It was a lovely afternoon at Castle Dedede. The king was about to watch his afternoon shows, but when he turned on the television, he saw Meta Knight pointing at him. He jumped back, hearing the Star Warrior's voice.
"Lazy, pathetic monarch..."
When he looked back up, he was gone, replaced with a guffawing cartoon character. Dedede calmly got back in his throne and relaxed. After a quick sigh, he decided to open a bag of chips and saw Meta Knight pointing at him.
"Lazy, pathetic monarch..."
The king threw the bag on the ground and hit it with his hammer, crushing all of the chips inside. Afterwards, he decided to sit back down and try to enjoy his show.
What's wrong, Your Majesty?
"I think what Meta Knight said is getting to me," Dedede groaned, "About me being lazy and pathetic..." He paused, seemingly waiting for something, "Aren't you gonna tell me that he's wrong?"
Well, you do usually rely on Dark Matter to fight your battles...
King Dedede took a breath, Zero made a valid point. He had been relying on dark powers not just to fight Kirby, but also some general help around the castle and kingdom.
I think that you should just ignore him.
As he tried to relax, the door opened and Escargoon slithered in. Dedede sighed, as he didn't see Meta Knight this time. It seemed as if the advice was working, until he saw Meta Knight pointing at him from behind the door.
"Lazy, pathetic monarch..."
He jumped a bit, and when he blinked, he saw that it was just Bandana Dee, who was waving at him. After stuttering a bit, his face turned red with anger and embarrassment. Escargoon and Bandana Dee looked at him, concerned.
"Sire?" The advisor cautiously asked, "Are you feeling alright-"
Dedede slammed his hands on his throne and shouted, "I gotta prove to that Meta Knight that I am not lazy, pathetic, or a monarch- wait..." He rested his head on his hand, "Ignore that last one!"
"Meta Knight?" Bandana Dee was very alarmed, "He's back?"
"Yeah!" The king ranted, still annoyed, "And he's helping you guys train Kirbeh today-"
At that point, Dedede got an idea and began to grin.
This won't end well...
=====
*Theme Song Plays*
=====
Meta Knight flew through the air, feeling the wind beneath his bat-like wings. He was excited to help train Kirby. One thing that he wasn't excited about was working with the Royal Guard, which meant working with the traitor, Blade Knight. The thought made the knight groan in disbelief and disgust, but it was a small price to pay for redemption.
As he landed at Kirby's door, the knight cleared his throat. After no response, he began to knock. And then, still not getting a response, he kicked the door down to see Kirby sleeping. This infuriated him, so he shook his pupil awake.
"Kirby!" He said, "How are you supposed to protect the town when you sleep this late?"
Kirby was confused and looked at his clock. It was five in the morning. The only time he'd been up this early was when Tiff took him to Kabu. And he didn't enjoy that. As if that wasn't enough, a lantern turned on next to the fireplace, revealing Bandana Dee, sitting in a chair nearby.
"I had a feeling you would do this..." The Waddle Dee groaned, as Kirby and Meta Knight wondered how long he'd been standing there, "Let the kid sleep, that's lesson number one for you. Come on, MK. Let's go figure out a lesson plan..."
As they walked out and Kirby went to sleep, Meta Knight groaned, "Don't call me MK..."
=====
Four hours later, the three of them were walking through Waddle Dee Town, heading toward Whispy Woods. Everyone who looked at them was on edge, and Meta Knight felt that most of it wasn't because of him. He remembered what Tiff had mentioned about people starting to warm up to him, but something in his gut told him that there was more to it than what she said.
His thoughts were interrupted by the sound of tires screeching. Looking backwards, he saw some sort of vehicle barreling towards them. Instinct kicked in and he shot a Sword Beam at a tire, stopping the vehicle in its tracks, and causing King Dedede and Escargoon to fall out.
Meta Knight was disappointed as he sheathed his blade, "Oh, it's you," he said, flatly, "To what do I owe the pleasure?"
"Meta Knight!" The king said, dusting himself off, "I challenge you to a duel!"
"A duel?" Nobody could tell, but Meta Knight had an eyebrow raised.
What?
"A duel at the Deluxe Dedede Arena, located underneath the castle!" Escargoon explained, "His Majesty doesn't hold a fight there very often, you should consider yourself lucky!"
"Just the two of us, Mano a Mano, to prove each other's strength!" The king elaborated, drawing the attention of many nearby witnesses. It baffled Meta Knight why he was doing this, but then it clicked and he burst out laughing.
