill like this all the time."
"It will be like this when we find and kill the southern Alpha."
They looked at each other, both with a gleam of doubt and determination.
"Come on." Zayn got to his feet and pulled Liam up too.
They carried their eagerness to Zayn's office. It took them almost an hour to search the room from top to bottom. Liam removed the broken wooden lamp from the windowsill to stop Zayn from knocking it off again and breaking it for good. Only one side had cracked and bent. Liam would have to remind Zayn to get it fixed, otherwise, it would never work again.
When they tidied the office, they checked Jaiden's belongings again and didn't find anything journal-ike.
"What now?" Zayn asked, throwing Jaiden's things in the corner of the basement. He had to hire a skip. The basements were getting out of control.
"Ask your mum?" Liam suggested. So they did.
They found Solana after dinner where they always found her, in her bed reading a book.
"No" Solana said, peering over her reading glasses. "I knew he wrote journals, but I couldn't bring myself to look at them, let alone read them after.." Solana cleared her throat. The sorrow captured her fast.
"So, you've got them all apart from last year's
Journal?" Zayn nodded.
"I bet Jaiden took it. I bet the Southern Alpha has it. Fuck." Zayn folded arms and rooted his feet to the carpet to stop himself from pacing. He felt the tightness around his shoulders where the jumper hugged him.
Solana looked glum. "Your father was always a step ahead of everyone else. It surprised me more than anything that Jordan and the Bedlam Alpha got the better of him like that!"
"It surprised us all. They played us and we're still watching our backs nearly two years later." Zayn ground his jaw. "This has to stop."
"l agree, but how do we stop it if we don't even know where the Southern Alpha is?"
"Um, c-can I suggest something?" Liam asked.
They both looked at him with their eyes of fury.
"Um, you might not like this, but you know how human authorities get you to help out with their problems, maybe get them to help with this one?"
Zayn scoffed first. "No Liam."
"Why not?"
"They are humans, that's why. They're useless at pretty much everything they do. They'll make it worse for us." Zayn spoke before thinking.
"Humans are not useless at everything" Liam replied in a firmer tone than what he was used to using. "I wish you would stop with that."
"Well it's true," Zayn muttered, too proud to admit his mistake.
"Am I useless at everything then?"
"Not you, but-"
"But what?"
Zayn heard the bitterness in Liam's tone which was usually a warning for him to shut his mouth. However, Zayn was feeling a little keen to snap back.
"But the human race is weak, and we should have killed them all when we had the chance."
Liam shook his head with disappointment. "I know you don't think that. You've just said that to upset me." Liam left him to be devoured by his angry mother and stormed to the bedroom. Liam sat at the end of the bed and waited. They didn't fight often.
They couldn't be too annoyed with each other because of the bond. But sometimes, the old Zayn would return, the self-destructive Zayn, the selfish Zayn, the Zayn who pushed everyone away.
Liam sat up straighter when he heard his mate's heavy plods. Zayn stepped into the room, glaring.
He slammed the door behind him and muttered, "Sorry."
"What for?"
"'m just sorry, alright."
"But for what?!"
"You know what I'm sorry for, why do I have to explain it?"
"Because I want you to know what you're sorry for."
"Accept my apology or don't." Zayn had raised his voice, so murmured, "I don't fucking care."
Liam sighed. "You're so annoying."
"You're so annoying." Zayn glared at the floor.
"At least I don't shit all over the werewolf race out of spite."
Zayn didn't hear Liam swear often, but it always made him want to stop what he was doing and fuss over how cute it sounded.
"Shut up." he said instead.
"No, you shut up." Liam stood and crossed his arms.
"No, you." Zayn eyed him, quickly realising how childish he sounded.
"No, you." Liam had realised too and tightened his lips to hide his amusement.
"Stupid.. short human."
"Stupid... dog" Liam slapped a hand over his mouth. "Sorry."
Zayn pretended to be really offended. He stalked closer, darkening his eyes with enjoyment. "What are you sorry for?"
Liam sighed. "You go first."
Zayn could no longer hide his entertainment. He dove for Liam and spun him around, then fell backwards on the bed.
Liam landed on his chest with a smile. He quickly cupped Zayn's chin. "You really are so infuriating"
"I know" Zayn smirked. Locking hands behind Liam's back to keep them together. "I'm not sorry about it, but I am sorry for not thinking before I spoke, and I'm sorry for making you sad on purpose, that was shitty of me."
"Apology accepted. I'm sorry for calling you a dog."
"I deserved it." Zayn tapped Liam's nose. "If
that was a year ago, I would have stomped around the fence for hours and snuck in at 3 am just to avoid talking to you.!"
"Instead, we yell at each other until one of us finds it funny."
"Yes." Zayn smiled, not cheekily, but kindly. His eyes melted and crinkled at the sides, and his brows relaxed. "Progress."
Liam loved his gentle smile and how different it was from his usual scowl. But now, it was Liam's turn to look serious. He studied Zayn's soft face, not wanting to dampen the mood, but feeling like the conversation would always move to his parents until they knew more.
"Do you think we'll ever really know what happened that night?" he asked.
"I don't know. My dad always said that truths had weird ways of exposing themselves."
"I believe him."
Zayn stroked the back of his thumb down Liam's cheek to brighten his concerned eyes. "I think I believe him too."
story time- Around 2 weeks ago my brother, my neighbour and I were at my room and we were quite literally blasting what my brother calls "my depression and desperation playlist" which basically consists of pop, party and other genres which he listens to when he gets depressed or feels lonely and we three were singing out hearts, lungs, kidneys, intestine, oesophagus out why? Cause we can.
Just as Unholy was playing my neighbour's younger cousin who is 5 years old decides to join us and goes "Why is daddy getting hot at a bodyshop? Don't they have AC?"
Us three *silence* *awkward silence* *crickets- no birds chirping outside silence* *you can hear our heartbeat and heavy breathing silence*