May 7th
Beyoncé
10:28
"How is she doing?" I said into my phone talking to Shawn I haven't heard from Amariana since she left last night and I honestly don't blame her I said some shit that I wish I didn't.
"Why don't you call and ask her yourself, we don't know what's going on on her inside bey," he spoke I sighed
"I know but she won't call me she's upset with me" I said sadly
"Well I can only say she seems a little fine I guess. she sleep right now but bey I think you should talk to her" it got quiet and I flashed back to her first getting here
"I just hope she doesn't hate me again" I laid my head back against the headboard closing my eyes sighning
"Bey she doesn't hate you she never did don't think otherwise"
"I hope so"
"Listen he sighed how about you come by today to talk to her I'll ease her up a bit when she wakes up before you get here"
"Yeah ok thank you" i Ruben day temple
"No problem, hey bey?"
"Yeah?"
"I just want you to know I love you" i softly smiled at his words and noded as if he could see me
"I know" I spoke softly it got silent like we both felt the same feeling causing us to be quiet
"Listen" I broke the silent "I'm gonna get ready and I'll be there with blue. He had been staying at our honeymoon condo we bought out my the beach.
"Yeah ok I'm sure she'll be up I'm gonna start cooking for her to eat that'll help ease her up" he chuckled causing me to laugh
"Ok bye" I claimed my laughter
"Bye"we hung up and I dropped my phone as well as my arm taking a deep breath froze in my movements
"I hope this goes as plan" I said getting out of bed
Shawn
10:34
"Hey sleepy head" i exclaimed as Amariana walked down stairs rubbing her eyes
"What time is it?" She sat down at the island watching me flip her pancake
"10:37 you slept in today"
"Yeah it was needed"
"Mmh,well your mother is coming by to-" I began before her gasped and wide eyes cut me off
"What, why?" She semi yelled and I chuckled at her dramatics
"To talk to you about what happened" she groaned and sunk in her seat
"I'm not ready to talk to her" she mumbled I huffed and sat down put her pancake and eggs on her plate
"Lefty she just wants to apologize she didn't mean any of it she was just scared trust me I know a acted Beyoncé" I shook my head at the memories of Amariana being gone.
"I'm not upset about what she said I'm upset at myself for letting it happen and she just happened to make it clear it was my fault which it is" she said sadly
"And that's why she wants to apologize she didn't mean to make you feel worse than you already have" I handed her, her plate.
"Thanks, and I don't know she just been off since ya know you left" she took a bite into her pancake i bit my lip nervously forgetting about that and now I have to face bey today
"Yeah I know"
"Maybe you should talk to her when she comes maybe this isn't just for me and her" she shrugged picking at her eggs
"Yeah maybe" I whispered "look I'm gonna go get ready before she gets here alright" she nodded her head stuffing her face I chuckled and walked around the island kissing her head before making my way upstairs. I went into my closet to change my clothes. In the middle of me changing my shirt my phone dinged I went to pick it up seeing it was Becky I blew out a breathe and through my phone on my bed not bothering to answer after I was done with my business and freshening up I went back down stairs.
"So after your mom comes by what do you want to do today?" I asked Amariana as she was putting her dish away
"Umm I don't know" she shrugged "what do you usually do since your here alone?"
"Well I go tot he gym I hand with a few of my boys" I followed her into the living room as we both plopped down
"I don't know really I haven't been in the mood for fun or yo be around people"
"Girl your a teenager you don't like to have fun?" I chuckled shaking my head
"I mean I do don't get me wrong it's just", she paused in her sentence sighing. "I don't know" she finally spoke again i noded my head looking ahead we went silent for a moment before I turned my head back to face her
"I know what your thinking lefty" she turned her head looking back at me
"Yeah and what is that?" She crossed her arms pursing her lips
"She's not mad at you do you think she would be on her way to talk to you?"
"I don't know I just feel like there's something there saying don't build a relationship every time we try" she shook her head
"Well whatever that voice is or thought push it to the back because like it or not you have to have a relationship she's your mother"
"I know" she whispered we sat watching tv for a while in silent
"So why do you guys have a condo out here?" She asked breaking the silence
"Well" I dragged out trying to think correctly "we got it after we got married it was out honey moon condo actually" I sat up before continuing facing her some
"We couldn't fully have our honeymoon for the week we were supposed to have because we had performances so we bought a honey moon condo to continue our honeymoon after we finished the performances" i stories out she smiled and I smiled back until her smiled faded. I looked in her face seeing her cheeks turn a shade of pink she sniffled pointing the tip of her nose clearing her throat
"Can I ask you something?". Oh god please don't
"Y-yeah" i stuttered I knew what this was soons I brought up our marriage
"Why did you do it, she paused before looking at me "why did you cheat on my mama?" I wanted to smile at the last part but this want the moment to do so
"I,um" i cleared my throat. "I honestly don't know lefty I really don't". Now back thinking I was just a horny fuck and Becky made it no better
"Do you not love her?" My eyes widened and I snapped my head to look at her
"Of course I love her" I said final before speaking again. "I love her I love you I love your sister you three are my everything my world and I love you all without a doubt but some how I let my actions take over and question my love" she nodded her head fiddling with her fingers
"Daddy?"