"So because I called you lazy, you challenge me to a duel?" Meta Knight laughed harder, pointing at the king. He looked at Bandana Dee and Kirby, "Come on, guys! Laugh with me!" He said, before laughing harder.
Kirby, not understanding the joke, but also not wanting to make his new teacher feel left out, began to laugh. Bandana Dee was a different story, instead saying, "You don't have to prove yourself, Your Majesty! I think you're the best!"
"That's because you're a Grade-A suck-up," Escargoon said, before turning back to the knight, "Do you accept it or not?"
The knight chuckled, and jokingly asked, "Kirby's also laughing, why not challenge him?"
"Maybe I will!" Dedede said without thinking.
What are you doing?
"And there you have it, folks!" Said Commentator Waddle Dee, looking at the news camera, "The King of Dreamland himself has challenged the pink demon, Kirby to a duel at Dedede Arena!" He put his microphone directly in Kirby's face before asking, "Will he accept the challenge?"
Kirby, unsure what to do, nodded nervously. While Escargoon and Zero both thought that the king had just signed his death warrant, Dedede was confident in his skills.
"Why not?" He said, proudly, "A little duel wouldn't hurt! See you at sundown, Kirbeh!"
King Dedede and Escargoon pushed their vehicle towards the auto shop, as hordes of reporters followed them, leaving the three of them to their training. While Meta Knight and Kirby were confused, Bandana Dee was very worried.
"This is bad," He said, "This is very, very bad!"
"I'm not too worried," Meta Knight scoffed, "Kirby's going to crush him!"
"You don't get it!" Bandana Dee groaned, "King Dedede's a lot stronger than he looks!"
"Really? He doesn't seem that strong..." The knight thought back at every enemy that he fought with unexpected powers, "Does he have a super-strong soul form?"
"I don't know," The captain admitted, "All I know is that he's the reason why Dreamland has not had a war in around 500 years!"
"Alright," Meta Knight sighed, "If it'll make you feel better, we will train him extra hard today!"
As the three of them walked into Whispy Woods, Meta Knight and Kirby felt something following them. Meta Knight paid no mind to it, but Kirby was a bit reluctant in following them.
=====
What were you thinking?
King Dedede scoffed at the voice in his head. Zero didn't have much faith in his skill, certainly not his skill in fighting Kirby, but the king just thought that he was being pessimistic. "Relax," he said, "I can handle him, no problem!"
Dedede's reply was also directed at the mass of reporters that followed them into the auto shop. One of them asked, "Your Majesty, will you give away the kingdom if you lose?"
"What?" The king did a double take before replying, "What? No! It's just a friendly sparring duel between protectors of Dreamland! Why would I sign the kingdom away?"
"Then what will you do?"
"I dunno," King Dedede pondered for a second before getting an idea, "The winner gets a feast dedicated to them!"
After the reporters murmured along themselves, Escargoon came up to them with a spray bottle. "Alright, paparazzi!" He sighed, spraying them like he was trained to do in this situation, "Time to scram!" The press was insulted, but they dispersed.
Now that they're gone, let's discuss strategy.
"Strategy?" Dedede wondered.
Should I send Dark Matter to possess your hammer? That would certainly help.
"I'm not gonna cheat! What am I, some kinda cartoon villain?" He whispered, "I can beat him myself!"
Can you, though?
"I'll be fine!"
Will you?
"I'm not pathetic!" He yelled, causing many to turn their heads. Realizing his mistake, he avoided their gazes and shuffled into the sanitation closet.
=====
Kirby and his trainers were at the edge of the Whispy Woods, ready to begin training. Bandana Dee went up to his pupil as Meta Knight warped away. "Alright, Kirby. Your training today is simple," He said, pointing deep in the forest, "MK put a flag next to Kabu. Bring it back in an hour, and I'll buy you an ice cream."
"Poyo!" Kirby jumped up in excitement and dashed into the forest. It took him around five minutes to realize that he didn't know the way to Kabu. He looked around, not knowing where to go next. He was surrounded by trees and the sounds of nature. It would've been soothing, had ice cream not been on the line.
Suddenly, Kirby heard tires screeching against the dirt. Going towards the sound, he wondered what it could be. Maybe it was someone taking a leisurely, off-road drive. Maybe it was Meta Knight, who got sick of flying and warping and decided to get a car. Maybe it was an ice cream truck!
