"Ma'am Mr. Lee is here to see you" My Secretary said as she got inside.
"Let him in" I responded.
After a while Mr. Lee walked in. He has a folder in his hand. He dropped the folder on my desk and sat down.
"Mr. Lee, what brings you here?" I asked while using my computer.
"We have gathered all the necessary information about Mr. Armstrong. It is contained in the folder." He said and I stopped what I was doing immediately.
"I appreciate all your efforts so far Mr. Lee but I won't be needing that anymore" I said and he looked at me in surprise.
"I want all investigation regarding Mr. Armstrong closed" I continued.
"Ma'am are you sure about...." He stuttered confusedly.
"Do I look like I am joking?" I asked sternly and he was mute.
Silence
I picked up my phone and made some transactions before looking back at him.
"I have just transferred some money to you as my way of Thanking you for everything."
"Thanks a lot ma'am"
Silence
"If that's all, please excuse me. I have something to finish before the deadline" I said and he stood up to go.
"You can take this with you. I have no use for them any longer" I said pushing the folder back to him.
He reluctantly took the folder, bowed and left my office. I let out a sigh and went back to what I was doing. That family is the last thing I want to hear about. I don't care a bit about them anymore. I have decided to block them out of my life.
It's almost a month since my break up with Becky. I won't lie, it still hurts. It still hurts a lot but I have decided to let go of everything. She grinded my heart to dust. I don't want to see her, I don't want to talk to her or hear anything related to her ever again.
I just want to move on with my life and be around people that truly love and care about me. People that will never leave me no matter how difficult the situation gets. I don't need their promises to trust that they will always be by my side. I don't need fake promises!!
I clenched my fist so hard when the thought of what happened that night came to my mind. If she was going to break up with me why did she organize a romantic date? I can't believe she told me the movie wasn't about us. 'it is just a movie baby' , using her words precisely. When it was exactly what she planned to do to me.
"Liar" I muttered furiously.
I tried to snap out of my mood and concentrate but I couldn't. Thanks to Mr. Lee, I can't do anything anymore. Staying here won't do any good so I decided to go home. I picked my things to leave the office when my phone started ringing. I let out a sigh and sat back on the chair to take that.
"How is your wedding preparation going?" I asked Irin over the phone and she chuckled.
"Going smoothly thank you" she responded.
"Uhm. actually, that's why I called." She said.
Irin's wedding is in the coming week. Everybody around me is married while some are getting married. Nam had her wedding some weeks ago and Irin is having hers soon.
"Freen I heard what happened from Nop and that's why I decided to talk to you first about my plan" Irin said bringing my mind back.
"What happened?" I asked confusedly.
"Between you and Becky" she responded.
I rolled my eyes in disbelief. Why is everybody talking about them? They are not important to me and I don't care anymore.
"Becky and I are over. I would appreciate it if you don't talk about her no more." I said trying to be as calm as possible.
Silence
"So what is the plan you want to talk to me about?" I asked breaking the silence.
"I am so sorry over what I want to say right now. But you see, Becky was my good friend and I still consider her a friend. As a result, I want to invite her ...."
"To your wedding?" I asked cutting her off.
She got silent. Being quiet only means yes. But what does she need my permission for? It's her wedding, she can invite whoever she wishes to. I waited for some seconds for her reply but she was still silent.
"The silence means yes I guess" I said breaking the silence.
"Please understand..."
"Irin, it is your wedding. You have the right to invite whoever you want to invite. Why are you taking permission from me to invite a guest?" I said.
"I was a little skeptical over my decision because of how you will feel. I don't want you to get hurt..."
"Becky made her choice and I have accepted that. Please do whatever that will make you happy on your wedding day." I said calmly.
"Thank you so much for being so open minded" she said. After talking with her, she ended the call.
Irin wants to invite Becky to her wedding? I never thought I would see her again after that night. I have deleted everything about her out of my life. And have cleared my rooms of anything that reminds me of her. Not even a single picture of her was left unburnt.
I snapped out of my thoughts and got out of the office. My secretary wasn't surprised to see that I have closed for the day that early. I have been like this ever since the break up. I go home anytime I feel uncomfortable in my office.
The memory of Becky in my office isn't making it easier for me. I have requested for a change of look and my office would be redecorated by weekend. I can handle my apartment being the same but not my office since it's affecting my work.
I drove straight to a supermarket to shop for the things I needed in the house. Everything here reminds me of the day I went shopping with Becky. It was the first day I confessed my love for her. How can I go back to that day? I would have chosen differently. I would have tried to kill whatever I felt for her instead of confessing.
I was in my thoughts, moving from rack to rack when I bumped into someone and her basket fell.
"I am so sorry" I apologized as I stooped down to help with the items on the floor.
"It's nothing." She responded.
"Is everything okay?" A worker asked as he approached us.
"Yes. Everything is totally fine". She responded.
I picked up the last item and handed it over to her. She smiled broadly and put it back in the basket.