"Yeah?"
"Do you think she'll forgive you and we can all be back together?" I sighed biting my the inner corner of my lip
"I honestly don't know, but I'm willing to do everything in my power for it to happen from me getting your mama back to me being a back home" I looked away thinking about what would happen if I didn't come back
"Because I can't lose y'all especially you again" I nudge her shoulder trying to lighten the mood she smiled softly and look down
"And I owe you an apology" I spoke she snapped her head up scrunching her face
"Why?" She made a face
"Because I put you I the middle of it you didn't deserve to see what was happening and I apologize for making you lie" I said sincerely she nodded her head and looked back at the tv I smiled sitting back looking back at it myself.
Beyoncé
11:00
I pulled in the driveway of our condo parking and turning the car off I sat for a moment thinking neck of the memories we had in this condo. After me and Jay got married we spent half of our honey moon here I found out I was pregnant here we had so many happy memories in this condo we couldn't help but buy and own it.
"Mommy why are we here?" I heard blue asked form the backseat
"We here to see daddy and sissy" I said unbuckling myself getting out before I went to the back to get her out.
"Are they coming back with us?" I grab her for her booster seat placing her on my hip shutting the door
"I don't know right now baby that's why I'm here to talk to them" I didn't want to inform her about me and Shawn too much but honestly I didn't know about Amariana coming back. I walked to the door ringing the door bell holding blue on my hip. I heard feet approaching and the locks being turned before the door opened revealing Shawn
"Hi" he smiled weakly moving to the side letting me walk in
"Hey" I spoke
"How you been?" I opened my mouth to answer with my eyebrows raised before quickly closing my mouth not knowing what to say giving a well look
"Just think of me when Amariana was gone" i remarked at my days of trauma his face soften and we walked closer to me
"Bey i don't want you to feel like that I'm sorry"
"It's ok, I'm handling it and getting myself together" i let out breathe he noded and looked at blue
"Hi princess" he rubbed her cheek
"Hi daddy" she smiled
"Where's Amariana?" He looked at me then behind me sucking his teeth
"Lefty come here" i turned around and she was creeping up the stairs she froze and slowly turned around with a innocent smile looking between us. She dropped her shoulders standin up straight hugging walking over to us
"Well hello to you too" I chuckled
"Hi Beyoncé" my smile sorta fell at the full name again. I knew I had to make this right and there is no hesitation or excuse on why I can't
"Hey blue baby how about you spend some time with daddy so I can talk to sissy yeah?" I bounces to to reassure everything was ok she noded and reached for Shawn and he took her carrying her out back I waited for them to be out of sight before looking back at my oldest who looked terrified
"Amariana baby,can we sit?" She just looked down fiddling with her fingers before nodding I began to walk but she didn't I walked back slowly reaching my palms out
"Can I carry you?" She noded again and parted her hands away from each lifting her arms slightly for me to grab her which I did she light..... to light. I sat down with her next to me
"Listen I'm sorry mini, I'm so sorry for what I said and how I reacted" I paused collecting myself before speaking again. I just got scared so scared, I never mentioned this before but you being kidnapped kinda messed over me. Is she ok, is she dead, is she bleeding right now,is she crying and if so what's wrong?" I explained
"So when I saw the blood it kinda scared me" she still didn't budge to look at me but I knew she was listening
"I understand if I ruin everything and you hate me again but I felt you deserved to at least know why i panicked and I owed you a apology" she stop her fingers and looked up at me
"I don't hate you Beybey. I was just shocked you scared me and you Blamed me like I'm a bad person or a murderer" she expressed I ran my hands over my temple feeling ashamed I looked back at her and seeing tears form in her eyes
"Baby I'm so sorry I made you feel that way I just- I been through a lot a lot in the pass and a lot now" she noded her head wiping away her teary eyes
"I forgive you" she said softy I smiled and pulled her into my arms putting on hand in the back of her head and the other on her back as she laid her head in my chest I closed my eyes and let out a sharp breathe that was building in my chest I let it out putting my head against hers
"Are you willing to come home?" I felt her body tense up and she pulled away from me wiping her face
"Umm" she slapped her hand against her thigh gently "not right now and it's not because of you" she reassured i nodded slowly
"It's just I think we both need time we let our feelings take over us and then we release them on each other it not do gods ways" she was right I can't say she wasn't we have a relationship building and a good bond but that doesn't mean we don't fight and let our frustration out on each other Amariana is the sweetest teenager I've met actually but when she gets upset well we all know what was being said when she first got here...