He was so wrapped up in that last thought, he didn't notice the cliff until he fell off. When he hit the bottom, he bounced a bit before landing, lessening the hard impact. A bit bruised, Kirby looked around, but the noise disappeared. He looked around hopelessly before he spotted a strange rock.
The pink puffball walked over to the rock, curious at the strange coloration. It was mostly white, but had some orange spots on it. When he poked it, he was shocked. It was...fuzzy? Kirby froze when he heard it yawn. The rock turned around to reveal a face. It had a snout like a rodent, complete with whiskers. Round, orange ears came into view, along with stubby, white paws.
"Poyo?" Kirby asked, poking the creature.
"Mate, can ya please stop?" He yawned, "It's the middle of the night, let me sleep."
That didn't sound right. The sun wasn't that low, it couldn't have been that late. Kirby poked him again, checking if he was alright. After a bit of poking, he woke up, very annoyed. He was going to yell at him, but then it saw the sky.
"Oh, never mind. Guess I should get going," The creature struggled to get up, so Kirby helped him, "Thanks, mate. What are ya doing out here, anyway?"
Kirby tried to explain with charades that he was lost. It was challenging, with him trying to replicate falling off of a cliff because he thought that he heard an ice cream truck, but the stranger understood after a few attempts.
"Why didn't ya say so!" He said, beckoning him over, "I have a map back at my stump, follow me."
As he followed his new rodent friend, Kirby felt like something was watching him. Usually, when he felt that, it was Dark Matter following him to attack later. He had to remember to keep an eye out.
=====
"Kirby!" Bandana Dee called into the forest, ice cream in hand, "It's been an hour!" It had actually been longer. He was just being nice and getting him ice cream anyway. Even at the mention of food, Kirby was nowhere to be found. Sitting down and absorbing the ice cream into his face, he began to wonder what was taking him so long.
Meta Knight was supposed to warp him directly back to the entrance when he got the flag. Were the two of them battling? The knight did say that he wanted to train Kirby extra hard. Either way, that wasn't what they agreed on. He specifically said not to battle him, just place obstacles in his path.
Grabbing his spear, he was about to head into Whispy Woods when he spotted tire tracks on the ground. Intrigued, he decided to follow them.
Maybe he could find out what was going on.
=====
The rodent seemed to really like detours. By the time they reached a waterfall, Kirby gave up on the ice cream and decided to take in the scenery as well. The place that they had wandered into was actually really nice. It was a large, spacious cave with many shiny rocks illuminating the waterfalls. There was also a very large lake underneath the rock that they were walking on.
"There's nothing like taking in the world around ya and soaking it all in," He sighed, "What's your name, mate?"
"Kirby!"
"Name's Rick," The rodent casually responded, "You don't talk much, do ya?"
"Poyo..."
"Taking that as a 'Yes.'" Rick said, waddling out of the cavern, "My stump isn't that far from here, come on."
Kirby was about to follow him, but then he saw an eye peeking out from a shadow behind Rick. Immediately, he prepared a heart and ran at the shadow, which disappeared when he ran past his friend. He looked around in panic, before Rick put a paw on his head.
"Easy, Kirby!" He said, "Just breathe, it'll be fine. Relax."
Kirby did a quick inhale and puffed out some air, which actually helped. He sighed and laid down, using Rick as a fuzzy pillow. He didn't expect to be lifted up with his snout and tossed into the air. When he landed on the back of his partner, he grabbed onto Rick's head. It was surprisingly soft and relaxing. The hamster ran out of the cave, carrying Kirby on his back.
Kirby caught another glimpse of the eye, giving him a menacing glare. He gripped on tighter as he was carried out of the cave.
Eventually, they had made it to Rick's stump. It wasn't much, but it was a functional home. It had a pile of leaves that were weighed down with rocks on the sides, acting like a bed (he didn't need it, he was just sleeping next to a tree an hour prior). There was also a framed photo next to it, showing Rick with what looked like a girl version of himself, with a small, red heart in the corner. They must be good friends.
Rick ran to the other side of the stump and pulled out a leather backpack. From that, he pulled out an old map. Kirby grabbed the map and opened it. It consisted of a bunch of major landmarks, along with Rick's stump (which was drawn on.) The stump wasn't actually that far from Kabu. By the looks of it, it was only three inches away!