"I am really sorry...." I tried apologizing again.
"Don't be. Things like this happen all the time" she said.
I smiled and walked to the counter to pay. After which I drove home. How did I not see that woman? I am becoming clumsy all of a sudden and that's because I am always lost in my thoughts.
..............................................
I walked into the supermarket with Jane. We came to shop for the things we needed in the house and for the wedding. It's been almost a month since my break up with Freen. Nothing is going well. Everything sucks. My heart bleeds every damn minute. I want to see her. I badly want to see her again but I can't. I can't attract my dad's attention to them anymore. Heldi told me they have literally stopped stalking her at the moment.
My wedding with Jane is in a month time and I seriously don't know how that makes me feel. I don't hate marriage, I only hate this one because I am being forced into it.
Jane carried the cart as she followed behind me. It feels like I have been in this situation before. Like I was shopping and someone was pushing the shopping cart. Maybe Freen and I have had similar experience.
We were almost done with our shopping when I heard a sound that startled me from the other aisle. I think someone dropped their basket or something. I heaved a sigh and continued with my shopping. But my attention was brought back when a worker approached them.
"Is everything okay?" He asked.
"Yes. Everything is totally fine". A lady's voice spoke.
She's probably the one that dropped her basket. Jane instantly walked to me with two items. She wanted to know which one is better. I know it's a way of starting a conversation with me. I hate when she does that. Why does she try so much to get me into talking to her? I ignored her and continued with what I was doing.
Some minutes later, we were done with our shopping. We went home immediately and as if she had been waiting for us to get home, Jane started ranting over why I kept ignoring her in the supermarket. I have decided not to argue with her for any reason anymore. It's a waste of time.
I started walking upstairs to my room and she followed me.
"You know you won't continue like this forever. Giving me a silent treatment won't help matters at all." She said.
Silence.
"You really need to stop this behavior of yours. I will be your wife in a month time, the earlier you accept that, the better for the both of us. You can't continue being moody forever....." she continued.
I got into my room and slammed the door in her face. I can hear her cursing out loud from outside. I know I hurt her by my actions but I am equally hurt. I am hurt over why she can't accept the fact that I don't love her. I am not happy getting married to her.
I fell on my bed as the thought of Freen occupied my mind. My tears started flowing slowly. I miss her a lot. I miss her so much. My heart bleeds anytime I think of the pain I put her through. I literally saw the pain in her eyes that night. It hurts me so much that I broke her heart this way. Will she ever forgive me?
My phone started ringing bringing my mind back. It's an unsaved number. Maybe one of the contractors we hired to set up our branch here. I answered it. My eyes widened when she introduced herself and I quickly sat up from the bed.
"Irin?" I asked to be sure and she said yes.
Why is Irin calling me? This is actually the first time Freen's friend or family has ever called me on the phone.
"Uhm Becky. It's my wedding next weekend and I wish to invite you to my wedding" she said.
"Uhm..." I stuttered.
"I want you there Becky. I will be glad if you come" she said.
She's inviting me to her wedding? Not that it's bad but considering that I broke up with Freen..
"Irin..."
"I know what happened between you and Freen. But trust me, it's about me not her. The old Becky would never miss my day for anything. I still see you as the old Becky and that's why I want to share my joy with you." She said.
That made me smile from ear to ear. Freen told me I was friends with Nop and Irin before my accident. I don't remember them but I felt some connections when I met them at Nop's anniversary. I missed Nop's wedding, I'm never gonna miss Irin's.
"Thanks for considering me as part of your great function. I will be there for sure" I responded and she screamed excitedly.
"It's been a while Becky. I wish you can remember me so we can go back to how we used to be" she said out of nowhere and that got me emotional.
She has no idea how much I want my memories back. No one wants them back as much as I do. I am so confused of my environment. I feel like a stranger in this world and I don't know what to do with my life all because of my memory loss.
When I met Freen, I was beginning to live. A happy life. I was managing my confusion and I felt safe and protected. But my family took away my happiness and I am back to the sad, lonely, confused and broken human ever lived.
"How is Freen?" I asked trying to hold back my tears.
"She's uhm..." She tried to speak but I cut her off.
"Gosh, I am so sorry. I shouldn't have asked such an insensitive question...."
"Hey. It's fine. It's alright. I don't want you to beat yourself too hard. Okay? You did what you had to do. You did what you felt was right. So don't blame yourself. Don't hate yourself" she said.
That pushed tears from my eyes. I have never received such heartwarming words from anyone ever since the break up happened. The only person that could have said such was my mum but because I shut everyone off, I haven't been in contact with her since then.
"Don't worry so much about Freen. She can handle herself. She's stronger than you think" she said and I smiled.
I am smiling but my tears are falling. I thanked her for the kind words and assured her I would make it to her wedding before ending the call.
This is the right opportunity to see Freen once again. Just seeing her beautiful face is enough for me. I want to see her beautiful eyes even if it's from a distance because I have missed her so much.
To be continued ............................