"And your completely right and I understand but can you just at least call me?" I hesitated she smiled and chuckled
"Yeah I will" i sniffled and noded "well I guess I better get your sister" is good up pulling her up with me giving her a hug we still haven't made it to a chest to chest hug but I still get to hold her willingly
"Thank you for letting me get this out and not pushing me away" I whispered into her hair
"It was needed" i smiled pulling away I bent done and softly kissed her nose causing her to scrunch her face and laugh lightly as I did as well.
Shawn
11:10
I was sitting outside with blue playing with chalk waiting for bey and Amariana to finish. I was nervous to talk to bey about everything that's been happening. Is she gone leave me? Is she gonna move forward with me? Is she gonna leave things the way they are? With those thoughts and sharp feeling of nervousness hit my chest.
"Hey" I heard breaking me out of my thoughts i shot my head up seeing bey sitting next to me
"Hey" I said trying to sound certain and calm when really I wanted to throw up. "How did it go?"
"Not bad could've been worse" she laughed lightly and I chuckled. We went silent looking at blue as she played. I knew this was my time I put the chalk down and rubbed my hands together to get the dust off
"Listen bey-" i started
"I know" she silenced me I looked at her only getting to see half of her face since she was still looking ahead. "I know you love me and you sorry" she informed. I nodded because she was right but i didn't want her to feel like it was just a weak saying I say to her
"Your right bey I do love you and I'm deeply sorry but I want you to feel it to know I mean what I say" i paused because I knew what needed to happen to prove my love and apologies I closed my mouth and let kid a deep sharp breath through my nose before giving her my all attention
"I'm willing to tell you the truth if you let me" shot her head up hitting the inside of her lip
"I can handle hearing the truth, but can you handle telling it?" Honestly I didn't even think I could because it would only kill me deeply telling how I cheated on the love of my life but if this was the beginning of progress than what left do I have to give
"I can" she slowly nodded and turned her head finally letting me see her face .
"Umm" I began "well she started as temp I'm sure you know and" I sighed "I'm not gonna lie she was beautiful but I knew it was nothing more than work and that what we did work until she started to let lose on me" i soused thinking about the things she did feeling ashamed I cleared my throat carrying on.
Until we were in the studio alone and things got carried away she began to become seductive, her voice, her walk and I fell into it, but I stop her and told her I have a wife and daughter im deeply in love with" I reassured her
"But that didn't stop her and things got ya know-wild I guess" she noded her head weekly wiping her eyes I wanted to hold her so bad but I knew i couldn't. She lowly gasped and raise her brows with widen eyes
"Wait" she broke into thought. "The day at the studio when you said you had a meeting and it was me and the girls when I took them to get ice cream?" Oh shit. I nodded my head and she looked away trying to figure it all out
"She was there wasn't she?" I rubbed my hand across my face frustratedly
"Bey"
"Wasn't she" she hissed I nodded hesitantly
"She was" I informed she scoffed and chuckled bitterly
"Your pathetic" she gritted standing up "blue baby time to go" she yelled out to blue
"Bey I didn't want to tell you because I knew Amariana was gonna have that talk with you and I didn't want to ruin it" I followed her inside with blue on her hip. Amariana was the couch watching tv before she looked between us
"So you hide it from me my child sees it you make her hide it then it goes to the internet and my sisters and mama had to tell me. do you know how embarrassing that was you have me looking stupid Shawn" she semi yelled
"I know bey and I'm sorry but you said you wanted the truth" she shook her head
"I've heard enough" she walked over to Amariana and kissed her cheek " I'll call you tonight" she walked to the door and I followed
"Bey wait" she stopped and turned around rubbing her head
"What Shawn?" She asked In annoyance
"We-were does this leave us?" She looked down some and hit the inside of her lip as her face turned a light pink her eyes began to water and turn red,she formed a sad cry and shook her head she sniffed and looked me in my eyes
"I think we should file for divorce"
Damn Shawn
Thoughts
Amariana and Beyoncé?
Amariana not coming home?
Beyoncé wanting to file for divorce?
Actions in the next chapter coming it's time to get active🫣