Handing the map back to his new friend, he was about to run to Kabu when a leaf was shot at him. It barely missed Kirby, letting him see that the leaf was sharpened. Rick took notice of this and blasted the next leaf with fire breath. This made Kirby jump, as he didn't realize that hamsters could breathe fire (Don't try this at home).
"We should get going, Kirby!" Rick said, throwing him on his back.
He began running off into the forest, when Kirby got an idea. Meta Knight was probably still at Kabu, but he couldn't remember where it was, especially not with razor-sharp leaves being thrown at him. He was panicking, he couldn't figure out where the leaves were even coming from, it was like they were everywhere at once.
"Ya good, mate?" Rick asked, concerned with how tightly Kirby was grabbing him.
Hearing his voice made Kirby remember what he said. Breathe. Relax. The pink puff inhaled and exhaled, looking around at the scenery. And then he saw a spot that looked awfully familiar.
His mind flashed back to a few days after he had come to Dreamland. Tiff was taking him to Kabu in her backpack and Kirby saw a purple owl fly through the tree line there. He grabbed Rick's head and gently turned him toward Kabu. He knew the way from there.
"Alright," Rick seemed content, "Guess we're going this way."
Every time Kirby recognized a turn, he gently tugged his fur in the direction. Eventually, they reached the valley, with the flag still waving proudly. Meta Knight was standing on top of Kabu itself, annoyed with the fact that Kirby had taken so long to get there. He got over it when he saw leaves being shot at his pupil.
Once Kirby and Rick had reached the valley, the onslaught stopped, and Meta Knight glided over to them. Kirby hopped off of his friend as Dark Matter emerged from one of the trees, calculating its next move. When it glanced at Rick, the pink puffball readied a heart, limiting the options.
While the standoff was happening, everyone heard tires screeching. The noise was a mystery until Dark Matter was hit by a truck. The impact sent the black blob flying into the sunset.
Kirby was shocked to see the Royal Guard jump out before the truck exploded against the valley walls. Well, most of the Royal Guard, Bandana Dee had come out of the bushes a few seconds later, out of breath. He was also surprised to see his teammates there.
"I thought that you guys were still injured!" He said, upset that he had to work alone.
"Lying to get out of work?" Meta Knight scoffed, "Doesn't surprise me one bit!"
"No, we had to-" Blade Knight started, before Sailor Dee interrupted.
"Help set up the arena for the fight!" She looked at the setting sun, "Which I think is about to happen."
Everyone looked over at the sunset, remembering Dedede's words. "See you at sundown, Kirbeh!"
Bandana Dee got an idea, and ran up to Meta Knight. "MK!" He said, "Can you warp us to the castle?"
"Don't call me that!" He shouted, before checking how much his cape could stretch, "No, maybe one at a time?"
The rest of them nodded as he grabbed Kirby and disappeared into his cape.
=====
Why didn't you just back out?
"It's a bit late now!" Dedede was outraged at this suggestion, "Besides, what would they think of me if I just backed out? They gotta know that their king will stand up for them!"
The king was inside of his locker room, with about five minutes before the match begins. Kirby hadn't showed up yet, so there was a chance that he backed out. That left Dedede a bit insulted.
Are you at least going to use the jet hammer? That's your best one!
"The normal one'll be just fine!" Dedede scoffed, "Besides, I came up with a strategy! It took me all day to prepare!"
"Sire?" Escargoon said from the doorway, "Kirby's here! Are you sure that you're ready?"
"Ha!" The king performed a flourish with his mallet, "Sure, I'm sure! I'm gonna clobbah that there Kirbeh!"
Dedede walked over to the elevator, making sure that he had everything necessary for his plan. If he won, he would prove himself to everyone! Including Meta Knight! If he lost, then Meta Knight would be right.
And what kingdom deserves a lazy, pathetic monarch?
=====
It was Kirby's first time in an elevator. It was like that room Meta Knight locked him in, back on the Halberd, but it was moving downward. There was some sort of meter on the side, showing his progress as the metal box sank deeper into the ground. As it approached the bottom, a strange feeling formed in his stomach. He took a deep breath as the elevator made a small noise and the doors opened.
Sensory overload was a mild way to describe what was through that door. There were spotlights shining directly on him, and the sound of the crowd booing (with some cheers) was a bit of a shock after the silent elevator ride. After his eyes adjusted, he walked forward on the path laid out for him.
There were people looking at him on either side, all the way along. At the end of the path, there was a large platform with some strange ropes on the side. He jumped over and saw a strange logo on the floor, the same one on the back of Dedede's robe. There were giant screens, all with the same image. It was an artist's rendering of Kirby and the king battling (There was a letter A on Kirby's foot, but that wasn't important). Looking through the crowd, he saw a bunch of familiar faces.
All of the people that had helped him train were sitting in the crowd, cheering loudly and waving flags (Mostly pink, but Bandana Dee also had a red one) for him. Nearby, Tiff and Tuff had brought pink, glowing sticks to help cheer him on. Tuff even had face paint in a pink Star pattern! All of this was nice, but then the lights dimmed and a certain song began to play from the speakers.
As the drums began, the lights shined and King Dedede ran from the side, jumping into the ring of ropes!
"Begin!" Commentator Waddle Dee screamed.
As soon as that word was said, Dedede charged at his foe, hammer held high above his head. Kirby dodged the incoming slam as it shook the ground, only for it to be followed by a horizontal swing that threw him into the ropes. The ropes bounced him a bit, and Kirby quickly recovered. At that moment, he realized that he couldn't do this without an Ability, so he looked around for something to inhale.
The king saw Kirby eye his hammer, and he got a bit worried, gripping to it extra tight. Dedede ran at his adversary, but proceeded to trip and fall over. Kirby harmlessly dodged and inhaled, hoping to get some sort of Hammer Ability. The wind had no effect on the king himself, but he grabbed his hammer before the pink puff could grab it. Just before he lost his grip, he smirked and let go as the hammer began to glow red.
Everyone thought that Kirby had basically won at this point. He was about to get a hammer ability and probably clobber the king. Which is why everyone gasped as it exploded just before it could get eaten causing Kirby to inhale a lungful of smoke (which is very bad, don't smoke).
"Rigging the hammer to explode?!" Commentator Dee said, as the crowd cheered for Dedede, "Absolutely genius!"
"Dedede! Dedede! Dede Dede Dedede!" (Most of) The crowd yelled.
The crowd gave the king a boost of confidence as he jumped surprisingly high into the air. Kirby, still rubbing the smoke out of his eyes, was blasted off of the ground by the shockwave of the king-sized landing. Now that his foe was airborne, King Dedede flipped his hammer around in his hand as it was set aflame, and then knocked Kirby into the ceiling!
"That was King Dedede's famous Hammer Flip technique!" The commentator said, sounding a bit worried, "It doesn't look like he can take another hit like that!"
By the feel of it, he was right! Kirby felt a stinging pain all over his body as he slowly floated down, flat as a piece of paper. Dedede listened to the cheers and began to show off a little. Kirby decided to take the opportunity, and fell down with his mouth agape. The king saw this and chucked a red, glowing hammer at the puffball. This time, Kirby managed to get it to exploded in his mouth.
King Dedede was a little scared when Bomb Kirby landed behind him, readying a bomb. When he threw it, Dedede used his mallet to knock it away. The orb of demolition readied two bombs and threw one, rolling the other one toward his foe. The king jumped over them with a super-high jump, as Bomb Kirby rapidly threw bombs at the descending king. After about ten bombs, he thought that it was over, but he was still shaken by the landing. King Dedede was still standing.
King Dedede was tough. The Star Warrior realized that as he was slammed into the ropes, losing his Ability in the process. The king, no longer taking any risks, pulled a spiky Gordo from his robe and chucked it at Kirby. After the puffball dodged it, Dedede pulled another one out and threw it, but his foe was prepared, kicking it back at the king's face.
The arena went silent as King Dedede fell to the ground, unconscious.
=====
The first thing that he felt was a pain in his face. Dedede sat up from his bed, nursing his wound, when Escargoon ran in, sobbing in relief.
"Oh, Your Majesty!" He cried, grabbing onto him, "You're alive!"
"'Course I am!" The king said, confidently, "I can survive a battle with Kirbeh!"
"Survive, yes..." They both looked over to see Meta Knight standing in the window, "Win, no... However, you lasted longer than I had expected. For that, you have my respect."
"R-Really?" Dedede said, crying at the thought of not having to see visions of him anymore.
"Yeah, sure, whatever." The knight shrugged as he flew away.
That news caused the king to jump up and start doing a little victory dance. "I did it!" He said to his advisor, "I'm free! I'm gonna have a feast to celebrate!"
"One problem," Escargoon said as Dedede sat back down, "Your kitchen staff is making a feast for Kirby, and it looks like it's gonna take all day."
"Aw, man..."